I woke up in bed. Mildred wasn’t around so I sat up slowly and pain shot through my stiff body. I got up slowly. The white cotton clothes that I was in shifted smoothly across my skin. I began to go through a series of stretches loosening up my muscles. I was careful whenever the stretches pulled at the stitches that were on my stomach. I took the pitcher of water and poured myself another glass to quench my thirst. I didn’t want to risk reverting my insides away from the dragon in me. I was glad I had spent so long mastering shapeshifting.

I saw a book about foreign stories still in my room. I don’t remember if I had meant to return it or not. I had some time so I picked it up and sat on the edge of the bed. It was too dark in the room for me to do much work so I set it down and searched for the lamp that was set in here. The match beside it was ready so I struck it up and bathed the room in light.

I picked up the book. I had long wished that if I read stories other people knew that I would gain power from it but it only seemed to help after I told it for the first time. I didn’t think anyone would be interested in hearing about the far east. I relaxed and read about the ‘barbaric’ ways of the east. The rampant xenophobia in humanity since the dawn of time did not help.

Observations from a Merchant traveling through the east

I came upon a somewhat large city, their lack of defensive walls showed how trusting or weak the nation saw itself. The guards didn’t wear any armor either. It would be child’s play to take this town. If it weren’t for the desolate wasteland between out two nations I think it would have already happened. The men were much smaller than my own, thin lean half starved people walked about like hunger wasn’t rumbling in their bellies. Though my eye caught a brothel, something my men needed was a night of release from the pent up needs a man naturally develops. I planned to treat the guards I hired to a round of women as a thank you for their hard work. They hadn’t slain a few bandits for nothing.

The buildings here were strangely shaped. The roofs seemed to have a bending slope to them and ornate carvings on every corner protruded out. Open windows let in the morning air without the shutters that one would usually see in the west. Something was off though. Something missing in the air that I associated with thriving towns. It took me a few hours to realize that the streets were immaculately clean. What gutters for waste that existed seemed to have streams of clean water running through them, they were uncaked by the affluence of society.

The day went by quietly, the evening coming fast after I arranged stay for myself and set up a rotation of the guards to keep the wagons of supplies safe from thieves through the night. I brought those that weren’t on first duty to the brothel I had noted earlier. The room was filled with pillows, thin sheen curtains separated little booths and I could plainly see women riding men through them. Moans of delirious pleasure filled the room as I noticed my guards grow excited.

A fine mistress that was older and no less desirable than the women that walked behind her. Each graceful as dancers as they walked. Their curves on display through their silk robes. My skill with the native tongue helped me barter for my men throughout the night to pass around the same few women for a cheaper price. It was a hefty sum by the end but the mistress of the establishment took my arm and guided us to a private area.

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The spirits she gave me were much sweeter than I was used to and the pleasures she showed me that night were divine. My wife had never been so skilled or as adventurous as this eastern woman.

The story went on into details of his trades and how each of the cities seemed to be more similar than the uniqueness of our western world. He went into dry detail around anything that didn’t involve his growing desire for exotic women and the acts they were willing to do that prudes like his wife wouldn’t dare do.

I flipped the pages bored and then set it down. The whole book was a collection of when people first met the east and how they found the foreign civilization so alien in comparison to their homes. The word barbarian was used a copious amount and I found it grating.

Feeling cooped up I stood and dressed in the loose clothes that were left for me and donned the slippers that had been left in my room. I left and headed to the public study to look for more books to read while I recovered. I kept myself from limping as I used the lamp to light my way through the dark house. I was familiar enough with the home that I was soon in their public study. I set the lamp down and looked around, taking it in much more closely than when I had been talked to by the Duke Portage.

The zither I had played sat in the corner of the room. I looked at it and remembered my hands dancing on the strings before the attack. I looked down at my now missing fingers and sighed, I wanted to regrow them already but playing the wounded songbird was probably going to keep me alive. I started to sift through the books and wondered if I should find enough gold to pay some scribes to write my own tale down. I had never tried to see if my power would grow with someone reading my tales. Though to have things written now would cost me a fortune for anything more than a single copy.

I sat down with a book of songs and settled in for a relaxing time of study. Written songs were so different and could be interpreted in so many ways. I hummed to myself trying to find the cadence and tempo of the songs that were written. Tapping my fingers in my mind for the lute I was so familiar with. Time flew by and I was soon found by a servant doing their nightly rounds. It didn’t take much to shoo me away as I returned to the room with a book in hand. I set it down and slipped out a backdoor to walk the small yard the great house had.

The smell of fresh tilled dirt filled my nostrils as I looked around at all the recently planted flowers. The hedges were freshly trimmed by their gardener and I assessed his work. I’d never served as a gardener in my lives and wondered what it was truly like. To take such special care of a place and shape it to your own whims or the whims of others. I bent and sniffed flowers, a thousand memories of fields and wildflowers filling my mind. Then I found a bench underneath the moonlight and stared up into the stars. The windows of the house were dark except for a few flickerings of candles in some of the low basement windows.

The cool night air seeped through the cotton clothes and soon I found myself wanting to be wrapped in blankets again. Maybe my dreams of Sky Gazer would continue, the first love of my many lives. Someone that looked past the knowledge that I was an ancient being and knew me as both a dragon and the woman I wanted to be. I touched my stomach, I never knew if I liked being a man or woman more. There was so much unique in each one that to compare them was impossible. Mostly I picked based on the kind of life I could lead as one or the other.

Returning to my room I snuggled down in the bed and pulled up the book. The lamp was still strong and gave enough light for my windowless room for me to see. I opened the book and read about a life I hadn’t lived. It was a fable and not of anything of importance. More about the morality of ruling over a kingdom in a way that everyone prospered. Morals that nobles needed more and more these days.

I thought of the kingdom at large and how I had seen the beginnings of the fall the kingdom would suffer. Infighting brought weakness, war brought more, and this place had both. I pulled the blanket to my chest and read what it would be like to be a noble. I had never lived like that besides being the Khalif. That was such a different culture that it wouldn’t compare to the ways of these north western people.

I set the book down, exhausted from the night of walking. I was still so weak from the fever that had eaten away at me. I focused on the memories of the past and tried to will the time with my first love would come back.