I am more wool than bones most days, threads more than skin
Tangled, frail, and ready to unravel with one tug.
But I can't unravel quite yet so I knit
With trembling clumsy hands, I knit a sweater that hides my glitching heart and gloves that warm my ever-cold-seeking hands
I make pants that hide the way my legs circle around and a hat to lower over my eyes and cover the overwhelming fear of being seen.
I am wool more than bones
And I have to knit all I am
So that people don't reach
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it's taken without the author's consent. Report it.
That one frayed thread
That is capable alone of ending my tries.
I don't let go of them
And I don't get close to people who can knit
They can't see the crossed lines and the failed tries
They can't see how I can't ever make my threads into something worthwhile.
But still once in a while, I creep closer with a weakness I name my heart's
To watch the steady gentle hands tug and link colourful lines
Carefully, softly
With worthy results.
And I stop myself with everything I have
From throwing myself at their hands
And begging with hushed teary words
To please
Fix what I am.