“I’m so excited” Nicole grinned.

“Me too.” Said Nicole.

“Don’t get too carried away, she might be easy to frighten.” Vinn reminded. “It’s a HUGE honor just to get invited to one of Gizzy’s private homes, very few people get to meet Menace. She’s VERY protective. The security here is just insane. Everything you do and say will be recorded carefully from multiple locations, she probably has a force field collar, alarms. Hell, we may have to strip down in a clean room and put on THEIR sterilized clothing. I mean, not that we haven’t all seen everyone here naked kind of a lot at this point, so who cares?”

“Oh, it can’t be that bad.” Nicole whispered as they reached the gate.

“Nicoles, so nice to see you, come on in.” Gizzy said on the screen, buzzing the gate open as a pair of Vulcan machine gun turrets rotated out of the way. They walked a way through a nice garden path to an outside gazebo where Gizzy and her wife were enjoying some beverages and snacks, passing several scanners on their journey.

“Nicole, Vinn… Nicole. Been a while seen I’ve seen some of you. This is the wife, Leena.”

“Oh wow, you are stunning.” Nicole said, looking impressed, up at a 6 foot 6 woman with curves for days and legs for a week. Her skin almost literally glistened gold.

“Oh, thank you so much, I’ve heard so much about you two. Gizzy tells me good things. And Vinn, charmed to finally meet you.” She said shaking his hand as he cracked a flattered smile.

“So…” Gizzy said. “Everyone having a decent day?”

“I’m still not convinced you’re not plotting against my boyfriend.” Said evil Nicole., crossing her arms.

“Enjoying the money?” Gizzy smiled.

“Point taken. But I’m just here to meet the…family?” she half said and half asked.

“Oh highly unlikely. There could be millions of them under the ice of some watery moon we haven’t found yet. But I’m glad you both agreed to come and meet the Menace.”

“Well, you find out you’re part alien, some insanely rare species with zero historical records or public information…can’t pass the chance to meet a full blooded one. See where I get my fancy bits.” Evil Nicole said.

“Here she is right now.” Leena smiled calmly. For being the wife of Gizzy she seemed oddly…not evil. Downright bubbly, princessy even, motherly as she hunkered down and lit up with a grin. Nicole turned to see, expecting a greeting or something, and instead there was nothing.

“Menace?!” Leena called. A little greed head poked out from behind the planter. “It’s okay, they’re friendly. One of you try giving her a treat.” Leena said, digging out a few candies. They looked close and realized they were just glass marbles. They did a quick paper rock scissors and after both picking the same thing twice, Vinn just grabbed his Nicole and let the other one do it.

“Seriously?” she asked Leena. “Marbles?”

“I know it’s weird but harmless. She eats them all the time, silicate glass is part of her diet, as well as eggshells and crab shells. Just crouch down and say the word T-A-C-O.” Leena encouraged.

“Taco?” Nicole said softly.

“oO00oo.” Said Menace, scuttering on all fours in very rapid, almost alarmingly fast series of bursts. Very gecko-like movement. She hopped to her back feet right in front of Nicole, staring at her. Menace hunkered a little inquisitively, dressed in khaki shorts and a t shirt, no shoes or socks, big almond shaped black eyes laser focused on the marbles.

“Taco?” Menace asked in a childlike voice.

“It’s glass.” Nicole assured. Menace squinted her massive almond eyes suspiciously and bobbed side to side, sniffing the air and looking very confused. For a good ten seconds they just stared at each other, the same exact height, perfectly level. Her tiny gold pupils zipped from one Nicole to the other, like she was rapidly trying to process something.

“Halp?” Menace asked in a squeaky tone.

“She’s safe, it’s okay.” Whispered Leena like a comforting momma.

“I’m Nicole. How old are you?”

“Spoons.” She replied as Leena chuckled. “She doesn’t really understand words very well, especially full sentences, we just talk to her mostly because she likes it. She just copies words she likes at random.”

Nicole got a little nervous, not knowing what to do. So she opened her eyes wide, and dilated her pupils, making her eyes go totally black. Menace perked up a little, intrigued, and leaned closer.

“M…Menace?” she asked, with a puzzled look.

“That’s right, she’s like you, but just a little bit.” Leena assured. She seemed comforted, accepting the marbles, rapidly crunching down one, and handing one back to Nicole.

“Oh, that’s okay, I don’t want any, I just ate some.” Nicole lied.

“Just pop it in your mouth and pretend to enjoy it, the blue ones are her favorites, and she’s trying to share. Just spit it out when she’s not paying attention.” Leena whispered. Nicole reluctantly pretended to eat the marble.

“Wow…very fresh.” She nodded as Menace gave a thumbs up, and she spit it out quickly while she was picking her next color.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

“Foof?” Menace asked, pointing over to Vinn as the other Nicole approached.

“Yes, he’s my foof. We’re married. He’s a very big foof.” She said.

“Mine is not allowed here.” Other Nicole said with a slightly annoyed tone. “No foof for me, yay for backup Nicole.”

Menace scuttered away suddenly like a little green torpedo, zig-zagging across the grass.

“Well, that was brief.” Nicole sighed.

“I think she’s getting her puppy.” Leena informed. “She wanted a baby foof but for obvious reasons, them being just baby Delmarians that would grow up to be…well you know, bigger, we got cloned an aquatic puppy, and she accepts him as her foof.”

“Aw that’s adorable.” Nicole said as Menace came back, this time running in a wobbly manner on two legs, holding a strange blue puppy.

“Foof.” She declared, holding him out to pet.

“Thank you. He’s very soggy, has he been in the pool?”

“Foof.” She replied, nodding, slowly demonstrating how to pet.

“Okay. You wanna meet MY foof. He’s a very big foof, but he’s friendly. You can pet him.” She assured.

“I’m good, actually.” Vinn replied from the lawn chair.

“Vinn play along.”

“Frig.” He huffed, approaching slowly and getting down to eye level in a manner that looked uncomfortable on his bad knee. Nicole hugged him and gave him a pet on the head, as he rolled his eyes, feeling like an idiot.

“FOOF” Menace said boldlyholding her arms wide to convey "big".

“Yea BIIIG foof.” Nicole nodded. Menace scuttered up and stood, carefully petting Vinn on the forehead.

“We have a lot in common, don’t we?” Nicole whispered.

“Hi.” She grinned back.

“Hi.” Replied Nicole.

“Hi.”

“She’s gonna do this indefinitely, won't she?” Nicole asked Leena who just smiled and nodded.

“She’s very special, the only one of her kind currently located.” Gizzy explained. “I’d love to share a full story on her biology and history, but it would take about 11 books on Wattpad to get the whole concept.” Gizzy said, discreetly diverting her eyes to the reader. "Yea, you heard me."

“How old is she?” asked both Nicole’s with a very slight delay.

“We have no idea. She seems like a child but with nothing to compare to and the only other confirmed to exist being somewhere in space evading scans, somewhere between 7 and 300 is our best guess. They may never age beyond children, they may take centuries to grow up. In the 5 years we’ve known her, her bio scans have shown zero age progression or brain development, or growth or anything. She’s just…frozen as she is. Just mesmerized by pretty lights and furry animals like a kiddo.”

“I wonder if that’s just hereditary.” Nicole sighed.

“Menace, Sweetie, stop gomming on Foof’s ears. She’s fascinated with his ears.

“Yep.” Vinn said. “It’s hereditary. Does she have any allergies or things we should know to avoid with the Nicoles?” he asked.

“Classified.” Gizzy yawned.

“Oh wow, look at her little teeth?” One Nicole said, baring her own to get her to mimic, displaying a set of dark grey needle-sharp teeth, all thin and crowded like a row of scalpels.

"Oh if either of you notice your teeth getting longer and sharper, hers keep growing like rodent teeth, so she has to eat abrasive things to wear them down. You may wanna find some non-toxic polishing compound or make some diamond paste for brushing at night.”

“Oh that’s fun.” Vinn muttered. “As if the play biting wasn’t enough.”

“Oh, she doesn’t ever bite anyone, even playing.” Leena assured.

“Oh yours doesn’t…lucky.” He said as both Nicoles looked guilty and diverted their eyes. Menace crawled cautiously on 3 limbs still guarding her puppy and approached Vinn’s hooves.

“Pogo.” She said, gently booping his hoof.

“She’s never seen one with hooves before.” Leena whispered. “She’s only ever met one Delmarian and he was a mini-marian.”

“Must have been one of the primes, all us genetically modded boys have these cloppers.” Vinn said casually. Menace lifted up a back foot, proudly displaying her webbed toes.

“BallOO00on.” She emphasized.

“Yea cool.” He nodded, completely lost. "Okay, okay you can pet me again I guess.” He said, as she made a reaching motion. “It’s called conditioner.” He said as if to a child.

“Not to ruin the mood, Vinn, but you are prepared for the trial tomorrow?” Asked Gizzy.

“Prepared? You said I just show up and go with the flow.”

“Exactly.” Gizzy nodded.

“We’re going.” Nicole informed as the other gave the same stern look. “If you’re borrowing our foofs, we’re gonna be there to keep them safe too. It’s hereditary.” She said with a hint of snide.

“If you insist. We’re actually having a big celebration festival the day after the trail, to commemorate my victory and give the city something to be excited for. You’ll both wanna be there.”

“You haven’t even had the trail and you’ve prepared the festival? Pretty confident.” Nicole said.

“I always like to be ahead of the curve. Vinn, I got you all VIP seats to the arena if you want.

“Nah we’re fine.” he shrugged.

“Just hang onto them, you may change your mind, there’s some really exciting old traditions you’ll appreciate. Trust me, it’s gonna be packed.”

“I might check it out.”he nodded.

“11 Fupar matches and a big finale you don’t wanna miss.”

“I’ve seen enough Fupar for my lifetime.” Nicole said darkly.

“Keep the tickets anyway, scalping is illegal, and you may still wanna catch the main event. You’ve never seen a pair of rare creatures like this before.”

“I’m actually against the idea of forcing animals to fight for entertainment, thanks.”

“Oh you don’t have to force them, they’ll seek the other out in the wild if you let them. That’s just how nature works, honey. Some animals thrive when domesticated like pets, and some have to do what they’re born to do and hunt. You can’t tame the ones that don’t wanna be tamed." Gizzy said reaching into a cooler and removing a live snow crab. She stared at it oddly as it wriggled its legs and snipped at her defensively.

“Sometimes the least likely creatures are the most dominant predator.” She said, as both Nicoles felt their stomach rumble, suddenly very focused on the crab. “GO GEET IT!” she said playfully, as both Nicoles paused, almost insulted. Without warning a green blurr shot from the grass and Menace rolled across the table ferociously crunching through the shell as if it was rice paper, viciously snacking on the crab and sitting down in the grass. She looked up, smiling, like a kid with a cheeseburger, just munching away without a care.

“What’s your point?” the Nicole on the left asked.

“Forcing animals to fight is about as cruel as preventing a natural predator from hunting. This universe is full of monsters, Nicole…Nicoles. You may be a cute little tame one like Menace here, but there are bigger, meaner things that need to fight. They crave it. They’re only happy when they do. If you wanna save the starving puppies, that is just fine, but to truly understand nature at its apex, you have to understand that there’s still a food chain. Not everyone needs to see the feeding process, but you need to accept that it happens. So you are not required to attend the show, but I highly advise you keep your tickets. They are very good seats, and you may find your curiosity perked up when you see what rare monsters I have found, that are just dying to get in there and do what they do best.”

“Fine, but I don’t have to like it. I think a more civilized world could live without that kind of entertainment.”

“Yes it would, but you don’t live there, and you wouldn’t fit in anywhere else. Look at her. There’s not a drop of hate or cruelty in her little green heart.”

“Hi!” Menace waved.”

“She’s just a little animal, the top of her food chain, stuck somewhere that she doesn’t understand, no idea that she’s no longer the apex predator. There’s nothing evil or broken about her, she’s a perfectly little creature, she just gets hungry, like all of us monsters do.” She said ominously, petting Menace who beamed with approval, crunching down crab legs shell and all like they were French fries. Not a hint of meanness or hate in her eyes. "Just let them hunt."