The Admirable Self-Flinger bounced into the cafeteria like a flung grenade. "Human Koen! I came to offer my congratulations. The teeth have closed around your skull!"

Koen looked at her, shocked to actually feel better.

"Human Laura!" Fling hopped up to her and sniffed three times in her direction, ears forward. "My septal areas are excited to see you. Did I interrupt your courtship ritual?"

Laura stopped mid-bow. "Clarify?"

"Singing? Kissing? My nose smells no urine.1"

Laura looked at Koen, who had turned red, but was otherwise unhelpful.

"No," she said. "No kissing."

"Why not?"

"That's a personal question."

"I know. I enjoy violating your boundaries."

Now Koen felt worse again. He watched as Fancy Death padded into the cafeteria after his mistress. The cat lifted his nose in appreciation of the smells of the kitchen.

"Can I get Fancy Death something to eat?" he asked a little desperately. "Or, of course, you, Fling."

"No, no. Fancy Death and I have pre-eaten."

Koen tried to keep himself from looking at Laura. He searched for, found, and threw himself onto another diversion. "Have you talked to General Graa?"

Fling's ears twitched toward him. "My ears heard what General Graa had to say about you."

"Is he still angry?"

"I don't know how many angry hormones his limbic system was producing when you last spoke with him. Probably it produced more when I told him how impressed I was with your actions. You couldn't have picked a worse enemy to make."

Koen nodded miserably. "What's he going to do?"

"He will enfold himself in his work and family."

"What about pressing charges?" asked Laura.

"Clarify? Involve the Quotidian authorities or perhaps launch an invasion of your version of Earth?"

Koen swallowed.

Fancy Death walked behind the counter into the kitchen, where he found it hard to turn around. Breathing huskily, he backed out.

"What about an unofficial diplomatic shunning of the United Nations?" asked Laura.

Fling's ears swished downward. "Graa's brain wouldn't imagine any of those punishments. He loves Human Koen too much." The ears flicked back up and twisted toward Koen. "Don't you realize that? Don't you know how lucky you are?"

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Koen's spirits rose. Laura's scattered in confusion. "Clarify?" she demanded, "Love?"

"Translation error?" said Fling. "You are suddenly talking about erotic passion and my translator tells me you are jealous and aggressively defending your territory."

Koen, who had been about to explain, clamped his mouth shut, hope rising hot in his throat.

"I am not," Laura said untruthfully. "I am…very confused by what you said. General Graa loves Koen?"

"It is a translation thing," Koen explained. "Graa talked with me in the forest before he — before we found Mr. Grumbles. He said he feels patronizing toward me. I think that means the kind of love you have for a pet or a baby."

"Yes," said Fling. "The love of Human Laura and the love of Pick Graa reside in entirely different organs."

"No, they don't," said Laura. "I mean, I don't know about Pick Graa, but — "

Fling's tail shot up. "Quickly, Human Koen! Act! You can have them both. You can have it all, if only you fling yourself. Now!"

Both humans tensed. With folded arms, arched spine, and a narrowing of eyes, nostrils, and mouth, Laura indicated to Koen that this was his problem and he'd better stop it from getting worse.

He cleared his throat. "Admirable Fling, please understand." Now what? How could he tell her to shut up and stop meddling with his and Laura's relationship? "Love," he said, "is an unknown area. Asking 'why' probes too deeply into the mystery."

Fling's ears flicked in opposite directions. "I think my brain might understand that."

So did Laura. Her stomach ached, but her spine was a rod of steel.

"No," she said. "Koen is going to leave. The only way I can stay with him is to give up my life. I got here by always choosing right, and I'm not going to start choosing wrong now."

Koen drew in an agonized breath. Fling lifted her hands and one foot, whiskers quivering, ready to leap into battle.

"Hello, fellow sophonts."

Ambassador Li stood at the door. His stance was erect and proper, but on the inside he was remembering his first face-to-face meeting with a Party official. He wanted to hide.

"Oh, Ambassador," said Koen.

Laura snapped into the proper mode of thought. "Admirable Self-Flinger, may I present Ambassador Li Xuanlian. Ambassador of the United Nations, this is the Admirable Self-Flinger of the Toxoplasmotics."

Ambassador Li bowed. Fling hopped up to him, ears and tail held high, and touched his chest with her nose. If he had been a leopard, this would have been a most suicidal thing to do.

"It is an honor to make your acquaintance, your Admirability," said Li.

"Your organization is cowardly because it punishes its only courageous member," she answered.

Li's eyes flicked to Koen. "Is that a customary greeting?"

"It's a challenge!" Fling's teeth chattered. "Fight me!"

Li raised an eyebrow at Koen, who was turning red and trying not to hyperventilate.

Laura elbowed him in the ribs.

"Buh! Toxoplasmotics place a big, uh, emphasis on bravery," said Koen. "I mean, their brain parasites make them want to run out and get eaten by cats."

"Only the good parasites," said Fling.

Koen wiggled his toes in his shoes and tried to remember what Graa had told him about belly-breathing. "I think she's honoring you by treating you like something powerful and dangerous. Something she…should…fight."

His shoulders slumped. Li's and Laura's didn't, but that was only by an act of will. All three humans were thinking how wonderful this meeting might have been a week ago. And how a week from now, a meeting like this would be impossible.

1Ronald KL et al. Male mice adjust courtship behavior in response to female multimodal signals. PLoS One. 2020 Apr 2;15(4):e0229302. doi: 10.1371/journal.pone.0229302.