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En Perpetua: The Ziegfried Saga
The Heart Bleeds Anger

The Heart Bleeds Anger

Katsi entered with her hair tied back as she glared down the somewhat strapping figure that was her sister’s little boy toy, she hissed, “I am going to make you pay for what you said.”

Shawn adjusted the belt on his odd gi and chuckled, “That’s right. Get it out of your system.” She took a swing at him, but he effortlessly tossed her to the ground, “Sloppy. Again.” She tried to sweep his leg but he simple kicked her in the head and sent her to the floor again. “Too slow. Again.”

She jumped to her feet and shouted, “You aren’t supposed to beat up girls.”

He laughed at the clearly impulsive verbal attack, “Sorry, but criminals and heroes alike don’t give two damns. So neither can I.” Katsi growled, charging him with a lariat only to be spun and thrown to the ground again. Trying to tackle him from around the waist, she felt some measure of success until he kneed her repeatedly in respose. Trying to lift him off the ground, she was effortlessly elbowed hard into the mat once more. This continued for quite some time, her every attempt to strike him countered or parried without effort. Eventually, she grew too tired to keep swinging. Throwing her to the ground again he told her, “Get back up.”

She growled, “I can’t!”

He repeated again, “Get. Back. Up.”

She shouted at him, “I can’t!”

He jammed his foot under her back and effortlessly kicked her into the air, catching her by her shirt with his open palm. As she hung there he stated, “Is that all love is to you? A fleeting emotion? A firework that is gone a moment later?” She glared at him and he shook his head, “You came here with nothing fueling your anger than blind outrage. Their love holds no meaning to you.” She aimed a sloppy kick at his head, causing him to release his grip and step back, as she stood there, ready to go another few rounds he laughed, “There you go. Standing again.” She gave him a confused look and he nodded, “It seems impossible to some, but there are few forces more enduring than love. Even my ability to gain power from loss is rooted in a form of love. Ever present, unending, but easy to lose sight of or forget.” She took a few more swings at him while he spoke, trying again to shut the pompous jerk up, but he continued his arrogant lecture. “We are surrounded by it constantly, like air. And just like air, we can get so used to it that it seems empty or insubstantial. But just like reentry, you go long enough without it and exposure will burn you right up.” He grabbed one of her punches and threw her again. Tears forming in her eyes, she kept swinging at him for all of the dead friends he was disregarding. Every tear was a drop of blood from her heart. She felt her arms become noodles and her legs eventually gave out completely, her body falling forward as her face landed on fabric. She thought it was the training mat, but eventually she felt gentle powerful arms hug her. His tone of voice changed, “I am so sorry for your loss. It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t theirs either. The world isn’t fair sometimes. Tragedies take the people we love. Sometimes people aren’t as bulletproof as their ideals.”

She looked up at his face and saw that despite his iron expression, he was crying himself. She flailed her noodle arms to hug him, but couldn’t keep the strength to do it. She asked, “Do you ever forgive yourself? Forget them? Let them rest?”

He shook his head, “I didn’t. Even people who stabbed me in the back.” He sighed, “But they are why I couldn’t let myself die either. As the pain bleeds dry, it leaves scars that never fade.” She nodded and allowed herself to be supported for a bit longer as she got her strength back.

She eventually said, “I want to be stronger.” He nodded, sharing her sentiment.

"And you can. But you can't do it like this." she looked at him confused so he clarified, as if speaking from experience, "Love is a binding force that unites the hearts of everyone it touches. Romantics like you and me, we can bleed out if we don't draw strength from those our heart beats for. So, cherish the people close to you and your memories with them. They matter more than most believe."

Time would pass, the two would continue training, but with less excessive aggression. Sharing stories of the fallen and reminding themselves of why they are out here. At the end of the session he informed her of his new name. Katsi laughed, "Okay, fine, but I don't think I can adjust to that. You remind me so much of him. And I understand how Anisa feels now. You really are a good friend, Sh- I mean, Sai. Thank you." He nodded thankfully and she made her way out of the training room, feeling a lot calmer than when she entered.