Vincent Kinsington
I woke up to Chet's brown eyes blinking at me. It made me smile. I wrapped my arms around his naked waist and pulled him close to me.
"Good morning," he said. His fingers traced my jaw.
"It is," I said. Every morning was good when I woke up next to him.
It was dark out and Chet was relaxed so I didn't think we were late in getting ready for school yet. We were in the last week of classes for the semester. Next week was finals. Alex and Mateo had been in their new apartment for a few days now and both seemed happy. The video of Alex had been taken down and so far it hadn't been posted anywhere else. It had snowed the night Alex and Mateo moved into their apartment. It hadn't snowed since and the weather had warmed up slightly.
"We should probably get up and get ready," Chet said.
"Mhmm." I kissed him. His hand trailed down my jaw, down my chest and circled around to my back. His lips moved with mine as his hand massaged the flesh of my back. Our waists were pressed together
"Vincent." My mother's voice rang harsh from the door. Our lips broke apart. I froze. Chet froze. Our arms still draped over each other. I had been so wrapped up in him that I hadn't heard the door open. I had completely forgotten the one time she had visited me. It was too early even if my dad was out of town and she wanted to go out for breakfast.
The panic began to bubble up inside my chest, but Chet's warmth kept it from completely spilling out. The door slammed shut and the sound of it sent shivers down my arms. I dared to look at the door hoping she had just left. No. She stood there glaring at me with her eyes narrowed and her lips pinched tight. She turned away from us so she faced the closed door. "Get dressed." Her voice was low and angry.
This was definitely not how I wanted my family to find out I had a boyfriend. I had never actually wanted them to know. Chet and I scrambled out of bed and quickly put our clothes on. I made sure to put on the tiger's eye stone bracelet Chet had got me for my birthday. I always kept it close to me. Chet finished dressing first and came around the bed to stand behind me as if I could protect him from my mother. I couldn't even protect myself from her.
"Dressed?" she asked after our movements had stilled.
"Yes," I said.
She turned to face us and her expression hadn't changed - hadn't softened even a little.
"You're gay?"
"Bi actually," I said softly.
"Good," she said, which wasn't what I had been expecting, but her next words explained why. "Then you can break up with him and get a girlfriend."
She wasn't interested in who he was or what he meant to me. She wasn't even going to ask me if he was rich or what he was studying. It was obvious from his clothes that he wasn't rich. He wasn't poor either, but my mom would only care if he had a lot of money. Well, if he had been a girl she would have cared.
"I love him," was all I said.
She sighed angrily. I saw the slight movement in her cheek as her tongue ran along inside it when it did only when she was truly furious.
"I'm going to make this very simple for you, Vincent," she said in that red voice that barely concealed her anger. "You break up with him now and we go out to breakfast and forget this ever happened or you cut all ties with your family. Your car, your apartment, your phone, laptop - everything that is paid for with your father's money, you will leave behind. You won't have access to your bank account or credit cards. You won't ever have a position in the business. Tuition fees are already paid for this semester, but next semester you are on your own. You will no longer be allowed at the house. You will no longer be a member of our family. You won't exist to us."
And the threat that had always been there since I was born was finally real. My fingers began to shake. My knees almost buckled out from under me. This had always been my greatest fear. At least until this moment. At this moment all I could think of was in those television shows and movies when this happened - or something similar - the boyfriend/girlfriend would break up with the other in a misguided attempt to protect the other one. The fear of losing my family had always been my greatest fear until now. Now my greatest fear was that Chet would speak up and volunteer to break up with me in order to save me from losing my family. My greatest fear now was losing Chet. That was the thought that almost sent me into a panic attack. I turned and looked back at him.
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Chet's mouth was open as if he was about to speak, but when he saw my expression he shut his mouth. His face softened and only love pooled out from his eyes and I knew whatever happened he would be by me. That was all I needed. Calm settled over me. Peace pulsed with my blood until it filled every inch of me.
"Can I ask one question?" I asked my mother.
She didn't say anything so I assumed that was permission. "What if my boyfriend was Alex? Then would you have accepted it?" Because I had always suspected - at least with my mom - that her aversion was not to the same sex pairing, but to the economical standing. My dad would definitely be against any gay relationship, but if it had been Alex, my mom might have defended me. This moment would reveal the truth.
Her anger subsided slightly. "Is that possible?" she asked with no hint of anger only curiosity and I had my answer.
I turned back to Chet and reached out my hand. He quickly closed the distance to take it. I pulled him with me to the little dining table where I had placed my backpack the night before. It hadn't been that long ago that I sat around this table with Chet, Alex, Mateo and Gareth to celebrate my birthday. It was where Chet and I had eaten the meal I cooked for him for the first time - and the many times after. But in the end, that table wasn't mine. The bed wasn't mine. The couch in my bedroom and the gaming console and computer weren't mine.
My phone was on the table next to my backpack. I stared at it for a moment. No one would be able to contact me. That was alright. Alex had Chet's contact info and Trevon could get Chet's contact info from Alex. Chet would let me borrow his phone to call both of them to tell them what happened. I would need new clothes. Except, I didn't have money for new clothes. I didn't have the means to buy myself anything. I'd probably have to borrow some from Alex until I could figure out how to get clothes of my own. Chet's wouldn' fit me.
Chet let go of my hand to grab his phone, jacket and backpack and then he was back by my side.
I never thought I would be without my laptop either. My fingers skimmed over it. I had assignments on it, but they were accessible through the internet and I didn't absolutely need my laptop for them.
"My backpack and my school books," I let it hang in the air. Did my mother expect me to leave those behind? I glanced at her. I couldn't tell if she was angry, sad or disappointed. Maybe a combination of all three.
"You can take them," she said. "Leave your wallet."
I took my wallet out of my pocket, took out my driver's license and school I.D. and put those 2 items back in my pocket. I left the wallet with my credit cards and cash on the little table next to the phone and laptop.
"My friends gave me some presents for my birthday, can I go retrieve them?"
She nodded. Chet followed me silently to my bedroom. I got the two game controllers Alex had given me and the few games Alex and Trevon had given me over the past few years. I put them in my backpack and then went back out into the living room.
I swung my backpack over my shoulder and took Chet's hand in mine. I let go when we got to the door so I could put on my shoes. The first one was on by the time I thought maybe she had meant my shoes and clothes too. I stood up straight with one shoe on and indicated to them and the clothes I was wearing. "Can I take these?" My voice didn't sound angry or insolent. It was merely a question.
She waved her arm angrily at me and my shoes. "Take them and what you're wearing. Leave the rest."
I bent back down and slipped on the other shoe. It was when my hand was on the doorknob that she spoke again.
"You're really doing this? You're really willing to give up everything for him? How will you live? How will eat? Where will you stay? How will you get to school? This isn't realistic, Vincent."
Chet surprised me when he spoke for the first time since my mother had arrived. "I'll take care of it." He and I looked at each other and I knew he meant every word. I didn't know if he had a plan, how he thought he could take care of it, but I trusted him. "I'll take care of you," he said.
My mother scoffed. "As if that's possible. You are both boys. You don't know how the real world works. Stop living in a fantasy land."
But I couldn't take my eyes away from Chet's brown ones as he continued to stare into mine.
"I trust him," I said.
"Trust is foolish in this world," my mom said. "I thought I had taught you that."
I finally broke my gaze with Chet to look at her. "You did teach me that," I said. "And you've proven today that what I feared all along was correct. I can't trust you. I can't trust family. But I trust Chet. He is my Trust. He is my Heart. Goodbye, mother." I opened the door and pulled Chet out with me. My mother called out after us, but my heart pounded so loudly in my ears I couldn't make out a word she said. I had done it. I broke away from my family. I had always thought if this day came that I would be devastated, destroyed, betrayed, but instead, I was free. A smile crept to my lips. I was with Chet and I didn't know how I was going to live or eat or where I was going to stay, but I trusted that Chet had a plan and that was all I needed.