The room went silent. Nyx’s bloody tears never slowed. I could feel everyone watching her.

“I must destroy myself,” she repeated.

Even with her shaking hands, the blade never dug in any deeper. Everything around me slowly faded away until it was just the two of us. I stood almost a dozen feet away, but it might as well have been a dozen miles.

Is being an artificial soul that bad? Is it something so important that she’ll kill herself over it?

“Don’t.” The soft word glided from my lips.

“Why do you care?” Nyx asked. “You want me dead, isn’t that right? Well, here’s the secret you’re so desperate to learn. If I die, that is it. I don’t get another shot. This is my last life. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it? Isn’t it?”

A deep sadness grew within me. I felt pity for her. She was so broken. So alone. The look in her eyes said she couldn’t understand why anyone would help her.

I closed my eyes, taking in a slow breath. “It is. But I can’t let you die because of this. You don’t deserve death. Not like this. Not because you’re an artificial soul.”

“But that’s what I am. I can see that now.” She gripped the blade tighter. “He has no reason to lie to me. Drohkus doesn’t care if I live. Only the Soul Nexus cares if I live. It only cares, so it can use me to solve whatever twisted puzzle that revolves around you. My life is meaningless now!”

I took a step forward. “That’s not enough reason to kill yourself.”

Nyx laughed. “That’s rich coming from someone like you. How many people have you killed to get this far? Your soul isn’t just an artificial soul, it’s incomplete, like mine. But you know what? That doesn’t matter. You’re a murderer and a thief. Before you came here, you stole from those around you. You stole so you could eat, have a bed to sleep in for the night, wash yourself in a shower, and for what you called necessities.”

Her voice rose with each sentence. “You came here, and you’ve killed. How many bodies have you climbed over to get here? How many more will you climb to get what you want? What do you want that is worth so many lives and so much chaos?”

I froze as I whispered, “I want to live.”

“Pathetic.” Venom dripped from the word as she spat it. “That is the weakest excuse ever.”

My mouth moved on its own. “You’re wrong. But also, you’re right.”

Words continued to fall out of my mouth. “I was a thief. You’re right. I took so much from those around me. You’re right. I killed people. But I never wanted to. I never enjoyed it. But I had no choice. I had to survive, and I didn’t have anything else I could do. I was only human. I was weak. I couldn’t fight. But now I’m not.”

My hand clenched into a fist. “I can fight. I can protect others now. I won’t let you die because of what you are. If I have no right to live, then I will earn it. If I can do it, then you can too. Because, if I let you kill yourself because we are the same, I might as well kill myself. And that’s something I can never do.”

I shook my fist at the vampire. “So I will live because I have chosen to live. I have two sworn sisters who I want to experience life with now. That’s something I would’ve never had if I had given up.”

The blade slipped from Nyx’s grip. It hit the ground and shattered into tiny red shards. Her eyes fell on me. “You want to save me? A cosmic assassin sent to kill you, a vampire, an abomination, someone who has murdered more innocents than you can ever count?”

“This isn’t about saving you.” I walked towards her. “You want to kill the Soul Nexus? Because it made you into an artificial soul?”

She lowered her head. “Yes. They experimented on me. They want to see if I can replicate your progress.”

I kneeled next to her. “You’re still thinking like you’re alone. You’re not. The Soul Nexus will answer for their crimes. You can’t make them pay if you kill yourself.”

She looked at me. “Why would you want to help me? Why would you want to save me?”

I gave her a sad smile. “Because if you kill yourself now, what would that mean about all those you’ve killed? You say you’ve killed far more than me, and yet you questioned my killings. Have you done the same to yourself?”

She collapsed into a sobbing heap. I stood up and went towards Killa and Shadara, who were standing with a mix of pride, sadness, and confusion all over their faces.

Drohkus clapped his hands. “Impressive and almost moving display.” He adjusted his posture so he sat up straighter. “You seek self-validation. That’s interesting. But you see, there’s more about you I want to know about.”

I lowered my head. “I don’t have it in me to answer more questions. Can I have some time alone, with Killa and Shadara?”

The demilich tapped his staff on the ground. “Fine, but you can’t leave this building until you’ve answered my questions. Then, and only then, will you be free to go. Deal?”

“What’s the alternative?” Shadara asked.

“I imprison you and force the answers out of you anyway,” Drohkus said without skipping a beat.

I held up a hand. “Alright, we’ll stay.”

The ground in front of the demilich split open, and a green misty specter floated out before the ground returned to normal. “Follow this specter to one of the guest rooms. When you’re ready to talk, just tell him. I’ll hear you.”

Killa pointed to Nyx, who was still crying. “What about her?”

I shrugged. “Nothing. Leave her be. She’s harmless to us now.”

With that, he disappeared, taking his throne with him. I walked after the specter, following it through the twisting hallways. Finally, we arrived at a small bedroom. A large window on the far wall offered a view of the outside.

I walked over to the bed and flopped onto it face down.

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

I closed my eyes and let out a heavy sigh. In the seconds after, both Killa and Shadara sat beside me, each resting a hand on me.

Shadara spoke up first. “Are you all right?”

“No.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Killa asked.

What is ‘it?’ “I don’t know,” I murmured.

Shadara rubbed my back. “Can we do anything to help?”

The numbness from earlier returned, but it felt different. My mind was disconnected from my body. My body was alert, responsive, and eager to do something. It was everything my mind wasn’t.

“I don’t know,” I replied as I curled up in the fetal position.

“Will a hug help?” Shadara asked.

I pulled my knees even tighter to my chest. “I don’t know.”

She gave me a sympathetic smile. “Then I guess we’ll have to find out, won’t we?”

The panther woman held me in her arms like I weighed nothing. Something about being in her embrace made me feel safe. But as my head rested against her chest, her heartbeat filled my ears. The simple sound pointed out a detail I had been ignoring about myself for quite some time.

My heart had stopped.

I hadn’t given it any recognition because, at the time, I didn’t have the time or space to digest what had happened. But as I listened to the slow, rhythmic thumping of Shadara’s heart, I couldn’t hide from that fact anymore.

Orange, why don’t I have a heartbeat anymore?

The function of your heart is no longer required. The same is true for many of your organs now. Your nanites are capable of self-location, efficient transportation of oxygen, and other functions. To save on passive energy consumption, those organs have been paralyzed.

Rather than wait in torturous anticipation for the question, I decided to bring it up myself. “Aren’t you going to ask?”

Shadara held me tighter. “Nope. You’ll talk when you’re ready. I won’t push you again.”

Killa leaned back onto the bed next to us. “Nyx, Lyman, the beastmen, Drohkus, all of them have done nothing but push you. The things Nyx and Drohkus said to you were hard to believe. Everything you talked about felt so far above me that if I tried to help, I’d only make things worse.”

She smiled at me. “We offered a hand when we got here, but I can see now. You’re tired—exhausted, really. Get some sleep, actual sleep, without training or anything. Just stop and relax. Cedar is right; we’ll talk when you’re ready.”

Shadara rubbed the top of my head and added, “When your heart’s in it.”

A mirthless chuckle escaped me. “Interesting choice of words. My heart’s not going to be in much of anything anymore. I might as well not have one.”

“That’s a bit extreme, don’t you think?”

I sighed. “No. Along with a dozen other organs, I don’t physically need it anymore. I augmented my blood so that my nanites now are my blood.”

Killa shifted until she was sitting upright. “You’ve been slowly transforming into a golem; will it stop?”

I took a heavy breath as I pushed myself out of Shadara’s arms and onto the edge of the bed. “Drohkus, I’m willing to talk about my body now.”

A swirl of green mist seeped out of the stone floor. Sitting in an onyx chair, the demilich appeared in front of me. His eyes bored into mine as he drummed his fingers on his staff.

Seconds dragged on as he stared me down before he spoke. “I’m listening—intently.”

I scratched my neck. Where do I begin? Slowly, my mind settled on a starting point.

I took a deep breath. “You’re right; I’m not human, at least not completely anymore. My body is a lot closer to being a golem from your perspective.”

Drohkus held up a hand. “I’m going to stop you there. Golems are animated by arcane energies. That’s not what keeps you going. It’s neither positive nor negative energy either. It’s something keeping you alive despite your lack of a heart.”

Orange, what’s he talking about?

Positive energy is associated with universal life and healing magic. Negative energy is the opposite and is associated with necromancy and decay. There are other energy types, such as arcane energy, which is pure magic and cosmic energy, the most basic form of energy from which all energy is derived.

Your body runs on atomic energy. Atomic energy is the hardest to utilize and harvest. This atomic energy is not like the kind that causes nuclear explosions you’re familiar with. All molecular compounds, when broken down, release stored energy. We collect this energy and use it.

Although I maintained a neutral expression, the understanding that my body was disintegrating every substance I ingested into atomic particles was alarming. But I gave Drohkus, Killa, and Shadara the brief concepts as Orange continued to explain things in far more detail than I understood myself.

“But in the end, magic can’t influence atomic energy.” When I finished, Drohkus tapped his chin while both Killa and Shadara looked completely baffled.

I’m glad they kept their questions to themselves. Killa and Shadara will probably just accept things as they are, but Drohkus feels like the one to ask a lot more questions.

The demilich hummed. “So that’s why you’re both living and not living while not being undead or a construct. So what are you?”

I swallowed a lump in my throat. I might as well let it all out. “The technical term is an android. I’m slowly becoming an android as I replace part after part of my body.”

“What’s an android?” Shadara asked.

I ran my hand through my hair. What’s the best way to describe this? Drohkus already said that a golem is a bad comparison.

You will be a living sapient, sentient construct with a soul.

My eyes fell to the floor. “If I say a living construct, will that make sense?”

“It helps.” Killa waved her hand to present herself. ”But hey, I’m literally made of goo and magic. Being an ordinary human’s overrated.”

I kicked a foot. “But you’ve always been a slime. Change—it takes some getting used to.”

Shadara rubbed my shoulder. “Is it something you want to get used to?”

I held my hands out, staring at the black metal that was my skin. “It’s strange. It’s much like puberty, when your body changes so much. The growth, hormones, social expectations—everything being different, and you didn’t decide it. We just accept it because it’s natural. The difference is that I chose to start down this path. Like puberty, this is happening slowly, and it isn’t bad. It’s just new, and I’m adjusting.”

“Puberty?” Drohkus practically snorted.

I threw my hands up. “Look, it’s not the best way to describe it, but it’s what I know.”

The demilich waved his hand. “My intention wasn’t to belittle your explanation. In fact, I found it quite insightful. I can relate on some level. Becoming an undead lich was something similar.”

He pointed to my metallic hands. “So, your current form is like an early adolescence, and your body is still transitioning into an android? Is it artificial, like your soul? These nanites, how do you control them? Do you control them?”

Sympathy from an undead? Why is Drohkus, as domineering as he is, more amicable than the living beastment?

I nodded slowly. “In a manner of speaking. My thoughts communicate with the nanites about what I want them to do. They then work to fulfill that order.”

I still won’t tell others about my unique system after what happened with Bark. Killa knows, but she’s smart enough not to tell others if I don’t tell them first. And Orange will always be my secret.

Drohkus nodded. “Interesting. It’s sad that you can’t control them more directly. And that atomic energy sounds useful. But, alas, since my magic has served me well these millennia, don’t fix what’s not broken, right?”

I cocked my head to the side. This guy is weird. “That answered all your questions, didn’t it? Are we free to go?”

He raised his staff and tapped me on the head. An instant later, a pile of yellow gems appeared in my lap. “There’s a lot more where that came from. I can learn about your soul from the nanites that you don’t know about. If you stay, I’ll keep paying you for your information.” He turned to leave. “However, I’m still trying to wrap my head around artificial souls. Maybe I should just examine Nyx instead.”

Killa perked up. “About her. Can you tell us what you plan to do with her?”

Green mist swirled around Drohkus, but stopped at his waist. “Nyx is none of your concern anymore. I don’t intend to kill her or torture her, if that’s what you’re asking. But I am interested in her artificial soul. I want to run some tests. Also, she needs some punishment for her failure. But I assure you, I won’t kill her or ruin her body.”

He waved his hand as his body melted into the green mist. “That concludes our business, for now.”

Shadara looked at me. “You’re going to bed, young lady.”

I hung my head. “Yeah, I think I need to take a break. Maybe think some things through.”

Killa put a finger to my lips. “No thinking, just sleep. Promise?”

I pushed her finger down and hugged her. “Okay, I promise.” I then turned to hug Shadara. “Thanks for being here with me. It helped a lot.”

Shadara ruffled my hair. “You’re the little sister; we’ll look after you.”