Chapter 16

I hate dreams

“What! You can’t be a noble! You’re nice,” I practically shouted at him.

He took on a more defensive tone. “Nobles can be nice. I admit some Nobles are dicks, but not all of us. I’m honestly surprised you didn’t recognise me as a noble. My family’s name is pretty well known.”

“You may not be a dick, but you are a bit thick,” I laughed slightly. “I really don’t care enough about nobles to memorise their names. Also, if you are a noble, what are you doing out here? Shouldn’t you be in your manor being waited on hand and foot?”

“My mother hated the idea of me even going to medical school. My father was all for it until I graduated and told them I wanted to be a field medic. My father wanted me to work in his office, but I wasn’t going to sit back and watch the war for the sanctuary of the Sun City.” He fiddled with his dark grey skirt as he spoke. “I ended up enlisting even though both my parents were against it. I have sent them letters, but I think they are still angry. The day I left, they didn’t even talk to me. You know, you are right, nobles are dicks. I’m so glad I didn’t stay in the Sun City.”

“I’m sorry, Staggy. That’s such a bitchy thing your parents did. Completely off topic, but what’s your full noble name?”

Staggy chuckled slightly. “It’s Me-Li-Stagtum-Sal of Flangroda Hall.”

“What’s the ‘Sal’ at the end? I have never heard it in any name, ever.”

“It shows my rank and status in my family. Sal is for unmarried first-born sons; it’s Wal for an unmarried first-born daughter. My father has Sif at the end of his name, and my mother has Wif. That shows the head of the house and that they are married.”

“You nobles are insane. Why do people need to know when you were born and your marriage status?”

“When I go to a ball and I’m announced, then parents there know that I am an eligible bachelor for their daughter or son. Not that they don’t already know who I am. Every noble knows every noble. I could list every noble family name in the Sun City.”

I could barely get the words out because I was laughing so hard. “You’ve been announced at balls?” I couldn’t imagine Staggy descending stairs into a ballroom while they announced his presence. I had never seen him out of his medic’s uniform, so trying to imagine him in nobles’ finery was impossible. Even in Pallmin, the medic uniform would have been simple dressing. They wore a simple black shirt, a blue ascot, and a knee-length grey skirt. It was simple and boring.

Staggy started laughing along with me. “It was weird at first for me as well, but you get used to it. You kind of have to. I’m a pretty good suitor, being a first-born son and heir to a large estate. The first ball I attended after my sixteenth birthday, I seemed to dance with every boy and girl my age. My parents were overjoyed, me not so much.”

“This is why I don’t want to be a noble. I want to be able to choose who I marry, not have someone choose for me.”

“That’s part of the reason I wanted to become a field medic. I wanted to get away from my noble life. I wanted to make friends, not have my parents make them for me.”

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“I’m glad you went against your parents wishes. If you hadn’t, I wouldn’t have met you. You mean a lot to me, Staggy.”

* * *

We set up the camp, but not before it got fully dark. The winter solstice was coming up. The time of the dead was coming to an end.

That night I felt a huge part of me was missing. I was missing Calla. He was gone. There was nothing I could do.

Despite the cold, I lay on the ground, staring at the stars.

I cried silently. My tears gently rolling down my face.

I felt a sudden warmth next to me. Someone’s body settling next to mine. “Calla? Is that you?” I turned to face the person who had just laid down next to me.

“I’m not Calla. Sorry Rico.” Staggy had come and laid next to me.

“Oh. Hey Staggy. Do you need anything?” I couldn't keep the disappointment out of my voice.

“They did the burnings before we left the old camp. I need to fill out Figras card, but my hands won’t stop shaking. Could you just write down what I tell you?”

“Of course.” I wanted to be left alone, but Staggy needed help, and I wasn’t about to turn him down.

Under Staggy’s instructions, I filled in Figra's death certificate.

Ossorian Pîdantrës death certificate

Full name: Di-Figra

Date of birth and death: Turtani 6, 93 - Leechi 14, 110

Place of birth: Gramtia

Parents place of residence: Sun City

Father: Di-Yamula

Mother: Di~Naminta

“Thank you, Rico.” He was crying. I think I may have been crying as well. “I’m going to bed now. Good night, Rico.” He said it while he stood up.

“Good night, Staggy.”

I lay back down on the grass. I stayed there for a bit longer, but in the end the cold got to me, and I headed to my tent to get some sleep.

* * *

I had a dream that night.

I was lying in bed with Calla. I had wrapped my arms around his warm, alive body. I could feel the rising and falling of his chest with each of his breaths. In the dream, my eyes were closed, but I could tell I was lying in my bed at home. The sheets and pillow were just right.

When I opened my eyes, it was Calla lying next to me, but his body was broken and bloody. I held him in my arms. My whole room was red with his blood. The only thing in the room that wasn’t blood red was his eyes. His eyes. Blue in a sea of red.

I woke up. I sat blot up right in my bed. Tears streamed down my face.

I couldn’t sleep for the rest of the night. I stayed up sweating and shaking till the bell rang out across the camp.

Getting ready was a blur. I wasn’t really paying attention to anything. I had a pounding headache that made it hard to think straight. I was still shaking.

I didn’t really want to eat anything. Just the thought of eating made me want to throw up, but I got a plate and put a tiny amount of whèintõmba onto it. Staggy looked at the tiny portion I had served myself but didn’t say anything.

I sat down with Staggy and Gill. They started talking about something, but I couldn’t be bothered to listen. I just sat there for about five minutes, moving the slop on my plate around with my fork.

Staggy then invaded my mind by poking me and calling out my name. “Rico! Are you even listening to me?”

“Huh? What do you want?” I was slightly dazed, and my headache was only made worse by his yelling.

“Are you all right? You’ve been zoned out for about five minutes. Also, you’re not eating. I know you don’t like whèintõmba but you normally eat something.”

I gave him a strained smile and said, “I’m really all right. I just sleep badly.”

I narrowed his eyes, but his words were said in a caring way. “Just eat something. You’ll feel better.”

I nodded and shovelled a tiny amount of slop into my mouth. I forced myself to swallow. I did that four more times but felt so sick that I had to stop. I felt like throwing up.

I clutched my stomach to try to stop myself from puking. To distract myself from the ever-growing urge to throw up, I listened in on Staggy’s complaining.

“The medics are stretched so thin right now from the last battle, and now Sting is spreading across the camp. We got ten people coming to us coughing and throwing up this morning. We had to set up the second tent to keep them quarantined from the rest of the patients. The worst part is we can’t even do that much for them out here but hold a handkerchief to their mouth as they cough up their insides. We can give them medication and watch them, but in the end, that’s all we can do.”

It was at that moment that I stopped being able to keep the food down. I was kind enough to turn away from Staggy and Gill before I threw up into a nearby bush.