Lupine Hiro charged through the mist on all fours, saliva flying from his mouth as he leapt toward Monica. She swatted at him with her steel beams, the impact strong enough to send him whipping to the side.
The rage that fueled Hiro next made it feel like his heart would explode, like it would come crashing down in a matter of moments as his periphery blurred and the bloodstained world rushed around him.
He lunged for Monica and took her to the ground. Now on top, Hiro slammed both fists down and tried to bring his claws into play only to be tossed aside again.
She managed to twist with one of her steel beams and strike him across the torso.
The pain swelled within him as tumbled to the side. Even with his powerful form he could feel the impact of her strike.
Klank!
Monica jumped for Hiro again and drove both steel beams into the ground, cracking the stone foundation as he skittered off to the side.
A new thought, one that barely broke through the madness, caused him to pause and stand upright. Still in his lupine form, he reached his hand into the air, his clawed fingers tingling as he drew his massive odachi from the air.
His next strike was strong enough to cut a quarter off Monica’s already depleted health bar. With both hands on the blade he hacked at her again and again until she finally fell.
Hiro drew back, intent on stopping himself from biting into her.
But then her health bar shifted up again as Monica sucked in a deep breath, inhaling more of the yellow mist, his opponent seconds away from recharging.
Hiro didn’t hesitate. He took off toward her and jumped again with his huge blade overhead.
Klank!
She managed to block the first strike, yet he landed, pivoted, and thrust the odachi forward just as she jumped for him. His blade pressed through the chest of the bear and out the small of her back. Hiro held her there for a moment, seething, salivating, hungry, sad, angry and broken as Soul Essence poured into him and the prompt came:
[A Revenant has fallen.]
You have new followers!
Monica’s human body turned to ash at the same time Hiro’s transformation faded. His phone buzzed and he took a shaky look as the smoke settled, the light illuminated his fate.
Hiro didn’t even think about the fact that the Doom System had rewarded him an attribute increase but not a level. He was too disoriented, his mind shattered by both his transformation and what had just gone down. He stepped away and a set of prayer beads formed in his hand, the kind he had seen for sale outside temples in Japan.
Legendary Item: Thoughts and Prayers
Grade: S
Description: The Franco-Prussian War is often considered a precursor to modern warfare through its widespread usage of breech-loading rifles, mass conscription, nationalist sentiment that unified the German states, trench warfare, and siege tactics that previewed the horrors of the First World War.
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
Subsisting on rats, dogs, and cats, the trapped Parisians were only able to communicate with the outside world through carrier pigeons. Thoughts and prayers came pouring in from world leaders, who knew the power of these hollow magic words if whispered during sex, war, professional sports, the days leading up to and after a climate disaster, or following a mass shooting.
But this time, the thoughts and prayers didn’t help.
The complete and total defeat of France, which culminated with the abdication of Napoleon III and the fall of Paris revealed a new type of war, one in which an entire nation’s fate could be at stake.
But, who knows? Maybe this time will be different. Maybe you’ll get lucky.
Wearing the prayer beads around your neck will allow you to cast {Thoughts and Prayers} at the start of each battle with the possibility of calling upon celestial forces to smite your opponent before the fight can even start.
“{Thoughts and Prayers}?” Hiro asked as he placed the beaded necklace over his head.
The next prompt came:
One Hit Wonder: {North Korean Fece Balloons}
Grade: B
Upgrade: N/A
Description: The parade kicks off when the hypothalamus releases oxytocin created in the pituitary gland during sex. As an orgasm progresses, dopamine fires from the ventral tegmental area of the brain, acting on the reward system in the nucleus accumbens, responsible for drug addiction and Pavolvian responses.
To the casual weekend cuck or the thickly forearmed incel-adjacent adult content aficionado, even to the oversexed high school sweethearts who will be the first to have that baby, the first to have the cops called out for domestic violence, and the first to make it clear as hell they’re never leaving your hometown—sex is fucking great.
But to the people living near the DMZ all the way to South Gyeongsang, sex isn’t as great as it used to be.
On an early spring day along the Imjin River, red balloons appeared in the sky.
This should have been cause for celebration. Anyone fornicating at the time should have taken this as a sign from Samshin Halmoni, the Korean Goddess of Fertility, to procreate with the first thing they stumbled upon.
But then one of the balloons popped, releasing several kilos of human feces onto the head of a grandmother seated at an outdoor cafe just about to enjoy a plate of kimchi fried rice.
More balloons popped and the stench overwhelmed the city to the point that many were forced to use the gas masks stored in the subway stations.
The rest, as they say, is history. A very stinky, very shitty history.
Call upon the troubled past and likely troubled future of North Korea by summoning red balloons filled with toxic feces to destroy your opponents.
But be warned.
You are not immune from their effects…
This was followed by a final prompt:
{Demon Hachiko}
Roulette Accessory
Rank: C
Type: Summon
Upgrade: N/A
Description: Men will look at this badass little guard dog and say hell yeah.
Famous for waiting for his owner at the Shibuya Train station, and later memorialized in a statue outside the station that became a famed Tokyo meeting spot, Hachiko, the best little shiba inu the Land of the Rising Sun has ever produced, the loyalist pup this side of the East China Sea, and certainly cuter than your average backyard mutt that won’t shut the fuck up, is not so sweet anymore.
In fact, he’s terrifying.
Forged from the flesh of defrosted mastodons and bathed in the blood of rabid Orwellian rottweilers fed a steady diet of Marlboro Reds and Flaming Hot Cheetos, Demon Hachiko is the kind of animal companion a Survivor could only have nightmares about.
Demon Hachiko won’t talk. He probably won’t cuddle. He might not come when called.
But he will attack.
Demon Hachiko will attack until he is defeated. Then, in the spirit of the phrase what goes around, comes around he will be reborn from a single strip of his own flesh, ready to fight by your side again.
Whatever you do, do not attempt to pet Demon Hachiko if you value your hand.
“So I get a dog for the rest of the Interim and it’s listed as an… accessory?”
A strip of flesh appeared in the air and floated to the ground like a leaf, the strip no larger than a piece of beef jerky. It bubbled and began expanding until a bone structure took shape, one that was canine in nature. Patchy sand-colored fur coated the sinewy muscles and bones, the hair thickening as a tail and ears sprouted.
“Seriously?” Hiro asked as the transformation finished, presenting a cute shiba inu about mid-sized, with a less-than-friendly demeanor. Hachiko stretched his front paws forward and barked at Hiro as his fluffy tail thumped left and right.
Just to test his new companion, Hiro raised a hand like he was going to pet it.
Hachiko’s eyes pressed back, a snarl curling his lips. His barks became hyper violent until Hiro lowered his hand. “Easy,” he told the dog, who instantly started wagging his tail again. “People are going to love you.”