Orangeskull pressed his Diet Coke button repeatedly. He needed something to drink, right now. Within moments his gopher Jeffery came in with a fresh ice cold can of his favorite beverage.

“What took you so long?” Orangeskull demanded.

“I’m sorry Mr. President, I was in the restroom when you called,” Jeffery replied in a voice that was clearly out of breath.

“That’s disgusting. Did you wash your hands?” Orangeskull continued.

“Yes Mr. President, of course I did sir,”

Orangeskull pulled out one of his many single-use alcohol wipes and cleaned the entire can.

“Fine, go do something, I’m busy,” He finally said while getting up from his desk and moving to the couch to sit before the TV that he had delivered the day he took office, which was blasting his favorite news program at an unreasonable volume.

“Today will live in infamy as the death toll continues to rise after the attack upon the western states of America has decimated the electrical grid in the states of California, Nevada, Oregon, and Arizona. There has not yet been a statement from the Whitehouse but we anticipate a news conference later in the day.” The commentator said.

“Fuck.” Orangeskull said out loud, though it is impossible for anyone outside, or in the room to hear over the volume of the television set.

Orangeskull muted the news show and began dialing the number to talk to the hosts directly. The line rang several times before the switchboard answered.

“Good morning Mr. President, thank you for calling in, the hosts will be with you momentarily,” The perky woman who answered said.

“Thank you Roberta, how is your day going?” Orangeskull asked.

“Swamped Mr. President there is a lot going on. By the way, thank you so much for the flowers and chocolates!” She continued.

“Oh it was no trouble at all Roberta, I’m glad you enjoyed them,” Orangeskull replied.

“Alright sir they are ready for you, I am patching you in now,” Roberta concluded before sending the call to the hosts.

The interview was an hour and twenty two minute diatribe that rambled on aimlessly. Orangeskull watched the screen of the television constantly. He had shot from the hip the entire way through the interview. The hosts put some very valuable points together for him during the call. It probably was the Mexican government. They were retaliating for him closing the country to their hordes of Immigrants. It seemed likely enough.

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He called up Rudy. The phone rang a single time before he picked up. Rudy was good like that. To Rudy, Orangeskull was the world.

“Hey Rudy, let me run something by you real quick. You have the time right?” Orangeskull asked, knowing full well Rudy could be on the toilet and he would say he had the time while trying to be as quiet as possible trying to relieve himself while listening to every word that Orangeskull said.

“For you boss, I have all the time you need. What’s going on?” Rudy replied in a typically sycophant fashion. This behavior always warmed Orangeskull’s ego.

“Rudy, listen. Are you listening?”

“I am Mr. President. I am listening, tell me,”

“Rudy. That electrical thing, the attack on the West coast. Rudy. Do you think it was Mexico?”

“I don’t know about that, I mean that doesn’t really seem likely, I mean. Across the border they are having electrical problems too. If they attacked us, they would have, well they wouldn’t have hit themselves right?”

“No Ruby, you’re missing the point. Rudy. It was a bomb Rudy, it was a bomb, and it was a new weapon if they used it. So, what I think is, they fucked up Rudy, they hit themselves because they didn’t know what they were working with, I mean, we haven’t heard of anything like this before, did you?” Orangeskull said at length, hearing Rudy mutter confirmations of his theory while he was talking.

“I see. I see what you are saying. I mean, if they had some new weapon, they wouldn’t really know how effective it is, that’s uh, that’s what you’re saying?” Rudy bumbled through.

“Yes. Rudy yes. That’s it. Get someone on this. I need you to find out how this happened, because this is a real tragedy, have you seen the numbers? I mean there’s something like a hundred thousand people already dead from this Rudy, a hundred thousand Rudy. This can’t go unanswered, you know? The people expect us to do something and if Mexico was responsible for this, Rudy, if Mexico did this? We need to hit back hard. We need to hit back hard, Rudy,” Orangeskull ranted.

“I see. I see. Alright, well let me make some calls boss and I will call you back the second I found something,” Rudy concluded.

Orangeskull hung up without saying anything else. He finally unmuted the program and listened to their show with excitement as they started putting in reports with rumors that the attack may have been perpetrated by Mexico.

Within two hours there were late breaking reports of confirmations that there have been effects upon Mexico’s electrical grid as well, but there are also reports that this may have been an unexpected consequence of releasing the weapon of mass destruction within an area of effect that they had underestimated. There are no reports of a weapon like this ever being deployed anywhere, because of this, the weapon likely accidently hurt them as well.

Soon all of his favorite talking heads began echoing the thought. Orangeskull smiled. Within a week this will have stirred up enough rumors that no one will care whether it was true or not. The seed was planted. Tomorrow, he is going to order the national guard in each of the affected states to the border and be prepared for the Mexicans to attack with something more direct.

He pressed the button to summon Jeffery, he was in the mood for a Big Mac, large fries, and an apple pie. Why not treat himself?