Chapter 7
Where Did You Go?
I blink my eyes until the darkness turns to blinding light to a clear view of the world all around me.
I prick my ears, and my jaws fall open as I try to look at anything and everything all at once. It's all so different from the Field.
A breeze blows by, and it's cold and I shiver. My fur fluffs up. It was never cold in the Field, and I don't like it.
Wildflowers grow in the grass beneath my paws, but there's dead grass and some of the flowers are wilting. The grass was always green in the Field, and the flowers were always blooming.
I see a baby deer run by a baby tree, chasing after their mother. In the Field, plants never changed. They never grew more, and they never shrank. Brook ate the grass, but it just went back to how it was. I ate mice, but there were never any fewer of them. I could walk the entirety of the Field with my eyes closed, because the landscape always remained the same.
But out here in Ragdon, it doesn't seem that way. Things do change.
Alex picks up a deer skull and holds it by an antler.
"Eesh, think that the Guard and Soldiers got hungry?"
"No," Phoenix replies. "Look at the teeth marks. Probably one of the wildcats or something out here. Mostly prey animals, but there's a few predators. Don't worry a hair on your head though, Brook. None of them would touch Astra. She smells like you, but even if she didn't, she's too fast."
Brook flattens her ears to her head. "I'm aware of that."
"Were you ever gonna teach her to fight?"
"No." Brook scowls at Phoenix.
"Why not?"
"Astra knows how to run."
"But she doesn't know how to fight," Phoenix replies.
"She never needed to before you all came along. She knew how to run. She can outrun anything. She can outrun the King and the Amethyst Throne."
Phoenix clicks his tongue. "And yet, she cannot outrun the cream puff forever."
"She wouldn't need to in the Field. The King did not know where she was for ninety years."
"Were you going to stay there forever? Genuine question," Alex says.
I turn to Brook.
We were, right? We were going to live in the Field forever, far away from the stories of the King and his Dragon setting fire to the world.
"We were," Brook confirms. "It was the only place I could say with any level of certainty Astra would be safe. Freedom and Jabez asked me to use my power to make that type of portal and create the Field."
"Can you only create that type of portal once?" Grey asks.
Brook nods. "Yes. The Field was never supposed to be found, not until Jabez and Freedom knew it would be safe for Astra. By design, the portal wasn't easy to find."
I think back to the fight. The fear that I felt, but also how Ky and Phoenix looked as they took down enemies. They made it look so easy. Couldn't I have done something?
Would Ky still be here if I'd known how to fight?
"Can I learn how to fight?" I ask.
Brook studies me, and I meet her eyes and prick my ears. I hold my tail high as I wonder what it might be like to learn to fight like Phoenix. I don't want what happened in the Field to happen again. I don't want to see dead people again, and I don't want to see Ky die again either. But maybe I could've done something. Maybe I could've tried to help and... not killed Guard and Soldiers, but instead stopped them.
But Brook doesn't look so sure.
Phoenix rolls his eyes. "Whatever, if you're not gonna reply, then let's get moving. We don't have all day. The sooner we get to the top of Ragdon Volcano, the sooner we find Arcane."
I trot forward, then turn around. "Which way are we headed?"
"That way." Alex points toward a giant mountain growing from the ground.
Ragdon Volcano, I assume. A flock of birds flies across the sky in front of fluffy clouds that remind me of the dandelions I saw in the Field and would blow on when Brook told me you could make a wish on one. I never had a wish— there wasn't anything I needed. All I needed was Brook.
We start walking, with Grey carrying Ky in his arms. It makes for a funny sight; Ky droops down over the sides of Grey's forearms. He's too big to be carried, but Grey doesn't set him down. But Ky still looks asleep and doesn't move or react to anything.
Trees grow all around us and are way higher than I could ever hope to jump. I wonder just how far I could see from the top of one. After passing by a few, I crouch down, angle my wings just right, and dig my toes into the ground. I throw myself upwards with a clap, and I start to climb the tree.
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"Astra!" Brook shouts, galloping over to me.
"Yeah?" I look down at her, twisting my tail to keep my balance.
"What are you doing?"
"I want to see what everything looks like from the top of the tree."
I peer around a branch and look out at the world. Off in the distance, I can see a purple castle with tall spikes and towers. Past it, I see a line of white, but it's too blurry to make out what it is. Ragdon Volcano is tall. It fills up the island and looks so intimidating. It's covered in dark rock, and everything looks so small next to it. I feel so tiny.
"Astra, come down," Phoenix says. "We need to keep moving. Get down here, or we're leaving you behind."
Brook pins her ears and glares at him.
Phoenix sneers back, wrinkling his muzzle. "Hey! I didn't mean we're actually gonna leave her behind, so chill. I just want to keep moving before we get found by another group of Guard and Soldiers. Don't want to find out what happens to bringing back Ky if his body gets injured in any way."
"I-I'm coming down," I say.
After calculating my way down, I dig my dew claws on my hind legs into the branch and carefully lower myself to the next one. I hop from branch to branch, wings spread for stability, until I'm close enough to the ground that I can jump. Brook offers me a smile once I'm out of the tree.
"We need to keep going," Phoenix growls. "We need to find Arcane."
xxxx
We walk for a long time.
Soon, we leave the tall trees behind, and the ground turns into fields of grass that are far longer than the Field ever was.
I had run ahead a few times and circled around the group, only returning when Brook called me back. I'd chased butterflies and stopped to examine flowers that caught my attention. I'd darted off in every direction to try and see everything on Ragdon.
But now I am tired. I trail behind Brook, plates on my tail dragging on the ground. I stopped asking when we would stop the fourth time Phoenix glared at me.
Brook looks over her shoulder. She swishes her own tail to scare away a fly.
"I can carry you," she says. "You can sleep on my back if you'd like. I'll watch over you."
I prick my ears and smile. "Yes! Thank you!"
I bound forward and leap up onto Brook, careful not to poke her with my claws. She keeps walking as I settle down, sprawling out with my chin on a forepaw. I watch the plants and flowers as we continue onwards, and soon the gentle and rhythmic movement of Brook's steps lulls me into sleep. Dreamland drags me under into its soft, cloudy embrace.
I sleep for a long time.
But then I wake up, and my surroundings have changed. Instead of grasses all around me, it's rock. I stand up on Brook's back, tail twitching as I try to figure out where I am. Dark rock is all around us, and as I look around, I notice that we're higher up than we were before. I can see the purple castle off in the distance, and below us, there's trees that look just like the ones we'd passed by earlier. The trees are below us, which means...
"We're on Ragdon Volcano now!" I say, hopping off Brook's back to examine the Volcano. I sniff at a plant, then wrinkle my nose at its bitter smell.
"So observant," Phoenix mutters.
"It's so tall," I say.
"Can we keep moving?" Grey says. "Ky is getting heavy, and I'd like to cover as much ground as possible before I need to set Ky down."
"I can take a turn carrying him, if you'd like," Brook offers.
Grey glances at Phoenix for a moment, but Alex walks over to her brother.
"Here, let me help," she says.
"You drop him, Brook," Phoenix warns.
Brook nods. "I'm aware, Phoenix. I remember what you told Grey."
"I don't care how many portals you create. I will never stop coming after you."
I explore the area around us as Alex helps get Ky draped safely over Brook's back. Flowers sprout from cracks in the rocks, and they're bright and colorful. I try and find every one before we start moving again.
I stick close by Brook's side as we make our way further up Ragdon Volcano. Grey and Alex frequently check behind us for any Guard and Soldiers, and Brook swivels her ears in every direction. I watch Ky. Every step Brook takes shifts him, and his ears wiggle. The red bandana around his shoulders flops over his neck. His brown eyes stay half open and half closed. He stares at the ground, but also through the ground, like he's looking at nothing.
I creep closer to Brook's side and crane my neck to meet Ky's gaze. He doesn't move. He doesn't blink. He just stares. I scamper away when my skin prickles and I feel unsettled.
Where did you go?
Maybe Arcane will have answers. But Arcane is also the one who killed Freedom, the mom I don't remember, the mom I never really met. Is there some reason? Is there an explanation? Surely there's a reason. Did Arcane really murder Freedom?
xxxx
When we stop for the night, my paws hurt and my legs feel numb. The sky is dark, but the moon shines bright. It's silver, just like it was in the Field. The moon looks the same, with the same circles and dots as it did every time I looked up in the middle of the night to look at it.
Brook lays down and folds her legs beneath her. Grey and Alex carefully lift Ky from her back and set him down on the ground. Phoenix watches them, then flashes his teeth when Grey goes to smooth out Ky's fur.
"Leave him be. I'll take care of my brother." Phoenix flicks his tail and then settles down beside Ky.
Brook stands up again and nudges me in close.
I feel so out in the open with no trees around, but when Grey and Alex sit down and Brook shifts in place until she's comfortable, I begin to get ready to sleep. There's no grass to nose at until it's just right or a patch of moss to lay down on, but I circle around Brook's legs a few times to find a good spot and then I curl up. I twist and turn again and again until I can finally relax, but sleep stays just out of reach.
"You keep moving," Brook says. "Are you alright?"
"I can't sleep," I say, stretching out and resting my head against Brook's hoof.
"Is there something I can help with?"
"I don't know."
"Is it the novelty of Ragdon and everything that's happened?" Brook asks.
I sigh. "Yeah," I reply quietly.
"It's been a lot for everyone. I'm sorry I couldn't have better prepared you, but I truly believed we would remain in the Field until Freedom and Jabez could come find us. I truly believed we could avoid the King and you would never risk meeting him unless the Field was found. I'm sorry that you are now in this situation without the preparation I wish I had given you."
"You can prepare me tomorrow," I offer.
Brook chuckles. "I suppose I can. You're very smart, you know."
"Can I learn to fight?"
"Let's discuss that more tomorrow. Safety is always a priority."
I yawn. "I'm gonna sleep."
"Goodnight, Astra."
"Goodnight, Brook."
I roll to my stomach and stretch out my forelegs and wings until they shake, and then I pull them both tight to my body and curl up with my back against Brook's leg. Dreamland takes me a while later, and I sleep.
When I wake up, it's still dark out, and the moon still glows in the sky.
Brook is asleep above me, and Grey and Alex sleep too.
But Phoenix doesn't.
He lays beside Ky and holds his brother in a hug with his forelegs. His back is to me, and his head rests on Ky's shoulder. Phoenix looks like he would be asleep, except that the tip of his tail curls every few seconds and his long ear —the one not ripped in half— flicks just as often. He takes a deep breath, but it catches and his sides shake.
I get to my paws and creep forward, tilting my head to the side in confusion. I stop a few paces away from Phoenix. He doesn't move and doesn't seem to know I'm there.
"Phoenix?" I whisper.
He freezes, flames on his body growing brighter for a moment.
"Go away, Astra," he hisses.