The teleportation was quick. The moment he blinked was the moment he arrived on Earth with the Koncradam in one hand, but the tablet was missing. Icy winds brushed his skin and took him by surprise. He never expected to imagine Earth being so cold. Daylan’s eyes widened with wonder for how white and calm the world was, how the blue clear sky was compared to the red polluted air back in Hell. I’m free, I’m finally free! He thought to himself.

He turned around to see two armed figures. The man with the blond hair tied up in a ponytail approached Daylan after he puffed a cigar. Behind him was a person that looked strange to Daylan, though he couldn’t understand what it was. The kid couldn’t even notice the other soldiers hiding from him, ready to take him out if he did anything funny.

‘Hello, I’m Operator Irene and I want to give you a diplomatic welcome on behalf of Earth. Unfortunately, you have appeared on this planet through illegal means and I will need to ask you a few questions to determine if your unorthodox visit warrants deportation, execution, or asylum.’ Irene pulled out a notepad and flicked through a few pages.

‘Wait, deportation?’

‘We send you back to Hell.’ Irene explained, ‘yes I am aware the place sucks and yes every-now-n’-then demons will come here seeking to escape. But we have laws, and we have procedures, so you can’t just come here unless you have a really good reason to.’

‘And if I fail.’

‘We send you back to Hell, or we kill you. Really, it doesn’t make a difference.’ Irene put his cigar out in the snow. ‘First question: what brought you to Earth?’

‘I came to seek asylum.’ Daylan responded.

Irene sighed, he placed one hand into his earpiece and muffled something, but Daylan couldn’t hear what he said. ‘Asylum will require documentation; do you have any papers on you?’

‘What? No! Does it look like I have anything like that on me?’

Daylan watched as Irene crossed off a few boxes in his notepad. ‘Well, that’s a shame. This is going to be difficult to proceed.’

‘How? I’m a refugee and I need help.’

‘Yes… but,’ Irene scrunched his face as he had to give an uncomfortable explanation. ‘You see, we had a bit of a history of demons running around and causing problems. Plus, demons don’t exist, so we can’t just let you walk around freely.’

Furious, Daylan pointed to himself. ‘Idiot! I am clearly real…’

‘No, you are not.’ Irene calmly interrupted. ‘Wider humanity doesn’t know of the existence of Hell or demons; I hope you can imagine that it will cause some problems if everyone on the internet saw you. Personally, I am not looking forward to a religious war anytime soon.’

‘Well… I am still telling the truth. I am a refugee.’

‘Yeah, yeah. They all say that.’ Irene wrote something down into his notepad before he continued his questions. ‘Now what is the reason that made you flee Hell?’

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Daylan paused, he realised that he couldn’t tell the truth to the humans that were interrogating him. ‘I fled because of my faith,’ he lied. ‘I carry with me the Koncradam, the holiest text and artefact of my religion. I am the last of my people, and I need to find a safe place to store it. Will you help me? I am willing to give you the holy text if you are able to look after.’

Irene raised a brow and scanned the book. ‘Huh, that book does look old. Did you pour coffee onto it?’

Daylan gawked, stunned at what the man said. ‘Coffee?’

‘Yes, did you pour coffee or tea on the book to make it look old?’

‘No, I don’t know what coffee even is! Are you fucking racist or something?!’

‘A little.’ Irene admitted with a slight chuckle.

Unbelievable, I am going to die here. Daylan thought to himself, astonished by the unprofessionalism and apathy of the man in front of him. He started to regret coming to Earth if every human was like Irene.

‘Last question,’ Irene announced with a smirk. ‘Did you steal any important artefacts from Hell so you could use those items as leverage to get into Earth?’

Daylan looked at Irene in horror, ‘what do you mean?’

‘Well, kid. You seem clever, but not so clever enough to know that the teleportation device you used had a delay, and with the wonders of modern technology we can even detect where you are going to teleport and when three days ahead of time. Just enough time to hear news of something important being stolen.’ Irene put his notepad away and pulled out his pistol. ‘Look, this isn’t personal. But we must keep the peace with Hell and sometimes work with them to make sure nothing bad happens between us. That will also mean returning anything of importance to Hell if we deem it necessary.’

‘But, I’m no thief!’ Daylan pleaded.

Irene raised his pistol, unbothered by the tears running down Daylan’s face. Irene knew he had to kill a child, someone who had a reason to escape. ‘No hard feelings, it’s just business.’ He told the kid, in truth, it was part of the course to keep the fragile order of humanity alive.

Daylan raised the book in front of him to cover himself, but nothing happened. He peered over the book to see Irene talking into his earpiece and halsted his pistol.

‘Good news!’ Irene smiled, ‘you are now granted asylum! Congratulations on reaching this point. To be processed, please follow my friend Alaksiej to the armoured car not so far from here. Remember, no funny business, okay.’

‘Is this some kind of trick?’

‘Nope, it seems you are telling the truth. Now hurry up, I don’t want to stay out here any longer than I need to.’

Daylan walked past Irene and walked up to the man who emerged from the shrubs. Skittish, he was prepared to run but decided it was best to follow their orders. He had no other choice but to.