“I’m not dreaming right?” Tsugi’s mouth gaped open in shock. The sight had sobered her a little.
{No, you’re not dreaming silly.} Ellie laughed.
“So are you coming or not?” Master Lumes adjusted her cloak and turned to head down the road.
Tsugi followed behind them but continued to look around and reminisce. In the span of fourteen years, everything still looked familiar, but it’s been upgraded, and looked more advanced and new.
With every step closer to the orphanage, Tsugi’s heart pounded loudly in her chest wanting to escape. Her head was still hurting, but now adrenaline rushed through her veins and her anxiety masked the pain. She glanced down at her body, her giant cloak and loose shirt hid her bound breasts. Her hair was disheveled since she didn’t have time to brush it.
Wait.
“Where’s Ruzo?” Her eyes widened.
“He’s already at your house. You brought him home when we got here last night.” Master Lumes furrowed her brows at Tsugi briefly. “Oh right. You blacked out.” She chuckled.
Right. Ruzo’s at home. Home…her home.
Lugo.
Her heart pounded again, knocking on her sternum like it was trapped and it wanted to escape and run. Run to where? She doesn’t know.
Will he remember her? Will he find out that she’s a girl? What will he do if he finds out? He is a boy after all. Would he hurt her? Or would he hate her for lying all those years?
No…he can’t find out, he mustn’t. She will do whatever she can to hide it from him. He must never find out.
Through her fear, she quickly shoved it into the corner of her mind, not wanting to address it any further.
With that thought pushed aside, she bit her lip and picked at her nails nervously. Her heart still pounded loudly wanting to run somewhere…anywhere. But she’s not a child anymore, she can’t run forever.
A light tap on her shoulder brought her out of her reverie.
{Calm down!} Ellie stared at her with concern. {Are you okay? I can feel your anxiety from here.} She furrowed her brows and tilted her head so that she could see under the dark shadows of Tsugi’s face. {What’s wrong?}
Tsugi smiled wryly. {I’m just nervous.}
Ellie chuckled. {Nervous about what? About seeing Lugo?}
Tsugi slowly nodded.
{Don’t worry about it. With what you’ve told me about him, I’m sure he’s just as excited to see you again after fourteen years.}
{No, not that.} Tsugi glanced at the back of Master Lumes head before returning her attention back to Ellie. {What if he finds out…about me?}
{He won’t find out.} Ellie chuckled.
{Are you sure? You can’t tell…can you?} Tsugi pushed her chest out, gazing down at them as if assessing the thought of possibly giving herself a double mastectomy just to hide the fact she was a female.
This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it
Ellie rolled her eyes. {You’re already so flat chested, that when you bound them, it pretty much looked like your chest is concaved and not convexed.} She laughed. Tsugi gaped, but chuckled slightly, amused at her joke. {I’m just kidding, but don’t worry, your clothes are so baggy, he won’t be able to tell.}
{Thank you.} Tsugi sighed, feeling a little more relaxed. {Now, I’m just nervous about seeing him again after all these years. I don’t know how things will be.}
She chuckled and rolled her eyes. {You two will be just fine. Don’t think too much about it.}
Tsugi could see the gates around the corner and her heart started to thump loudly like it wanted out of her chest. Her breath was shallow and she placed a hand over her chest trying to soothe her erratic heart. The gates swung open and the orphanage was just as she remembered it to be. It still looked old and worn down, with vines growing up the side of the building.
Inside, it was still kept very clean and tidy. Children ran about the halls, heading to their next class as they screamed, shouted, and laughed.
“Welcome back darlins!”
Tsugi’s head snapped over to the counter to see Jenene beaming brightly at them. She had gotten a little older and wrinkles were beginning to form on the corners of her eyes. She still wore those huge ridiculous earrings and her bangles jingled loudly as she walked around to embrace Master Lumes. “My, my, my…look at how grown up you are!” She leaned forward to embrace Tsugi into her arms. “It’s so good to see you again.” She held Tsugi’s shoulders and pulled her away to take a good look at her. “You have grown to be a fine looking person.” She smiled and winked at Tsugi, but Tsugi’s eyes were too busy scanning the room. Jenene chuckled. “He’s not here darlin.”
“Huh?…uh…oh.” Tsugi smiled. She was so nervous before and wasn’t sure if she wanted to see him, but now she was disappointed that he wasn’t even here. “Where did Lugo go?”
“He said he had something to do.”
“Oh, ok. It’s fine, I have some things I need to take care of too.” Tsugi said, heading toward the door. “I’ll see you all later.”
{Where are you going?} Ellie tilted her head in confusion.
{I just have some things to take care of. Did you want to come with me?}
{No, I think Master Lumes and I have some things we need to take care of here at the orphanage.}
{Ok. Jenene knows where I live, so ask her to show you to my house later. You can stay with me.}
Since Lugo was busy, she wanted to use this time to go visit the graves.
Upon entering the house, she was surprised to find the place was still immaculate. Not a single thing was out of place and not even a speck of dust was on anything. Perhaps Aeris stayed here and cleaned. Tsugi walked to Val and Bel’s room, knocking on their doors, but there was no answer. She wondered if they were still living here too, or if they too had moved out.
She remembered Lugo telling Her to stay away from Val, so maybe Val isn’t here anymore. But what about Bel?
She opened the bedroom door, but everything was still in the same place as when they left fourteen years ago. Perhaps she was no longer here either.
She slowly moved about the house and allowed memories to flow back into her mind. Walking through, it was like everyone was still alive and well, talking and joking right alongside her.
Tsugi went and packed some ale and goblets into her bag before grabbing Ruzo out of the back yard. He was so big, he could just walk right over the fence.
As Ruzo followed Tsugi through the streets, they received a lot of stares and murmurs because of Ruzo’s enormous size, but they just ignored everyone and continued to the wisteria tree.
Upon reaching the top of the hill, Tsugi pulled out a ball and launched it far across the field and into the woods, sending Ruzo lurching after it. This time her chest was no longer sore from growing and she could throw as hard as she wanted. She smiled softly and pulled out four goblets, turning toward the graves, and freezing on the spot. There were already four goblets set upon each grave and recently filled.
Lugo.
Wide eyed, she quickly glanced around, but she didn’t see anyone in sight. She exhaled loudly when her hope diminished.
Perhaps it was just Jenene that paid them a visit.
She smiled wistfully and filled each of the goblets, placing them next to the other ones. She knelt to the ground and smiled while Ruzo came bounding back and halted next to the tree, panting tirelessly. Tsugi glanced at Ruzo, who had his long tongue hanging out with slobber strewn across his face, and she laughed in amusement.
“I hope you are all doing well.” Tsugi said quietly. “I’ve been off training for fourteen years, and now I’m back. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come visit. I’m sure you’ve all moved on by this time already, but I just wanted to come visit you anyway. Lugo’s back too, I just haven’t seen him yet. I wonder if he’ll remember me.” Tsugi’s fingers wrestled in her lap.
“That day…you said that there will come a day when I will want to tell him, and you said for me to be sure before I do, but I don’t know if I will ever tell him. He is a boy…or…a man now, and I’ve seen what men are capable of. And you also said that if he finds out, he may want to hurt me. I don’t want him to hurt me. I don’t want him to treat me any different. I just want us to stay the way we used to be.” Tsugi bit her lip. “I just have to make sure he never finds out. I can do that right?”
Not wanting to dwell on the thought any further, she let out a loud sigh and untied the ocarina from her belt. “I’ve learned to play the ocarina.” She smiled and brought it to her lips. Blowing into it, she started playing a serene tune, lifting her heart and whirled it into the air. It was carried away with the wind that danced around her elegantly. The more she played, the more the wind danced and waved with grace through the field and caressed her skin. When she finished, the wind slowed just like her racing heart as she exhaled feeling a little lighter…a little happier.
“That was amazing.” Said a gentle voice.
Startled, Tsugi quickly glanced up. A jaw dropping, handsome, silver haired man approached from beside Ruzo. His hand was caressing Ruzo’s giant ears. He was tall and lean, his shirt was tight against his muscles that bulged out of them and his armor fit snugly across his arms and chest. The sight of him was sobering.
“Lugo.”