Joshua gaped at the destruction he had wrought.

Steaming pillars and smoking trees were all that remained of the once lush garden. The grass was gone, the earth under it scorched black.

He slowly looked down at his hand, then back up at the destruction it had caused, a smoking ruin where no life at all remained.

Finally, he spoke. “…Handy. But in what way is that a blade?”

You have slain 305 [Divine Seedlings]

You have slain 187,454 [Carnivorous Monarch Butterflies]

You have slain 477,012 [Carnivorous Monarch Butterfly Larva]

Overkill: You have slain all beings in this domain

You have satisfied the conditions set forth for a godmark

You have received a new godmark: ⟪Auspicious Contender⟫

Quest Complete: [Dinner Is You]

Reward: Congratulations. You are still alive.

With a sudden pop the armored goddess appeared again. The blood was gone now, as was her sword. “Oh dear.” She looked around at the destruction. “I didn’t realize the Guide would let you loot him.” She sighed. “Well, that’s one less domain to worry about. But I’ll just be taking those.” Before he could react, she booped him on his nose again and he felt a sucking sensation.

Suddenly four glowing items were floating out from his chest, languidly circling around in the air between him and the goddess.

They were small items, the size of action figures: An angry-looking red and black stone that Joshua could feel the heat radiating off of; a finger-sized sword made of lightning; a tiny toga identical to that which Randall had been wearing (though which now had a hole in it and more red than it had previously); and finally an utterly mundane-looking pigeon the size of a normal butterfly, squawking in a very unpigeonlike manner.

“Ah… you can keep this one,” the goddess said, disdainfully flicking the miniature pigeon in Joshua’s direction.

On instinct he tried to dodge, but wasn’t quick enough and the bird flew into his chest.

Instead of colliding with him, it very worryingly absorbed into him.

You have received [Sinister Pigeon]

[Sinister Pigeon] has bonded to your Soul Aspect

You have gained the Talent ⧼Sinister Pigeon⧽

You are now the steward of [Sinister Pigeon]

“What the— No! I didn’t agree to that.”

The goddess ignored him. She looked down at Randall’s corpse, sighed. “My dear sweet Wrath. Always leaving such a mess.” She held out her hand. White light emanated from it and surrounded the corpse, then both the body and light vanished.

She turned to Joshua again with a bright smile. “Good luck… whatever your name was.”

With that, she popped out again.

“Hey! Come back.” He looked around the devastated garden. “You can’t just leave me here!”

To his surprise, the goddess popped back in again. “Whoops. I probably shouldn’t leave you here. It’s not a place for mortals. If you didn’t die, you might end up becoming a god yourself.” She chuckled. “Can’t be having that, now. Where would you like me to take you?”

“Home?”

“Sorry, I can’t take you back to Earth. My forte is peace, not travel. Perhaps if you can reach what the mortals call Obsidian, you can get home that way.”

“And how far away is that?”

“Oh,” she said, voice filled with mirth, “for you, an unimaginable distance.”

“Splendid,” he said sarcastically. “I’ll just get walking then.”

She squinted her eyes, smile growing wide. “You know, I have just the place for you. I’m sure you’ll love it.”

With that, she disappeared, and this time took him with her.

[https://i.imgur.com/Ls4tykN.png]

There was no transition in the teleportation. One moment he was in a demolished divine garden, and the next…

Well.

This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

Joshua dumbfoundedly took in his new surroundings. It was far closer to a fantasy his brain might concoct while about to die on an airplane than the garden and giant god had been.

The air was comfortingly warm and filled with sweet perfume, the walls paneled in a dark wood and dotted here and there with abstract paintings that suggested much but revealed little. The floors were covered in velvet rugs and along the walls below the paintings were plush sofas on which sat groups of women who revealed much and suggested even more, and who were all staring at him.

Directly in front of him stood a desk that came up to his ribcage, a young woman in an elaborate yet scant outfit behind it, behind and above her a sign that read, welcome to herwen’s home for wayward men.

She too was staring at him, eyebrows raised.

Joshua realized the goddess had deposited him here without appearing herself.

That was absolutely fine by him.

“Sir?” the woman questioned, eyes wide in surprise. “Is everything all right? You have blood all over you.”

Before he had a chance to speak, Joshua suddenly disappeared again.

Then appeared once more, this time in a grand palace in front of a throne, the goddess sitting upon it, a goblet in one hand, a haunch of meat in the other. Her armor was gone, and she wore something like a cross between a toga and a ballgown as painted by a doujinshi artist, a crown lazily resting crooked atop her piled flaming hair.

“Whoops,” the goddess laughed. “Sorry. I was distracted while I was teleporting you. Mortals are so beautiful. And so ephemeral.” She gazed wistfully at nothing for long moments.

“Uh, if you could just send me back there, that would be great.”

The goddess shook herself out of her reverie. “Teleporting around mortals is always such a pain. You require so much effort. Wrath was certainly better at it. I imagine he had something grand—on a mortal scale—planned for you. Saving some far-off kingdom from a tyrant king, no doubt. He’s always doing that.” She sighed and her face fell, her goblet resting forgotten on the arm of her throne. “Was always doing that.” A scowl etched itself onto her perfect face. “But what’s the point? Mortals always die. That is their very nature.” She shook herself again. “Oh, look at me,” she said with a faint laugh, giving Joshua emotional whiplash, “getting all sentimental. Anyway, as I said, my forte is not ferrying around mortals. Though, I suppose it is now.” She looked thoughtful. “New power is always so…” She sighed. “This is not your concern. I took Wrath’s Sanction; I’ll send you wherever he was planning on sending you. One last favor.” She smiled in a way Joshua couldn’t interpret. “I’m sure it’s somewhere more fitting for an adventurer like yourself.”

“I don’t want to be an adventurer!” he protested. “Send me back there!”

“Good luck,” she said, ignoring him, “I’m sure you’ll do great with… whatever it is Wrath summoned you here for. Bye now.”

“Wait!”

But he was already gone.

Joshua swore. “I don’t know what I’m here for! You killed him before he told me!”

He looked around his new area. It had a distinct lack of attractive women.

He was in a small clearing, surrounded on all sides by a forest. Unlike Randall’s garden, there didn’t seem to be anything particularly special about it that stood out, other than several nearby plants with shockingly white flowers and brilliantly blue stalks.

“Now what am I supposed to do?”

New Quest: [The Basics of Life]

Explore your area and find supplies. Better hurry, and remember the rule of threes.

Reward: You get to live.

“Rule of threes? I don’t know what that is!”

And these rewards really sucked. Well, it was great that he got to live, but that seemed like it should be a given.

“Not anymore, Mr Baxter,” he muttered disgruntledly. “Not anymore.”

He collapsed to his butt. This was all a lot to take in.

Getting up and exploring the area seemed like too much work at the moment.

He could go over the user’s guide he’d seen earlier. He wouldn’t have to get up to read that. It was a lot of text though.

He sighed.

“So how do I—”

The screen appeared before he could finish.

“Well, at least it’s easy to use. And it can apparently read my thoughts. That’s not at all disturbing.”

[Divine Guide] User’s Guide

15th Edition

By Romulus «Scribe of the Divine»

Introduction

Welcome to the Fifteenth Edition. Those familiar with previous editions have no doubt noted many changes in this current iteration, the primary one being a change of medium. As this Guide is principally used by Tellurians, it tends to mirror technology on their world (or yours, if you happen to be one of them). As such, at the behest of Wrath, this Guide has been updated in turn to reflect advancements made there during the period since the Guide’s previous format change into a book.

While the Tellurians still appear far from any true Mind interface, having not yet even discovered the Aspects, they have created devices that somewhat simulate our more advanced technology through a concept which exists on their world that they call ‘physics’. Though this ‘physics’ has serious limitations, it is their only option for altering their world.

Though their methods are crude, requiring physical or voice input as though making an incantation, those methods of control have been added here, as they will be most familiar to a Tellurian.

However, the primary method of control via Mind remains, and remains the simplest to use.

Finally, bestowed spells now require enhancement to reach their full potential, thanks to an intervention by Equality.

Spell and organizational changes from the Fourteenth Edition

Please read carefully, as sections and bestowed spells have changed.

The [Divine Guide] now grants five spells instead of four. The new addition is [Map], which you may cast at any time to see a map of your immediate area and, depending on the spell’s stage of enhancement, landmarks, points of interest, various objects, history, and the wider world. Unlike the previous maps which accompanied the book edition (the fourteenth), this current iteration does not show the entire world to start, only areas you are personally aware of, thanks to aforementioned divine intervention.

The remaining four spells remain the same:

[Loot] allows you to loot not only physical items, but also incorporeally bound ones, assuming your enhancement is high enough.

[Identify] can tell you about lifeforms and objects in the world around you. At the starting enhancement, it can only tell you about less powerful objects.

[Storage] gives access to a personal storage space that neither occupies local space nor burdens you with weight. Lucky you.

[Grand Purpose] grants guidance in many forms, primarily by way of quests, for the completion of which you will receive rewards that can aid you in your Grand Quest (without direct divine intervention).

Next, and finally, the method of invocation for these divine spells has remained the same. That is to say, they require neither incantation nor reagent. Unlike other spells, they are activated in the same way as the Guide itself: via Mind.

I hope you find this manual helpful. Be sure to read it carefully. I suggest familiarizing yourself with the table of contents so that you may easily call up information in moments of need.

(Ed. Note: Section Four: Gods and Divinity, has been struck from this edition. Section Three: The Many Shards has been removed and its contents incorporated throughout the Guide in more appropriate areas.)

Below this introduction was something like a table of contents. A very, very long table of contents.

Joshua stared blankly at the giant list without retaining anything. He was in a bit of a daze, and disappointed none of the spells would let him teleport home.

“It would have been too much to hope for.” He let himself fall back onto the ground, looking up into the sky. It was a bright day, and no trees obstructed his view, though he didn’t see the sun anywhere.

“At least there’s not two of them.”