‘How a spell matrix is built might change its polarity. The four cardinal points have an influence on magic. If you want to manipulate the trajectory, you must manipulate how a spell matrix is created.’

After staring at the words for a while, I ask for clarification.

‘It takes great proficiency to alter a spell matrix successfully.’

Holy-moly.

The book is mocking me now!

Incredible!

Yeah, yeah. Whatever. I’ll give you the damn proficiency.

“Can you alter how charged the polarity of a spell is?”

‘Yes.’

I look at the spell matrixes. By accident, I have discovered that to dispel magic, you need something like a sixth sense. Well, your magic. It’s like pulling strings out of them. Unlike most of the very scientific things I have learned so far, it’s pure instinct.

And so, I immediately dispel two out of three [Light] matrixes, and instead, I focus on one matrix right in front of me. I look at the familiar squiggly lines. In the beginning, it took me three minutes to create a [Light]. Now, after gaining much understanding from multi-casting, the casting time has become less than thirty seconds.

I’m on the verge of tracing the lines, but I suddenly stop.

Damn.

“Book, does the number of starting points you use to make a matrix influence its polarity?”

‘Yes.’

“I swear, you useless piece of crap,” I exit the focus mode, “what the hell?! Why wouldn’t you tell me that? What if I get stuck on something so stupid for a month? It was a random thought, but if I didn’t catch it, I would still be—”

I get zapped.

“For fu—”

Zapped again.

“You little piece of sh—”

Zapped.

My muscles are still spasming, and my jaw is clenched so tightly it hurts.

My father would have probably made an altar to this book. This was education-aimed physical abuse on another level. My parents would have probably funded whatever research that could have done the same in my previous life.

I still remember when they saw an ad for a watch that zapped you, or someone else wearing it, when they were not doing what they were supposed to. Thank God I was out of school at the time because I suspect I might have received a different kind of [Thunderbolt Curse] back then.

Now, not only am I getting zapped so much that I’m on my way to becoming a well-done steak for making the book notice its inconsistency, but the book has the courage to lecture me as well.

‘Talented mages should walk their own path. Asking questions is allowed, but freely gifting knowledge would hamper the progress on the path to becoming an [Archmage].’

I swear this [Archmage] stuff is driving me crazy.

But I admit I kind of see the point. Discovering things on your own is always more valuable than being handed the knowledge... unless you are going to be zapped to death if you don’t find out those things, I suppose.

Anyway, back to work.

I have the first component of one out of 529 Cantrips to figure out.

Just one thing.

The book says, ‘talented mages,’ right? But who’s talented here?

Isn’t my talent 23? Is 23 a high level, talent-wise? Because it doesn’t sound like much to me when compared to five-hundred-twenty-nine.

I would ask Lucinda, but I’m scared of the answer. What if I’m actually gifted, though? Would someone abduct me and bring me to the Nine whatchamacallit? That’s not going to happen, right? I mean, there wouldn’t be a psycho so out of his mind that would abduct me and—

Ok, let’s stop there.

Let’s not tempt Lady Luck again, shall we?

I start looking left and right, expecting a supervillain to pop up from nowhere and put me in chains in his/her basement.

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Now that I’m out of the focused state, the ‘her basement’ thing and the ‘in chains’ part has become a distracting thought. It wouldn’t be that bad if the supervillain was extremely hot, would it?

I mean, if Lucinda were to abduct me to learn my secrets… You know, do a little torturing, maybe a little spanking to make me confess. Then, when she sees I’m not caving, she could try to seduce me and…

Am I disgusting?

I wonder. I truly do.

Do other people have the same line of thought as I do?

For the sake of the argument, if a ‘disgusting’ scale existed, where would I rank?

Let’s say that the 1st spot goes to a serial killer maniac with deviant sexual taste. So, if that’s the first out of ten spots, are normal people like what, a nine? Ten, and you are, like, a Mormon. Wait, are Mormons kinky? Shoot, I have no idea. I wish I had a search engine on hand. Google. Or maybe Bing would be better suited for this research, if you know what I mean.

So, I’d say that at the 2nd spot, you are like a stalker or something, or maybe someone who would do something despicable to get his fix. Yeah, not killing, but harassment, perhaps. Or wait, does being depraved mean that you must harass?

The discussion in my head is getting too philosophical, and it’s clear why this world gave me a skill called [Deep Focus].

Case in point, I activate the skill again.

[Deep Focus]

Entering the [Deep Focus] state again, I notice how my skills have not gifted me anything as ‘active’ as ‘raising dough.’ They fall more into a ‘manipulation’ and ‘support’ category. Self-support, obviously, but still support.

The book does not want me to learn magic from its tit. Is this the foundation of a well-rounded mage gunning for [Archmage], or is it that everyone goes down this path? In my focused state, the former seems more plausible.

Whatever.

[Advanced Mana Sense]

I look at two matrixes levitating a few meters from me, and I pick out ten different points I could start from. I choose eight on one side and two on the other. It’s the clear imbalance that should allow me to see how this ‘polarity’ works.

But guess what? Manipulating the starting points of a matrix and filling them up with your Mana like that is much, much harder than I thought. Even when I scale back to only one spell matrix, I fail to fill up the wobbly lines more than once. And in the end, it’s only the seventh attempt that produces a good result. Even though, in this case, ‘good’ is a bit of a stretch.

The [Light] orb I created suddenly speeds up toward the wall, brakes, and starts moving again. It continues its choppy dance for about ten seconds before hitting the wooden wall with a soft thud.

What in the Holy Mother of Christ was that?

I summon another matrix, and, this time, I just stare at it.

I investigate the lines as if they could give me an answer.

Why was the movement so jerky?

The choppy movement seemed to come from the fact that most starting points came from one side of the matrix, making tracing the spell easier. I had simply put down more points in the direction I wanted the [Light] to move in, and they did indeed move that way but only jaggedly.

How am I ever going to get a circular motion out of that?

But that’s a different concern, and [Deep Focus] brings me back to the staggered pace.

The very first time I was learning how to cast [Light], the book highlighted how important time was. Therefore, the dimensions I’m working with are not just three. How much time you employ to trace a line influences the outcome. How much Mana you use for each line counts as well.

And how many points.

I take a frustrated breath.

Space, time, Mana, points.

Four variables.

Suddenly, a thought takes over.

Points?

Wait.

Points?!

I know what this is.

Holy Mother of macaroni.

This is goddamn Physics!

I want to pull out my hair one by one.

How can it be Physics?

It doesn’t make sense! No! Worse! It makes terrible sense!

I summoned ten [Lights] based on intuition, improvisation, and focus.

But wasn’t I simply manipulating different vectors?

I have a gut feeling.

St. Peter almighty, please shield my soul from those terrible memories.

The jaggedness comes from vectors.

I swear I have tears in my eyes.

Mr. Tchaikovsky is laughing at me from the other part of the universe, I’m sure.

Two words echo in my mind as I look at the spell matrixes, suddenly enlightened about what I need to do.

Wasted talent.

For God’s sake.

Shoot me.

I swear to God.

Someone, take a pistol and put three—no, twenty-three bullets in my brain!

I refuse!

I said, I refuse!

I still remember my Physics professor jokingly saying, ‘come on, Joey! Physics is more enjoyable than Math! It’s all about thinking, not just stupid numbers!’

A Physics doctorate student used to come to my bakery and hang out with me sometimes. The few times he talked about his job, I felt the primal need to choke him.

I don’t want to learn more Physics!

If I watch National Geographic from time to time, it’s only because I hope that one day, a tiger will maul the cameraman, and they will let us enjoy trash television in peace, without the need to watch a documentary to avoid feeling guilty.

If I need brainy moments, I reach for books. And even then, fiction or ancient epic poems. Non-fiction is for people who believe they will be the next Elon Musk. Bless them for trying, sure, but I’m not interested in your 4-hour workweek, pal.

I don’t want to optimize my life; I don’t want to run faster or learn better! I want to enjoy the time I have. That’s all!

And Physics is my archenemy.

But I’m forced to look at the matrix again.

Because now, I’m interested.

Goddammit, Mr. Tchaikovsky, you win!

That’s the worst. That’s how the professors tricked me: they would pique my curiosity, titillate my ego, and make me feel much smarter when I solved one of their stupid thingies.

And now, I cannot look away from the matrix.

I think I’ve figured out a part of the problem.

This ‘polarity’ thing is about making the vectors go in the same direction. But they are not firing at the same time. There’s not just a force behind them, which makes them go faster or slower, there’s an actual trigger, isn’t there?

This is utterly fascinating.

I don’t even need [Deep Focus] right now.

I simply turn on [Advanced Mana Sense] and stare at the world made of Mana in admiration.

If any scientist worth their salt could see what I’m seeing right now, they would soil themselves from excitement.

What’s a vector?

It’s like a bird that starts flying and pushes something or just goes somewhere.

It can push or fly; that simple.

Here, we have a bunch of birds flying away at the wrong moment, causing a chain reaction. Imagine a bunch of cars stuck in traffic, very close to each other; now, each car accelerates at a different time instead of moving when the green light is on or when the car in front moves. So, they bump into each other at irregular intervals.

I reflexively click my tongue, ready to tackle the problem with renewed curiosity and kinda hating myself for enjoying it.