In 1580
The UK Parliament was discussing a new bill, which I – Edward VII, the King of
United Kingdom of Great Britain and the Netherlands – suggested.
The bill was to hire all low-rank government officials by test from now on.
Generally, both houses – the House of Lords and the House of commons
– all expressed objection for 2 reasons.
First was the uneasiness that one day, all government officials will be chosen with a test.
And the second was the worry that the questioners – the King and the Administration
– will be stronger than the Legislature.
One Senator of the House of Lords said
“Your majesty, the Roman Empire maintained sophisticated but systematic bureaucracy, even though they appointed bureaucrats by-elections of the Roman citizens; recommendation from the predecessors; buying and selling office seats. The other European countries are not so different from that, so why on Earth do you wish to desert even the Roman traditions?”
And one Yeoman from the House of Commons added
“Yes, your majesty. The current system is working smoothly and selects the talented who can serve Britain. There’s no need for adventure.”
Okay, so you guys worry that your son or nephew or love child will not get a job on the administration like before – by bribe or/and blood. But you owe me one thing, right?
“As you might know, 2 years ago (In 1578 summer), I enacted a Constitution and clarified all men’s duties and rights in this country by word. You agreed to it then, but you make me perplexed now…hmm…I wonder why.”
“But your majesty…”
So, the Congress couldn’t oppose strongly since the Constitution was, in fact, a concession from the Crown, even before they asked. That is because the King gave them one favor, so maybe this time, they have a guilty conscience that they should yield to the King this time.
Or maybe they had a hunch that the King may nullify the Constitution and lock them up if they don’t agree to the new bill since it’s the Middle Age now and many Kings and Feudal Lords…are not like me.
But perhaps the biggest reason is that they saw through my tactics and try to log-rolling with me. In other words, they received A from me and they will give me B in return and I will give them C in exchange for D I want and so on.
“…Okay, then, what do you say I establish a new department that will supervise the education policy along with the government official hiring test? I will give the power to appoint the minister of this department to the Parliament.”
“Splendid idea, your majesty! Isn’t the Parliament is the place where the smartest of Great Britain gather? The students will be the root to uphold this country.”
“That’s right, your majesty. Your excellent point of view makes this old fool amazing every day!”
So, in the end, I conceded once more.
In exchange for changing the hiring system of the low-rank government officials,
I gave the Parliament one more minister rank that they can hold.
And then the Congress cheered. The questions for the test will be made by the professors of Oxford University and will be submitted to the Ministry of Education. And the test will be held from 1585, the time which the Bureaucrat Schools will be established on every count feud and will teach the knowledge that is necessary for this test.
Of course, it required a large amount of tax. But since I didn’t have war except in 1563 – which I fought with my aunt Elizabeth (The would-have-been Queen Elizabeth, the younger sister of Queen Mary, in original history-which I wasn’t born.) who rebelled with the Protestants, there was no large spending. Also, since I had large tax resource called the Netherlands (I started collecting religious tax from the Protestants of the Netherlands from 1572 in exchange for religious freedom.) the excuse “There’s not enough money” was nonsense.
If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
On the contrary, there were not enough teachers in Great Britain and the Netherlands to teach the students at the schools in the country. It was solved by inviting the jobless scholars in entire Europe, with the help of the House of Habsburg.
(*I’m the son of Fellipe 2nd of Spain and Queen Mary of England, and my late first wife was the daughter of the Maximillian 2nd of Austria)
But I planned to make one more insurance, just in case.
“I wish to allow Jews to return to the British Isles.”
Yes. After the sack of Jews from the British Isles in 13C, I’ve decided to re-accept the Jews in nearly after 300 years. Actually, I wished to impose this after I became the King of Netherlands, but accepting Protestants was much more serious and urgent issue at that time so I delayed and delayed it till now.
“But your majesty…”
“…Of course, they will be imposed much heavier religious tax than the Protestants.”
“Long live King Edward VII!”
Of course, the Parliament was the first to pick a bone, but when I suggested that they will be charged much heavier religious tax than the Protestants, they quickly changed their position.
It was also a log-rolling like the new government official hiring system, a give-and-take that is since the tax collected from the Jews were also available to the Congress.
I’m more successful at communication at least than the Charles 1st of the Stewart or the fucking David Cameron who suggested Brexit vote, right?
1581 Fall
After the Sack of 1290, in almost 300 years, the Jews returned to England. Although the citizens of London were not happy with the return of Shylocks, the House of Commons were deaf to their complains since they were blind to the taxes which will be collected from the Jews.
The Jews who returned to England were to live in a Ghetto located in the outskirts of London.
Although they were not allowed the freedom of transfer of residence, they were given the freedom of vocation, which was intended to collect the tax. Also, if they abandon Judaism and convert to Catholic or Protestant, their status changes to Freeman, according to the Constitution.
1581 Winter
My 2nd wife, Anna was pregnant. It was a blessing after 4 years, which my first wife Maria died.
I told my 6-year-old daughter Elizabeth (*I named her after my aunt, Elizabeth.)
“Be a good older sister to your sibling”
And she replied
“If she’s a sister, I will.”
Oh…?
“Hey, be nice to your sibling, even if he’s a brother.”
“Hmm…then wouldn’t it be correct that he takes good care of me?”
“…Hahaha!”
Clever girl! You, only 6-year-old-girl, found out, how the world of Blue-blood Aristocrats and the Royal works now?
I could only laugh.
1582 Spring
Anna gave birth to a fraternal twin. The firstborn was a boy, and the latter was a girl.
But the girl couldn’t live a single day since the umbilical cord was strangling her neck.
I named the survived boy Richard, which was a wish that he would become a strong and brave king, just like Richard the Lionheart.
Anna cried after seeing Richard, who still couldn’t open his eyes.
“Oh, my God. I gave a fortune to my cursed father and this fucking Tudor family!”
“…My queen, how could you say those horrible words!”
And since Anna refused to breastfeed to Richard, the 2nd daughter of the Mayor of Manchester became his nanny.
1582 Fall
Richard was given Infant Baptism. Elizabeth, who saw her younger half-brother Richard for the first time, uttered sarcastically to him at the sight of him crying after seeing her
“Fucking asshole.”
And I fired her tutor on that day.
1583 Summer
With 40% of the royal asset as a warrant, I established the East India Company and granted them the monopoly right of the trade with the East.
The East India Company was the first stock company in Europe and its HQ was in London and its first branch was in Amsterdam. Of course, the 1st stockholder was the Royal Household who contributed the largest funds, but most of the other large stockholders were the merchants in the Netherlands, aristocrats of Britain and the Netherlands, and the Jews.
This made the Gentries and the Yeomen of the House of Commons unpleased, so I sold the 80% of the Royal Household share at the 20% price of the original buyer’s price. Then they were also satisfied, but now the Royal Household was no longer the 1st stockholder of the Company.
As a result, the merchants and the nobles of the Netherlands petitioned to the King that the Royal Household to be the 1st stockholder, regardless of the % of the stocks, out of the worries that the East India Company would be controlled by England alone by the House of Commons. I gladly accepted that petition and made it a rule that the 1st stockholder of the Company is the Royal Household and the CEO would be directly appointed and be fired by the King of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and the Netherlands – which is me now.
1584 Winter
France was going to the dogs. Since Henry III’s brother, Francis, Duke of Anjou died
and because Henry III didn’t have a child, there was a possibility that Henry, the King of Navarre who was a Huguenot, would become the next King of France.
So, the Catholic Holy Alliance revolted, and against them, the Huguenots rose once again and France re-entered a civil war after 7 years of short peace.
1584 Summer
Henry III sent me a confidential letter and requested to support the brothers of faith since I’m a Catholic - although I’m benevolent to Jews and Protestants in my country. I showed the letter to the Congress and the Parliament began weighing the benefits of supporting France and the cost that will be resulted by intervening on this France Civil War.
1 week later, the House of Commons ratified the Bill which supports the French Catholics. And the next day, the House of Lords quickly endorsed the Bill that the House of Commons ratified and that night, I was requested to endorse it. Of course, I approved it on the spot with my sovereign’s seal.
So, the United Kingdom of the Great Britain and the Netherlands announced the support of the French Holy Alliance and Henry III, who was prompted by this, tried to forfeit the freedom rights of the Huguenots, but was given a warning by the Henry, the King of Navarre and the Protestant Lords of the Germany(Holy Roman Empire, that is.)
1585 Winter
The Huguenots, who were supported by Henry, the King of Navarre and the Protestant Lords of Germany, revolted. The Catholic Holy Alliance quickly fought back against them as Henry III in charge.
The Parliament of the UK (=United Kingdom of Great Britain and the Netherlands), quickly ratified a special Bill which allows selling weapons to both the Catholic Holy Alliance and the Huguenots alike. That Bill was passed on a unanimous vote on the day it was presented, and before that night, it was officially announced after my approval.
The United Kingdom stacked up gold out of blood and flesh of the French Catholics and the Huguenots.