10: Day: 1, Lesson: 0

Garion groaned as an alarm went off and he had to look around to find out where the hell it was! It was on the other side of the bedroom on that chunk of rock.

Staggering over to it he was tempted to smash it, but it was too sturdy for that. It was also bolted in place to prevent him from tossing it off the Earth Mote.

As he smashed the off button he had to grudgingly admit the people knew how students were in the morning. Next to the alarm was a class schedule for the following week.

After hitting the toilet and showering (as two separate activities) he went to the wardrobe and found a range of clothes that suited him.

One thing he noticed was that there were no uniforms.

Breakfast had a wide range, but he and some others knew to eat light and filling food. Those he saw gorging himself made him smile. Depending on how the classes were, that could really stuff them up.

Going to the first lecture hall, he was surprised at how large it was inside for a moment, until the space distortion effect the school was so fond of returned to his thinking.

Spotting Jane he sat down beside her, and she nodded while relaxing slightly.

Eventually everyone was coming was there and the doors closed.

Felinia went to the microphone and got down to business.

“Greetings all. For today you will only be receiving overviews and the very basics of what is needed. Firstly are the presumptions about you and the rules you need to follow and how the school works.

“It is presumed you will try to become more powerful. It is presumed you are sentient, sapient and sane enough to understand what is being taught. It is presumed you are mature enough to be responsible for yourselves.

“It is also presumed you are not my type of Deity, and thus need to learn the details.

“Now for the rules:

“For the first week killing each other is forbidden. Afterwards it can be done.

“There are no uniforms. We can’t be bothered and not all of you have forms that can wear uniform clothing. Some can’t wear any clothing at all.

“This school does have a weapons policy: have them and know how to use them.

“For class attendance, participation, tests or homework? Fuck that! We don’t care about that. If you don’t want to attend, then we will let you potentially miss out on important info that could save your life. Tests? The only test we care about is the final test; do you survive? If you survive, you pass. Homework is done to make you think about things. There is no way I want to mark all your homework! We will not ask you to hand it in.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

“You are not allowed to leave the school grounds for a week. This is so you know what is needed when dealing with non-students in the nearby school town.

“You will be able to shape and control your Earth Motes after three days. I suggest you wait until you know all you need to about them.

“No time travel or precognition. I will not allow temporal paradox here! Precogs can only view potential futures.

“You will be expected to follow the rules regarding my type of Deity once I explain them. These will be enforced.

“One unofficial rule. In the school town is an old catlady Goddess called Bakat. She lives in a house called the Cat Shack on the edge of town and there are all kinds of cats there and around there. Leave her and those cats alone. Not even I can control her, and she’s outlived a few worlds. She may seem like she is powerless, but she is not. She probably has forgotten more tricks than I ever learned, and half remembers even more. If you fuck with her, I will not try to save you.

“I will not take sides in issues as I must remain neutral.

“If these rules seem harsh and uncaring, there is a reason. I would rather you fail and die horrible deaths here than do so as a Deity with millions of followers, and screw up an entire planet!

“Any questions regarding the rules?”

Someone raised their tentacle and Felinia pointed to it. “Your question?”

“What about eating fellow students?”

Felinia grinned “Only after the first week. It can actually help you absorb their power fully. However, be careful as I think some would taste pretty bad.”

Garion and Jane were both horrified at that!

Another being asked “Where will we get followers from? A simple school town won’t have enough people for all of us to convert.”

Felinia nodded. “Correct. There are in fact 3 levels of training. First is this school where you are taught theory and some practical. Next you are allowed into the town after a week to convert people and see how things work in a more realistic situation. After that is an entire world full of those who are non-believers. You will be kicked there 2 months after being allowed in the town, or sooner if you so desire it and have developed claim over a Domain.

“They had been rescued from certain death or other situations and moved there. The souls of the faithless dead will be reborn as their children.

“This allows me to sort those souls into afterlives and given them a chance to rest.

“Next question?”

This student asked a question that had been bugging people. “I have heard that you will not only allow a school club dedicated to overthrowing you, but you will offer to be the faculty club advisor. Is this true, and why?”

Felinia gave a fanged smile. “It is true. I will allow them to try to overthrow me, and even encourage them to try. There are two main reasons for this: Firstly is that it will encourage them to learn and seek out what they can. This will make them better students.

“Secondly is that by letting them try, they will discover potential weaknesses that I can then try to remove after they have made their attempts.

“A third and less important reason is that I find it amusing and ironic.”

Garion raised his hand “Is this all a massive joke to you? It’s just that it sounds like that to me!”

Felinia cocked her head to the side a bit. “Yes, it is a massive joke. However, it is a joke I can use to do much good. The sheer amusement of doing this is one of the main reasons I started this school. One word of warning; it’s said that me and others members of staff sometimes have a killer sense of humor.”

That shut everyone up, and the smell of people soiling themselves was suddenly strong. They were magically bound to a school run by a crazy!

Felinia glanced around “And now for a brief overview of the course, and the type of Godhood!”