Miles was the last to arrive; he found the rest of his team seated at the outdoor café, munching on breakfast, Rikki concentrating on a paper tablet as he furiously scribbled with a pencil. As he drew closer, Rikki turned the tablet around and flashed a beaming smile; admiring vocalizations poured forth.

“What’d I miss?” Miles asked.

“Breakfast, for one thing,” Noninja informed. “But you can grab a burrito to go.”

“Nah, I’m not feeling hungry this morning,” Miles shared.

He was met with several alarmed stares. “That isn’t like you,” Lorarona cautioned. “You need to admit you’re sick.”

“Just a little under the weather, is all,” Miles asserted. “I’ll be fine!”

“Miles!” Rikki interrupted. “You’re killing me! Tell me what you think!” He thrust the paper tablet in his direction.

He saw an amazingly lifelike drawing of the other three team members, all striking heroic poses. “Wow, that’s pretty good. But why am I not in it?”

“Because you weren’t here!” Rikki jabbed. “Don’t worry, I’ll add you in later.”

As he put away the pad, he suddenly exploded into an exuberant grin. “Ye Gods, you guys! Aren’t you excited? We’re about to crack this case wide open!” He got up to leave.

“Where are we going, exactly?” Lorarona asked.

“To the city’s leading apothecary!” Rikki proudly announced. “He’ll figure out everything!” He strode down the street; the others moved to follow.

“Someone you know well?” Noninja probed.

“I’ll say,” Rikki revealed. “He’s one of my uncles.”

“Leading apothecary, huh?” Clancy trilled. “Does he take apprentices?”

“We can find out!” Rikki gushed. “He might do it just as a favor for me.”

Clancy’s only response was a broad smile.

They turned left onto a narrow street and kept walking. “So you want to give up adventuring and get a day job?” Lorarona probed.

“I can do both!” Clancy protested. “It’d just be nice to learn from someone experienced, you know? Post-graduate education and all that. Plus, I’d earn while I learn!”

Rikki turned briefly to flash an approving smile. “Sounds like you’ve got your head screwed on straight!” He turned right down a narrow alley.

“Besides,” Clancy continued, “Rikki is as connected as it gets! This could be the break I was looking for!”

“That’s how the system really works!” Rikki confirmed. “You help me with my problem, I’ll do what I can for yours! Trading favors is what makes the world go ’round!”

Rikki suddenly ducked down a dark alley, much narrower than the others. “We’re almost there!” he announced.

Noninja looked skeptical. “Guess he doesn’t get much foot traffic, huh?”

“He doesn’t need it,” Rikki proclaimed. “His reputation precedes him.”

The alley continued to get darker as it approached a nondescript door to the side. Rikki opened it without hesitation; a bell rang with the motion. A few seconds later, he poked his head outside to behold the uneasy team members. “Come on, you guys!” he exulted. “He won’t bite!” Nervously, they followed.

They found themselves in a cluttered apothecary. Bottles of all shapes, sizes, and colors lined the walls in haphazard shelves; several stacks of paper sprouted from a disheveled countertop. A fluffy cat lay on one of the piles, snoozing contentedly. Behind the counter stood several wooden shelves, just as packed. A door beyond the shelves led to a darkly-lit room, but the occasional flashes of light revealed it to be a chaotic laboratory.

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

“Who’s that nibbling, nibbling on my house?” came a gravelly voice. A head poked out from the darkness; it belonged to a wizened old man, with medium-length white hair and small round spectacles. He smiled when he saw Rikki, then stole a look at the cat. “And why didn’t you stop these dastardly intruders?”

The cat’s only response was to roll onto its back and throw a pouty look at the old man. “Oh,” he dismissed, “that’s your answer to everything.”

“Hi, great-uncle!” Rikki gushed.

The old man smiled. “Hey kid, nice you could stop by. Who are your friends?”

Rikki quickly introduced them all by name, then added “everyone, say hi to Gregall!”

“Looks kind of like Gregg Allman, doesn’t he?” Lorarona whispered to Clancy.

“Who?” he whispered back.

“Never mind,” she dismissed. “Just a conspiracy theory.”

Gregall pondered Miles, a worried look on his face. “I can see why you brought him by,” he announced. “He doesn’t look well at all.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that?” Miles snarled. “I’m fine! I’m just having an off morning.”

“We pulled this needle out of him,” Clancy revealed, handing over a folded handkerchief.

“Let me take a look,” Gregall said as he took it in his hand. He walked over to a nearby bench, dropped the needle in an empty flask, grabbed a bottle from the shelf, and poured in a little bit of the contents. Immediately, it foamed up and then collapsed, leaving a greenish-brown liquid. Gregall held the bottle up to the sun-lit window and squinted at it. “That’s not good. You’ve been poisoned, my lad.”

“So? I can take it!” Miles bragged. “I ate a dead frog one time. It didn’t make me sick!” He thumped his chest. “Barbarians are tough!”

Gregall removed a long, narrow tray from a drawer, then pulled the thin, papery covering off of the top of the trough, revealing several dots of different colors along its length. He held it at a slight angle, then poured some of the liquid onto it. As it reached the other end, he set the tray on the desk. A few of the dots shimmered, then settled down. Gregall looked pained as he put his hand to his forehead and winced.

“Whoa,” he bellowed. “According to this, it was medium spider poison. And a lot of it!”

“Is that…bad?” Miles piped up.

Gregall fixed him with a concerned glare. “You should be dead. Or at least too weak to move.”

“Fair enough,” he shrugged. “I admit, I don’t feel like myself today.”

“Is there anything you can do about it?” Rikki shrilled, sounding alarmed.

“Yeah, no problem,” Gregall revealed. “I got the very thing, right here.” He rummaged through his shelves for a moment. “At least, I think I do.” He looked behind the front row, pushing bottles to the side. “Ah, heck…it should be right here.” After a few more shuffles, his face suddenly lit up. “There it is! I wonder how it got there.”

He removed a small black bottle with a crystal stopper and handed it to Miles. “This should do the trick.”

Miles looked concerned. “How much is this gonna cost me?”

Gregall waved dismissively. “For a friend of Rikki’s? No charge.”

Miles smiled broadly. “Wow, thanks!” He uncorked the bottle and downed its contents in one gulp.

“Wait, what are you doing?” Gregall trilled. “You were supposed to rub that on your skin!”

“What?” Miles shrieked.

Gregall’s smirk morphed into a rolling giggle. “Wow, Rikki…where’d you find the sourpusses? Your friends usually aren’t this uptight.”

“I’m working on them,” Rikki snickered. “They’re a project.”

Gregall opened a door behind the counter, fiddled with some unseen controls, then pulled out a large mug filled with a golden, foamy substance. “You should wash it down with this,” he told Miles as he handed it over.

Miles sniffed it; his eyes grew wide. “So the beer helps catalyze the reaction?” he asked before taking a huge gulp.

“Not really,” Gregall clarified. “I just thought you’d like a beer.” He waved his hand in the air with a flourish. “Eat, drink, and be merry, for yesterday you should have died.”

Miles sported a broad smile as he took another gulp.

“Although, in rare cases, they can have a severe interaction, so you might want to…”

Miles suddenly collapsed to the floor, the impact of his rear shaking the room.

“…sit down.”

Miles looked incredulous. “What the devil, old man?”

“You tell me!” Gregall laughed, throwing his hands in the air. “I thought you were a big, tough barbarian!”

“He’s an urbarian,” Rikki corrected.

Gregall let out a hollow laugh. “Now it all makes sense.”