“You’ve been uncharacteristically quiet. Everything okay?” Shin asked as the two of us walked back home.
“Hmm? Uhh… I’m fine. Don’t worry about it.” I was unsurprised by the disapproving look he gave me. Even I didn’t find my deflection convincing.
“I know you well enough to know that when you get quiet like this it’s because you have a theory about something that you’re working out in your head. You sure there’s nothing you wanna talk about?”
“You know me a little too well. There is something on my mind, though I don’t particularly believe it myself. Or rather, I don’t even want to say it out loud, for fear of willing it into existence.”
“It’s unlike you to believe in superstition.”
“I know. That’s how much I don’t want to believe this idea I have.”
Shin looked at me with sympathy in his eyes. I hated hiding things from him, but I didn’t want to say what I was thinking out loud at any cost. It would make it all far too real.
“Well, if you’re adamant about not telling me, that’s completely fine. I trust you enough to know you wouldn’t hide anything important from me. But you know that I’ll always be there to lend an ear if you need someone to talk to, right?”
“Are you practicing your wedding vows or something?” I giggled a little at his sincere earnestness, and it helped me feel a little better. “Thank you, Shin. I appreciate it.”
“Hey, what’s a boyfriend for, right?”
“Taking my side in arguments?”
“Oh, don’t even start that again.”
Just as we always did, Shin and I fell back into our comfortable meaningless banter, and my heart was lighter for it. And it stayed that way for much of the walk home, until a great dread came over me all at once.
“Hey, you okay?” Shin’s tone, which was previously a calm concern, was now outright worry. I must have been showing my emotions on my face more than I expected.
“Y-yeah I’m… could you wait here a moment?”
“Mai?”
I felt an overwhelming urge to investigate something I saw off through a side alley, but I didn’t want to trouble Shin. I decided to just go alone.
“Just wait here a bit. I’ll be back in a second.”
“I… okay. I’ll wait for you.”
I knew he would do so if I asked. He’s too kind-hearted to be overbearing. With Shin agreeing to stay behind, I wandered into the side alley where I had spotted something before, and mindlessly turned the corner.
Around that corner was a familiar face, in an even more familiar outfit.
“Yokoshima!” I suddenly snapped out of whatever weird state I was in and took a defensive stance. What the hell was wrong with me? How could I aimlessly walk into a trap like that?
“Chill out, Sugi. I’m not here for a fight.” Yokoshima stood up from the wall she was leaning on and looked me dead in the eyes. “I’ll just say it straight: fighting back against the legions of hell is suicide. Join us. You four have a power that’s too valuable to waste by dying fighting a losing war.”
Before I even really had a chance to process the situation, Yokoshima launched into her hellish sales pitch. I wasn’t buying it.
“Hand the world over to Baal Zebul? Let the legions of hell run wild and destroy the things that make us human? Why on Earth would I ever do that.”
“A pity. I had thought you to be the intelligent one, but it seems you’re just as dumb as the rest of them.” She tutted derisively before continuing. “You’re so desperate to protect your concepts like love and friendship, but what will it matter if all your loved ones are killed in the upcoming war anyway? I won’t pretend it’s a desirable situation, but you’re making it worse for yourself.”
Her words made a lot of sense… no, they didn’t. But my heart wanted desperately to agree with her. I loathed the idea she was suggesting… but it felt so convincing to me.
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It was unusual. I wasn’t normally the type to be swayed by sophistry.
“I… feel like I’m being compelled…” I muttered to myself, but it seemed that Yokoshima was able to hear me.
“It seems you’ve figured it out, haven’t you?”
“Your power… you can manipulate people’s thoughts and emotions.” Now that I had become conscious of it, I could actively fight back against the rogue thoughts being planted in my mind, but until now she had made me dance like a puppet on a string. “That’s why I came here alone… that’s why Saki, Nao and I walked into your hideout despite knowing the danger… you’ve been moving us like a marionette.”
“You’re right on the money, Maichan. I would have managed to keep all four of you under my control, but unfortunately that boyfriend of yours has a case of paranoia stronger than any magic power on Earth.”
“Paranoia caused by the actions of your boss.”
“I guess the Director preemptively shot us in the foot by traumatising your boyfriend enough to keep his guard up 24/7. Had it not worked on the other three of you we never would have been able to lure you in.
I felt foolish. I had walked straight into Yokoshima’s trap twice, all because I couldn’t tell my own real feelings from those planted by her.
“Manipulate me all you want, I won’t betray my home. Earth belongs to humanity. We’re it’s protectors and caretakers. If Baal Zebul wants it, he’ll have to pry it from cold, dead hands.”
I forced Yokoshima to meet my eye, and after a moment she sighed and shook her head.
“I thought you were smart enough to not throw your life away, but perhaps I misjudged you. If this is the way you want to die, I’ll grant it to you. On the day the war begins, your team and mine will come face to face. I’ll show you what happens you try to fight back against overwhelming force.”
“And I’ll show you that there’s still hope for a better future.”
“A foolish endeavour. I’ll enjoy watching you fail.”
She turned away from me and raised her right hand to activate her time dilation magic, but I stopped her just in time.
“Wait!” I shouted, my voice so loud it reverberated all the way along the alley. “We know you have Kei. What have you done with her?”
Upon hearing the name, Yokoshima turned and looked at me with surprise in her face. Despite that, there was a knowing look in her eye. She knew exactly what I was talking about.
“Kei? You mean Kyoukei Mira, right?”
“Yes. She’s our friend and classmate. Whatever you’ve done to her, we will bring you to justice.”
Yokoshima looked away once again, and spoke with a tinge of sadness in her voice.
“Stop searching for Kyoukei Mira. You won’t like what you find if you don’t.”
“What the hell do you mean by th-“
Before I could even get a sentence out, Yokoshima disappeared in front of me. Her cryptic answer brought only more questions. What was so terrible that Yokoshima would tell me to stop searching? Why would the magical girls capture her if not to turn her into a magical girl? But even so, it answered one burning question: there was now no doubt that magical girls had something to do with Kei’s disappearance.
“What was that you said before about not meeting up with girls who’ve tried to kill us?”
Shin’s voice sent a cold sweat down my spine. I had practically abandoned him in the middle of the street to talk to our enemy. Even if I was being manipulated, it didn’t make me look good.
“Shin, I-“
“You’re not hurt, right?”
“Huh? N-no…”
“Thank god. Come on, walk with me. This place clearly isn’t safe.”
He beckoned me to come along with him, and I obliged. I breathed a sigh of relief that he wasn’t upset.
“How much did you hear?”
“I came over after you shouted ‘wait,’ so only the very end. Still, between the note that Saki found and the cryptic shit Yokoshima said, I guess there’s no doubt at all that they’re involved in Kei’s disappearance.”
“Y-yeah… seems that way.” I hesitated on my next question, but I knew I had to ask it. “Hey, Shin?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think we’re fighting a losing battle here?”
He didn’t answer right away, and the grimace on his face told me that he couldn’t outright say ‘no.’ It seemed he was harbouring the same worries as me.
“I would be lying if I said the odds don’t seem to be stacked against us. Did Yokoshima say something that made you ask that?”
“Yeah. She said we’re throwing our lives away and that we were gonna be crushed by an ‘overwhelming force.’ It made me wonder if this whole war really is just suicide.”
“Hmm…” he put his hand to his chin as if in deep in thought. I wanted to tell him to stop stealing my bit, but I let it slide this time. “I think that’s the wrong way to look at it. You’re an analytical person, so it makes sense that you’d try to calculate the odds and want to flee if they’re too poor. But even if there’s a 99% chance we lose, that still means there’s a 1% chance we can save this world we love and protect the things that matter. If we give up now, we lose that small chance. If the cost of giving up is that I can no longer love you, I have no choice but to fight back.” He then looked directly at me and gave me a grin, trying to lighten the mood a little. “Besides, what man doesn’t dream of martyring himself to protect the people he loves? That’s a top 5 male fantasy.”
“Do not start raising death flags now, you fool. If you widow me before I’m even old enough to legally get married I will never forgive you.”
“I’d have to give you my black veil. Who knows, maybe the look would suit you.”
“Don’t even go there, you ass.”
Despite the morbidity of the topic, Shin’s stupid jokes made me feel a little better.
Perhaps Yokoshima was right, and this whole plan to fight back against hell was suicide. But Shin was also right. If giving up here meant also giving up the love I felt for him, it simply wasn’t an option. We were ride or die.
“We’re in this together until the end, right?” I said, grabbing his hand as we walked side by side.
“In sickness and in health, even in death do we not part.”
He clasped my hand with his own, and we walked the rest of the way home in comfortable silence.