When Ian returned home late that afternoon, another fresh kill slung over his shoulder, he couldn’t help the slight sigh as the shack came into view. Outside, Jared sat alone on the ground. His back was against the outer wall near the entrance to their home. There, he stared somberly down at the ground in front of his slightly bent knees that his elbows rested upon. He hadn’t even made any move to escape inside to avoid that unforgiving August sun beating down on him.
Ian simply tossed the animal to the ground near their fire pit, and moved to wash some blood from his hands in a nearby bowl of water, not bothering to offer any greeting, or even so much as another look toward Jared as the younger of them cleared his throat and looked up in response to Ian’s return.
“Something interesting happening in those blades of grass that you were staring so intently at or something?” Ian finally mumbled some form of acknowledgment of the other man’s presence at last, though he still didn’t look back his way.
“Just figured I’d come out here....” Jared began, though his voice trailed off before he changed his statement, “I think I can officially say that Lili really has no interest in speaking with me right now.”
“And I do?” Ian scoffed, still not turning back to look Jared’s way.
Jared let out a defeated sigh before speaking again, “I don’t know how many times I can say it; but I know Kyle survives this. I just wish I could make the two of you believe it too” he added more sadly.
Ian just shook his head, his anger at hearing that continued blind faith apparent still, “and what about Will? Can you say the same for him? Do you even care?” he bit back, only tossing Jared the slightest angry glance then.
Jared sighed as he too averted his eyes, “I haven’t seen any more visions of Will, but it goes to reason that if---”
“Fuck your reason” Ian interrupted with the same anger as he shoved the bowl away.
“Are you forgetting about my last vision? Do you even care that there may have been survivors?” Jared attempted to turn the question on Ian, though his voice lacked volume in the face of the other man’s continued anger.
Ian just glared back at him again, “I care about Lili, and our daughter. And for some fucked reason, Lili cares about Kyle, so don’t get me started on what I care about. What do you even care about Jared, really? Anything even?”
Jared shook his head back at him, “you know exactly how deeply I care about them too. That’s the whole reason---”
“And we’re back to your fucking reasons again” Ian growled the interruption as he looked away once more.
Jared took another long, frustrated breath before continuing, “just tell me, Ian, what can I say to make this better? To make the two of you stop hating me?”
“You could say that they’re both back, and they’re both safe, right here, in the real world, not in some vision. Can you do that?” Ian asked him smartly, already knowing that answer.
Another sad sigh from Jared then, “I could offer to try and make myself have another vision,” he swallowed briefly, trying not to think about his earlier conversation with Lili wherein he was forced to admit to what he would actually have to do to accomplish that, “but obviously my visions don’t seem to be enough to convince either of you anymore, do they?” he added sadly.
Ian didn’t even bother offering a response as he continued busying himself with anything he could to keep from speaking to, or even looking at, Jared right then. Though Jared also said nothing else, nor did he bother trying to remove himself from Ian’s presence. After all, the only other place he could go would be inside to see the other person who wanted nothing to do with him right then.
After a few more long moments of relegating himself to continuing to do nothing more than keep staring at the grass, Jared’s worry forced him to find his voice again, “well, since you already can’t get any angrier at me...” he began.
“Really now?” was Ian’s curt response, though he made no move to look back at the younger man, nor to say anything else just yet.
Jared took a deep breath, but forced himself to continue the sentence he had started, “I have to ask; during this last twenty-four hours you and Lili spent alone in your room together, did you end up having sex?”
That question was definitely enough to get Ian to turn around with a look of utter disbelief, “did you really just ask me that?” he shot back, his anger more than obvious.
Another heavy sigh, “I need to know.”
Ian let out another sound of disbelief, “do you now?” he returned, the sarcasm dripping off his voice.
Jared shook his head, eyes still downwards, but forced himself to continue, “if you did, there’s something she needs to take, now, before it gets any later” he stated, trying to keep his voice even, despite how much it pained him to think that Lili might have acted on her grief by doing something that he knew she wasn’t anywhere near ready for yet.
Ian’s anger was only slowed by a fraction at those words, as he had to ask, “what are you talking about?”
“So, you did?” Jared asked in a near whisper.
“Fuck you, answer my question first” Ian retorted, not backing down in any way.
Another sigh from the younger man, “I collected plants that I think may have the same active ingredients as what was in the morning-after, plan B, whatever you wanna call it, pill. She needs to take them if you did do that to...with her” he forced himself to correct the semi-Freudian slip.
This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.
Ian just shook his head, the disbelief continuing, “and why aren’t you in there askin Lili to share this vital information, doc?”
“I tried not to mention those plants to her at all, because I didn’t want her to feel like I...like any of us would put her on the spot like that, and expect that from her, especially this soon, after everything.”
“Oh but you think I would put her on the spot like that? Me? The one who already got her pregnant the first time?” Ian returned, obviously appalled. Though Ian’s response did somehow relieve Jared, as he doubted that would have been his reaction at all if he actually had made love to Lili again this soon.
“I just had to ask” Jared stated, almost apologetically, “since you obviously...” though when he looked up, he chose not to finish that thought.
“Since I obviously what?” Ian asked, not letting it go that easily.
Unhappy about the verbal hole he had managed to dig himself into, Jared sighed again before allowing himself to finish the sentence, “since you obviously wanted sex badly enough to...” he began, though he lost his voice before the end of that sentence as well.
Ian let out a derisive laugh, “to what?” he just had to press.
“You know what” Jared stated, though his voice was barely above a whisper at this point.
“To fuck Will?” Ian supplied, then couldn’t help adding, “multiple times.”
Jared just shook his head again, “to fuck a complete stranger, who...who you weren’t even sure we should trust at first” Jared attempted to offer some sort of defense.
Ian scoffed again “I must admit, ‘complete stranger’ is a pretty hilarious term on a planet with a population of six....” he then couldn’t help adding, “or I guess, a population of four, now” he corrected roughly. But at that point, Ian had finally had enough, and finally went back inside, away from any more of the verbal sparring that was getting them not one bit closer to fixing anything. Not that any of them were sure anything even could be fixed at this point.
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Once September began, at least the arguments between Jared and his companions had come to a halt. Then again, so had pretty much all the conversations between he and they as well. After all, the more days that ticked by with no sign of Kyle or Will safely returning to them, the more and more difficult it got for Jared to even know how to try to start any conversations with either Lili or Ian. When their eyes did manage to catch his from time to time, it was painfully obvious how little faith either of them could try and retain in the idea that Jared’s visions always came true; in the idea that Kyle would indeed be back with them again one day.
On that particular morning, Lili awoke from her normally fitful slumber next to where Ian still lay beside her fast asleep. She allowed a moment to let her eyes travel over him as he lay there, clad only in his underwear, and she in a simple t-shirt and panties due to the still hot temperatures making it difficult to get any rest at all while fully clothed.
Of course, that sleep apparel did make other things difficult too, like ignoring the attraction they had always had to one another. There had been more than one night of those last two weeks where they lay there kissing and cuddling and had to make a conscious effort to stop themselves from giving into the desire to do any more than just that. With each night they spent in one another’s arms, it got harder and harder to ignore those unfulfilled desires, despite how terrified they each were to give into them once more.
Lili sighed softly as she forced herself up from the bedding and slid into a pair of jeans that had been cut into shorts to get through the long summers without the air conditioning she had enjoyed for the previous two decades of her life on the ship. She slowly made her way from the bedroom to go and check on where here nearly two month old daughter continued to sleep contently, thankfully not having inherited her mother’s insomnia, just yet, anyway.
She then tossed another look back toward Ian’s doorway, and even Jared’s before heading outside to relieve herself and make an attempt at planning on how to get herself through yet another day. After all, her anxiety was still her constant companion, even if slightly more manageable these days then it had been right after Hope’s birth.
She once again found herself walking the riverbank in deep thought for several long minutes, before she stopped to get a drink as she squinted up at the morning sun. Lili sighed once more as she glanced back toward the shack that was still just barely visible in the distance. She then took a seat to pull off her worn hiking boots and slide her toes into the edge of the river.
As she sat there in silence, she couldn’t help thoughts of the kisses she shared with Ian the previous night. Those thoughts then easily gave way to memories of his touch, as well as Jared’s, and even Kyle’s as her breath caught a bit as she let all those memories come flooding back, feeling the wetness starting between her legs at the mere thought of the passion that used to be a nightly occurrence, in what almost seemed like another life now.
Casting one more glance back at the shack, she gave in and laid back, the clouds above reflecting in her turquoise eyes as she slowly reached down to slide her shorts and panties down her legs. She then closed her eyes and imagined each of her three former lovers as her hand moved downward to that wetness as she began giving herself all the pleasure that she hadn’t felt in so long.
Several minutes later, her second orgasm was very nearly upon her, when her motions were immediately halted by the sound of footsteps mere feet from where she had been laying there, lost in that passion. She sprang into a sitting position as her cheeks turned the same color as her hair, her head snapping around to discover who had intruded upon such a private moment. She swallowed painfully as her eyes came up to meet Jared’s, neither of them really able to find words right then.
Mortified, she quickly scrambled to reach for her shorts and pull them back up her legs, when he knelt next to her, his hand reaching out to cover her wrist, causing her to freeze at the touch.
“Believe me, Lili, I get it” he attempted a smile to comfort her, though, in that current situation, there wasn’t a whole lot of comfort to be had.
“Can we just pretend this never happened?” she whispered, her voice still raspy and breathless, due to more than one factor, as she pulled her knees to her chest and hid her face in her hands to cover the blush that was so red it nearly burnt her cheeks.
“We don’t have to” he whispered back, his hand still resting on her heated thigh above where she had only managed to pull her shorts and panties to her knees before his hand had reached out to stop her.
“What does that even mean?” she asked him with a shake of her head, her eyes barely managing to look his way again.
Jared looked down a moment, though he still wore a gentle smile when he looked back up to answer her, “let me help you” he stated as he moved nearer still and slowly, gently pulled her only half replaced clothing back down her legs as she looked on with more than a bit of shock, but somehow made no move to stop him.
Jared then just as gently guided her knees back down from her chest and moved to spread her legs once more. He moved closer still as he allowed himself to trace a few kisses upon first her knee, then her inner thigh, then higher as she couldn’t stop herself from laying back upon the ground once more. Her back arched as his mouth moved to that wetness, his lips and tongue moving against her, inside her, causing those tremors of her next climax to almost immediately start once more as she finally let herself give into that touch again after far too long.