Alwin sauntered back to the village. He was getting the hang of this whole walking thing. The humans made it look so easy. They were still spread throughout the village, searching for something. All that knew was that they were tracking down a monster and the trail stopped here. Who could they be searching for? Was it Maple? Why did they have to come here and disturb the peace? Those darn humans and their warmongering tendencies, razing down monster homes just to serve their agenda.

As Alwin made his way toward the two young masters perched on their high horse, the other humans parted like the Red Sea. This Lei Mao guy must've been a high ranking member of the squad. Maybe he even second-in-command to those young masters. That must be it. Though, the way their eyes squinted and noses crinkled did make him a bit uneasy.

"Lei Mao," a man clad in bone armor approached, pinching his nose. The armor choice baffled Alwin—it was like the guy had strapped on a monster's ribcage. Why would he do that? First, it was horribly cruel and second, there were large holes in between the ribs that screamed 'come hit my fleshy bits'. Sure, he had an undershirt, but that was about as protective as a wet paper towel. "Young master Hong Jian and young master Huang Jian are looking for you."

"I'm heading over right now." Alwin saluted the guy. This time, he saluted with only his right hand instead of the double-handed salute he had conducted earlier..

He was learning! Learning how to disguise himself as a human! Maybe in the future he could sneak into human camps and be an assassin, killing all of those mean humans in their sleep. He'd be the silent protector of monster kind. Now that he thought about it, he did want some of the glory. So maybe he'd be the slightly silent protector of monster kind. Like a silent fart—you don’t hear it, but you can definitely smell his presence.

The bone armored man walked away, shaking his head. Even from afar, Alwin could hear him exhale loudly. Was talking to whoever Alwin was impersonating that stressful? Yes! And Alwin was playing the role perfectly.

He waltzed up to the two young masters high atop their horeses, one in red robes and the other in yellow. Now that he got a closer look at them, they both looked the same. Twins if he had to guess, which he probably didn't. It was quite obvious. Their faces were identical. Two black beady eyes staring into your soul. Skin smooth as butter, so smooth that Gus might've started licking them thinking it was butter.

The only things setting them apart were the color of their robes and the handles of the swords at their hips. The red-robed man had a red handle, and the yellow-robed man had a yellow handle. Now for anyone who doesn't know some basic Chinesenot familiar with basic Chinese—or Mandarin, depending on who you’re asking—the red robed man was likely the one named Hong Jian, while the yellow robed man was Huang Jian. Good thing that Alwin did understand some basic Chinese.

As Alwin moved closer to them, both of them flinched before placing a hand over their noses.

"You." The red-robed man—Hong Jian—pointed a finger at Alwin. "Where did you run off to?"

"I went to get rid of the monsters that ambushed us earlier, young master." Alwin was really getting into the role. No more stutters or stammers for this guy. Now he was the ultimate spy!

"Did we give you permission to go after them? The orders were to search for the Muffin Monster, not go out chasing some plebeian monster," The yellow robed man, Huang Jian said.

"Forgive me, young masters." Alwin bowed.

"The Elder will hear about this. And what is that smell?" Hong Jian was the first to ask.

"Smell, young masters?" Alwin echoed, trying to play dumb.

"Yes, what's the smell coming from your body?"

"The—uh—the monsters did it to me."

"Well then get rid of that smell or we'll leave you out here in this Forest and you can come back to the sect by yourself," said Huang Jian.

"Right away, young masters." Alwin bowed again.

Right, the smell. After bathing in it for so long his nose had gotten used to it—believe it or not. That would explain why everyone was steering clear of him, and not because he was some hotshot second only to the young masters. Okay, there might be a slight chance, but he was slowly starting to doubt it. The only way to get rid of the smell would be to ditch his pants. And there was no way he was doing that. All he had to do was keep his distance from the young masters, which would make his plan of luring the young masters with him all the more difficult. He’d come up with something.

"Hey! Hey!" Hong Jian snapped his fingers, bringing Alwin's attention back to him. "How dare you ignore us."

Crap. Alwin was lost in his thoughts. He should really learn how to stop zoning out or learn to multitask.

"Sorry, young masters. I was, uh, thinking."

"Did we tell you to think?" shouted Huang Jian. "No, we told you to hand over the monster cores."

"The monster cores?"

"Yes, the monster cores! Hurry up and give it then go away, I can only hold my breath for so long."

"Uh... About that."

"Spit it out!" Hong Jian shouted.

"I... don't have them? They were stolen?" Alwin's voice rose in pitch at the end.

"What did you say?" Both young masters exclaimed in unison.

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"They were, um, stolen from me?"

"By who?"

"By the, uh..." Alwin's eyes darted around the area. "By that guy." Alwin pointed at the man with bone armor.

"So you're saying he stole the monster cores? And you're only telling us this now!" shouted Hong Jian.

"He, uh, threatened me?" His voice peaked with uncertainty.

"Bring him over! Now!" They both shouted.

"Sir, yes, sir!" Alwin saluted, before hurrying over to the bone armor man.

Alwin couldn't believe how unexpectedly things had turned out. As he glanced over at the bone-armored man—what was his name?—he silently prayed that this bizarre scene would unfold smoothly. With no idea what to do next or how it would all end, he hoped that everything would turn out well. Perhaps once the dust settled, he'd consider signing up for improv classes. It would probably make his future sneak ins a lot easier—or who knows, he might have a budding career in acting.

During that whole interaction he did glean one useful bit of information: the Muffin Monster. Definitely a weird monster, but then again he encountered cat monsters made out of ice cream and snail monsters with pancakes for shells in the city of Monsteria, so Muffin Monsters weren't so strange in comparison.

But he did have to figure out he was going to handle the monster core situation. To think that the young masters bought his story about them being stolen so easily. This 'Lei Mao' guy must definitely be some high ranking figure. Either that or they're idiots. But they have horses and they're the ones in charge, they can't be idiots. And again, they have horses! One day Alwin was going to ride a horse.

"So how'd it go?" the bone armor man asked, pinching his nose as Alwin got closer. "They looked pretty pissed."

"They want to speak with you."

"Me? What for?"

"Um... They just told me to come get you."

"Probably another one of their temper tantrums," he sighed.

"Probably."

This was going a lot smoother than he had expected. He managed to get the bone-armored man to go to the young masters. Now he had to figure out how to handle the stolen monster core scenario. He would just have to put on his Alwin charm. No matter how they'd react he would just keep pushing the blame to the bone armor guy. It was the best plan that he could think of—if you could even call it a plan. Then after that he'd have to somehow find a way to drag the young masters to the rendezvous spot. Being a spy was hard and being all sneaky-like was even harder.

"Gu Jia!" the red robed Hong Jian shouted.

Alwin jumped out of his thoughts and very nearly jumped out of his armor. So Gu Jia was the name of that bone armored man.

"I've been told you stole some monster cores."

"I've never stolen anything young masters," Gu Jia bowed down placing his hands together.

"Lei Mao said that you stole the monster cores he retrieved and that you even threatened him."

"Young masters, I did no such thing,” Gu Jia insisted, still holding his bow.

"So who's telling the truth, Lei Mao? What do you have to say?" Huang Jian said.

"It was definitely him. He came in and stole the cores from me. I think he ate them or something."

"Young masters, I had nothing to do with the monster cores. I've been searching for the Muffin Monster this whole time, and when I saw Lei Mao, I simply told him that the honorable young masters requested an update on his whereabouts."

"That is true," said Hong Jian, rubbing his chin.

"Yes, yes. I did see Gu Jia digging through bushes and climbing up trees, " said Huang Jian, also rubbing his chin.

"What do you have to say for yourself, Lei Mao?"

"Gu Jia stole the cores and said that he would keep on stealing all the cores he finds."

Alwin was getting desperate. What else could he say or do? He didn't think this conversation through, not in the slightest. If only he was better at lying. Improv class gods! Please lend your help!

"I did no such thing, young masters," said Gu Jia. "If I may be so bold to offer my humblest of opinions to the wise young masters, I believe that something has happened to Lei Mao. He has been acting strangely ever since he returned, and has brought along a smell so awful, it taints the very air that the young masters breathe."

"Sure, sure. Do whatever you want with Lei Mao. As long as you get the cores and he takes a shower." Hong Jian said, waving them both away dismissively.

Well that plan was a bust. He was hoping that the young masters would trust him wholeheartedly and maybe have that Gu Jia guy executed or something. It would've made his life way easier with one less human to deal with. And why did that Gu Jia have to start talking so formally? Stupid man, he made Alwin look bad.

Gu Jia's hand clamped onto Alwin's arm, and he dragged him away from the young masters. They exhaled deeply, as if they'd been holding their breath the entire time—which they probably were. As Gu Jia dragged him further away from them, Alwin could barely make out snippets of their conversation, but he could pick out something about the Muffin Monster.

Once they were out of earshot, Gu Jia pushed Lei Mao, who was actually Alwin, against the tree. "What the frack are you doing? Are you trying to get the both of us killed? And seriously, why do you smell like shit?"

"Uh... Reasons?"

"Reasons? That's all you’ve got to say. You run out on your own after the young masters told us to turn back, then you come back smelling like shit with holes in your armor, and now you're trying to get me killed because you don't want to give them the monster cores. I have half a mind to stab you."

"If you stab me, then I'll just tell them it's cause you threatened me about the monster cores."

"Again with the stupid lies. Here's what you're going to do. You're going to go back to the young masters, you're going to apologize for lying and hand over the cores, then you're going to find a river and get rid of that smell. Got it?"

The way Gu Jia was talking to him made Alwin think that this Lei Mao guy he was impersonating wasn't actually that high ranking. Alwin's impression of Lei Mao had flipped back and forth so many times in the past few minutes that he didn't know what to make of it. He still needed to find a way to get the young masters to follow him to the rendezvous spot with Uchronia and Gus. Maybe he'd lie and tell them that the Muffin Monster stole the cores and try to lead them there. It was the best plan he had, and if Uchronia heard it she'd probably boil over with fury over the lack of details. Well, he'd work it out somehow. Probably.

"Well?" Gu Jia shouted.

"Yup, sure, okay. Let's go."

Without warning, Gu Jia grabbed his arm and yanked him back toward the young masters. The sudden jerk nearly tore Alwin's arm from its socket, but he stumbled forward to keep pace.

"Forgive me for intruding again, young masters," Gu Jia said with a deep bow

"You two again." Huang Jian's face scrunched up.

"What is it?" Hong Jian said.

"Lei Mao, has something to tell you. Right, Lei Mao?" Gu Jia yanked the armor forward, but this time Alwin couldn't react in time.

"What the—" Gu Jia gasped, staring at the gauntlet he'd torn from the rest of the armor. He released it in shock, and the gauntlet continued to float in the air under the influence of the Spirit Hand.

This was going to be a problem.