After extracting a promise from Joshua to help her rescue her brother—and to not cast anything else on her—Xylsie finished her examination of the stone door the man who had killed the slave overseer had phased through.

“So,” Joshua said, “since we’re old pals now, I don’t suppose you have any water on you I could borrow, do you?” He eyed her belt, which had all manner of items attached to it.

She frowned at him. “You want to borrow water?”

“Uh, drink? I’m really thirsty.”

“There’s lots of water outside that door.” She pointed at the wooden one he’d come through.

“Yeah. I’d rather not risk drinking that.”

She frowned at him.

He smiled back at her.

Finally she sighed, popped open one of the many pouches on her belt, and pulled out a soft skin. She tossed it to him.

He unscrewed the top and experimentally sniffed at it.

Smelled like water.

He shrugged and took a sip.

Then he kept drinking.

He’d known he was thirsty, but as soon as the water hit his tongue, he couldn’t stop.

In under ten seconds, he’d drained the entire skin.

He let out a contented sigh, eyes closed.

When he opened his eyes again, he found Xylsie staring at him.

“Thanks.” He handed it back to her.

“You drank all of it.”

“I was really thirsty.”

She glowered at him, stowing the skin back on her belt without looking.

“So?” Joshua asked, gesturing at the stone door. “Find a way in?”

She shook her head. “If there’s a way to unlock it, I can’t see it.”

“Are we sure we want to go this way? It’s where the guy in scary armor went. I mean, he’s probably gone by now, but what if he’s not? What if he’s just waiting there to ambush us?” Joshua thought about this for a moment. “I guess that’s not very plausible.”

“It’s this or find out where the water outside leads. And I’m not risking swimming in that current if I don’t have to.”

Joshua grunted.

She studied him. “Your aura says you have at least one or two talents. Any that might help us get it open?”

“You can tell I have two talents just from my aura?”

“Yes. Truly, how do you not know these things?”

“I’m from another world. I was kidnapped by a giant naked man with a penchant for the dramatic, then he died—well, was extremely violently murdered—and I ended up here.”

She frowned at him. “You were being serious about being from another world?”

“You’re not even going to ask about the violent murder?”

She raised an eyebrow. “Is there another way to be murdered?”

“Yeah. Not violently.” He sighed. “I’m from Earth.”

“Never heard of it. Not that it’s surprising if it truly is another world.”

Joshua tilted his head. “They called me something else… Oh, it’s in my stat screen I think.”

“Your what?”

“You asked me about talents. I do have two. One is like an interface thing. Tellurian.”

She frowned at him. “Having a conversation with you is very confusing.”

“Thank you. And you are very beautiful.”

Her frown deepened. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“I’m still here, aren’t I?”

She shook her head. “Just tell me what your talents are.”

“Do you know what a Tellurian is?”

“What does that have to do with your talents?”

“Nothing? I don’t think. Or maybe it does. Some games have racials, and this interface has been suspiciously game-like. Though going by the guide to the guide, I think that was actually by design. If they can just pluck people from my world, it’s not surprising they could keep up with advances in technology and the exploding popularity of video games and modify their fancy little guide to follow suit.”

She pressed a palm against the bridge of her nose. “Please make more sense. Is that one of your talents? Confusing people?”

“It’s a character flaw. As for my talents—which are large and considerable”—Joshua pointed at Sin—“that’s the only one that might be useful in this case. But it wasn’t having much luck.” Joshua looked down at the part of the door the bird had been pecking at and saw that it had actually taken out a not-insignificant chunk of the stone. “Or maybe it was having some luck.”

Xylsie knelt to examine the damage. “A talent? Do you mean a familiar?”

“Yep.”

“That explains why he looks so unusual.”

Sin squawked indignantly.

She ran her finger over the divot the bird had created. “He’s made some progress. But waiting for him to break through will take too long.”

“Are you sure he’s a he?” Joshua looked at Sin. “Are you a he? I never thought to ask.”

Sin squawked several times.

“I’m not sure that was an answer. Though come to think of it, I think Randall called you a he. I imagine he'd know.” Joshua scratched his head, frowning. “Did he call you a he? My arrival here’s a bit of a blur. Maybe I really did hit my head when I fell down that embankment. Or maybe it’s the venom. Or the joy shard I took. But I only have a countdown for the venom. Would I have a status icon for a concussion?”

Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.

“Please try to focus,” Xylsie chastised him.

Joshua nodded firmly. “Right, door. Why don’t— Oh! Bastard.”

Sin squawked angrily.

Xylsie suddenly had her axe at the ready, looking for threats. “What is it?” she hissed.

“Sorry, I just remembered something. I called him a…” Joshua glanced at Sin, “a… B-word—the boy one not the girl one—and he got mad. Then Randall told me his dad was a touchy subject. Sin’s, not Randall’s. Though I imagine maybe Randall’s too, given his Ken-doll appearance.”

She lowered her axe. “What? What are you talking about? Who’s Randall?”

Joshua shook his head. “It’s not important.”

Xylsie let her axe become a bracer again.

“That is so cool,” Joshua told her. “How do you do it?”

She rubbed her face. “I’m going to lose my sanity if I keep talking to you.”

“Recently it’s been clothing and undergarments, but I guess I can’t complain. You do have a whole Slave Leia thing going on with that skirt.”

“Slave? You think I look like a slave?”

“Sort of? There’s this movie where…” He trailed off. “Actually, it would probably take too long to explain. And saying it out loud’s kind of embarrassing.” He furrowed his brow. “Or maybe empowering.”

“You are truly distracting.”

“Why thank you.”

“It’s not a compliment.”

“An insult is just a compliment said with passion.”

She laughed once, groaned, shook her head. “The door. Focus.”

“Right, yes. What about the door?”

She rolled her eyes. “Opening it. What’s your other talent? Can it help us here?”

“I don’t see how it would.” He looked at the door. “Can’t you just break it down with your axe? If my familiar can do that much damage with his beak, I’m sure you can punch right through it.”

“I likely could, but I’m not reckless. There’s an ethereal residue. It could be a trap. Punching through it, as you say, may cause it to explode.”

“The guy in black armor phased through it. Maybe the residue is from him?”

“Perhaps,” she said, though didn’t sound convinced. “I can’t be certain whether it’s an enchantment, a rune, a script, some other kind of trap, or if it’s simply what it seems on its face: residue. In any case, it’s too much of a risk.”

“If it was trapped, wouldn’t Sin have set it off?”

“Sin?”

“My familiar.”

She shook her head. “Right, you’re from another world and know nothing. Since he’s a familiar, he might not set off a trap if it is tuned to people. Or it hasn’t yet registered his pecking as trying.”

“I do have a weapon I could try.”

“After I just told you it might explode?”

“No risk without reward.” He thought for a moment. “Flip that. I think.” He brightened. “Oh! Come to think of it, I found this robe. Scornweaver robe. It’s too high rank for me, so you’d have to use it. I think it basically lets you summon whatever a scornweaver is. I also have the shard, but that’s depleted.”

She stared at him.

“Would that be helpful? The robe I mean. Obviously the shard’s useless.”

“First of all, that is amazing. You have some impressive items for being here so limited a time.”

“I don’t like your skeptical tone,” he said haughtily. He gestured at the overseer’s body. “You can thank her for my fortune. I think. They’re women’s robes.” He pulled the robe from his inventory and held it up for her. “Want to try it on?”

She gave him a flat look.

He shrugged. “It can turn into a scornweaver. Would that help?”

“How would a scornweaver help on a stone door?”

“Um, no idea.”

She shook her head. “Have any other amazing items?”

“I do. Well, amazing might be a stretch. But I’ve got a rabbit horn, skeleton, meat, and organs—don’t think those would help, though the skeleton is super durable. A mantle of death—it’s called mantle but it’s just a cloak with a hood. I’m not sure if that’s what all mantles are. I thought they were something above fireplaces. Anyway, I’ve also got some attractive wolf parts—the pull you closer, not the good-looking kind. Some depleted daemon shards. One that’s not. It’s a uh… octovine. It’s like a plant crossed with an octopus. Super weird. Some slippers. A uh… bra that’s… adjustable”—he scanned his inventory cubes—“aaand… a ladder. I’m not sure that would help in this situation. The hood—or mantle, I guess—has an execute ability? That could be useful if the door’s alive, and to face what’s beyond it. It made me feel like I was going to fall over when I tried it on, so it’s another item you’d have to use if your rank is high enough. Oh and the weapon I mentioned, of course. It’s a claw.” He winked. He wasn’t sure why and regretted it immediately.

She stared at him blankly.

He hastily put the robe back in his inventory and was about to remove the claw when there came a crash against the wooden door at the other side of the room.

Both he and Xylsie spun to look at it.

The door rattled again, followed by muffled voices.

“Friends of yours?” Joshua asked.

“I was about to ask you the same.”

The door handle turned and the door eased open.

“Moron!” a voice shouted. “I told you it was unlocked.”

In the doorway stood two small figures Joshua recognized.

“Not you two,” he groaned.

“You know them?” Xylsie asked, axe at the ready. Joshua hadn’t even noticed her form it.

“Old friends,” he said sarcastically. “They sure are persistent.”

The kobold and goblin stopped arguing, facing the two of them.

“Intruders!” the kobold roared.

“Idiot,” the goblin chastised. “Don’t waste time telling them what they already know.”

“She’s the one we’ve been tracking!”

The goblin rubbed his face. “And now he’s telling me what I already know.” He looked at Joshua. “What are you doing here, woman!”

Joshua pointed at his chest. “Me?”

“No! The other wo—” The goblin stopped and frowned. “Oh, I guess there are two of you. Yes you.”

“I’m a he!” Joshua protested.

“Really?” The goblin crossed his arms. “Why are you so tall then?”

“Don’t be stupid!” the kobold growled. “All of their females are tall.”

The goblin ignored this and marched into the room. “You’re coming with us. You’ll answer for—” He stopped as his gaze fell on the covered body. “Rituals! You can’t perform rituals. You’re not authorized.”

“Uh… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Joshua said, unconvincingly, despite truly not knowing what the goblin was talking about.

“You stole one of our slaves. You need Lady Tasha’s permission to steal.”

“Thief!” the kobold growled in agreement.

“She knows that, moron!” the goblin snapped.

“I’m not a she!”

“Your wiles won’t work on me, woman!”

Xylsie sighed. “I don’t have time for this.” In a blur of motion, she shot off across the room toward the goblin.

Sin, who had been standing by the stone door watching the exchange, let out what sounded like a warcry and took to the air, zooming after her.

“She’s a Gray!” the goblin shouted. “Retreat!” He was already running toward the door.

“Coward!” the kobold growled and charged, ignoring his retreating companion and leaping for Xylsie.

She swung her giant axe, using the flat side to bat the half-sized creature straight out the doorway.

Joshua heard a splash a moment later.

“Filbert!” the goblin shouted mournfully, skidding to a halt and peering out over the ledge at his companion. “Nooooo!” he moaned. He spun just in time to get the butt of Xylsie’s axe to the face, knocking him off the side to join his friend in the water.

Sin, who hadn’t been fast enough to get in on the action, cawed in annoyance and landed on Xylsie’s head.

Joshua joined her by the ledge, and all three peered over, watching as the current rapidly carried the two figures downstream.

“No!” the goblin spluttered, clawing uselessly at the surface. “Not the Waterfall of Disposal!”

Several yards downstream from him, the kobold was dogpaddling in the opposite direction of the current, but was losing ground.

Then the goblin slammed into him, latching on for dear life, and all ground was lost as they both were swept away.

“Why didn’t you kill them?” Joshua asked.

“They’re only Whites. I would never shame myself by stooping so low as to murder them.” Xylsie shrugged. “Also, this seemed quicker.”

“Good to know honor’s important here. It’s a relief to not have to worry about higher rank people killing me because I offended them.”

“Eh, we don’t so much venerate honor as detest shame.”

“That… was sarcasm.”

From the corner of his eye he caught her smiling.

“I know,” she said.

They watched the two figures carried into darkness, clutching desperately at one another like drowning ants, alternating between yelling pleas and rather creative obscenities the whole way.

When they could no longer be seen or heard, Xylsie looked at him. “Any other friends I should know about?”

Joshua shook his head slowly, still staring at the water. It was a good thing he hadn’t tried to go that way. Waterfall of Disposal did not sound promising.

“Good.” Xylsie nodded once, then frowned, noticing the extra weight on her head. She raised her hand, finger extended, and the bird jumped onto it.

She lowered Sin in front of her. The two stared at each other for a moment, then the familiar hopped onto her shoulder.

“Traitor,” Joshua said.

In response, Sin nestled down against Xylsie’s shoulder and covered his face with his wing and began making what sounded like quiet, high-pitched snores.

“Yeah, that does seem comfortable.” Joshua shook his head. Recalling something the goblin had said that had been bugging him a great deal, he focused his attention on Xylsie. “I have a serious question for you,” he said gravely.

She raised an eyebrow, but nodded. “Okay.”

“This is very important. Like, seriously, I can’t think of anything more important.”

She grew serious. “Go ahead.”

“Do I…” Joshua swallowed. It was hard to even ask the question. He took a breath and steeled his resolve. “Do I look like a girl?”

Xylsie stared at him for long moments, and he was glad she was at least taking time to think about it. But it also worried him, because it shouldn’t be something you had to think about.

Then she sighed wearily and headed back into the stone room.

“You didn’t answer my question!” he called after her. “At least tell me if I smell like one!”