I got up from the family sitting area, no longer able to tolerate sitting there. Bahruk was still reeling at the realization that I was living life on a tightrope between stability and death every day, and that every 2 months I would suffer a cataclysmic cellular breakdown. Tuleni was still just sitting there with mom on her lap, who I could tell was listening when her fake snoring halted a few minutes ago. Parents will always be the same: worrying about protecting their young. I could appreciate that, but right now protection was on the sidelines. I’ve been in and out of consciousness despite having my brain running on overtime for a day straight while my insides were being melted, so it was no wonder that my stomach felt like a bottomless pit.
I followed my ears and nose to the kitchen, from which was some mild taunting and the aroma of sweet fruity sugars. I didn’t bother making myself comfortable as I slumped over the empty half of the counter. The bickering came to a halt as three kobolds stepped around me with worried expressions. Mibata placed a hand on my right shoulder, Tokols pulled up one of the empty crate seats to my left, and Humey stood across from me with something in his glowing hands being cooked by his flame powers. Even without saying a word, these three helped repel the weight on my mind.
Mibata was the first to speak in a soft tone that contrasted his permanent irritated eyes. His hand brushed over a sore spot on my back, where I could feel a scale or two dislodge at his touch.
“Kay, are you alright?”
Tokols scooted himself close so he could lean over the counter beside me with his arms crossed over the wooden surface. His scales were a mottled array of greens and yellows, but a hint of blue was creeping in around his eyes. His voice lacked the usual chipper note it always held.
“You look better. Do you need anything from us?”
Humey adjusted his claws so he could have a free hand to rotate the contents of his pan and check it with a fork. Satisfied, he angled the pan so I could see the blue apple slices that had begun caramelizing.
“I’ve got some crisped zaganas here. Should be tasty. Want some?”
One glance was all I made for the slate on my hip, but I couldn’t dredge up the energy to move. This was relaxing, calming, and satisfying all in one, and I worried that talking might ruin the mood. My eyes slipped shut as something warm dripped down my cheek, then another on the other side. I was crying again, but this time I could feel my lips pull upwards in a smile. Somehow, being with these three made me feel like not everything was going to hell.
Despite me not writing anything for them, the three let out a collective sigh of relief. They must be getting that same soul-read power that mom has. Good, less writing for me. My arms and legs were finally returning to normal, which meant that I could gesture for a serving of food.
Humey plated me a scoop of the zaganas, which really were just zesty apples with blue insides, then did some mental math before giving me a double scoop. He knows from personal experience just how draining rampant energy in your system can be. Mibata and Tokols stayed by my side and told me about how eerie the marketplace was during moon-fall. Empty stalls, low foot traffic, and a gathering near the altar of those who were praying for the recently deceased. A bi-monthly day of the dead held in the darkness of the new moons sounded so honorable and mystic. Damn this place can be cool sometimes.
I was midway through my lunch enjoying the zing of the tart yet sweet fruit when my focus fell on the conversation behind me. The hushed, angry voice of Juaki snapped at the level and calm voice of Tuleni.
“You lied to me. Again. You said that Kayrux was going to be fine. You said she needed some time alone. You said that nothing bad would happen. Why do you tell her that she could have died in flames? Which is the truth, mother?”
“Both lies. Both truth. Uncertainty. Cursed rare, most perish before first moon-rise. Tuleni cared many cursed hatchlings, almost always dying young. Kayrux different: strong, healthy, Tuleni hope survive.”
“You hoped she would survive. What if she hadn’t? Would we have come home to her corpse lying on the floor, or would there be… pieces? We could have been there for her. You tricked us into leaving her to die instead of being by her side. Why?”
“Juaki would endanger family. Tuleni guessing, limited knowledge, took lesser risk. Kayrux magic enormous. Explosion destroy den, maybe more. Family perish together. Yes, Tuleni trick Juaki. Protect most, lose least. Only way protect.”
“I never requested you to intervene. You could have told me-”
“Told you? Asking now, what would Juaki done had known? Would let sons perish with daughter? Lose entire clutch? Tuleni knows. Nothing change, still abandon Kayrux. Drown sorrows in blood, lose sight, perish fighting monsters. You Karrawi’s daughter without doubt. Tuleni know Juaki thinking, father same way. Tuleni opposite. Better save daughter sorrows, lose love, never speak. Least she stay alive.”
Juaki made no reply, but Tuleni wasn’t finished anyways.
“Blame Tuleni. Not hate self, just Tuleni. Wanted spare you. Keep safe one last time. Juaki never want see Tuleni again, acceptable. Will avoid Kayrux and Juaki both. Transfer Tokols away, other healer. Tuleni not resist. Deserving such, lying old witch Tuleni.”
Until now I had resisted the urge to observe them visually, but the newly made silence of the room was haunting. I turned around to see the sight of something unimaginable, as Tuleni was in tears despite her stoic expression and was clutching at her robes, whole body trembling with each shuddering breath. Mom was leaned forward with her elbows propped on her knees, her hands obscuring her face as tears crept through the gap between her fingers.
No tug on my subconscious by the hand of fate was needed for me to see that these two were on the brink of severing their relationship for good. My brothers must have been able to hear as well, judging by how all three were now casting their eyes to the ground. It’s alright boys, there’s nothing you need to or can do right now. I was the cause of all of this, so I was going to be the end of it.
I stepped around the sitting pit until I was looming over my mother. She still had her face hidden, but I could tell from the way her tail twitched that she knew I was here. My thoughts on the matter were clear, and the writing slate was filled from top to bottom with my words. My own tail poked the back of her head, prompting her to peek over her shoulder at me. I dropped the plank as she turned around, forcing her to jerk back so she could catch it. This was the least aggressive way I could say “Snap out of it and read what I have to say” thing that I was willing to do.
“Grandmother Tuleni was just trying to protect all of you. That doesn’t justify her actions, but were I aware of the danger I presented at the time I would have done the same. I would rather die alone again than cause my family any harm. This is the second* time that she has saved my life, as well as the multiple times that she has saved my brothers. Even if you can’t forgive her, she is still a part of our family and I will not abide by any verdict that severs her connection to us. She has already earned my forgiveness, so you should let her know what she has to do to earn yours. If you can’t do that for your own sake, then do it for your sons that would have been saved had the worst come to pass.”
The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.
The air in the room was heavier now, as though someone had pressurized the area a hundred times its usual limit. Mom’s grip on the slate tightened until I could hear the wooden board groan under the strain of her strength. Heat began to rise from her in a column of hot gas, and through my mana enriched senses I could see her dragon flame swell to the limit for a brief moment. She let out a single steam-touched huff before tossing my slate over her shoulder and at my feet.
“Kayrux, this situation is much more difficult than you know. Tuleni has lied before and swore she would never do so again. She claims to be different from the elders but will openly betray the trust of her family. I do not care what her intentions were after betraying my trust once again.”
Tuleni had already hung her head in shame and was ready to accept her exile. Mom took another deep breath as she pinched the bridge of her snout.
“But… you are right. I am not one to speak in this matter. I wouldn’t have done anything different had I known the truth, and would have thrown my life away afterwards chasing redemption. She made the choice knowing that my fury was waiting for her. I will allow her the chance to repent and earn my trust again. I will decide on something specific later, for now I just want her out of my home so I may rest in peace.”
The seven foot healer rose from her seat without a word and moved silently for the door. I followed her while hugging my slate to my chest, my mind racing from the shock that I would stand up to my own mother like that. Did I help the situation, or has another knot been tied into the mess of problems between them? I couldn’t say for certain, but there was still one lingering thread in the bond between them, and for now that was all I could manage.
Tuleni stopped a few steps down the hall and beckoned for me to follow her. I glanced back at everyone else to see that mom and dad were now sitting on the edge of the bed while my brothers kept their backs turned to the drama. They were wise to not get involved, and I didn’t envy their awkward scenario. I skittered after my grandmother until I was able to keep her pace, which was remarkably slow compared to her usual speed.
“Kayrux. Many apologies are owed. Tuleni isolate you for Juaki sake, this mistake all mine. Failed to protect, only harmed once again. Should not earn forgiveness.”
We made our way to the railing separating our floor from the mile-deep chasm-like city below us. The hustle and bustle of the city was at its apex, though much of the energy was centered around the market above and the kitchens below. Tuleni leaned on a pillar as she looked at the living heart of the city with a wistful look in her eyes.
“Kayrux still defends Tuleni. Somehow dispel flames within Juaki. Truly powerful ability. Tuleni cannot understand written words, this weakness shameful. Tuleni still wishes to understand Kayrux. Despair, hopelessness, fear swallowed Tuleni whole. However, Kayrux saved against Juaki desires. Daughter of daughter, blessing upon family, Tuleni offers greatest thanks.”
Never before had someone with as many years of wisdom to their name been reverent towards me, nor had I ever had someone bow to me in such a grand gesture. Some people would probably take some smug satisfaction from this but to me it just felt weird. She ended the bow by looking back over the city view towards her clinic, a smirk playing at the corner of her mouth.
“Tuleni wait here short while. Haste unnecessary now. Would enjoy these sights little longer.”
That sounded like a decent plan if I’ve ever heard one. Tuleni leaned against the pillar to her right while I sat down with my feet dangling over the edge. Both hands were locked on the railing and my tail held firm to the pillar on my left for safety, but the feeling of calm was worth the proximity to a fatal fall. I didn’t let any thoughts bother me as I kicked my feet in the empty air, nor did I let my imagination play with my fear of falling. It was just me and granny chilling on the ledge with nobody around to bother us.
…
Tuleni grew tired of standing around doing nothing and returned to her clinic, but I was content to just sit there and watch the light fade from the sky as stars glittered to life and lamps mounted on the front of stores began to glow. The night vision kobolds had was phenomenal in its own right, but even the impossibly efficient darkvision couldn’t display the colors of the city in full vibrancy without some lights. As far as hometowns go this place definitely felt plenty lived in and rich with unique personality, as well as having a night life that I had yet to see myself. Even when they’re lizards, people will always be people in the same old ways.
I could have sat there for hours watching the world shift and change with the time, but someone coming up behind me was about to end my people watching.
“Hey, everybody wants you to come home. Let's get back before it gets cold out.”
Tokols was the one sent to fetch me, and he was polite enough to offer me a hand up and away from the edge of the floor. Now that I was actually focusing on my immediate surroundings the chill that was settling in the tunnels was finally noticeable as we walked home. I’ll have to make a system of measuring heat as well, won’t I? Perhaps some mercury can be found somewhere…
Nope, that’s too much thinking brain, we’ve had too much of that for today so we’re going to not do any more of that until tomorrow. Tokols caught a glimpse of my head shaking, and for a split second I saw his scale flicker yellow before he spoke.
“Something is eating at you the same as me, isn’t it? I’m going to guess it has to do with gran and mom having that fight.”
Well you’re not exactly on the right page, but your brotherly instincts are pointing you in the right direction. Even if I’m not being bothered by it, it might be prudent of me to hear his take on the situation. I give a halfhearted shrug and toss my hands to the side, a sort of “you got me” movement for him to discern meaning from.
“I’ve never seen Tuleni look so miserable. At work she’s always calm and collected, running the clinic like it was her own home or something even when someone is brought in with chunks missing and blood everywhere. Today I saw her actually break down, and now I’m afraid that she might lose the serenity that she kept whenever things went tailways. She’s the reason I chose to be a healer. I wanted to be like her, you know? Calm, collected, and skilled enough to patch up even the worst wounds. I wanted that for myself so I could be nearby in case something happened to my brothers or sister.”
It has been quite a while since I’ve seen Tokols be honest and genuinely sweet. I guess maybe all of this stress has been pushing him to the limit and even the barest hint of snarkiness was too much for him to conjure right now. If there was one role that I had assumed in this life that I had no regrets over it was being the shoulder for others to lean and cry on, especially when the one in need was my brother. I nudged him gently with an elbow before giving him a dopey smile with double thumbs up. He scoffed and shook his head as though he were unimpressed, but I could see that smile he was trying to hide.
“You’re such a weird sister, but you’re lucky I find weird things to be interesting. Still, you’re a great listener, and I mean that without any offense to your voice. You seem to hear what I’m saying and know what the best reply is, unlike Humey who’d fumble around and waste my time or Mibata who would try and do some verbal dance around me. I really appreciate that. Then again, sometimes I’m really just looking for a fight and those two are easy to rile up. Not saying that I wouldn’t fight you, like, if you wanted to spar or something, I just don’t want to annoy you like I do with them. They can be distracted by my tricks and charms and think that I’m just messing around again, but with you I know it wouldn’t have the same effect. It would probably make you sad, and that bothers me a lot. Great, now I’ve been rambling enough that I’ve said some things I really shouldn’t have said. Just… forget some of that, would you?”
Wow, I was not ready for an infodump like that! Maybe he opened up a little and the force of all these bottled up thoughts just forced their way out. Regardless of the how and why, the effect was that I had a level on insight into his inner workings that had completely eluded me for some time. His jabs and mockery were never directed at me, and every time he and I spoke there was this politeness that would preface everything. There was also the peek at the ingenious brain he had inherited straight from dad, which he used to delve deep into how his actions affected others. Such a kind soul. I couldn’t help but clutch at my heart with the brightest smile on my face.
He tried his best to hide his blush, but the main downside of his chameleon scales was that strong emotions painted themselves on his scales in a full showing, and his embarrassed color was lime green.From head to toe he was now a nauseating fluorescent green, which he attempted to hide by scurrying off to the back room in a haze of concealing magic. Mibata and Humey were able to track him with their eyes as he fled to the other room. A questioning glance was shot my way by each of them, but all I could do was raise my hands in defeat.