Chapter 14 - The Hopes of Mecchen House (cont.)

But, when I opened the door, what I saw inside was the same as when I brought food up to Nana. Also, as before, Nana was nowhere to be found. After picking through the forest of computer towers, I found a wall and started tapping on it for a reaction.

I called “Nana!” several times and peered over to where I found her last time. The keyboard console was there and the cooling unit, but no Nana. I worked my way over to the far end of the room.

Through a clearing of towers, I found her. Slender consoles curled around her like pet serpents. She wore a hooded peripheral, which gave her long hair the appearance of a rising, silver cobra.

I called to Nana. She turned slowly and watched me with her blue eyes. She seemed to probe this new face I wore. I’d had plenty of bizarre interactions with her, from the random-like sentence fragments she spilled out when we first met to long-winded techno-babble to terse replies. This time felt disturbingly-normal.

She asked, softly, “Can I help you?”

“I don’t know. Are you? Are you helping me?”

“I do all that I can.” Her head dipped slightly.

“Really? Did you give me this face?”

“No. I did not.”

“Did someone else do it? Was it Hitomi?”

“No. Hitomi did not give you that face.”

“Then who did? Do you know?”

“Alas, I do not.”

“Is there anything you can tell me… about Hitomi? About what is going on?”

“I can’t say much.”

“Why not?”

“Because there are still so many unanswered questions.”

“Like what?”

The room felt still. The constant background hum of the computers went away. It was like everything had suddenly shut off, like in a blackout.

“…‘Am I alone?’…”

I tried to ask my next question without sounding nervous. “And is there an answer?”

“I hope so.”

Like a slowly awakening chorus, the hum returned. I took a deep breath.

My brain kept fighting between the notion of Nana as a time-wasting head case and a misunderstood source of answers. Mami’s notions about Nana echoed in my thoughts.

“Alright. Then can you tell me about yourself? Where were you born? Where did you grow up?”

“Those are places of many unanswered questions.”

“Is there anything you know about your past?”

“There are only fragments.”

“Can you tell me what you know?”

“Would it really matter to say?” She seemed to be searching me.

“It would to me. I want to know as much as you can recall.”

She shut her eyes. She wobbled and raised her hands to remove her headpiece.

“I would tell you honestly, though I wonder about my life. But I will try. My first memory feels like a nightmare. I feel loss. I feel something breaking. I want to scream. Then I’m alone. There are faces. A hand touches me. I’m lifted up. There’s a cold bed. People come and go. Someone takes me eventually. They put me in their home. They smile around me. I make no effort to mimic them. I sleep. I eat. I do what they tell me. I go to school. They hug me, though I don’t know why. One day, I hear a soft, familiar whisper. The whisper comforts me. I listen to it. It asks me to do things. I do them gladly. I want to make the whisper happy because it makes me feel better. It tells me to come here. It tells me what to do and to say. I try to listen. I make things it tells me to make. I can hear it better, with help.” She held the headpiece in her hands. “It doesn’t ask much of me, but it doesn’t tell me much either. I read. I research. I wait and hope that it will all make sense.”

It was a strange, fragmented story but, considering everything, I was willing to hear it. I only had one question myself, “Nana. Is this whisper you talk about… Is it the one you call ‘Hitomi’?”

“It is.”

[https://i.imgur.com/6WPH9Aw.png]

I settled on the floor. It was a large step to take Nana at her word. Even she didn’t seem absolutely sure in everything she was saying, so how was I to know for sure either? From the sound of things, it seemed like Nana was helping this whisper named ‘Hitomi’. So, if this… whatever it is, is trying to turn us into girls, then that meant Nana was a party to that. But, by her word, neither she nor it was causing this.

It just felt so endlessly frustrating.

I looked at Nana and sighed out, “Listen. If you’re involved in us turning into girls, even in some small way, I need to tell you that it’s hurting us. I need to tell the whisper that we’re suffering…”

She interrupted, “It knows.”

I nodded. “Okay. We are suffering. We’re not supposed to be girls. We were born as boys. Maybe Nathan would be able to cope, if given time, but Jamie and I were never meant for this. Do you understand? He is in pain, and I feel lost. My face is gone. No trace of it is left. I can’t stand to look in the mirror and not see myself anymore. I feel like I’m a ghost. Do you understand?”

She watched me carefully then bowed her head. Nana was very quiet before she finally answered, “I do. I’m sorry. I’m trying to help. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I feel the whisper wants to set things right as well. It wants to help you three.”

I had to wonder what form that help would take, but, despite the oddness, I felt rather comforted Nana and ‘Hitomi’ seemed to be on our side. I rubbed my head.

“Well, if you or anyone else find out a way to fix or reverse what’s happened to us, I’d really appreciate it if you told me.”

“Understood. Is there anything else you need from me?”

“I still have many questions. I don’t know if you have the answers. But I’ve asked you about all the things that have been stewing in my mind. Oh, there’s also the image in the family album in Ms. Ishida’s room. And in the background of the photo in the hall…”

“A young girl who...bares a significant resemblance to me.”

“And there’s a photo of three builders who look rather like me and my friends used to.”

“I know that image as well. I’ve done some searching. They are among the many questions I have as well.”

“Has ‘Hitomi’ provided any answers to questions like that?”

“Hitomi has provided some guidance. But I cannot say much more than I’ve said, for certain.”

I felt in Nana a sincere wish to do something for us, so I decided to leave it at that.

“Thanks for what you’ve been able to tell me. I’m gonna keep searching for answers too.”

Her head leaned forward. The light wind arced around me. “Are you leaving?”

“Well, Jamie ran off, so there’s no telling where he might’ve gone. I’m gonna go and see if he’s okay.”

Her face looked calm. “If someone you cared about left or was gone then you would go after them?”

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

“Naturally.”

“Do you care about me?”

Okay, that was a pretty peculiar question. I’d only talked to Nana a handful of times, but I was warming up to her particular quirks.

“I care. I don’t want to see you hurt. I’m not quite sure what you mean though. Are you suggesting something?”

The typical female crush, at least so far as I’d seen in anime, would’ve turned away to blush and say a small “no”. Instead, Nana lifted her head and uttered a careful, “Yes, I am.”

“And what is it… that you’re suggesting?”

“My question: Am I alone?”

I stepped carefully, weaving my way through the snaking cords. The wind seemed to push me. I ignored it and wrapped my arms around Nana.

I told her, “I am here. I know I sometimes just watch, and I need to take more action. But, if you need my help, I promise to do my best.”

She looked at me and my arms like I was a captivating curiosity. She nodded once and answered, “Thank you.”

We parted company, and I weaved my way through the computers and back to the hallway. Nathan and Ms. Ishida stood nearby in similar poses. Nathan’s new face wore such an innocently-curious look. Since Mami and Katsumi had both closed their doors, we walked down the warm-smelling steps. The light of the new morning had just begun to play across the boards.

The second floor was quiet. I checked Jamie’s room and found it empty.

On the ground floor, Reiko and Sumi stood in the middle of the hall. Sumi had her arms around Reiko, who was writing something in a notebook. Ms. Ishida smiled and wished them a good morning. They both returned the greeting but stared right at us.

Sumi made a soft, purring noise and slipped out from around Reiko, who looked back at her with inquisitive eyes. Sumi flashed Reiko a smile and moved closer to us.

“Well… good morning to you two, too. We saw a cute blond run out of the house a few minutes ago. Your friend?”

I nodded.

“She looks quite good with long hair. Nice face too. As for the two of you, I must say I’m surprised. How far have things… progressed?”

I assured her, “We’re still boys, if that’s what you mean.”

“Could’ve fooled me. Oh well. It’s such a shame neither of you is dressed up nicer. I figured Katsumi would’ve corrected that.”

I steadied my eyes on her. “We’ll dress how we wish.”

She smiled again. “Of course. But the right clothes bring perfect melodies to the surface. Shame I don’t have my phone right now for a photo. You both are quite memorable.”

She looked down at Nathan. “And you, royal blue. Your face has changed so much. You have lovely eyelashes. And you’ve gone from… towering to fun-sized. I can’t help but be intrigued.” Nathan glanced at the floor with red tracing his gentle cheeks.

I stepped forward a little. “We can discuss the changes later. Can you tell us where our friend went?”

Sumi crept nearer. Reiko narrowed her eyes at Sumi, who seemed not to notice. Ms. Ishida kept to the side. With a slow inhale, Sumi said, “She went quickly but… I’d have to say she left through the door at the end of the hall. Beyond that, I can only guess. Sorry.”

I would’ve just gone as I was, but I remembered that I was still dressed in pajamas.

A watchful Sumi lingered on us as we passed with Ms. Ishida as our escort. We made our way to the kitchen, where Miki and Tara were darting between the fridge and a set of pans. I figured this was a safe place to leave Nathan while I changed. Miki welcomed Nathan to help with an entree. He looked over the ingredients and, with some gentle prodding from Miki and Tara, set to work according to their instructions.

I made my way back to my room, passing Sumi and Reiko standing off to one side. Reiko looked away from Sumi as she caressed her shoulder. I didn’t stop for more than a glance at them.

I dressed in clothes that would suffice for outdoors and returned to the ground floor. I snuck by Sumi and Reiko again and caught one word from Sumi’s lips as I passed.

The word was “love”. I hurried on.

Nathan had Tara and Miki on either side, coaching him. Ms. Ishida pulled out some plates. His hands darted and stirred around the pan. He crouched to grab more ingredients and add them to the cooking, egg-like mixture. When it came to flipping, his motion was almost too quick, and he had to dart over to catch it. Miki whooped, and Tara fluttered her apron like a wing. They asked me if I wanted to join in too.

“Maybe when I get back. I’m gonna go see if I can find Jamie.”

Tara bowed her head. “Please help Jamie-kun! I hope he’s okay…” Her somber look soon dwindled when she went back to dicing cucumbers.

I went down to the end of the hall. My shoes and Nathan’s were still there. Jamie’s were gone. Mine fit like clown shoes and flopped against my feet as I walked but they were good enough if my hunch was right about where Jamie had gone.

It looked even earlier than it felt. The normally pure-white sun of this world was just a bright-yellowy smudge of light curiously peering over the crystals of the sea. Despite my huge eyes, the light didn’t hurt or blind me. Quite the opposite of what I expected.

I limped down the steps, hindered by my shoes. I felt so ridiculous with them on. I looked around Rock Lane.

Unlike the last time I left Mecchen, a strong sea breeze pushed against me. I leaned against a stone wall until it calmed down. It curled at my sides but soon settled into a weak rustle through the trees.

The gas station looked as barren as ever. It made me think of an empty set waiting for the cast and crew to arrive. Downtown Brookville looked just the same way on our first trip to that strange path through the trees, the destination in my search for Jamie.

Everything felt still. I held my breath as I came to the pedestrian walkway and the bus stop. I climbed up. I listened carefully. The sound passed my ears and with it, the rush of the city returned. Cars hustled along their way. One even passed under me. Distant figures ambled in front of their houses. A bus thundered blocks away. I let myself breathe and walked over to the path. I peered down it as far as possible.

For a moment, I entertained the notion that Jamie had actually found a way home. I worried if I walked down it as well then I would be leaving Nathan all alone in this place. But I decided to check the length of it before thinking of other places Jamie might be.

All my concerns were moot, as I found Jamie sitting in front of a large tree after a set of hills. He had on his clothes from yesterday. He looked utterly defeated. His hands trembled.

“Jamie…”

It took three times for him to respond with a soft, “I don’t know what to do. Our only chance of an answer is Nana.”