Two weeks later, after settling into their new school, the Paranormal Club regroups in their clubroom to discuss their plans on moving forward. On her way back, Cerys notices fliers plastered along the hallway mentioning that popularity results will be announced shortly. She makes her way into the club holding one of the fliers.

“Popularity, huh? So who can-”. She’s suddenly cut off by the door slamming open, a loud BANG following a large teen around the size of Yuudai.

“Bureaucracy is such a fucking drag,” the newcomer fumes as he walks in. “I had to wait a week to get accepted, and ANOTHER week to get into this club. Unbelievable!”

Cerys tries to snip back by saying, “It’s not like you’ve been sorely missed.”

He glares back fiercely at Cerys. “I don’t remember asking for your goddamn opinion. Where’s Kusaka?” He marches up to Katsuki with a face full of rage.

“Oh my, is the big bad guy mad at little ole me? Whatever could I have done?” Cerys says with a smirk and a shrug. Saito looks up, unamused by the situation.

Mayumi just deadpans a suggestion. “You know what you need? One of these pills, it’ll calm your tits.”

Kirika keeps trying to calm things down, pleading with everyone, “P-please don’t fight!”, though her voice mumbles off a little as she adds, “o-or use drugs...”

Katsuki asks nobody in particular, “Another one of these? How many pent up rageaholics can my club have?” The tension is thick, but then the giant teen speaks again.

"You better be grateful you're on my good side, Kusaka." He relaxes his clenched fists and tries to calm himself down. Then, looking up at the rest of the room again, he asks a simple question: “Right, so...Who the fuck are all of ya?” The group collectively rolls their eyes at the question.

Mayumi walks up to him and stares him down. “I’m Mayumi Asuka, who the hell are you?”

Yuuri decides to cut the tension by asking him much more politely, “What’s your name?”

“Raidou Kurabe. I'm the reason this shithole of a club is gonna own this school.”

Yuuri simply claps her hands together and smiles, "Very interesting! We're....glad to have you, Mister Kurabe. I'm Yuuri Sayamura, Vice President of the Paranormal Club!"

Raidou is caught off-guard by Yuuri’s friendliness, only able to mutter out, “...Yeah, whatever” in response. “So, a Paranormal club? Like, with ghosts ‘n shit?”

“Yeah, ghosts and shit.” Mayumi snarks, “Emphasis on the shit.”

Cerys chimes in with an utter truth. “Mostly we just yell at each other and never get anything done. That’s one thing this place has in common with my old school.”

Saito calmly adds, “I wish we could just chill out but someone’s always gotta be pissed at someone else. Whatever.”

Raidou sits down, then leans back on the chair slightly. "Who's pissed at who? I just got here, chump."

Saito waves him off, saying, “Dude, don’t ask me, I can’t even keep track. You’ll see though. I tell ya, non-stop.”

Yuuri nudges Katsuki and whispers, “How about the President introduces herself to the new club member?” Katsuki stands up and introduces herself formally, as a president should.

“Right, ok. I am Katsuki Kusaka, president of this club. We're in a slight budget crisis, along with a popularity war, so I'm ok with you joining our club.”

Raidou just waves his hand absentmindedly, adding "Yeah, nice to meet you and shit."

Yuuri jumps in too, exclaiming, “Buuuut, it shouldn't matter, because our club will definitely come out on top!”

Saito decides to say something actually useful and asks, “Yo prez, I thought we got the money the last time. What gives?”

Kirika turns to Saito and says “Well, we only got 10000 yen, I doubt that lasts long. Especially with the unexpected medical expenses.” She turns her head towards Akina and shoots out a glare.

Mayumi jumps in before they can get off target, reminding Katsuki, “You only told us to get 2500 yen, prez, and we got four times as much." Mayumi yawns, then finishes her thought, "So if we needed more, you should've said something."

Katsuki counters by saying “Well who could have predicted fighting a week into the school year?”

Cerys looks shocked. “Wait, the school makes us pay to go to the nurse office?” She then mumbles, “And you say this isn't a shithole...”

“So… You’re broke and you don’t do any paranormal stuff. I bagged a real winner here,” Raidou says with a hint of sarcasm.

Kirika’s pet bat squeaks angrily at Raidou as Yuuri stammers out, “W-Well, we CAN do paranormal activities, but funding the club comes first! And Katsuki, don’t worry! I can handle funding, so please don’t stress yourself.”

Cerys speaks up, asking, “How are we even going to do funding? I don't want to watch Mayumi slut it up again.”

Raidou glares angrily at the bat, then turns his gaze to Yuuri, “So let’s go find some other club and take their stuff.”

Mayumi, who is checking up on her makeup and nails, chimes in. “I agree, we should roll some nerds.”

Kirika tries to calm Kokoro down, petting it and saying, “Shh, it’s okay” as she does. Yuudai decides to ignore the calls for violence, instead asking, “Do we have any other ideas for fundraising? Telling fortunes can only get us so far.”

Mayumi puts away her hand mirror and looks at Yuudai. “Isn't fighting the whole point of this stupid club versus club shit?”

“Well, the student council says that we cannot get any outside funding, but I don't really want to resort to fighting…” Yuuri looks around the club hoping someone has another idea.

Raidou clenches his fist. “Fuck the student council. They ain't done shit, I could have been in this club a week ago if they actually did their jobs.”

The PA system activates. "Hello everyone, this is Ryouhei Mikami, your dean. As you may know, or you probably forgot, your activities are being broadcast the world over. Because of this, there are popularity polls going on constantly. Currently in the lead is the Tabletop club, since they were able to preview the new Dungeon Quest 5 expansion. Taking second is Gaming Club, likely because they are running their own livestreams through Fidget.tv. Taking third is the dark horse Paranormal club, who almost got us kicked to a R-18 rating. Each club has been allocated an extra 40000 yen for their work.”

Yuuri looks up happily. “Well look at that! 40000 yen right to the club’s funding!”

Mayumi smirks and looks over the room. “All of you suck my dick. Each and every one of you.”

Kirika gasps in surprise, exclaiming “D-D-Di-”, but then catches herself and looks away while covering her mouth with her hand in shame.

Raidou rolls his head, joking, “That’d be paranormal, right?” with a chuckle.

Cerys then looks at Mayumi with some disgust. “Please don’t have one.”

Mayumi stares at Cerys and hikes up her skirt. "Wanna find out?"

Cerys looks away. "I'm more worried I'll see a black hole instead of a dick under there."

"That'd be the most paranormal thing in this clown-shoes-ass club," Mayumi chuckles and then releases her skirt down. "Let's just keep it as Schrodinger's Snatch." Raidou busts a gut at Schrodinger's Snatch, slapping his knee.

Katsuki puts an end to the silliness by raising her voice. “So while that’s all well and good, we still aren’t number one yet. And based on the mood here it seems like we have a lot of competitive members.”

Yuudai pipes in, “Yeah, no one remembers second place, and we aren’t even there yet! Let’s shoot for the top!”

Groaning, Saito adds, “Ok, but what could we possibly do to raise our ranks?”

“A test of courage? Maybe we can go night crawling tonight,” Yuuri suggests. “What do you think Katsuki, can we have some fun?”

Mayumi scoffs at this. “The only nightcrawling I do is through pubs and clubs.”

“I can see a test of courage ending in several injuries, with these guys over there.” Saito points to Raidou, Akina and Cerys’ general vicinity.

Yuuri takes the conversation back over. “Something like that, it’s kinda hard to explain right nyow. Er, ahem, now.” Yuuri says with a slight blush of embarrassment.

Raidou stifles a laugh. “N…. Nyow?”

Saito glances over to Raidou, and says, “She talks weird sometimes. Don’t let it bother you.”

Kirika rushes to Yuuri’s side, clasps her hand in hers, and exclaims “Oh no! Do you need some water, Senpai!?”

Yuuri is slightly bewildered, and simply states, “Uh, sure Kirika, that’d be nice,” giving a uncomfortable and slightly nervous smile.

This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

Katsuki chimes in. “Night missions could be fun, but how is that gonna help us take first?”

Akina replies, “We can simply go up the ranks by taking out the tabletop and gaming club. After they got that boost in funding, they will be the most rewarding to target.”

Yuudai turns to Akina and asks, “How do you propose we overtake those two then?”

Kirika runs off to fetch some bottled water, as Cerys looks over to Mayumi. “Pretty sure with the kind of night action one of us likes to take, we'll be first in no time.”

Raidou punches his palm and growls. “We’ll roll up and beat the shit outta them.”

Mayumi ignores Cerys and points out, "We could probably get the Tabletop Club working with us, since they think they're wizards and shit. We're both playing pretend, so we have common ground."

“Well considering that tabletop dork was pretty rude to us, I wouldn't mind going after them first,” Katsuki recalls with a frown.

“Yes, he was rather unpleasant,” Yuudai mumbles. "Nerd calling me a freak, that's somethin’…”

Saito chuckles as Kirika returns with the water, offering it to Yuuri with a smile. “Well let's see, we CAN do our paranormal fun first and... Oh thank you Miss Komori!” Yuuri says as she takes the water, then continues. “Ahem, and then we can probably do some club raiding. I mean, if we have to.”

Katsuki gets a devilish grin, “You know, we could always stop by after hours and play a prank on them.”

Yuuri pumps her fist into the air. “Yay, a silly prank would be quite fun! And I’m sure our fellow troublemakers can come up with something entertaining as well!” She turns her head to Mayumi and Raidou. “Isn’t that right?”

Raidou chuckles. “Pranks? Sure, I'm great at those. This one time, this guy wasn't looking, right? So I decked the fucker. Funniest shit.”

Mayumi shrugs and says, "Why don't we make 'em think they summoned Cth..Kazoo...That fucking tentacle thing nerds get hard to."

Katsuki slams the bottom of her fist into the palm of her hand. “So it's settled, later tonight we mess up some nerds.”

Saito turns away from the two girls, doing his best to ignore their existence. “A prank is fine as long as we don’t get caught. What do you have in mind though?”

Akina puts her hand to her chin, her finger extended. “If we raid the gaming club, their equipment should prove to be lucrative to sell.” She then continues, “Also I hate video game streaming.”

Mayumi gives a questioning look to Akina. “...Yeah, fuckin’ with people is always fun.”

Kirika suddenly pops up with an idea. “Oooh! We could use this!” She then whips out her Necronomicon. The room reacts to the book with a mixture of awe and disgust, giving looks with various levels of confusion at Kirika. She gives a smug smile.

Saito says, “Oh, I’ve heard of this. It’s called a… Cruelinomicon or something.” He then nods his head in self satisfaction, knowing he is correct.

Raidou is the most puzzled of all. “A book? What, are we gonna learn them to death or something?”

Kirika stammers out, “I-it’s just a collection of translated Lovecraft works…. But it LOOKS like a real Necronomicon!” keeping her smile bright.

Yuuri snaps her fingers. “We could prank them by dropping this on their nerdy heads! Good idea, Kirika!”

Yuudai stares at the book. “Lovecraft? You’re trying to make people fall in love or somethin’?”

Raidou speaks up. “Make love, not war huh? Weird plan, but whatever.”

Mayumi is somewhat shocked, saying, “...Is that human skin, or am I just fucked up?” She looks between her hand and the book a few times, then shakes her head.

Kirika replies meekly, “I-it’s not really human skin…”

Cerys taps her foot. “So, are we going to fake a cult meeting or something with this? Tie one of them up, surround them, and fake sacrifice them?" she finishes with a grin.

Kirika lights up, saying, “O-one day we could have a real cult meeting like Mummy and Daddy!”

Saito shrugs. “So, I mean, this is still just a book. Nobody’s gonna be afraid of a book. Yeah, sure, they’ll read it. But then what? Do we use it at a distraction or something?”

Raidou looks the book over, “I dunno, man. It’s pretty funky lookin’”

Kirika holds it up highly, beaming with a smile. “It’s a really big book!” She holds it for a moment, then as her arms start shaking, she drops it back down onto the table.

Akina stares the book down, saying, “Just hit them hard enough with it.”

Yuuri picks up the book and goes to open it, but Kirika hurriedly grabs Yuuri’s hands. “W-we don’t need to open it.”

Yuuri recoils slightly in surprise, then quickly drops it back onto the table. “Wh-Why not? Is it cursed?”

Raidou says, “It ain’t cursed, I can tell as much. If it were, you wouldn’t be able to put it down.”

Yuudai picks it up and studies the cover, saying, “I’m sure it isn’t cursed, but I don’t see what we’re gonna do with this.”

Raidou peers over his shoulder at the book, but Mayumi shoves him out of the way to say, “So, what are we actually gonna do with the book? I mean, I‘ve got some contact shit that would make anyone who touched it trip balls for a while.”

Saito chimes in. “Well, those nerds were crowding like flies earlier. This should get their attention, and then we’d be able to get our prank done!”

Kirika excitedly suggests, “W-We can get some candles and make it look as if we're chanting an invocation. Like what Cerys said!”

Saito gives her a questioning look. “Okay, and then what?”

Kirika looks down to her feet. “W-well Cerys said we could kidnap one of them…”

Yuuri speaks up. “We can always do my plan of leaving their clubroom door open by a crack, balance the book a top of it and then when the open the door it drops on their head,” then smiles proudly.

Raidou looks impressed at Yuuri. "Shit, that's a good idea."

Yuuri puffs her chest out. “Right?! It's a tried-and-true prank! Ohohoho, I'm such a genius~”

Kirika stays silent for a period, then says “W-What if we call them over, fake a summoning and then have Raidou dressed up as an Eldritch Horror? And then we lock them in a dark room!”

Raidou snickers. "Dress up. Pffahah."

Yuuri rubs her chin while doing a thinking pose. “And then he beats them up? That could work!”

Saito snaps his fingers. “Oh, dude, you have an idea there.” Saito pulls the weird looking thing off his back, extending it out into a large scythe. “I could do the dressing up part too, I can use this thing as part of it”

Yuuri stares wide-eyed at Saito’s weapon, then steps back. “A-As long as I don't have to do it.”

Cerys rummages through her bag and pulls out a black pair of gloves with red insides. The club notices the fingertips are lined with sharp metal tips. “I have these claws to help look the part.”

Katsuki slams her hands on the table to get everyone’s attention. “Ok how about this. We do Yuuri's idea, knock out the club leader, then drag him back here and we fake a cult meeting. Meanwhile, Mayumi dresses up as a sexy succubi, while Raidou and Saito act the part of the great old one Kazoo or whatever the hell you were saying!”

Yuuri jumps over and hugs Katsuki. “Kats, this is why we're friends. Always coming up with the ideas bringing the best outcome!”

Yuudai scratches his head. “Would anyone actually believe that we can summon monsters? It sounds like crap to me.”

Kirika turns to Yuudai, almost lambasting him. “We’re the Paranormal Club!” She then proudly adds “My family has been summoning monsters for years!” The proud look fades off her face as she adds, “I-I can’t do it yet though.”

Raidou scoffs “Kazoo? Nah, I need a more badass name, y'know? Like...Like MORGOTH, or uhh...GARGOTH!” Raidou gets visibly excited at his ‘badass’ naming possibilities.

Yuuri chimes in. “How about Vincent! That’s a scary name.”

Mayumi scoffs and chimes in, “Only if the last name is MicMohn!”

Yuuri turns away and meekly says, “Scariness must run in the family then”

Akina crosses her arms, “If that is the plan, I’ll do the part of getting their club leader. I hate doing weird occult shit.”

Cerys looks at Akina with a smug grin. “Oh, Akina, are you scared of the occult?”

Akina glares back. “No, I think it looks stupid.”

Cerys responds smugly, “This whole club is stupid so it fits the theme.”

Yuudai shrugs, saying, “I still find it hard that anyone will believe us…” He then looks up suddenly. “And why are you all suddenly against paranormal stuff?”

Yuuri speaks up. “Wait, I think I have this. We could probably lure them into a suspicious area and claim it's haunted. That way we can use our ‘paranormal expertise’ without really doing something that could be unbelievable, like Yuudai was suggesting.”

Saito gets everyone’s attention. “Okay, now we need to figure out how we’re gonna get the club leader.”

Yuuri nods and continues to explain the plan. “Once half of us lure them into the haunted spot, the other half of us can be the ghosts and demons that are haunting the area.” Various club members nod in agreement.

Yuuri continues, “It's much better than my, er… original suggestion. But then what? Half of us are there with their club and the other half are being demons and ghosts. How would we get their money from that?”

Mayumi and Katsuki speak up at the same time. “We beat their asses!” Both of them look weirded out that they’re agreeing for once and turn their backs to each other after realizing.

Kirika quickly jumps up. “What if we say that we're the only one who can stop the demons!” She then grabs and swings the book up “With the book!” She tries to hold it up, but then slams it back down out of arm weakness.

Raidou brings up, “Or like, what if we tell them the demons are appeased by cash?”

Yuuri shakes her head and says, "They wouldn't believe that."

Raidou responds, “I mean cash works pretty well on demons, just sayin'.”

Akina curtly says, “Most people will pay up if it means they stop getting beaten on.”

Mayumi sneers. “I don’t give a shit what the plan is, I just want to beat up some nerds!”

Saito speaks up matter-of-factly. “Just ask for like… a lot of money. Nobody walks around with 40000 yen on them ”

Katsuki brings the attention back to herself. “You guys do know we still have video games club to deal with right?”

Raidou pounds his chest and says, “We can kick that bridge’s ass when we get to it!”

Yuuri excitedly adds on, “Tomorrow!”

Kirika shakes her head as she puts the Necronomicon away on a shelf while mumbling, "I thought it would be fun.”

Yuudai looks around the room and asks, “So we’re really going along with this summoning thing?

Yuuri shakes her head. “We're going to lure the tabletop club into our ‘haunted location’, Yuudai. And then when the ‘demons’ pop out, our club will run away. Leaving the tabletop kids to get beat up by the demons.” Yuuri checks with the others to make sure she didn’t miss any details.

Saito says plainly, “Hmm, good plan. They’re nerds, they can’t run.”

Yuudai speaks up. “...and we're the demons I take it?”

Katsuki responds, “Yuudai, Raidou, Cerys, and Mayumi will be the demons.”

Yuuri warns, “It'll also be dark, so we just need to be careful for when we ‘run away.’”

Cerys adds, “Well you guys could also just ‘disappear’ and reappear as demons and help us beat them up.”

Yuuri closes her eyes and nods her head. “Of course, after this our ties with the Tabletop Club will be absolutely shattered. So good luck ever getting them to talk to us again.”

Yuudai sighs and shakes his head, but Katsuki interjects with, “I'm sure we could spin it in some way, like ‘Oh no tabletop club we are just poor helpless girls and weak guys.’”

Cerys asks, “So what kind of demons will we be, all the same type or different ones?”

Raidou looks at Cerys. “How comfy are you with having multiple arms?”

Cerys responds, “I'll rather be something with claws.”

Raidou smirks, “Then I guess we'll be different things.”

Yuuri asks the room, “So, Saito, Kirika, Katsuki, Akina, and I will be the people who ‘run away?’”

Saito says, “Yeah, that sounds good to me.”

Akina scoffs and says, “I will not run away like some coward.”

Katsuki replies, “Akina, you can dress up if you want then.”

Akina gets an evil smirk on her face. “In that case I already know what to dress as.”

Raidou nods towards Akina. “Ditto. We’ll run by the Drama Club and steal some good shit for costumes.”

Yuudai puts his hand on his forehead. “I can’t believe we’re actually doing this…”

Saito puts his hand on Yuudai’s shoulder. “You’ll be fine, man.”

Yuuri claps her hands and smiles. “Okay, then two hours from now we’ll put this plan in motion. Oh, this'll be fun!”