Nick was not having the best of times at the moment. Sure, wandering through a dark ship in the middle of the night, searching for a psychotic killer wasn't as bad as being tortured, but it wasn't his idea of a particularly good time either.

Not to mention the blood dripping down his back. At first, it felt like he shit himself. You know, when the blood ran down the crack of his ass all warm and wet and sticky. But now it was just cold and uncomfortable. At least the bleeding has mostly stopped, but still, the residue remained.

And to think, this is the second time he's broken into a ship in the dead of night. But this time, there was no Nami to hold his hand. Disappointing, but at least there isn't a creepy clown fetish room in this one.

At least, he hoped not. That was not a trauma that needed repeating.

Tiptoeing along the creaky floors through a dim and dark hallway, Nick tried to spot anything that could lead him in the direction of the missing Buchi. Unfortunately, he was currently unable to see all that much, because he didn't have any source of light besides whatever drips of moonlight came through the windows in the adjourning rooms or from the entrance behind him.

Man he wished he had a flashlight right about now. Or a Nami. A Nami would be good. One who carried lanterns somewhere on her person, a place Nick suspected but could not confirm. Her boobs, if you were wondering. It was the only place big enough to hide something like that.

All that was missing from this scenario was flashes of lightning briefly lighting up the room he was in, allowing the audience to see the person he was looking for was right behind him.

Turning around as fast as he could, Nick was both relieved and disappointed to see no one there. That's one horror trope to cross off the list. For now at least. But there was certain to be more, and the only way to defeat a trope, is with another trope.

Nick knew just the one. And it even required his potent vocals!

"One… two… Nicky's coming for yo-ah! Mother fucker!" Nick yelled in shock and pain, hopping around on one foot while holding the other, his toes throbbing in pain. As he flipped around to keep walking down the hallway, he just so managed to stub his toe on something.

"Damn that hurt! What the hell did I kick?" he asked aloud. Whatever it was, was noisy as hell. Looking down with an angry growl, he immediately spotted the culprit, his anger giving him the power to see in the dark. Not really, but he felt like it did.

Squatting down to get a better look at the object, he was only mildly surprised to see a metal tool box, with its contents sprayed across the ground. "That explains the noise," he mumbled, picking up a fairly large screwdriver.

But not why it was there. Did Pett leave it out? The jerk. If the old guy survived he would get a mild scolding about putting tools away. It was just dangerous!

"Ah, what's wrong? Having trouble seeing in the dark?" asked a voice from everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

"Bitchy? Is that you?" Nick asked standing up, holding the screwdriver up like it was one of the swords he needed to get back. He tried looking around the darkened hall to spot the voice. But everywhere he looked was empty.

"My name's not Bitchy!" he shouted back, and Nick could practically feel the spittle hitting his face from the other man's rage. Made him very grateful that he hadn't actually found him yet.

"No, I'm pretty sure that's your name," Nick called out again, hoping to figure out just where in the hell he was hiding. A task that was proving difficult, as it didn't seem like Buchi was willing to reveal his location that easily. He was dumb, just not as dumb as Nick would have liked.

But that just means he would have to make him even angrier. Enough to make a mistake.

"I think I know my own name!" Buchi shouted back.

"Really? You think you know? Does that mean you aren't sure?" Nick called back, and he could damn near feel the hall vibrating from the growl he got in response. Perfect, just a little bit more and this little ventriloquist act would be finished.

"I'm sure I'm going to kill you!" Buchi shouted back, and this time Nick could tell he was somewhat close. Not sure how close, but he wasn't as far as he thought.

"No you're not," Nick said back in a sing-song voice, grating on Buchi's nerves.

"Yes I am!" Buchi shouted back.

"No you're not."

"Yes I am!"

"No you're not."

"Yes I am!"

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not!"

Nick stood there, in the dark, with a shit eating grin on his face. He wasn't sure Buchi understood the classic bit of wordplay fuckery, but it was only a matter of time until he realized he'd been tricked.

"Wait! I didn't mean-what I meant-gah! Damn you!"

"Come now, don't be so upset. It's good you realize you won't be able to kill me. You're much too fat," Nick responded glibly to the pirate's fury. Normally his bullshit spewing mouth got him into trouble, but maybe this time it would get him out of it.

"I told you it's muscle!" Buchi denied once more. But his denial was the final straw. Nick now knew exactly where he was. That being said, where he was didn't make much sense.

"...How the fuck did you get up there?" Nick asked in disbelief, staring at Buchi who was hiding above him, arms and legs doing the splits to hold himself up by pressing firmly against the walls on both sides of the hall.

Most of his body could barely be seen in the poorly lit hall, but what was visible was his eyes. They glowed with a cat's incandescence. Nick was starting to wonder if one of his parents was an actual cat.

"I climbed," Buchi stated simply.

"Oh, I see," Nick responded. The two stared at each other for a moment, before Buchi let out a loud yell, dropping from his uncomfortable looking perch and descending straight for Nick.

"Oh shit!" Nick yelped as he dove out of the way, Buchi landing with a thunderous bang. Nick was certain he felt the whole ship shake from the impact. If he wasn't already crouching on the floor, he was pretty sure he would have landed on his ass.

Or been squished by Buchi's prodigious girth. Now that he thought about it, that would have been the perfect time to execute another Shoryuken. Buchi was big, but he wasn't as big as a grizzly bear, so he was sure it would have worked this time.

Oh well, he was sure there would be another opportunity. Right now he had bigger things to worry about over a missed opportunity to perform a classic piece of video game history.

No matter how much it stuck in his craw.

Nick watched as Buchi stood from his crouch, pointing his screwdriver at him threateningly. Did he feel silly doing it? A bit. But you never know when something could turn out to be useful.

"And what do you plan to do with that?" Buchi asked, glaring holes into Nick. Said brown haired man looked down at the large screwdriver in his hand, as if contemplating the question, before raising his head and giving Buchi a cocky smirk, "Why don't you come over here and find out."

"How about I take it from you and use it to screw you to death!" Buchi shouted, proud of himself for saying what he thought was a clever one liner. But Nick was not nearly as impressed as the other man thought he would be.

"First your brother and now you? Listen, it's not that I'm not flattered, because I'm not, but I'm just not into you that way. So I think it's for the best if we just stayed enemies," Nick said, in as comforting and sarcastic a manner he could.

"...I hope you've said your prayers, because it's time for you to meet your maker," Buchi ground out through grit teeth, one eye twitching in irritation. He was more than a little peeved at the brown haired jackass in front of him, and not just because he dodged his attack.

His big mouth was a much bigger part of the equation. He seemed incapable of taking anything seriously.

"For both our sakes, I hope not," Nick said with a shiver. He wasn't thinking about any god or their angry retribution for his less than stellar faith. No, he was far more afraid of his other maker. Namely, his dad.

If he was here, seeing how beat up Nick had been getting since coming here… yeah, that wouldn't be pretty. Especially if he got whatever power boost going to an anime world gives you.

As for the other half responsible for his creation, his mother, Nick had no idea who she was. His father never spoke about her and there were no pictures of her in the house. Nick suspected he was adopted but his dad claimed he came from his loins.

But if she fell for a guy like his old man, she was either a lunatic or a mafia boss. There were no other explanations. Hell, it was probably both. That would explain some of Nick's personality traits.

He was distracted from his thoughts by Buchi suddenly charging at him, screaming, "Don't ignore me!" Shit, was he talking or something? Because Nick was in his own little world. Guess he took offense to that. Talk about a needy personality. He might as well have yelled out, "Notice me Senpai!"

It was just plain creepy.

However needy the man might have been, or how large, he was fast. Add in the lack of light in the hall made avoiding his attacks more difficult than it needed to be. But Nick was able to keep ahead of them, if only just barely. Right now he was floating like a butterfly.

Until it was time to sting like a bee.

Dodging to the left of one of Buchi's pointy fingers, Nick threw a heavy right cross directly into the spot he punched earlier. The punch wasn't nearly as strong, but it was enough to stagger the bigger man.

"Urk!" Buchi let out, as he took a few shaky steps backwards. He glared even harder at the other man, if that was possible. But his fury was truly ignited when Nick gave him a 'come here' gesture with his hand.

Letting out a roar he charged at Nick once more, his attacks going even faster than last time, his fury lending to his strength. This did, however, come with a dowside. While it's true his attacks were even faster than before, they were also more predictable, meaning they weren't any harder to dodge. Not really.

Eventually, Nick was able to grab both of his wrists, holding him firmly in his grasp. "That all you got?" he asked with a cocky smirk. Buchi looked ready to remove Nick's entrails and wear them as a scarf, but a sudden memory flashed through his head. A certain swordsman said something earlier, and it gave the cat themed pirate an idea.

"How about this!" he yelled, taking in a deep breath before releasing it in Nick's face. The worst part was, Nick had just opened his mouth to run it again.

"Oh god you do eat ass! Ugh, it's in my mouth! I think I'm going to be sick!" Nick yelled out in disgust, staggering away from Buchi while trying not to gag. Unfortunately, Nick wasn't paying attention to his surroundings, and didn't notice the flight of stairs right behind him.

Stairs leading down.

His right foot hit the ledge, and Nick had just enough time to give Buchi a surprised look before he went tumbling down the stairs.

"Ow! Fuck! Damn it! Son of a-!" These were just some of the curses Nick let out before he hit the bottom of the stairs. He could do nothing but lay there, as still as he could, wheezing in pain. The impact from the fall had driven the air from his lungs.

"Fuuuuck, my back. No one ever told me falling down stairs hurt so damn much," Nick thought to himself. Or maybe it was because he landed on his wounds. He was pretty sure he could feel some more blood on his back, so his injury from the other cat bastard must have opened up.

Isn't that just great?

"Don't tell me you're dead already! But we've only just started to play!" shouted Buchi, having sauntered his way to the edge of the stair, peering down into the dark abyss with glee shimmering in his eyes.

"Screw… You…" Nick croaked out. Hearing his voice brought a sadistic smile to Buchi's face. "Oh good, you're alive! That means we can continue to make art together!"

Nick wanted to say something witty but his brain was busy processing the torture his back was in. "I must have tweaked it when I fell. Isn't that just great?" he thought to himself sarcastically.

But his ears twitched as they caught a noise. It was barely within hearing range, but here, within the darkness, he had little else to do but listen. Because he couldn't see shit. The second floor of the ship had zero light. Not even a glimmer from a window.

That would make fighting that sadistic cat even harder. But what else could he do? Go back to Zoro like a sniveling little bitch? "Zoro, I'm sorry I couldn't get your swords back, but it was just so dark and scary! Please forgive me!"

No, fuck that! Nick wouldn't put himself through that humiliation. If Batman could beat up assholes in the dark, so could he. So what if Batman was trained as an assassin, had millions of dollars worth of gadgets, and was a certifiable genius. Nick had something Bruce didn't have.

The fervent desire to avoid seeing Zoro's smug ass face if he didn't come back with his swords. Worse if he ran to him for help. And that was better than any amount of training, money, or intelligence.

And no, he wasn't coping.

As Nick forced his way to his hands and knees, his ears picked up that sound again. It was a creaking sound, like someone walking along an old wooden floor. Exactly the sound he made while walking through this ship.

And it was getting closer. Nick's eyes widened with realization, and rolled out of the way, just as an overweight cosplayer landed right where he was, claws extended into the floor. If he hadn't gotten out of the way in time, he would have a few new piercings to disinfect.

And no shady mall employee to blame. Just a freak in a cat costume. He really hoped his next opponent was not dressed like a furry weirdo. Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, but three times is a pattern, and Nick would like to avoid this becoming the norm.

"Aw, why did you get out of the way? You would have made such lovely screams if only you'd stay still," Buchi whined, eyes turning to look at the pained form of Nick struggling to pick himself up off the ground.

"Sorry pal, the only ones who get to hear my screams are the ladies, and though you have some pretty big tits, you're just not my type. So please stop hitting on me," Nick snarked through grit teeth as he reached a standing position, one hand on the wall for support.

"...I'm going to enjoy using you as a scratching post," Buchi said, eyes filled with rage as he stalked toward his next victim. Luckily Nick was able to hear him even if he couldn't really see him. He mostly looked like a slightly darker mass of dark.

The mass of black shifted and a loud creak groaned out. Nick ducked out of reflex, and a good thing two. A meaty clawed hand passed through where his head just was, digging into the wall.

Taking a chance, Nick threw a left hook into the center of the mass. He would have preferred aiming for a vital spot, such as the liver, but he couldn't make out just where that would be, so instead he settled for just smacking the bitch as hard as he could.

But with the pain in his back, he wasn't able to generate as much force as he wanted. It was better than nothing, but a far cry from his best.

Nick was rewarded for his effort with a grunt of pain, before releasing one of his own. Buchi didn't just stand there and take it, sending a surprise backhand Nick's way, connecting with his jaw, the surprise of the blow sending him back to the floor.

Grabbing his jaw in pain, Nick began to move it back and forth, making sure it wasn't broken. To his relief, it felt relatively fine. Throbbing, but otherwise intact. Man that cat can hit hard when he wants to.

Looking up, he saw the shadowy figure shift its weight and knew another attack was coming. He needed to distract the lump before he could do so, the question is how? Seeing the small amount of light wafting down the staircase from the floor above gave Nick an idea.

He would just have to use the oldest trick in the book. Hopefully, Buchi was dumb enough to fall for it. He certainly looked like he was. Time to find out.

"Hey Zoro!" Nick shouted in joy, putting his considerable acting skills to work. The ones that made him a tree in his middle school play, because hearing him perform made the teacher's ears bleed. He was just unappreciated in his time, that's all.

Regardless of how great an actor Nick thought he was, it was good enough to fool Buchi. "Impossible! He can't be here!" Buchi shouted in alarm, and Nick saw his penumbral form shift, meaning he must be looking behind him now.

Perfect, that gave him the chance to use a forbidden technique, frowned upon in the boxing world. Except for matches in the underground, of course, where it was applauded.

Jumping to his feet and ignoring the spike of agony in his back, he searched for what looked like Buchi's head. He had a good idea where it was, but he was far from certain. His next attack would involve some amount of luck then.

Knowing time was of the essence, Nick leapt towards his opponent. As stupid as he was, even he would realize there was no green haired swordsman behind him, and that he'd been tricked. So before that happens, Nick unleashed a devastating blow to the back of his head.

"Jackrabbit's Fist!" Nick shouted, as he bashed Buchi's skull in. The larger man's eye bulged outward as he was sent flying forward, bouncing along the floor before landing still.

As Nick was coming back to the ground, his foot landed on something, sending his tumbling to the floor as well. "Oof! Damn it, what did I trip on this time?" he grouched, hands bumbling around in the dark until he discovered the cause of his misfortune.

The screwdriver. Because of course it was. Nick let out an irritated huff before he turned to look at Buchi, laying there unmoving. He slowly stood up before making his way to the other man, admiring his handiwork.

The Jackrabbit's Fist was a stronger variation of the rabbit punch, an illegal move in most civilized sports. It was nothing more than a blow to the back of the head, named for the way you would kill a rabbit without damaging the fur.

The reason it was illegal in most sports is because of the possible injuries it could cause to the spinal column. There were some cases of it actually killing someone as well. Normally, a rabbit punch was rather quick, but his technique put his whole body into it.

It was meant as a killing technique. Something his dad came up with for street fights. Nick had only ever been forced to use it once before now, and it ended up with the other guy dying. It was ruled self defense, but Nick had always been wary of using it since.

But Buchi? He deserved whatever he got.

Nick stared down at his hand, shaking it to try and remove the pain. "Damn you have a hard head," he complained. It wasn't enough that his back and jaw hurt, but now his fist did as well? Life wasn't fair sometimes.

Well, no use griping about it, at least not without an audience to annoy. Time to finish the task he came here to do. "I'll just take those…" Nick said, pocketing the screwdriver before kneeling down to remove the stolen blades from the back of Buchi's pants.

Which was more than a bit uncomfortable, considering he couldn't see all that well, meaning he might have accidentally copped a feel or two. Not that he wanted to, least of all with an unconscious, obese man, but the swords were in his belt right by his fat ass.

He was practically inviting him to play a game of grab ass! But why was it all lumpy? Dude should probably see a doctor…

Having accomplished his mission, Nick stood up, ready to depart, heading towards the only bit of light he could see, that being from the stairs. But of course, nothing is allowed to be simple.

Just as he passed the knocked out form of Buchi, something gripped his leg, causing his face to meet the floor, the impact causing him to lose his grip on one of the swords. "Ah, fuck! What the hell?" Nick moaned, holding onto his now bloody nose.

Looking back, trying to see what had grabbed him through the gloom, he could barely make out the form of Buchi, who was apparently not as unconscious as he thought. "Damn it! What's your problem asshole!? Just take the L already!" Nick yelled in frustration.

But he was ignored entirely, and felt himself being dragged toward Buchi. "Hey! What the hell do you think your-ah, fuck!" he yelled again, this time because of the stabbing pain in his calf.

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A pain caused by Buchi deciding it was fair game to take a bite out of Nick. Staring at him in shock, Nick couldn't believe he would stoop so low. Though in retrospect, it shouldn't have surprised him at all. Dude was dressed as a cat after all, and cats bite.

"Let go of me you dirty bitch! I don't know where your mouth has been!" Nick yelled, as he began to kick Buchi in the face with his other leg. Once, twice, three times his foot bounced off the other man's fat head, but it did little to deter him from his continued gnawing on Nick's shinbone.

"What's your problem, huh? Just let go already! What are you, a damn zombie!?" Nick shouted, giving him another kick to the face. Because that would be how this day went, with Nick starting the zombie apocalypse by punching some cat obsessed weirdo in the back of the head.

Honestly, if it was that easy, the Umbrella Corporation tried way too hard. Plants and viruses and parasites… none of that mattered! Just punch a dude, and bam! Zombie!

But wait… if he really was a zombie, and he just took a bite out of Nick… then that means… Nick was about to become a zombie!

Oh the inhumanity! He couldn't become a member of the undead, not until after he seduced a certain ginger haired girl! He wanted to eat her, but not in that way!

But in all seriousness, his leg fucking hurt. It was like getting stabbed all over again, which made sense considering those massive canines Buchi shoved into his face. Nick was convinced they were fake, but that didn't matter much when they were going through your leg.

Real or not, they hurt!

"Alright, that's it! No more Mr. Nice Guy!" Nick proclaimed, preparing to draw one of Zoro's blades from the confines of its sheath. If kicks didn't work, then maybe a good stabbing would. He hoped the angry green haired man wouldn't mind.

Now he just needed to make sure he got him in the head, because everyone knows a zombie's weakness is the head. Nick's weakness was his other head, but that's not important right now.

However, it seemed like Buchi recognized the danger he was in, because he immediately released Nick from his entrapment. But the brown haired boxer didn't have time to feel relieved, as Buchi immediately lept for him.

"Woah!" Nick grunted, bringing the still sheathed blade up in time. He used it to block the Black Cat Pirate from taking a chunk out of his throat this time by shoving it in his mouth. "You've got to be kidding me…" Nick ground out, struggling to keep the fat man at bay as he slobbered and bit down on the sheath, trying to get to Nick.

Who didn't understand this change in behavior. He couldn't really be a zombie, could he? He was acting like one, but that should be impossible, right?

Nick winced as a drool from the slobbering madman landed on his face. "Ugh, gross…" he complained. But the drool was only part of the problem, as he could smell the other man's breath more clearly than ever. It was making it harder and harder to resist the force Buchi exerted as he pushed down on the blade.

As he did so, Nick was able to finally understand what was going on. It wasn't that Buchi was a zombie, it was more like he became a rabid animal. "You're not actually conscious right now, are you?" Nick asked, as he stared into the whites of Buchi's eyes.

Eyes that held no conscious will to them. It was clear that Buchi was running on pure instinct at this point, and that might have made him even more dangerous. What little mind Buchi may have possessed gave way to an animalistic savagery.

Damn… looks like his earlier attack backfired something fierce. Instead of killing him or just knocking him out, it released his inner beast. Wasn't that just perfect? Well, there was only one thing to do with a rabid animal…

Put it down.

"You want to bite me that bad huh? Well two can play at that game," Nick said, giving his own savage smirk before opening his mouth and chomping down on Buchi's nose. He may not have had the sharp teeth of his enemy, but it was more than enough to cause a significant amount of pain to him.

Luckily for Buchi, with Nick's jaw in pain from getting backhanded earlier, he wasn't able to bite off his nose. But that didn't matter. The damage was enough to force Buchi to cease his attempts at Nick's throat.

Letting out a howl of pain, Buchi swung his head back while standing up, trying to get away from whatever was causing his torment. Relief washed over Nick as the mad cat stepped away from him. His breathing was erratic as he tried to catch his breath.

"That was too close…" Nick thought. Fighting someone without the capacity to think wasn't as easy as you might believe. It was almost impossible to predict what they would do. But it did provide opportunities.

A person with intelligence and any fighting experience at all should know what a bad idea it is to turn your back on an opponent. A beast might not think about it. Case and point, the rabid Buchi facing away from him, holding his nose in pain.

Nick couldn't see that's what he was doing, not really, but he somehow knew all the same. This was a chance he couldn't pass up. Standing up, and nearly falling over due to his bum leg, he limped towards Buchi with a determined gait.

Taking Zoro's sword in hand, Nick jumped up using his good leg, and wrapped the sheathed blade around Buchi's neck, trying to strangle him. The man let out a surprised yelp, and immediately began thrashing around. But Nick was not so easily deterred, and kept his grip firm.

Gagging, choking sounds could be heard echoing through the empty ship as Buchi tried to remove the object from his throat. His hands went to the sword, but no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to loosen his opponent's grip.

"Just die already!" Nick yelled, sweat dripping down his brow at the effort used to keep choking the life out of the cat pirate. But Buchi wasn't keen on staying still as he flailed about, trying to remove Nick from his back.

During this flailing, Buchi managed to ram Nick into the wall of the ship, making him gasp in pain. His back was already two kinds of fucked up, he didn't need a third. But his pained squawk seemed to encourage the rampaging beast, as he began to slam him against the wall repeatedly.

"Gah! Will you cut that out already!" Nick demanded, as his back flared in agony. He should have been careful what he wished for, because you just might get it.

Seeing that his tactic wasn't working, Buchi began to bash the back of his head into Nick's face, over and over again. It was so much worse than his back getting rammed into a wall.

After several of these bashes, Nick's grip finally relented. His own consciousness fading in and out as he started to slide down the wall. But good old mad Buchi wasn't willing to let bygones be bygones.

Oh no, far from it in fact. He was pissed beyond reason. Not that he had any reason left at this point, but whatever miniscule amount he still possessed was gone. He turned around and smashed his hand against Nick's face, holding him in place against the wall.

That stunt brought Nick back to full consciousness as he grabbed the offending arm and tried to remove it. He also tried calling Buchi's mother a slew of words that shouldn't be repeated in polite company. Or any company really. But with Buchi's hand on his face, all it sounded like was…

"Grf, gufm amgr revug nama sha gaba wa urg," and other assorted nonsense. Even if he didn't know what he was saying, Buchi could gather it wasn't anything pleasant, and that seemed to make him even angrier. It shouldn't have been possible, but what can you do?

Wanting to silence the yappy, flailing man in his grip, Buchi surged forth and bit into Nick's shoulder, causing blood to squirt out in every direction. Nick screamed in pain again, and his hands went from Buchi's arm to his face, trying to pry the lunatic off of him.

But he didn't have the leverage, and the fat feline's canines made it impossible to pull him off. Buchi bit down even harder, relishing the new screams his opponent was making.

Nick knew he had to get the crazed cat off of him, but no matter what he tried he couldn't get his disgusting mouth off of him. This was not the kind of hickey he wanted! But there had to be something he could do! He needed to think of something, and fast. Not only was he losing a good deal of blood, but the hand on his face made it impossible to breathe.

Looking down at the psycho biting him, Nick was reminded of his eyes. Pure white, without a shred of awareness. Just a beast of pure instinct. But thinking of those eyes gave him an idea.

He jammed his thumb into Buchi's eye as hard as he could, ripping the sensory organ from the man's skull, the feeling of doing so made him feel squeamish. It was just so… squishy. Or maybe that was the lack of blood. Either way, the newest bout of pain forced Buchi to shriek and pull back, letting Nick fall to the floor on wobbly feet, taking deep breaths of precious oxygen.

"Damn it that hurt! Why didn't I just stab the bitch from behind? I had a sword for christ's sake! The hell is wrong with me?" Nick chastised himself. He could say it had something to do with honor, a fair fight, or blah blah blah; but that would be a bold face lie. The truth is, he just didn't think of it at the time.

Hard to imagine that not even a minute before that he planned to stab Buchi in the face. Weird how that concept just flew out of his mind.

But now was not the time for self reflection. It was time for some revenge. Hobbling toward the now one eyed cat, Nick called out to him, "Hey, Bitchy!"

Buchi turned toward the sound of the shout, face set in the definition of rage as he growled at Nick. But he was unperturbed by the implied threat, feeling pretty dang angry himself.

Seeing his opponent walking towards him, Buchi released a swipe of his claws, but Nick was able to duck underneath it. He couldn't see that attack, not really, but something told him to dodge, so he did so.

He then tossed Buchi's eye into his face, making the large, angry feline flinch back. Because who wouldn't flinch when someone throws an eyeball at your face? Especially when it as your own

Knowing his opponent was distracted, Nick twisted his body and pulled his arm back, bending his legs as he prepared to unleash his own attack. This one he was certain would finish the fight. "Time to end this! Rising Dragon!"

After shouting his attack name like the weeb he is, Nick let loose a devastating uppercut, the sound of his fist hitting Buchi's jaw sounding like the roar of a dragon. The large man's fake canines shattered, along with most of his other teeth, flying out of his mouth as he soared into the air. He hit the ground with a dull thud before lying still.

Nick stood there, panting. "Finally… it's over…"

The fight was far longer and more arduous than he thought, but he won. Put that big fucker in his place and got vengeance for the people he killed. Now all that was left was to gather the swords and get the hell out of here.

Actually, there was one thing he had left to do. Looking at the unconscious form of Buchi, Nick couldn't take the chance of him going around, hurting more innocent people. It was best to make sure he was put down for good.

And here, in the dark, seemed like the perfect place to do so.

This time, he remembered the stabbing ability of a sword. He made his way over to where he assumed they were. It might take a bit of time to find in the dark, but he would manage.

But of course, things were never so simple. As he walked past Buchi, he was once again, grabbed by a hand, face planting into the floor.

"Gah! Again! Bitchy, you're really overstaying your welcome!" Nick yelled, looking back at the now fully conscious Black Cat Pirate. How was he still going? Did his punch knock the consciousness back into him? How was that even possible?

"We're not… done here…" Buchi wheezed out, his words slurred due to his likely broken jaw and shattered teeth. He wasn't sure what had happened. The last thing he remembered was turning around and looking for Zoro, then there was a massive pain in the back of his skull, and after that… nothing.

But he ached. Oh how he hurt. His nose was throbbing, his head was pounding, his jaw was aching; but worst of all was his eye. The pain centered there felt like he had been stabbed by a knife and then someone poured lemon juice into the wound. But not only did it feel agonizing, he also couldn't see out of it!

"What did you do to me!?" Buchi yelled with a terrified anger. Nick was confused. Did he not remember what happened?

"Me? You're the one who started this fight. You did this to yourself," Nick responded, giving him his best condescending smirk. It must have worked, because Buchi let out another angry bellow.

"That's it! I'm sick of you! I'm going to kill you! Then I'm going to kill that swordsman! Then I'll kill every single person on this island! Do you hear me!"

Nick wasn't sure what to say in response to the madness Buchi was displaying. He could try to de-escalate things, but he doubted that would work anyway. So he reacted to the tried and true method of being a smartass.

"I'm sorry. Did you say something?"

Good old Kakashi. Never a more sure fire way to annoy somebody than to emulate him. One of the only reasons he bothered to watch Naruto, because the main character was just the worst.

Learn a Jutsu you asshole!

"Ragh!" Buchi shouted in unbelievable rage. Seriously, Nick couldn't believe he was this angry. After all, Nick was the one who had to deal with him. If anything, he should be the one who's the most angry.

Buch stood up, bringing Nick with him, leaving his head pressing against the floor at an awkward angle. "Hey, the hell do you think your-" But Nick's tirade was cut short as Buchi swung him through the air.

"Oh shit!" Nick yelped as he was sent careening towards the wall. There was nothing he could do but brace himself as he slammed against the wall, going straight through it. He rolled across the ground before finally coming to a stop when he hit the outside wall.

"Why is alway the back?" Nick groaned out, pain flaring up through his body at every little move he made. He coughed violently as dust tickled his throat, causing even more pain to shoot through his body.

He forced himself to a sitting position, leaning back against the wall he just slammed into. He tried to see where he just came from, but the area was even darker than the hall. You'd think a room would have a window, but nooo, that would be too much to ask for.

Unfortunately, Nick didn't have time to sit around and bitch. A tingling shot up his spine and every instinct he had screamed at him to move. So that's what he did, rolling to the left. He could feel a slight stinging in his cheek as a small scratch revealed itself, dripping blood. A loud crash from his previous spot alerted him to the danger.

And of course that danger was Buchi. The large man pulled his arm out of the wall, a small stream of moonlight illuminating his battered form. He turned, slowly and deliberately, to level a hate filled glare at Nick.

Something that Nick was actually able to see thanks to the hole in that wall. And that gave him an idea.

"Now Bitchy, the ship is not your eating disorder," Nick mocked, only to receive a growl in response. He really wasn't that much different from his feral state. Nick wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

Buchi tried to claw Nick's face again, only for Nick to stumble out of the way, but only just barely. With his leg the way it was, it made dodging harder than he thought. Maybe pissing off the cat wasn't the best idea?

…Nah!

Thankfully, Buchi wasn't in much better shape, his whole body screaming at him. And with his depth perception thrown off from his missing eye, Nick was able to stay ahead of his attacks by the thinnest of margins.

Or at least most of them. Grunting in pain as a fresh wound appeared on his chest, Nick gave an angry glare at his opponent. It wasn't super deep, but it still stung like a bitch.

"I'm getting real sick of those claws," he grumbled, holding his chest.

"Well I'm pretty darn sick of your mouth!" Buchi responded, making Nick roll his eyes. It wasn't his fault he was such a smartass, it was society's. People just made it too easy to mock them.

The two of them continued their deadly dance, each one landing a few hits here and there, but no one able to land a decisive blow. But much to Buchi's growing frustration, Nick was able to escape his well deserved death with an ever growing efficiency.

"Why!? Why can't I hit you!?" Buchi yelled in frustration as Nick avoided another of his attacks. Nick gave him an I know something you don't know look. It drove the cat mad.

"You're not very observant, are you?" Nick asked.

"Huh?" Buchi responded. Observant? What was there to observe? They were in a dimly lit room with nothing inside of it. What could he possibly-

That's when it hit him. The room was dimly lit. Before it was completely dark. Looking around in panic, Buchi finally noticed all the holes in the wall, each one letting in just a bit more light than before.

His eyes widened at the realization of what happened. While they were fighting, Nick kept close to the wall, so when one of them missed, it would create a new opening. Thinking back on it even more, it seemed like Nick missed on purpose several times, just to strike at the wall.

So that's why Nick was able to dodge all of his attacks. He could see Buchi now! He made his own window! No longer did the cat themed pirate have the advantage due to the dark. Actually, it was even worse because he was missing an eye.

Giving the darkly grinning man a fearful look, Buchi took a step back, as sweat began to drip down his back. Nick's grin grew even wider at seeing the fear in his opponent's eyes.

"What's wrong Bitchy? Scared?" he taunted.

"Of you? Not a chance!" Buchi returned, rushing toward Nick again. He swung his claw at his throat once more, hoping to get lucky and rip it out. But alas, it was not to be, as Nick ducked under it, and delivered a brutal punch to his stomach.

"Hurk!" Buchi yelled, trying to hold in his lunch. But Nick wasn't about to let up. Now that he had the advantage, it was time to press it. He began to rain blow after blow against Buchi's increasingly fragile person. He kept at it, pummeling Buchi black and blue, till the other man was barely standing.

Buchi, fearing for his life more than he ever has before, pulled out a desperate move. Seeing Nick's left hand coming towards his face, Buchi opened his mouth and bit down.

"Ah, not the fucking teeth again!" Nick yelled. Even though most of his teeth were in pieces, and those two large canines were lying somewhere on the floor of the ship, they still hurt. Each one sharp and pointy, like dozens of little needles piercing his flesh.

With his hand in Buchi's mouth, the larger man grabbed Nick by the throat, twisted his body, and slammed him against the wall. The one with all his precious holes in it. But he wasn't done there, far from it. He thrust his left hand out, all four claws penetrating into Nick's stomach.

"Guh!" Nick yelled, throwing up a bit of blood as he did so. Fuck that hurt, and Buchi wasn't letting up on the pressure at all, using it to keep him pinned to the wall. He tried grabbing onto the hand, tried to pull it out, but just like the last time he was forced against the wall by the other man, he wasn't able to overcome his strength.

"Damn it… You bastard," Nick muttered, staring daggers into Buchi's one eye.

"Aw, what's wrong? Does it hurt? You're not afraid are you?" Buchi asked, twisting and grinding his fist deeper into Nick's stomach, who could only barely hold back a scream. Why did every pirate he meets want to torture him?

"Well don't you worry, because it will all be over soon," Buchi assured, only to receive a glob of blood and spit in his face for his troubles. Growling in anger, he headbutted Nick in the face, whose limbs fell limply to his side.

Seeing the dazed look in his opponent's eyes, Buchi felt assured of his victory, even as Nick glared through the haze as best he could. For a second there he was worried. But now the tables were turned, and it was time to exact sweet, sweet revenge for all the trouble he caused.

Removing his hand from Nick's throat, who coughed in response, sucking in air like a vacuum, Buchi drew it back, intending to send it right through the smug bastard's face.

"Any last words?" Buchi asked condescendingly. Not that he actually cared what he had to say, it was just a bit of mocking courtesy.

Nick was about to tell him to go fuck himself, when his hand brushed against something long and hard in his pocket. Thinking it was a weird time to pop a boner, Nick fondled it, wondering what it was. As his fingers trailed over every inch of it, he realized it was the screwdriver.

Eyes widening in recognition, his mind came up with one final plan. If it didn't work, he was probably going to die, so… fingers crossed.

"Yeah… I got something to say," Nick said slowly, as he removed the screwdriver from his pocket, holding it firmly in his hand.

"Oh, and what would that be?" Buchi continued to mock, believing there was nothing left that Nick could do.

Putting on his best, fuck you smirk, Nick gave Buchi his last words. Or at least, the last one's Buchi would ever hear.

"You should have gone for the head."

Buchi was confused for a moment, but only for a moment, as he suddenly had a screwdriver going through his ear and into his brain. He stood there, his body not comprehending what just happened, staring at Nick with eyes full of shock.

Eyes that slowly dimmed into nothingness, Nick never dropping eye contact until the life was fully drained from them. Afterwards, he was finally able to remove Buchi's hand from his stomach, as the Black Cat Pirate collapsed onto the floor, screwdriver stuck in his head like a Frankenstein monster reject.

Nick leaned back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling and holding his stomach in pain. This time it was over for sure. No way in hell he was getting up after that.

"That was for Pett, asshole," Nick said, gazing at Buchi's unmoving body. Feeling a nice breeze against his flushed skin, Nick closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling, before realizing where it came from.

"...Hope he won't be too upset about that," Nick mumbled. Well, if the old guy was angry about the holes, he would just blame the corpse. Not like he could defend himself.

"Alright. Time to get out of here," Nick said to himself, limping toward the exit. Hopefully Zoro had an easier time of things than he did. Actually, no, he hoped he had it just as rough. Nick wouldn't hear the end of it if Zoro still looked all prim and proper after his battle and Nick showed up with more blood on the outside of his body than the inside.

He left the moonlit room without a second glance.

Battle for Syrup Village!

Nick vs Buchi

Winner: Nick

It took him longer than he would like to admit to find the swords again, and an embarrassingly long time to climb the stairs. But once he did, he was free and clear to hobble his way right out of there.

Standing at the entrance of the ship, Nick looked out to see how the battle went. To his relief, he saw Zoro pulling at the nail trapping Pett to the mast. "Good, that must mean he defeated Sham," he thought, stepping out onto the deck.

Zoro finally managed to get the nail out, Pett's arms dropping as a result. The motion made him gurgle in pain. "Sorry about that," Zoro apologized. He then took his sword out to cut the ropes, when the sound of a creaking board drew his attention. Turning his head, he saw the form of Nick walking towards him.

Or more like, limping. At least he had his swords.

"Geez, what happened to you?" Zoro asked, taking note of the other man's injuries. There were some nasty looking punctures on his shoulder and calf, as well as several cuts along his body, and his nose looked pretty busted up too.

"Oh you know, had to put down a feral cat. Fell down some stairs. What about you?" Nick asked as he neared his sword wielding friend, noticing him wince slightly when he mentioned falling down stairs. Must have something to do with Kuina. Did she fall down them in this timeline as well?

Zoro himself was sporting several deep cuts of his own, all over his body. All except his back of course. "Take a look for yourself," he said, indicating where to look by cocking his head. Doing so, Nick was greeted to the sight of Sham, bifurcated through the middle.

"I see…" Nick muttered. It was a pretty gruesome sight, not that he could say much about it. Not after shoving a screwdriver into a man's skull.

"Anyway, my swords," Zoro demanded, holding his hand out. Nick rolled his eyes at his demanding tone, but handed them over all the same.

"What, no thank you?" he snarked.

"Thanks. Happy?" Zoro asked sarcastically, making Nick grin. "Ecstatic."

Zoro rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything more on the subject. His swords were back, he would leave it at that. Instead, he brought attention towards a man tied to the mast. "Great. Now, mind helping me with him?"

Nick's eyes widened, looking at Pett as if seeing him for the first time, "Oh, shit. Right, hang on," he said, moving to the side of him.

"Ready?" Zoro asked, as Nick positioned himself to catch the dying man.

"Ready," he confirmed. Giving a nod, Zoro proceeded to cut the rope, with Nick making sure the older man didn't face plant. He knew how that felt, and it didn't feel good. He gently placed the man on the ground, checking over his injuries. He may not have been a doctor, but he knew basic first aid.

Nick cut off several lengths of cloth from his shirt and used them to wrap around Pett's appendages to staunch the blood flow. Next he tied them around the worst of the wounds themselves to do the same. It was a patchwork job, but it was the best he could do.

"Alright, I'm done. Now we just need to get him to a real doctor," Nick said, wiping a bit of sweat off his brow. Treating the injured while injured yourself is no easy task. But his wounds have mostly stopped bleeding by now, and he didn't feel faint, so he assumed he would be fine.

"Didn't know you knew fist aid," Zoro commented, sounding genuinely impressed.

"Just something I picked up. No big deal," Nick responded, shrugging his shoulders. Sure it was a nice skill to have but he didn't think it was especially impressive. But then, a stray thought crossed his mind.

"Hey, you don't think Kaya is going to make us pay for these clothes, do you?"

Zoro raised an eyebrow, "No. Why would she do that?"

"I mean…" Nick said, trailing off and gesturing to the bloody and ripped forms of their clothes. Nick's was particularly bad, having torn great strips out of it, leaving him basically shirtless.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. Not everyone is as greedy as the Witch," Zoro grumbled back, and Nick didn't have to think about who the witch was. He knew exactly who he meant. But it wasn't worth the argument. After all, Zoro had no idea about Nami's background. So he let the matter drop, and turned his attention back towards Pett.

"Alright, you take one side and I'll take the other," Nick suggested, and Zoro nodded his head in agreement. The two of them then wrapped Pett's arms around their shoulders.

"Now, I'll count and we lift him up when I get to three, alright? Ok, here we go… One… Two… Three!" Nick said. When he got to three, the pair of them lifted Pett up as easy as lifting a sack of potatoes.

"Great, now let's get out of here. If we ran into trouble, chances are the others did too," Nick said.

"Still worrying?" Zoro questioned as the pair of them began to walk.

"After this? Yeah. Can you blame me?" Nick asked. No, he couldn't. Even Zoro was feeling a pang of concern. These guys were just the grunts. Disposable. Who knows what the rest of them are like. Especially the captain.

The two were about halfway to the exit when Zoro stopped and started sniffing the air, making a face as he did so. "Hey, you smell that?" he asked. Nick gave him a confused look, before taking a few big whiffs. But with his nose all battered and bruised, he couldn't smell a thing.

"Nope. What is it?" he asked, watching as Zoro kept sniffing like he was a bloodhound.

"I don't know… But I swear I've smelt it before…" he said, closing his eyes to focus on the scent. After a few more big inhales, his eyes snapped open.

"Shit! It's gas!"

Now it was Nick's turn to widen his eyes. What the hell was gas doing here? More importantly, why was it here? He could only think of one reason, and if he was right…

"We need to move, now!" Nick commanded. Agreeing with his companion, having come to the same conclusion, the two began to walk again, faster than last time. But a new noise caught their attention.

It sounded like something flying, mixed in with the sound of someone farting. The two of them looked up to see a new figure land in the crow's nest, dressed in one of the weirdest outfits they had ever seen.

Most of him was covered by a fur suit of some kind, with an olive green jacket underneath and what looked like pink shorts on his legs. On his head was an aviator helmet with similar sunglasses resting on top. A large nose protruded proudly from his face, and he wore a massive grin on his face. But the weirdest part was the massive pink heart right on his crotch.

"Good evening, gentlemen," he greeted happily.

"And just who the hell are you supposed to be?" demanded Zoro, glaring up at the man. If anything, his question made the man's grin widen.

"So sorry, no time for lengthy introductions today. But seeing as you are about to die, just know that you were killed by Skunk One," he replied.

"Really? Did your mother choose that name?" Nick asked sarcastically. He stared up at the goofy looking man, trying to place him, but he couldn't do it. He had no idea who he was.

"I was told you were the mouthy one. Guess he was right," Skunk One responded, not fazed by Nick's mockery in the slightest, making him pout.

"And who the hell is he?" Zoro asked.

"Wouldn't you like to know," Skunk One responded nonchalantly.

"Bastard," Zoro growled at the man, but it did little to bother the man.

"Anyway, it was nice meeting you gentleman but I'm afraid I'm on a schedule. So sorry, but it's time for you to die," he said, while pulling out a round object with a fuse on it. The duo's eyes widened at seeing it.

"Shit," they both said. Giving them one last grin, the man dressed like the offspring of a flying squirrel and a skunk lit the fuse.

"Tata," he mocked, before dropping the bomb and flying off, propelling himself by what sounded like farts, thick green gas flying out of a spout right under his ass. But there was no time to worry about that now, no matter how weird or stupid it was.

The two of them ran as fast as they could while carrying Pett, heading towards the edge of the ship, the sound of the fuse spurring them on. But eventually, the fuse ran out.

The sound of the resulting explosion would wake up the entire island.