Alone with the god’s corpse, Joshua found himself staring down at it in a daze. He looked at where the supposed goddess of peace had just been, down at himself, around the area, back to the corpse.
He repeated this several times until he finally noticed that several of the giant butterflies he’d seen fluttering about when he’d first arrived had landed in the intestines and appeared to be eating them.
He grimaced. That couldn’t be what they were doing. He was misinterpreting what he was seeing.
They’re just… curious, he assured himself.
He shook his head, drawing his attention away from the corpse.
Was he stuck here now?
He gave the area a more thorough study than he had before and noticed that there wasn’t much land behind him. The ground just… stopped.
He stood there for long moments, staring dumbly at what appeared to be the end of the world. The blue sky turned to black dotted with stars, the ground ending in a ragged edge, like he was on an island in the middle of outer space.
“Well that’s implausible.”
He hesitantly walked to the edge, his Crocs squelching with giblets of the god, and peered over. “An endless abyss. Great.”
He took off one of his Crocs and carefully tried poking it past the edge to see if it would freeze, but came against an invisible barrier.
He put his footwear back on and peered into the abyss. As he studied it, he saw there weren’t only stars, but specks of what looked like land, far in the distance.
“Far out of my reach even without the forcefield.”
Feeling a little nauseous, he moved back away from the edge, stopping several feet from the giant corpse.
He needed to find a way home.
This made him think of his new interface, as the oxymoronically named god of peace had called it. Hadn’t she said something about utility spells? Maybe one of them was teleport.
Though the text was gone, he could feel the interface there, waiting to be activated.
It was quite disturbing.
But of all the things that had happened to him since he’d been plucked from a doomed aircraft, this was the least of them.
“Uh, how do I work this thing?”
Welcome, to the [Divine Guide]
Would you like to read [Divine Guide User’s Guide]?
“You’re joking. A guide to a guide? Sure.”
Another wall of text appeared before him.
He read through the first several lines.
[Divine Guide] User’s Guide
15th Edition
By Romulus «Scribe of the Divine»
Introduction
Welcome to the Fifteenth Edition. Those familiar with previous editions have no doubt noted many changes in this current iteration, the primary one being a change of medium. As this Guide is principally used by Tellurians, it tends to mirror technology on their world (or yours, if you happen to be one of them). As such, at the behest of Wrath, this Guide has been updated in turn to reflect advancements made there during the period since the Guide’s previous format change into a book.
While the Tellurians still appear far from any true Mind interface, having not yet even discovered the Aspects, they have created devices that somewhat simulate our more advanced technology through a concept which exists on their world that they call ‘physics’. Though this ‘physics’ has serious limitations, it is their only option for altering their world.
The message went on like this for a good while.
“Can’t I get the TL;DR?”
He wasn’t expecting anything to happen, but the wall of text was replaced by a much shorter screen.
He reconsidered his previous notion about this not being a dream.
It still felt absolutely nothing like a dream, and he was nearly one-hundred percent certain it wasn’t, but now, in addition to being summoned to a fantasy world to apparently save it, he had what appeared to be a videogame interface in his brain.
Name: Joshua Baxter
Species: Tellurian
Tier: Mortal
Rank: White
Enhancements: ❬0❭
Aspects
Divine ❬0❭ (Talisman: [Divine Guide])
Body ❬0❭ (Affinity: None)
Mind ❬0❭ (Affinity: None)
Soul ❬0❭ (Affinity: None)
Talents
⧼Divine Guide⧽ ❬0❭ (Aspect: Divine)
Spells
[Map] ❬0❭
[Loot] ❬0❭
[Identify] ❬0❭
[Storage] ❬0❭
[Grand Purpose] ❬0❭
“Great, a character sheet. That isn’t what I meant.”
If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.
At least he’d found the spells Peace had mentioned. Unfortunately, none were teleport. Still, he supposed he should go through them.
First though, he needed to get away from this corpse. It didn’t have any smell he could detect, but it was just plain gross.
He also needed to wash off. He was soaked in blood and gore. Turned out a giant twice the height of a normal man had a lot of it to go around.
Joshua looked around the area. Discounting the abyss behind him, the garden stretched far into the distance and looked very easy to get lost in. Not that it would matter, since he had no idea where he was in the first place.
Still, he felt some odd attachment to this area he’d been summoned to. Maybe there was a portal or something here that he could activate with his interface.
He looked down at the corpse, which now had even more butterflies on it. “They’re just curious,” he once again assured himself.
“Yeah…” he said several seconds later, still watching, “they’re definitely eating him.” He could see them gnawing away bits of intestine and then holding them to their mouthparts with what looked like tiny human arms.
“Giant, carnivorous, humanoid butterflies,” he said dully. “Just the spice I needed.”
As he stared at the disturbing insects feasting on the corpse of a god, wondering if that toga was hiding anything useful—if the god had summoned it from nowhere, what was to say it didn’t have dimensional pockets?—a new message popped up.
Loot [Randall, God of Wrath]?
“Randall? Your name was Randall? What kind of name is Randall for a god of wrath? And why would a god of wrath summon me to save the world? And why me? All I can do is shoot bows from horseback and climb things.”
The corpse did not answer.
Joshua rubbed his face, felt it was slick with something he didn’t feel like dwelling on. He sighed and lowered his hands. “Sure. Why not?”
Even as he said the words, he worried things were about to get even more disgusting. He really had no desire to loot a dead man’s body.
Luckily, it turned out he didn’t have to do the dirty work himself.
You have received ⦃Affinity Stone⦄
You have received ⦃Blade⦄
You have received ⦃Pigeon⦄
You have received ⦃Toga⦄
The god was now once again naked, though seeing as he had no bits and bobs, it oddly felt to Joshua like being on the set of a TV show, the corpse but a prop. Its massive size only lent to this sense of unreality.
As did the giant butterflies, which were slightly put off by the disappearing toga, but quickly returned to their meal, now with easier access that the garment was no longer in the way.
Joshua focused his attention on the loot notifications and discovered he could make them expand with just a thought, showing more information about the item.
[Affinity Stone of Wrath]
(affinity stone)
Affinity stone of ultimate fury.
“Affinity Stone of Wrath?” Joshua wondered aloud. “That sounds suspiciously familiar. Do I have to worry about a uniquely chinned and relatable villain coming for me now?”
He shook his head and moved on, reading the descriptions of the rest of the items.
[Wrath’s Blade]
(weapon)
A weapon of divine might.
[Sinister Pigeon]
(familiar, legion-type)
A familiar of unmatched resilience.
[Luxurious Toga]
(clothing)
A very large toga made of the finest materials.
It was only at seeing the mention of a sinister pigeon—which was an apt description if he’d ever seen one—that he realized the mohawked pigeon that had been on the god’s shoulder was nowhere to be seen. Also missing were the colorful birds he’d spotted upon first arriving. The only sign of life now anywhere in sight were the bowel-loving butterflies.
The pigeon was listed as a familiar, so it must have disappeared or unsummoned when Peace killed Randall. And maybe all the other birds too? Was that what legion-type meant?
Joshua frowned. “Hey, where are my items?” They seemed quite useful.
Well, except for the pigeon and toga.
He thought of his aircraft being brought down by the pigeon.
Maybe it was useful too.
And a divine toga might have special abilities.
Okay, so all of them could be useful.
Which made him again wonder where they were.
No interface popped up at this thought, however.
“Uh, inventory?”
The only response to his inquiry came from the butterflies that had been feasting on the corpse as, one by one, they took to the air, fluttering above the carnage in what looked distinctly like a holding pattern.
Joshua wasn’t sure if he was losing his mind, but it seemed they were all staring at him.
Then one swooped in his direction.
New Quest: [Dinner Is You]
Kill the butterflies before they can dine on you.
Reward: You get to continue living.
“Kill them with what!”
Suddenly a second of the butterflies flew his way, then a third and fourth, and then all of them were flocking toward him.
Hadn’t he looted a weapon from that dead god?
“How the hell do I use—”
Before he could finish the question, a message appeared.
Activate [Wrath’s Blade]?
“Yes!” he cried, the first of the butterflies now a mere foot away.
He felt an icy cool power flow through him and, as though on instinct, he took a step back and held out his hand. Instead of a sword appearing, however, a massive bolt of lightning so bright it actually lit up the already bright blue sky even brighter burst forth and completely incinerated not just the butterfly he’d been aiming at, but the entire kaleidoscope, as well as the garden for as far into the distance as he could see.
----------------------------------------
Outtakes
(Sometimes my mind wanders when I’m writing. This is the result. Obviously not canon 💀)
Standing in the smoking ruins of what was once a divine garden, Joshua gaped.
A portal made of smoke and light bloomed into existence in the midst of the destruction, right in front of him.
He got a sinking feeling as he realized where he recognized that effect from. “Oh no,” he said dejectedly. “I can’t fight the boss in the second chapter.”
The goddess stumbled out, looking rattled.
Joshua chuckled in relief. “Not gonna lie, you gave me a bit of a scare there. I was expecting someone else.”
She stared down at him with a look of wide-eyed horror. “No… no. What have you done?”
He shrugged, feeling awkward. “I didn’t mean to destroy everything. I was just trying not to get eaten.”
“Not that, foolish mortal! You’ve summoned… him!”
“Him? Who’s him?”
“Him!” She pointed at the cloud of smoke and lightning she’d come through. “That isn’t my portal!”
As Joshua watched, a giant, purple man stepped out from within it.
“Ah. Crap.”
The giant, who was still shorter than Peace, surveyed the destruction. “A seventh Stone. Amazing.” His eyes locked onto Joshua with such intensity that it was like the giant man was peering straight into his soul. He held out a gauntleted hand. “Hand over the stone. Maybe you don’t have to die. That’s up to Fate.”
“Actually,” Joshua said, “I think there’s been a misunderstanding. Two, maybe. The first is that all this,” he twirled his finger about, indicating the destruction, “was caused by Wrath’s Blade, not the affinity stone. Second, it’s affinity, not infinity.”
The goddess was nodding along eagerly.
The purple giant stared them down, still smiling. “Enough talking. Your words matter not, for I…” his voice deepened and slowed, “am…”
Joshua sighed. “Here we go,” he muttered under his breath.
“Inevitable!” the mad titan finished, his words rumbling the very air, lightning flashing in the sky overhead, thunder rumbling, and orchestral music beginning to play from nowhere.
“He’s taken control!” Peace cried. “He’s too powerful!”
The giant laughed. “Indeed little one.”
Joshua frowned. “Bruh, she’s taller than you.”
The giant ignored him. “And with the Wrath Stone, I shall be unstoppable! Mistress Death will be pleased.”
“Hold up,” Joshua said, “I thought you were doing this out of a sense of justice? You know, bringing balance?”
“Justice?” He laughed, deep and booming. “Have you seen Death? Total Babe.” His smile widened, showing bright horsey teeth. “A face to die for.”
Joshua groaned. “Did you just make a joke? This is serious.”
“You’re one to talk,” the goddess muttered.
“True,” Joshua conceded. “Anyway,” he said to the giant, “speaking of death, I can see you’re going to need some convincing. So let me demonstrate.” Joshua called up Wrath’s Blade, took aim at Thanos, and very precisely wiped out exactly half of the giant’s body.
Joshua looked down at his hand, around which lightning crackled. “I’m getting better at this.”
“Wow,” Peace said, staring at what remained of the body. “That was easy. Maybe you should take Wrath’s place. There’s an opening now.”
“I’ll consider it,” Joshua agreed. He studied the corpse. Its smile was still frozen in place—the half that remained anyway. Joshua tilted his head, covered one eye, held out his other thumb like a painter might, then nodded once. “Yep, exactly half. If you were still alive, I think you’d appreciate the irony.”