I.The Secrets of the Troublesome Draft 1
Back to Fred and Ingrid, Modern Earth, 20xx+2
“Hey what time is it already?”
“Ah it’s a few minutes past eight.”
Ingrid answered Fred after looking at her wristwatch. It was a few minutes past six since Fred started his long story about the past and how he met Elrufus Dax back at his past life at Mytherion.
Fred never intended to consume that much time telling stories of his past, but he did anyways. Deep inside him, he wanted to tell Ingrid much almost everything, but since Kyrie and Ara were waiting back at the studio, he chose the most important parts to tell: Those parts that indicate his inspiration of writing ‘Mae’s Struggles to being an Unattainable Flower.’
His draft went a span of six chapters, a single volume which contained the introduction. There were a few emphasis of character backgrounds, plot developments and character introductions too. When Old Man asked the span of chapter he initially planned to make the serialization he told him about thirty-five to forty-plus chapters, estimated.
Fred have two options he considered after getting his award: either to continue with a long-running serialization, or a short one. Of course he had been consulting with Old Man regarding this matter. He needed someone who governs decision-making, especially one with lots of experience with similar situations he was encountering. Besides, he had Ara and Kyrie under his wing so he needed something that would run for a long time. Employing a jobless undergrad with a split personality and a rich but jobless can-do-all princess will still cost him but he needed to, no other options will employ them besides him.
Mae-SUF, as Kyrie have called his long-titled draft to its shorter name, was supposed to be the first original serialization that Fred will be doing. But Old Man rejected it. He pointed out where Fred was lacking with regards to the story flow. He still gave Fred the option to continue the story, but Fred realized the story was lacking to he chose not to. Either ways, the story Mae-SUF was finalized as a rejected draft and Fred didn’t need to mind it anymore. He needed to move on with his next draft to be submitted. Old Man had set a deadline too.
WellI guess I’ll have to wrap this up for the meantime.
Fred had the whole story of Mae-SUF in his mind already. It was a story which he based on the events regarding one of his generals: General Orcas, which is also known as Elrufus Dax: Patron of the demi-humans. He either just had the difficulty writing it his own way or he just write the story without even thinking about events he needed to include or not.
“You haven’t even gotten to tell the important parts yet, have you?”
“That whole story pretty much comprise events from the first six chapters of Mae-SUF.”
“Huh?!” –Ingrid was confused.
Fred didn’t even gave a clarification of his previous statement. Of course anyone would wonder how.
“Sigh…”
“Wait, wait, if Mae Thelesmata was your basis for Kurosawa, Mae. That makes things shit messed-up.”
Ingrid had a point. Mae Militum Thelesmata’s personality won’t match Kurosawa, Mae’s introduced personality all throughout Mae-SUF’s six chapters.
Fred chopped Ingrid’s forehead slightly to have her realize her mistake.
“Stupid. Kurosawa, Mae’s base was not Mae Militum Thelesmata. I just used her name as a basis for the femmc’s first name.”
“You sure are odd.”
“Well what matters most is the story. The names could be changed later. You should’ve realized by now.”
Ingrid’s face of confusion cleared.
“So it was Elrufus Dax.” –which she finally went correct.
“Yes, Kurosawa, Mae and Dax’s manifestation of uncertainty should be clear with both of the stories I have presented. The point is, if they both were suddenly encountered decisions that will have a huge bearing towards the live of theirs and the people around them, they will have a very hard time figuring out the proper choice. But there are cases which they have been left with a ‘must do so will do’ situations which forces them to choose.”
Ingrid nodded. She’s displaying a face of a child who’s excited for grandpa’s stories. Of course who would not? The story Fred have told is supposed to be only a fairy tale at earth, yet, It’s happening for real from the world where he came from.
Fred continued further with his explanation.
“Kurosawa, Mae have lived with the life of peace and quiet until Shirogane, Ryuuji came and brought her a major change. But what about the change? Let us discuss first the environment Kurosawa is living with and compare it to past Mytherion where Dax and I have initially met.”
So what’s with the old Mytherion that Fred based Kamigawa-high with?
“What I could say regarding past Mytherion is that races have always strived to prove they are superior. These have always resulted to multiple battles, even large scale wars. Humans, us demons, beastkin, the ancient ones, who knows if even Gods themselves partake these battles. That is what have always been. Even with my generation. You may say that the scale of battles have been lessened, but races are still making moves bring each other down. Who knows if the kindest of the peace advocators might still me plotting something ulterior that might affect the good reputation of a known country? I told you before didn’t I? Earth is a place anyone at Mytherion might want to live to.”
“That’s why you have made the popularity ranking system with the Kamigawa-high, right?”
Ingrid caught on quickly. Well it’s something obvious. Anybody that read the draft Mae-SUF could’ve got the point as soon as Fred explained. Well it was only the five of them: Old Man, Kyrie, Ara, Ingrid and Fred himself. In which, only Ingrid knew Fred’s past at that point.
“For who knows reason and whoever established the popularity ranking system, It could be whoever is within the reader’s imaginative mind. Elrufus Dax could have wondered when he was young: why does Mytherion have to be the way it is? Kurosawa, Mae could’ve asked the same when she have enrolled with Kamigawa-high: who could have established this nonsense system and just let students live their lives peacefully.”
“…” –Ingrid’s silence proved she agreed with Fred.
Fred continued.
“At a young age Dax received his calling, ‘The Patron of the demi-humans’. This had a part where I haven’t included at the first six chapters yet, but planned to put it along later on if ever the series gets serialized.”
Just like other authors, Fred tried to reduce the plot twists being revealed at the first chapters he have made. That included most of Kurosawa Mae’s background.
“If I’m about to compare Dax and Kurosawa in terms of popularity, well both could be popular enough. Dax have been treated different ever since he got his calling and it was far from how he always lived normally. In comparison to Kurosawa, I’ve planned on later chapters where she will also be treated like a VIP, something which she won’t actually like.”
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.
Fred scratched his head. He looked like he found out a plot hole from his perspective and expectations of the story. But then he didn’t let it bother him anymore.
“There, there. You’re already having difficulty distinguishing which Mae is which: Militum or Kurosawa.” –Ingrid viewed it differently.
“E-Eitherways, I have planned on later chapters that Kurosawa’s daily life will took a huge shift from being normally quiet and peaceful. That’s when she finally decides to accept Ryuuji’s offer and rise herself to the top of the popularity rankings.”
“So you’re saying at some point Elrufus Dax have finally accepted his responsibilities as the leader of the demi-humans?”
“You’re getting a hang of it already. Yes, Dax fully let go of his uncertainties and fulfilled the role. We had a long talk that night at the barren canyons. Those included topics which he couldn’t even bring up to the Thelesmatas. From his family background, to the environment and the life he used to live with at the outskirts, to the life he had at their country’s capital when he was brought there as the Patron. I even talked to him about the feelings the Thelesmatas are harboring towards him.”
Ingrid chopped his head.
“Now that’s not nice. You should’ve let them handle the situation themselves.”
“Ouch! It’s not that I just did it out of whim. You weren’t there. You don’t know how dense they could be.”
Fred had a point. Sometimes not every situation should always be resolved by the only individuals involved in it. Let’s take for example the situation between Elrufus Dax and Thelesmata sisters. It was a love triangle. Not an ordinary one at it:
Mae Militum loves Dax > Dax didn’t knew > Irish Dux didn’t knew
Irish Dux loves Dax > Dax didn’t knew > Mae Militum didn’t knew
Dax was unaware of Mae’s feelings
Dax was unaware of Irish’s feelings
Fred and others knew everything.
If no one from the external circle will give a push or trigger events that will have the dense-as-blackhole Dax and these air-headed Thelesmata sisters figure out or realize something, the situation won’t progress nor end up anywhere. Prying too much doesn’t always end up good. One must think carefully before slipping up information to an individual involved. Fred did that and have assessed that the situation needed to be told straightforward to Dax.
“Of course Dax was surprised at first. But somehome the look on his face indicated that he already had hints about it. He just does not accept the facts. Talking to me with regards to his romantic life helped relieve some of his worries.”
“So what was his decision?”
“He chose Mae.”
“Well—that’s…” –Ingrid was surprised.
“Well I suppose that’s a spoiler. Yes, of course I originally planned Kurosawa, Mae to choose Ryuuji’s path offered to her and will have a happy ending. That includes leading herself to the path of popularity rankings too. I felt bad for Shiori, Mae didn’t choose living a peaceful life with her at the end, but of course there will be a progression that should compensate with her loss, to lighten up the readers.”
Fred need not explain it further. Ingrid got it as: ‘Just as Elrufus Dax had to choose between Mae Militum and Irish Dux; Kurosawa, Mae needed to choose whether she will take on Ryuuji’s offer and be popular or to toss it aside and continue living in peace with the Occult club.
It was like a magician that revealed his magic trick. Ingrid looked amazed as soon as she got the part with regards to the comparison between Kurosawa, Mae and Elrufus Dax. It was like Fred was the magician who knew the tricks and Ingrid was just a humble viewer, who does not judge, criticize, nor try to find out what the trick really is. A viewer who will only get amazed once the whole magic had been performed.
“You may have guessed it already, but the two possibilities that opened up with Dax when he was about to choose between the Thelesmatas, was my very idea for Kurosawa, Mae having two possibilities too when she met Ryuuji, while living the way of life Shori introduced to her”
At least that should keep her from wondering for a while.
“So what was Mae’s background. You’ve given few hints regarding her mother on the first chapters.”
“Ah, that one, Kurosawa, Mae’s mother was a former famous actress and a colleague of Ryuuji’s mother, who was at that time, still a model. Later on as the story goes, there will be flashbacks that should reveal their old rivalry, how Ryuuji’s mother used underhanded methods to drag Kurosawa’s mother down from being famous. Well there’s no real meaning behind that, just to put some spice to the story. It was generic setup yea.
But with regards to Kurosawa’s family being famous, of course I’ve given hints of her potential too, like the scene at the club campaigning. Like usual mangas where the femmc suddenly becomes too op. I really think Dax had potential, yet even before he had his calling of the Patron. I remembered Mae telling he was a descendant of a great-great angel race.”
“Now you’re suddenly talking shounen-ish. Anyways, I’ve got the point.”
It was too similar. Even though Ingrid tried to hide it, she looked really convinced at how Fred had constructed the story Mae-SUF based on his past experience. Some points were lacking, but it was pretty good try for his first story. Prior to his first draft he have worked on with Ingrid with a story that he passed and he won a beginner’s award. Fred really had no experience writing stories on his own so Ingrid was surprised at how much he’s improved on writing.
Maou Spence-sensei is already good at drawing manga so making his own stories must be a thing to focus on improvement.
“Oh, right. I really forgot my demographic.” –Fred answered realizing he’s trying to serialize a shoujo.
“Ah, one last thing, about the existence of Shirogane, Ria’s character.”
It was one thing Ingrid have realized before they wrap up and head back at the studio. It was true Shirogane, Ria’s existence will make a huge impact on the main and supporting character’s progressions, considering her top seat at the popularity rankings. Ingrid thought that Fred might have something where he got the image of Ria’s character, now that he have already told stories of his past.
“Hmmm, I’ll try to leave that to your imagination.”
“Don’t tell me you’re—”
Fred stood up. He didn’t want spoil Ingrid that much. As much as he wanted Mae-SUF to serialize because he still have much up his sleeve to add to the story later on, the decision was final. A part of him might’ve realized serializing Dax’s story won’t get him any more progress than he already had. There were still several of decades he spent living back at Mytherion before his great clash against Yuusha and he might pull a better story than that of Dax’s
It was already three hours after they sat at the swing at the open playground. It was a spot supposed to be for kids, but they used it anyways. Now it was time to head back. The heat from where Fred stood up left a cloudy mark from the cold steel seat of the swing where he sat.
“Hmmmm… You were a former demon yet how warm can you be. I thought your race were cold-blooded?” –Ingrid teased him.
“You jest, I’ve told you before God made me a human when he transferred me here. I’m just a normal human with not a single trace of magic whatsoever like what I had back at Mytherion.”
“Come on just teasing you a little.”
Ingrid stood up and dashed towards the leaving Fred. She entangled her left arm with Fred’s right which had made him shiver. Fred felt the smooth, cold skin of Ingrid, as well as her soft body curves pressing at his arm. Fred felt numb. The supposedly cold sensation of his arms was enveloped with a warm feeling that Ingrid’s slender body was emitting.
She wore her shirt that she uses back at home and her casual shorts. It was not really a getup you should wear when shopping at a grocer but considering the small town they were living at, not much people would see, nor would care, so Ingrid was quite lax about her getup. Besides she was with Fred too. The opposite proved true whenever she goes to work.
With all the fuss, Fred went bright red and embarrassed.
“Wha—what are you doing?! Don’t do sudden things like that. The two sees you?” –Fred was perplexed.
“Come now, it’s not like anybode would care if they see us.”
“Of course they would!”
“Let me stay like this for a while. It really became cold.”
It was already past nine, of course the temperature would drop. Considering the season and the time of the year, it would be warm during days but still will freeze at night. Fred won’t have any difficulty, he could endure the cold. But Ingrid was different, she’s still a woman. Wearing just a shirt and a short will freeze her.
She had a point, but she just wanted to cling towards Fred. That was a truth she couldn’t deny.
“O-Okay. But listen, you have to get off until we reach the front of your complex.”
“Okay okay, I just want to cling on you for a lot longer. This makes us look like a couple. Isn’t it nice to be like this? Can we try to walk a little slowly?”
“You’re really not trying to hide it. I told you already. I won’t waver. My feelings for Yuusha is solid as diamond.”
“Okay okay~~”
The two walked beside the road towards the apartment complex.
Fred breathed a sigh. His breathe formed a fog due to the difference on temperature.
Looks like I escaped further questioning. I nearly lost myself a while ago and let confidential information slip. I’m sorry Ingrid, I really don’t want to hide some information with you but I really don’t see any merit in continuing this story further.
There were some thing Fred still hadn’t told Ingrid. It was true, where he ended up narrating wih Dax’s story did not match up with some of the keypoints he further discussed with Ingrid back at the park.
The reason to this was due to it was highly confidential events that triggered memories which Fred really didn’t want to remember:
What happened after his talk with Elrufus Dax that night at the Barren Canyons?
What happened with their expedition to find the ancient Ruins? What did they found there?
What happened with the rest of the convoy heading back at the demon capital?
These were the important questions Ingrid did not asked Fred. She might’ve forgotten, or she might’ve chosen not to ask. The discussion completed but the story remained open-ended. The two of them walked down the street with tangled arms like a couple, but they were not.
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