OK, something is weird.
I don’t feel like I slept well, I don’t think that’s happened before since the change.
Ok, internal status check. Fuel and water are fine, material stores down a little but nothing to fuss about yet, ah there it is. My lubrication oil status has switched over from acceptable to requires exchange, it feels like I could put it off if absolutely needed but that I really should get it over with. I’ve got the plastic jug of oil that Lilly had confirmed would be suitable for me sitting in my closet at least, hopefully however this goes won’t take too long as I need to meet Molly and Mary at the facility in a couple of hours.
I can’t say I really felt any different moving around while I was looking for the disposal jug that we had also gotten at the same time, and I was still wondering why Lilly had started expressing something that was a mix of pity and amusement over the repair bus. I know my repair buddies seem to have a better awareness of some aspects of my internals, but usually they try to get the idea across a bit better than this wait-and-see thing.
Not having bothered to change into day wear yet I pulled the hem of the camisole I was wearing up to access the little hatch on my hip which necessitated tweaking my panties just a little. I was mostly running off instinct for this, I knew that I needed to pull the little hose out and drop it in the empty jug, but I didn’t really know what would happen next.
There was a tiny delay then I felt a few valves change state somewhere in my torso together with my oil pumps shifting in behavior in some way, there was a second long delay where in I felt a bit weird and then my oil started to drain out. The visceral panic that accompanied that feeling screamed at me that dropping below normal oil capacity was very bad news, I started reaching back towards the hose where it was starting to pour into the jug then Lilly shushed me over the repair bus indicating that it was fine. My hand ground open and closed while I forced myself to not do anything, then the valves switched again and my oil pumps returned to normal as the jet of oil trickled to a stop, the panic was past now that I wasn’t actively loosing oil but I felt emptied without my normal amount.
My hands actually trembled a bit in my rush to move the hose to the fresh oil, the mixture of desire to refill the void I felt in my empty oil reservoir and my instincts prodding me towards it. There was a similar change in my internals then I felt fresh oil started to be pulled up the hose, oh that felt weird. The new felt clean and smooth compared to the outgoing old moments before, if rather cool since it was room temperature. I started to wonder why I hadn’t noticed how much worse the existing was, I guess it’s like how you might not notice a neglected knife get dull until you sharpen it, or stuff wearing out slowly in general. The incoming flow stopped once I was at capacity again, then the hose automatically started retracting back into my torso.
I had a moment or two to wonder what percentage of my total oil the shallow pool in the jug represented, then I felt the valves switch state and my oil pumps resumed normal operation again. I felt them pushing the new clean oil out into my system that was still full of the old, then they started to mix.
Argh, Ew, ew, ew.
I can feel the still cool and fresh feeling oil spread out into my lines but as it hit small local reservoirs or the surfaces being lubricated it started diluting into the old, creating moments of smooth fresh motion and then roughness again.
It’s like the inside of my oil lines were itchy and everything that moved within me was full of sand.
Suddenly I understood what Lilly had been alluding to. There’s no way I could just drain all my old oil out while active, and with my complex internals, there’s no way I could do the exchange without the use of my pumps which need something to push with. I’m going to have to change out the oil a bit at a time and wait for it to propagate through my system with each little round of fluids exchanged.
Groaning at this realization, I started to lean down so I could put the lids back on the jugs as I felt it was going to take a bit for this round to cycle then the itch worsened as the motion helped push oil through my system.
Today is going to suck.
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“Good morning Sam!” Molly greeted me cheerfully as I arrived in the office, then tilted her head with curiosity. “What’s with the bag?”
“Morning.” I grumbled back, not answering the question as I hung up my backpack. I sat heavily in my chair making it creak then reached into the bag to undo the waste jug lid.
“Sam?” Molly asked as I adjusted my clothes over my hip hatch to pull the hose out while flopping onto the desk.
“Oil change.” I groused back as the pump started getting rid of a dirty-clean oil mix a moment later. “Feels like shit, gotta do this like every hour or two till it’s done. Sorry.” I swapped the hose over and hissed at the feel of mixing oil as fresh was pumped in. It seems like such a waste to do it this way, I got a mental shrug from Lilly as she didn’t have anything better.
“Are you ok to work today? You don’t have to…” Molly asked trailing off.
“I would have to exercise to distribute it anyway, it’s just something I have to deal with I guess.” I sighed annoyed at the question. There were a few quiet moments while my pumps ran before she started giggling, prompting me to lift my head to glare at her. “What?”
“How often do you have to change your oil?” She asked, the non sequitur confusing me.
“I guess every five weeks given how long it’s been since I became a changee and it felt fresh then, why?” I tried to damp down any annoyance as I knew it wasn’t due to her.
“It also takes a while to pass and makes you feel uncomfortable during it, yes?”
“Yeah?” I was getting a bit mystified about where this was leading to.
“Is oil like blood for you?” She continued to pepper me with questions.
“Kinda, I don’t have a direct ana-“ I started.
“Sam, are you having a robot period?” She interrupted grinning.
I gaped at her for a moment processing what she said, then groaned and flopped my head back on the table as she started laughing again. “Sure, fine, whatever.”
“Hmm, you need to bring that stuff with you. That means it’s pretty easy to guess when you’re-“
“Not thinking about it.” I interrupted wrapping my arms around my head on the desk.
“Wait does that mean male robots also have a period in that dimension?”
“Not. Thinking. About. It.” I declared as my thrashing brain revealed the lie.
I felt her patting my shoulder. “Sorry for teasing you, is there anything I can do to help with it? I can imagine it’s going to be weird to get used to.”
I sighed. “It’s fine Molly, it’s just another thing. I don’t really think there’s much I can do but distract myself.” I unfurled myself as I leaned down to close the two containers before moving my clothes so the little hatch on my torso could close. “It sucks but I guess I get to have a period when I don’t even have the junk to go with it.”
She grimaced. “That’s bullshit that is, er I never asked but is that going ok with Anna? You know with… that.” She had found out after walking in on me changing one time, it had been an awkward conversation.
“Oh yes.” I answered a content smile on my face, even my discomfort couldn’t dull those memories.
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“That’s good!” She answered with a grin before checking her phone. “Mary’s probably almost done the first course for us, so we should probably head down if you are feeling up for it.”
“May as well.” I answered standing up, then winced at the feeling that brought.
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“Left Molly!” I snapped as she hesitated while identifying a civilian target, I saw a hostile one in my own area of responsibility, so I fired a few clacking shots off from the airsoft pistol at it without stopping my dash.
“Yep, yep.” I heard her reply as her pistol clacked away, as I waited for her at the next door, once she was ready I opened it for her. She tossed a dummy flash bang through, almost hitting the door, but just making it with enough margin. She’s done that a few times, and while it hasn’t been an issue yet I could see it being one, a ‘Tch’ sound of a valve opening came from somewhere in my torso putting voice to my thoughts, but I pushed the door the rest of the way for her anyway.
It had been almost an hour since the last oil exchange so the disgusting mixing feeling was in my extremities again, I noted while watching for the movement of any flip-up targets where Molly couldn’t see. There was a clacking sound for a moment before she called back for me and I followed, Mary was waiting for us at the end of the room a reflective lensed paintball mask over her face hiding any expression.
“Good time you two.” Mary declared checking a stopwatch. “Let’s call it there for today, take a moment then we’ll pack up.”
I nodded and started covering the pistol with a barrel sock on an elastic strap, once done I went out into our ‘safe’ area hissing as oil mixed in my forearm at the motion of opening the door. I roughly tossed the possibly pointless goggles of my own off onto the table beside Mary’s laptop before placing the pistol with it taking a little more car with it, they were a little behind me so I took the opportunity to drop into the chair I had the two jugs next to. The outgoing oil still felt nowhere near clean despite how little it seemed to visually differ from the new, I imagine it’s more than just macro-level particles that are an issue but either way I am increasingly expecting this whole process will stretch well past today.
Fuck, that means I’m gonna be an asshole for while.
The thought prompted an angry sigh. I’m pretty sure I was being far more rude than I ever remembered any of my friends with human periods being, if I was aware of them at all, but I only ever realized after I had responded angrily or snapped something out.
I think Molly had pulled Mary aside to warn her at some point because she hadn’t even twitched an eyebrow when I had gone off at her over some inane detail of a run I couldn’t even remember at this point. Honestly, I was kinda uncomfortable with how accommodating they were given how testy I was being, for some reason this only seemed to make me more annoyed.
Great.
The shock of fresh oil permeating into old brought my attention back and I realized someone had said something. “Sorry, what was that?” I tried to keep the discomfort out of my voice, but I don’t think I entirely succeeded.
“Nothing, nothing.” Molly said with a waved hand, I noticed Mary in the background at her laptop typing notes or an email before Molly brought my attention back again. “What was up with the ‘nade back there? Any suggestions.”
“Hmm? Uh no it was fine.” I said trying to ignore how itchy the joints of my spine were as old oil flowed back into them. “You tend to almost hit the door with them.”
Oops, that slipped out.
“Cool, too hard with throw?” She asked, apparently not taking offense.
I hesitated before answering. “It tumbles a touch as your pinky comes up maybe, but I don’t know for sure.”
“Huh, didn’t think of that.” She started unhooking her holster and removing the spare magazines from her pouches.
I sat there guiltily for a while they worked, eventually I coughed with a flare of my burners and they both looked at me at the sound. “Sorry. For um this morning, I’ve been uh touchy.” I admitted, then hissed as quietly as I could when I felt mixing in my neck. “You two haven’t done anything to deserve it.”
“Eh, don’t worry about it.” Molly said. “It’s not something you’re used to but you still seem to be handling it fairly well.”
I laughed bitterly. “Ha, don’t kid yourself I’ve been an asshole all morning.”
“Yes, and we can also read your expression you know Sam? You haven’t been that successful at hiding your discomfort.” Mary pointed out while closing her laptop, I looked away to hide my embarrassment. “You are still accepting input and working as part of the team, so you aren’t acting completely out of line.”
“If anything, it’s kinda funny how different your actions and speech are.” Molly interjected with a snicker before shrugging. “I’m sure you’ll figure out a coping strategy, although I suspect drugs are out for you.”
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I wasn’t feeling quite as gross by when I got home, but I couldn’t be bothered to do anything but flop over the dining room table. It would be more efficient to be moving around rather than just letting my oil pumps slowly distribute the oil, but I was far past the desire to do that. The idea of working on assignments had briefly passed through my mind but was swiftly rejected as I didn’t have anything due immediately and that would have meant lots of motion with my fingers.
“Are you ok, Sam?” River asked when they arrived to start dinner, they had been a bit startled to notice me, probably because I was being unusually quiet what with not having made any movements at all for some good part of a hour.
“Yes and no.” I grumbled. “Oil changes suck, Molly has called it my robo-period.”
They blinked at me, then came over to rest a hand on my shoulder. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Meh, make sure they don’t annoy me too much.” I said with a gesture up, then grimaced. “I’ll start my dinner in a bit, gotta exchange some more oil.”
“Don’t worry about it I can get you something.” They said as I pulled the hose out again, I have decided the sound of my oil draining out is gross and it still makes me panic. I think I must have been making noises beyond the normal mechanical ones because River came back and gave me a hug while I lay there on the table
Ah, shit. I was probably making sounds the whole time at the facility and they didn’t say anything.
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“Hey Sam! How are you doing? You weren’t on discord last night.” Anna asked then frowned while reaching out a hand to hold my face still while she examined me. “You look awful.”
“I do?” I blinked. “Yeah, I don’t feel great…” I brought her up to speed on the oil change shit I had been dealing with. When I finished, she stopped us to pull me into a hug while holding my face to hers, I still have no idea how skin contact like that seems to affect me so much but it does make it really easy to ignore the discomfort.
I tried to do the oil exchanges when people were already being loud during the lecture breaks, fortunately each exchange didn’t take very long. I did get confirmation out from the others I did make distinctly uncomfortable sounds while the process went on though, so I was filled with a mix of embarrassment and gratefulness for the cover the loud conversation about Halo the group in front of us was having offered.
After downing lunch quickly, I basically just zonked out against Anna as long as I could, as I reluctantly pulled away as my next class came up she insisted I come over to her place after I was done for the day. I made some protests about her having work to do, but she wouldn’t hear it and I didn’t protest that much.
“Mollllly.” I dragged out her name as she sat down beside me in math. “You didn’t say I made noises.”
She got a guilty expression. “I didn’t want to make you feel worse about it.”
I sighed. “Sorry about that, let me know if I’m making you uncomfortable. If I had known I could have just headed back.”
“Sam what would you have done if you did?”
“…Probably lay around the house doing literally nothing,” I admitted, which was exactly what I had done last night after all.
“That’s what I thought, I didn’t want you going off to hide.” She was studying me carefully. “You look a bit better today.”
“Anna said stuff about how I looked, but I forgot to ask what she recognized. My skin tone doesn’t change or anything right?” I asked confused.
“Yeah, but your expression and posture are really different to normal...” Whatever else she was going to say was interrupted by Bagshaw starting the lecture.
I don’t think math has ever been a worse experience, I only kept paying attention by brute force. I think Bagshaw noticed because he kept glancing up at me, but he didn’t say anything. Molly was fairly tense at the breaks, but she relaxed when she heard I was going over to Anna’s rather than lurking around at home after class.
I quickly said bye to Molly and then dragged myself to the buses as Bagshaw started to pack up at the end of the lecture. When I arrived at the little brick bungalow, I encountered Reiko at the door where she glanced up and down at me for about a second before succinctly declaring that I ‘look like shit’ and ushered me off to the basement. I think I basically spent the evening alternating between exchanging oil and just snuggling against Anna while she worked on… assignments I think, I wasn’t really paying attention. I was a little surprised when I woke up in her bed the next morning as I couldn’t remember getting there, I felt a lot better though and the exchange I did before breakfast didn’t have nearly the same gross feel.
I was feeling almost normal again in web dev when I got a ping from Molly on discord.
Ex4ctPlac3: Hey, feeling any better?
IndustrialCat: Yeah, only feel like shit now lmao
Ex4ctPlac3: Good to hear!
Ex4ctPlac3: Do you think you will feel better in time to join Alica and me for an artifact pick-up
Ex4ctPlac3: Thursday
Ex4ctPlac3: after class?
IndustrialCat: Sure
IndustrialCat: You ok with me skipping training tonight?
IndustrialCat: I need to catch up on assignments
Ex4ctPlac3: np!
I wish I could say the intervening time went by quickly, but it was a slog of assignments that just didn’t seem to work and eternal classes where I couldn’t really pay attention.
I did get some messages on the CRD messaging system from Alica and Drew on spare parts progress, they think they could probably replicate any of the ‘mundane’ parts of me if needed with the admission it wouldn’t be a quick process and that they would be dragged off the project for the moment given the possibility of OEM parts thanks to the portal. They were a little disappointed when I let them know I wasn’t likely to be by to ‘check out how cool the inside of my eyes are’ in the immediate future.