Erron sprinted toward Lorarona. A bottle shattered in his path, quickly spreading an amber fluid. He reacted quickly, jumping in the air to avoid it. He landed on the ground only a few feet from her, still moving at full speed.

Quickly, she dove to the ground. Erron couldn’t react quickly enough; he tripped on her and sprawled forward. Nimbly, he tucked into a somersault, springing to his feet at the end and brandishing his rapier. “It’ll take more than that to stop me!” he proclaimed. He was abruptly knocked forward by a blow to his back; as he stumbled, Lorarona could see Miles finishing a mighty swing with his greataxe.

“You cur!” Erron snapped; an unseen crowd booed loudly. “You’ll never make it in this business with sucker punches like that!”

“You’re out of business,” Miles growled, stomping toward him.

“Your career is as dead as you are,” Lorarona snorted, approaching him from behind.

“The devil you say!” Erron blared as he jumped in the air; his hands caught a rope hanging in an arc from the ceiling. As an unseen crowd cheered, he swung away from the danger, landing on the floor with a pirouetting motion. “You’ll have to do better than that!”

A white beam of light shot from Clancy’s hand. Erron ducked quickly; the beam went overhead and dissipated on the far side of the room. “Not good enough, wizard!” Erron jested, as another horn fanfare erupted from some unseen location.

He locked his eyes on Miles and sprinted in his direction. “I will avenge your lack of manners!” he proclaimed. Just before reaching his target, he gracefully fell into a somersault, stabbing Miles as he passed. He yelped in pain and staggered backwards. Erron rolled to his feet and stopped, his feet making loud slamming sounds on the floor. “Let that be a lesson to you!” he bellowed.

Miles’ eyes flashed with disquiet. “Curse you!” he roared, though his voice cracked slightly.

Erron’s face filled with an enraged joy as he moved to re-engage Miles. He stopped suddenly as he watched a blade pierce through his chest; he fell to his knees as he turned around to see Noninja, holding his katana, ready to strike again. “Ninjas!” Erron seethed. “Too sneaky. Bad for plot progression.”

A beam of white light shot from Clancy’s hand, hitting Erron squarely in the torso. He collapsed to the ground and rolled onto his back as he let out a long, pained cry.

He sputtered and shook as the team members surrounded him on all sides; his eyes darted between them furiously. His lips moved, but no words came out.

“Well?” Noninja mocked. “Any last wit before plunging into the Abyss?”

Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

Erron glared back with hatred burning in his eyes, then his face fell. “Aw…this sucks.” His eyes closed as he went limp.

Clancy looked around. “What, no sad-trombone sound for his death?”

Lorarona snorted. “His ego probably wouldn’t have allowed it.” She sighed. “There were rumors of him not being the same person he appeared to be on stage. Guess they were true.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Miles interjected, “but cut him some slack! Being undead has to be a heavy burden.”

He was met with a wall of irritated stares. “What?” he protested. “I’m just saying, is all.”

Clancy knelt before the corpse, examining its head. “His earrings are valuable,” he declared. “One has a precious stone; the other, I’m pretty sure, is magic.” He removed them and twiddled his fingers; a cascade of twinkling sparks fell upon them. “Not exactly an ‘alarm’ spell,” he revealed, “but related. Possibly another spell created by the evil bard’s guild. But the earring let him cast it all over this room.”

“The real question,” Miles pointed out, “is whether it’s valuable.”

Clancy frowned. “Yes, but not as much as one that could cast ‘alarm’. This item’s eccentric, and somewhat useless, nature lowers its resale value.”

Miles snickered. “Figures.” He quickly searched Erron’s corpse. “Nothing on him. Anyone else want to search more closely?”

“Ew, no,” Lorarona winced, shying away.

Miles got up and eyed the bathroom. “Then I’m going to celebrate this victory in my own inimitable way.” He strode toward the door.

“Somehow,” Lorarona spat, “you manage to be more disgusting than a dead zombie.”

Miles smirked at her before turning back and opening the door. He stopped suddenly. “Uh, gang? Something’s not right here.”

They walked up to look. “What is it?” Clancy asked.

“It’s too clean in here,” Miles observed. “Looks like someone polished the stonework.”

Lorarona poked her longsword through the door; it hit a shimmering surface that tried to engulf her blade. She pulled it back quickly.

“That’s a gelatinous cube,” she explained. “And a big one! Someone’s been feeding it.” The translucent surface moved towards them.

“What do we do?” Miles shrilled, looking nervous.

Lorarona closed the door. “We’re safe. That thing is too big to fit through the door.”

Miles looked at the far side of the room. “You don’t suppose…?” He walked to the other side and opened the bathroom door. “Figures…there’s another one in here.”

“I guess you’ll just have to hold it,” Noninja needled.

“Nah,” Miles dismissed as he rejoined the group. “I didn’t really need to go anyway. I just wanted to celebrate our victory. Although…” A sly smile erupted on his face.

“Dare I even ask?” Lorarona groused.

“Are you sure that thing can’t fit through the door?” Miles asked.

“Positive,” Lorarona answered. “They can sometimes squeeze through narrow passages, but they slow to a crawl. Getting through that door is nearly impossible.”

Miles giggled deviously. “Then get ready to open the door. I’ve got something to feed it!” He picked up Erron’s corpse and strode toward the bathroom. “This is what he gets for stabbing me.”

Lorarona sighed and opened the door for him. Miles threw the dead zombie inside; it froze in mid-air, then the transparent surface moved over it and engulfed it. He backed away and brushed himself off as Lorarona closed the door.

She glared at him as he walked away. “Happy now?” she hissed.

“Very,” he gloated.