On the twelve days of Christmas, on the hallowed eve of the wolf howl, the moon, a holy cow, my true love gave to me, a cherry, a pick me, a hold me, a pray for me, a save me, a cherish me, a tell me on Tuesday, how you cared for me that day, how you told me I'd pay, it's on me, on top of it, Isolde said, how could you wed, said its perfect, its nice, I threw up twice, I'll live, it isn't easy, but appease me, tell me its easy, to squeeze me, like a cherry peach fairy, I'm cute, I'll poo, I'll tell you its too soon, then a monsoon swept me away, told her its okay, said sigh, why would you lie, cry, tell me I’ll die, fine, I’ll fall for it this time,

And on this day, on this beach we prayed, for the peach fairy to bless us, to throw a baby my way, and let me say, May, I told you we’d buy it on Friday, or Saturday, its more relaxing for me,

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

Say your prayers, for all of those nightmares, those feed on me's, I need it’s, obscene, it, and wouldn't it be flattering, for it to be, on the Eleventh of May,

Okay, I’ll breathe for you this day,

I’ll pay, it will be on me this day,

It should be a crime,

To make such a dime,

On a such a lovely rhyme,

I had such a lovely time,

Okay, I’m in,

I’ll see you, and your twin, your break into me, like a raspberry flavoured, berry,

A seething, between things,

See me next Friday’s,

When, Wednesday,

On a– I'll choose this,

Mondays.