Res had always thought he had seen the most disgusting thing. - A potion of fertility made of fermented rice and rat babies. When he plunged into the canal full of shit and piss, he decided fermented rat babies weren’t as bad as he had thought.
Fluids and solids were trying to make their way through all the holes in his body. When he surfaced, he gulped in lungfuls of air. Which turned out to be a mistake when the stench in its complete glory assaulted him. Res threw up. A lot. He plunged into the depths of shit and piss again and made his way onto the surface. Then he threw up again and plunged down.
This process repeated itself and, after some time, he was only dry heaving. The current continued to carry him further and further away from the palace. In a stroke of luck, Res managed to hold on to the ledge of the canal.
His entire mind was focused on trying to get out when Jason said. “Res, if you don’t want to be killed because of the baby-spider-grenade, you need to stay.”
The only words Res stammered out were panicked denials, but James remained calm. “Bro, remember when you asked me how to get that off your body? The only way is to bathe in a substance that smells even more disgusting than rotten spider baby corpses. I know it seems fucked up man, but endure it.”
Res contemplated killing himself but dropped that train of thought. To Jason’s chagrin, Res found stairs where he made himself comfortable. In a weird trance, he sat on the steps and watched the shit and piss flow past. “Bro, I can’t believe you are taking a wellness vacation in the sewers. hahaha”
“Shut up.”
“Hey, that is …”
“I can hear steps.” The seriousness in Res’s tone shut Jason up.
Aether formations in the tunnel walls emitted dim light. Legends say that the lights are the remnant of an ancient city. The sounds of the muffled conversation got clearer and clearer. Res could make out a childish male voice saying: “I will kill Erick one day. He took all my copper coins even though I had already paid taxes.”
A deeper, but still young voice replied: “Yes, I want him dead, too. He took even took my bread. If someone messes with my food, I will kill him.”
A firm female voice interjected: “Shut up! Both of you know that you only talk and do nothing. If you say you will do it, then do it. If not, then don’t say it. Besides, no one can kill Erick, anyway.”
By now, Res’s gaze had landed on a doorway behind him. Three street urchins emerged out of the pathway. In front of the group walked a ten-year-old boy, wearing only some dirty rags. Behind the boy followed the fattest guttersnipe Res had ever seen. The last person to emerge from the tunnel was a girl with clean red hair. The boy in front had stopped when he saw Res bathing in the canal.
Annoyed, the fat boy behind him shoved him forward: “What is it, Brent?”
“Look … ” The young boy pointed at Res with his index finger.
They stared at each other for a moment and Res returned to looking at the opposite canal wall again. The slim boy was the first to recover his wit: “What are you doing in there?”
“Bathing.”
“I can see that but … ”
The girl tugged at the shirt of the slim boy, Brent: “He is crazy. Let’s leave before things escalate.”
Instead of following her advice, Brent approached him. “Sorry for my manners. My name is Brent. What is your name?”
Res thought of different fake names, but before he could settle on one, Jason spoke up. “Bro, tell him your name is sensei. Pleeeeaaaaasseee?”
Res figured that he could do him that simple favor. “Call me sensei.”
“Ok, so sensei. Do you know that bathing in shit makes you sick?”
Res told the first lie to pop up in his mind: “I do it to strengthen my body.”
At the mention of strengthening one’s body, the eyes of the two boys lit up: “Are you a body cultivator?”
“Ahhh, yes. You could say that.”
Without hesitation, the boy lowered himself into the sewage next to Res. The girl cried out in indignation, but the boy, Brent, ignored her. Res couldn’t believe his eyes. “That boy bathed in shit because it MIGHT make him a body cultivator?”
Brent put on a brave face and ignored the stink of the place: “Mr. Sensei can I be your disciple?”
From the back of the room, the girl let out another cry of exasperation as the fat boy joined them as well. The fattie lowered himself into the sewage next to Res as well. “I want to be a body cultivator too, Mr. sensei.”
In the back of his mind, Res could hear Jason’s roaring laughter. Finally, he couldn’t stop himself and joined Jason’s laughter. All the stress he had gone through was channeled into it. Both boys were looking at each other as if they were already regretting their decision.
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When his laughter abided, Jason spoke up: “You have suffered long enough. You should find clear water soon; the risk of infection is too high. Spin the boys a tale that you will show them techniques if they show you clear water.”
“I can’t lie to those boys. That would be against my moral code.”
“You know what, bro? Because you’re such a good pal, I will teach you basic cleansing acupuncture. Their aether channels will be clean and their body control will improve.”
“You can do that? I thought the art of acupuncture was a myth?”
“Well dough, I am the king? Besides, that is actually not true. One of my successors spread that lie because he feared subjects with long life spans.”
Res tucked that piece of information away and answered the boy’s previous question. “I can’t take you on as disciples, but I can only strengthen you and set you on the path of body cultivation. First, help me find fresh water to clean myself.”
Both of the boy’s eyes gleamed with eagerness and they grabbed his hands. “We know just the spot only ten minutes away, sensei.”
The girl didn’t seem so eager and hissed at the boys to run away. After the promised ten-minute walk, they arrived at a giant cavern. It was supported by enormous stone arches that were hewn out of the natural soil. Through the cavern ran a bubbling stream, and Res went about cleaning himself. The boys followed suit while the girl tried gave him angry looks.
While the boys were cleaning up, Res focused his attention on Jason. “What should I do now?”
”Don’t worry. It’s simple hand acupuncture, bro. You only have to remember three spots: The lung meridian which runs from the tip of the thumb, down to the wrist. The inner gate point, which is two centimeters above the wrist on the back of the hand. Last but not least, the outer gate on the same spot but on the other side of the arm. Try to put one finger on each of them and then follow my instructions on when to press down.”
He called the eager boys over and Brent, the slim street urchin, wanted to be the first to undergo the procedure. After some back and forth with Jason, Res had found the right spots on the younger boy’s hand. “Ok, bro. Concentrate on me now. 3 … 2 … 1 lung, inner, outer, outer, outer, inner …”.
Res tried to follow the pattern of applying pressure as best as he could.
He didn’t notice that Brent was only staring at his now sweating form in confusion. “I should leave … ”.
Jason’s string of commands stopped and Brent collapsed like his strings were cut. Dazed by the exhaustion, Res staggered a few steps back and sat down on the floor. The girl and the fat boy hunched over the still form of Brent and both of them shouted at the still form to wake up.
“Bro, you are talented. You may have no muscles, but you have determination that can rival my own. I regret my decision to overtake your body less and less every minute. If I were you, I would get as much distance as possible between you and the boy. I have only once experienced the body cleaning of a street urchin and it was nasty.”
Res retreated from the limp form of Brent while the other children glared at him. “Bro, are you sure you don’t want to be a martial artist?”
“No, it’s too much of a hassle.” Like Jason had said, black goo poured out of every pore.
Both children gagged on the stench and the girl shouted at Res: “Isn’t it enough to kill him? You even have to curse him to stay alive as an undead?”
Res looked at her in apprehension: “Calm down, miss. I don’t plan on turning anyone into a zombie. The black goo are his impurities being flushed out, so he can start cultivation.”
“I don’t believe you! You are a sick bastard who enjoys hurting children.”
Before Res could object, Brent coughed and stirred. “Why does it stink?”
The fat boy hugged Brent even though most of the goo now covered his clothes too. Brent pushed him away and asked: “Stop that. What happened to me?”
The girl was about to go on another rant, so Res spoke up: “I have cleaned your aether channels. After you wash, try out your new body.”
Nobody objected to Brent taking a bath in the stream. When the slim boy stepped out of the stream, an elated smile spread across Brent’s face and ran around the chamber. During his romping, Brent laughed like the child he was. Brent came to a stop in front of him and prostrated himself: “Master, I will be forever grateful. I feel so light now. Please let me stay by your side and I will serve you as best as I can.”
At the thought of a ten-year-old following him around, he responded: “No, that isn’t possible. I … I have important cultivator stuff to do.”
The excited look on Brent’s face turned into a disappointed one. “Sensei, can we at least be allies? Friends?”
As much as Res hated to admit it, the puppy eyes somewhat influenced him. “All right, you can view me as an ally.”
“Thanks Sensei. Can you please do that hand massage on all of us?”
Res spent the next minutes purifying the fat boy’s body who had a similar reaction to Brent. When the girl saw that Res didn’t want to harm them, she warmed up towards him but didn’t want him to do acupuncture on her. The girl and the fat boy had given him their names, but Res hadn’t listened and didn’t want to bother asking again.
Brent had taken on a serious face and turned to Res: “Sensei, what can we do for you in return?” After some thinking, Res settled on his most immediate problem. “Can you lead me to the crafting districts through the sewers?”
Res had figured that in this new life outside his noble family, the most pressing concern was money. He couldn’t work as a merchant, as someone would find out his true identity. Being a soldier meant being at the whim of a fat lord and being a peasant was too taxing. The only line of work left was crafting. Brent grabbed Res’s hand and led him down another tunnel: “No problem. I know the way.”
The rest of their journey went without a hitch. Apart from the occasional grumble from the fatty who didn’t enjoy walking. They finally emerged in a back alley in the crafter’s district through another sewer’s entrance. The main street was illuminated by flaming torches and the sound of metal on metal filled the air. On any other day, the shops would be closed now. On the initiation day, parents went on a shopping spree for their talented children.
“Hey Jason, do the smaller initiation crystals the citizens use also contain ghosts?”
“Yeah. That shit is totally not cool. They imprison aether users that are against the royal family in a fucked-up ritual. I told you I had some freedom in my crystal, right? Like some fine kitsune bitches. They do that because they want me to be content and not destroy the expensive crystal.”
“Hmm.”
“The people entrapped in the smaller crystals only float in a white void. The forgers can get away with that because their souls are weak and they can’t break out of the crystal, anyway. That’s a torturous existence, bro.”
“Hmm. Seems like a perfect existence to me.”
“Whaaat are you stupid? Wait … Have you ever had any feelings toward a woman?”
“No”
“That’s it! We will have to get you laid!”
Feeling that the conversation got off track, he turned to the three street urchins. “Thanks for bringing me here.”
“No, we should thank you for strengthening us. Sensei, I promise you that no one will ever beat me.”
The passionate response surprised Res, but supposed it would give the boy purpose. “Yes, do that. I must go. Goodbye to you all.”
Without looking back, Res left the three children in the dark alley and started his job hunt.