'I have a wall! Ok so that was boring. How do I get a board off it? I just need four.' He tried to grab the "Shitty Wooden Wall" awkwardly standing in the middle of the Research room, failing in his attempt. 'Ok if I could use the sword to smack a board off, then I can copy the board and... you know, maybe I should just research the sword first? No, I need something else to use it. Oh, no. I don't wanna have to look at that guy. But how do I take crap apart if I can't damage my own stuff? Okay this is going to suck. Like, suuuuck.'

He walked over to the corpse, that he hadn't yet claimed ownership of. That time hadn't yet paused for. He closed his eyes, cringed, reached out, and said the magic word. 'Store.' He opened his eyes, and saw the body, but not its clothing, disappear in the wind, with the wind itself blowing towards the room just past the thwomp. 'Damn it! I meant to say research.'

Instead of bothering to fix his mistake, he instead found the wooden sword that was donated, and selected that for the next research project.

[Estimated time to research: 4 hours]

'That long? Okay fine. Well, I don't have my dirtbox done, so uh... yeah. What should I do? Organize crap? I'm just gonna move it again. Oh hey actually...' He walked back over to where the corpse was, which now just had ruined, dirty clothing laying there. But something else. Something small that was moving.

'What kind of bug are you? Were you on that guy? Why were you... oh who cares, time to get stored.' Getting his finger close to the bug didn't make it react. 'Maybe it was like most of the other things that didn't try to get away? Why did the rats? Eh, I'll figure it out later.'

The insect, whatever it was, disappeared in a small wind.

He walked around, looking at what he had found, not really thinking anything, and just trying to waste time. If he had someone to screw with, then there'd be something to do! After awhile, he found himself outside the cave mouth, still within his territory. He looked around, and the sun had set long ago. There wasn't really anything to get his attention here, either. Checking the timer, he saw it had already completed.

This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

He ran back inside. 'Okay, well at least I can... you know, what if I put my phone in the wall? Oh yeah, it's dead. Like, start to write a text in order to name a room. It would provide a little light, at least. Where's that torch? Oh yeah, it's useless. The sconce is what you put it in, and I found one. Maybe I should have looked for more earlier, but too late, right? Yeah I gotta do something useful if that guy shows up. I can't do that while running.'

Walking into the Storage room, he easily found the now naked corpse of the scraggly man. Avoiding looking at it again, he walked with his eyes closed, until he felt it with his foot. 'Research! Just research and stop being gross.'

-------------- Plainsheart Exterminators Guild ---------------

Tilda took the vellum from the merchant exterminator. "Thank you for this. Go ahead and take a break before you head back."

The merchant didn't need to be told twice that he could get drunk on the guild's wealth instead of his own.

She looked over the notes, written in the captain's hand.

"Dungeon is following Core access protocols. Doorway to a room is blocked, but by a monster and so it doesn't appear to break rules that way either. One corpse discovered. A wildman of unknown identity. Injuries to the head and face are so severe that identification is not possible. Origin of injuries unknown. Weapon or magic type unknown. By description, it looked like a combination of dehydrating meat for long-term storage, done in an instant, boiling of animal fat but without breaking the skin and done from the inside out, deflation of one eye, and burning from a hot iron."

She started gagging, appalled, and after getting a hold of herself, continued reading.

"No resources of value seen, but a large amount of dirt is covering the materials reported from the dungeon run. Treasure chest is significantly larger than any I've seen before or have read about in previous reports on other dungeons. No traps seen or experienced, and the one monster present did not attack. Monster is made entirely of stone and has yet to be added to a bestiary. Dungeon is so far classified as safe but worthless. It is possible that the dungeon did not actually kill the giant that was previously reported to have been present. How that relates to the body found is unknown. I posted two guards to halt all traffic. I recommend more be sent for the same reason. - Captain Sylde"

"Well, that asks questions I don't want to think about", she thought to herself, before starting to write a copy. The original would go to the guildmaster, and the copy would be sent to the capital. Sending more guards? That would mean restarting the city so they had the supplies needed to stay long-term. If it turned out the dungeon wasn't useful, then it would be a huge waste. Maybe they could do something about that.