1618 Winter(November-December)
What a windfall!
Albert Frederick, Duke of Prussia in Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth(=Poland), who belonged to the House of Hohenzollern - the same family with John Sigismund, my father-in-law and the Margrave of Brandenburg - has no male heir and currently on his deathbed. If he passes away, the 1st, legitimate heir to the dukedom of Prussia would be John, who was in the same family with him.
Yes, with my 3rd marriage with Hildegard, House of Tudor-Habsburg and the House of Hohenzollern became a marriage alliance. And its bond became stronger after she gave birth to my late-born son, Arthur. And needless to say, it's Hohenzollern's wish to become the Head of the Protestants in the Holy Roman Empire(Germany), which deepens their dependence on me.
"Prussia...hmm..."
A smirk appeared in my face after I've come up with an idea that can kill two birds - expanding my influence in the Holy Roman Empire and containing East Europe - with one stone.
Meanwhile, the Princess of Wales - my daughter-in-law, Emilia - gave birth to a healthy boy.
"Although the Duke of Cambridge exists safe and sound, isn't another boy heir worth celebrating?"
"Hold a festival for a week!"
"Yes, Imperator"
And another 3 million Ducat worth of royal assets evaporated into thin air.
1619 Spring(March-May)
I've officially sent messengers to Poland.
"Your majesty? On behalf of the Master of Europe, Imperator Eduardo Ivlivs Caesar Avgvstvs, we ask that your kingdom become a 5th vassal state of the New West Roman Empire!"
"Yes, it'll be the best for both you and your kingdom, your majesty!"
Just as I've ordered, the messengers were arrogant and threatening.
"How dare you! I'll do it when hell freezes over! Guards? Drag them out of the palace, now!"
And to no surprise, Sigismund III Vasa, the king of Poland went bananas.
"In short, 'Over my dead body!', huh?"
Of course, the disgrace my messengers received was enough 'Casus belli', but I've ordered them to stay in Poland for another month, even after they were kicked out of the palace.
So, they continued to stay in Warsaw and built a favorable relationship with the Polish Sejm(=Seym, Polish Congress) members with 4 million Ducat worth of bribe given by me before they left London.
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"So, does Imperator wish us to impeach the current king - Sigismund III Vasa - and devote the crown of Poland to him?"
"No, but he wishes your cooperation. You'll soon know."
"Hmmm...I see." "Okay, thank you."
1619 Summer(June-August)
Albert Frederick, Duke of Prussia in Poland, passed away. And his heir became John Sigismund, the Margrave of Brandenburg.
Now's my chance!
And that's why ordered Poland like this
"How can the Prince-Elector of the Holy Roman Empire - one of the 6 realms that make up the New West Roman Empire - can be the subject of Poland? It's a disgrace to the Empire!"
"Poland must either admit the independence of the Dukedom of Prussia or send its' messengers to Frankfurt, and swear to Holy Father, Jesus Christ, and Virgin Mary that it'll become the 5th vassal state of the New West Roman Empire!"
Of course, it's bullshit. But the 'Kaiser of the Holy Roman Empire' and the '1st Imperator of the New West Roman Empire' has enough power and authority to make this rubbish into a justifiable request.
And how did Poland respond?
"Fuck off! This! Is! Poland!"
So, I had only 5 words to say.
"Then, so be it. War!"
But, I didn't waste 'my' precious soldiers on this battle.
"Send secret messages to the members of the Sejm that the messengers have bribed during their stay at Warsaw."
"What should I write in the message, Imperator?"
"'It's time you pay back my gratitude. If you do so, there will be more reward."
"Yes, Imperator."
1619 Fall(September-November)
Sigismund III Vasa was put in a tight spot. Even though his country started a war with the Holy Roman Empire, almost entire Sejm members objected to military mobilization.
If British aristocrats were corrupt fat cats, the Polish nobles were maggots. No, they were worse than maggots, which become flies and eat the wastes and clean the environment.
Given the fact that Italian patriciates at least cared for their hometown, let alone the entire Italian peninsula, those Sejm members were a bunch of Judas. The only difference was that he sold Jesus for 30 pieces of silver while they sold off their nation for 4 million Ducats.
"Are they fools? They too would know the war against the Holy Roman Empire, no, the New West Roman Empire is an unprecedented risk and the entire country must unite to fight against it!"
But, they hated their king's power more than their foe's attack. Also, judging from their attitude, they've figured out that their losses from this war wouldn't be bigger than the 4 million Ducat worth of bribe I've given to them.
In short, they were disciples of Judas, traitors who've decided to sell off their nation to bring home more bacon.
So the situation becomes awkward. Even though the war started, without the parliament's consent, no troops could be mobilized and no generals could perform military campaigns. Even the mighty Winged Hussars of Poland was just a house of cards since it was treason to move troops without the congress's consent. Funny it was, but that was Poland. Thus, when John Sigismund - the Margrave of Brandenburg - invaded with 30,000 soldiers, Poland collapsed.
1619 Winter(December)
"P...Polish--Lithuanian Commonwealth solemnly swears to be the 5th vassal state of the New West Roman Empire. Also, it allows the independence of both East and West Prussia, Imperator."
"Good, very good."
In the end, Poland had no choice but to surrender and John Sigismund annexed both East Prussia and West Prussia, and became King of Prussia.
"You see? Although they were filthy maggots, it was members of Sejm who made the conquering of East Europe a piece of cake. And that's why I gave them another 8 million Ducat as a reward!"
After hearing my tricks, Richard - my son and the Prince of Wales - shook his head, with a fed-up expression on his face, saying
"I'm so lucky to be your son, father. If I wasn't, I would have been dead a long time ago."
"Well, as I always say, it's one of the ways you wisely spend money. It's up to you to do it or not. I'm just telling you how I did it, my son."
1620 Spring(March-May)
I held my Easter ceremony in Rome, at St. Peter's Basilica, to be exact. Pope Paul V met me up at 10km outside of Rome and kissed me at the back of my hand. He looked not only scornful, but also miserable, but who cares?
At least he was better than those Polish Judas, given the fact he was flattering me not because of money, but for the independence of the Catholic church.
"What brought you on this shabby neck of the woods, Imperator?"
Although he said with smiles on his face, bowing his head, I realized I was not welcomed.
But I casually replied.
"Before I reclaim Constantinople, I dropped by to ask for the help of the late Christian emperors of the Roman Empire."
To my disappointment, the Pope didn't ask me further questions.
1620 Summer(June-August)
I've officially named Richard as the Regent of the New West Roman Empire, putting him in charge of all the paperwork I've been doing so far.
After a few sighs and grumbles, he gathered his fellow scholars from the Royal Society of London and managed to keep the empire's status quo. Although I was slightly disappointed that he received other's help, he passed my test - whether he can be my heir to this empire.
"Okay, now's the time!"
1620 Fall(September-November)
After the harvest was over, I declared to entire Europe
"Deus lo Vult!"
"As an emperor of the New West Roman Empire, I declare a Crusade! Constantinople it shall be! Who's with me?"
600,000 soldiers of my original plan, who were gathered in my realms - British Isles, Netherlands, Spain, Portugal, Italy, Holy Roman Empire(Germany) - and 100,000 mercenaries and knights-errant gathered in entire Europe were summoned at my words. It was 700,000 troops in all.