Even though the girls never complained, nor voiced any doubts, with each step south, I felt my own trepidation rising. ’12 Hours walk south,’ isn’t a very good set of directions. Are we too far east, or north? What if we walk slow? Will we absolutely know the place when we see it? What if it’s beneath a trap door in the earth, like a bandit hideout? What if it’s actually a trap? The further we walked, meandering southward, the more doubts and reservations I had about this plan. Whose stupid idea was it anyway to listen to some idiotic voice in someone’s head?
“Yours, I’m fairly certain.” Casper laughed gaily as I almost jumped out of my skin from her voice suddenly entering into my mind once again, releasing all my pent-up tension all at once.
“Dammit,” I thought back, as loudly as I could imagine myself doing, “don’t do that to me!”
“I’m sorry,” Casper apologized, laughing in such a manner as to obviously show she was lying. “I just thought you should know you’re entering the land of the greenskins soon.”
“Green skins?” Worry once again began to flare up in the back of my mind.
“I don’t know what your people may call them,” Casper said, while giving the impression of a mental shrug in my mind. “They’re slow and stupid. Only tall enough to reach your navel, and with about twice the weight as your Shadow. Noisy little nose-picking fartbringers who have no concept of bathing,” Casper whispered in my mind, the feeling of utter disgust strongly emanating from her petite feminine voice.
Small green skinned creatures which smelled bad and were totally disgusting… My mind instantly conjured up the idea of goblins, which are such a common trope in almost any sort of fantasy story.
“Not those. I don’t know those,” Casper denied my suspicions.
A wave of darkness slowly overtook my vision, forcing me to stop and remain motionless so as to not fall and hurt myself. After a few seconds of being completely blind, an image of the highest definition quality possible, with smell and sound included, slowly faded into my thoughts.
In all the stories I’d ever heard, goblins were small humanoid type creatures with an appetite for rambunctiously breeding with women. Close enough to human, they could impregnate some poor girl into giving birth to a half-breed. These creatures didn’t look anything at all like those “little green men” with which my mind was familiar.
If I had to try and describe the beast which Casper showed me in my mind, I’d call it “the bastard spawn of Swamp Thing and green newborn baby shit”. Utterly disgusting, the creatures looked to be nothing more than some sort of humanoid plant creature – a combination of slimy vines and oozing green swamp moss. The smell and appearance of the beasts, even in my mind, was almost enough to make me vomit.
“Girls, I’m not certain if we want to continue on this way.” As the image slowly faded from my mind, my vision slowly returned. “Apparently we’ll be entering the domain of some sort of nasty boogermen soon. If I’d known this earlier,” I admitted, slightly annoyed at Casper, “we wouldn’t have came in this direction at all.”
“It’ll be dark as well soon,” Laulaia spoke up, reminding me of the time. The sun had nearly set in the west, and the moon was already beginning to shine in the eastern horizon. “Should we wait here until daylight comes again, so we can see better?”
“No. Keep moving,” Casper insisted. “The boogermen are more active when there’s more light and warmth.”
Sighing, I couldn’t help but shake my head from side to side. My shoulders slumped heavily from the weight which I could feel pressing down upon them. “I’m sorry,” I apologized to everyone. “but Casper says we should keep moving. These creatures seem to be almost some sort of living plant, so they’re more active when the sun is out.”
“Can we make it to your home by the time the sun rises?” I couldn’t help but be concerned about being in the midst of the creatures, exhausted and surrounded, at daybreak. “And will we be safe once we reach there?”
“The creatures won’t enter my domain, you have my word on that,” Casper snorted derisively in my mind. “As for whether or not you can reach my home by the sunrise, I can’t say. Can you guarantee that you’ll keep the same pace in the dark, in uncertain territory, with your nerves on edge looking for every noise that might go bump in the dark? You should be able to reach my home by the time the sun arises, but I can’t promise that. After all, t promise that. After all, you’re the one walking, not me,” Casper answered, laughing lightly once more.
“Even better news,” I groaned aloud, as I shared with everyone. “We’re going to have to push ourselves to keep up the pace in the dark, if we’re going to make it past the beasts by daybreak.”
“Then we best get a move on,” Alaina replied. Marching forward boldly, she led the way on south, eyes straining to search the horizon for any danger as she went.
“I can’t say I like this,” Laulaia sighed deeply, before straightening upright and then reluctantly following behind Alaina.
“Bowwoow-wooo-woo!” Barking happily, Shadow reminded us all that he was still here to protect us all, as he merrily ran circles all around once again, completely unconcerned over some plant-beast. A tree is just a place to piss on, in his opinion, after all – even if it might be a walking, flesh-eating, booger-tree!
Feeling quite reluctant myself, I hurried to catch up and walk beside Alaina. At the very least, I had to plant myself in the front, to face any danger first, which I might be responsible for walking us into.
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Fate is never as kind as one desires. Within a few hours of walking in the dark, we ran into our first obstacle – the ground grew damp and muddy. Moving on the slick mud, in the dark, was a task which neither Alaina nor I were prepared for. Laulaia, on the other hand, barely even seemed to notice.
“What type of magics did you say was on those shoes, again?” I remember Laulaia had mentioned they were enchanted, but I don’t recall her saying what they were enchanted with.
“Essence of a High Lady,” Laulaia replied, as if that explained everything.
“They change color, mend themselves, remain dirt and stain free,” Alaina expanded, seeing the confusion obvious on my face. “They allow one to walk across any surface as if it was smooth tile, and are soft, comfortable, and have the ability to help prevent or heal blisters and minor wounds on the skin beneath them.”
“Color change, Mend, Clean, Sure step, Blissful cloth, and Minor heal,” Laulaia replied, rattling off the names of the enchantments.
Half a dozen enchantments! And none of them are anything like the silly old +1’s or +2’s, like most of the games I’ve ever known. “Are they expensive?” Part of me was honestly curious about the cost; the other part simply wanted to drown out the creepy sucking sound the ground made as we pulled each step from the muck.
“Only worth about twice what I’d cost,” Alaina replied.
Twice the cost of… “I don’t think so.” Snorting, I couldn’t believe my ears! “You’re a priceless part of our family,” I assured Alaina. “I’d murder the man who thought he could trade a pair of boots for you, no matter how magical they are!”
“Awwww… Isn’t that sweet.” Laulaia sounded half jealous of my declaration.
“I bet he’d trade you for them,” Alaina joked.
“I’d consider it,” I half mumbled under my breath, knowing I was speaking loud enough Laulaia could overhear.
“Hey now!” Stomping daintily upon the ground, Laulaia vented her frustration and left me jealous. Even being jokingly forceful, her foot never got suck in the grasping grip of the mud.
“I’d really have to consider it closely,” I sighed, trudging wearily along.
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The second, and more concerning problem, we encountered, was Laulaia’s lack of stamina. Even without her struggling through the swamp as we were, Laulaia began to slow down halfway between midnight and morning. The vegetation was growing thicker with each step, and the muck and slime was now buried beneath rancid, knee-deep, stagnated water, and Alaina had taken to carrying Shadow in her pack again, as she had climbing up the cliff.
The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
The odor of the swamp we found ourselves trudging through was retched enough to make one want to puke, and our morale was at rock bottom as the sun started to color the eastern sky bright red and orange.
“I knew this was a bad idea,” Laulaia gripped, for the umpteenth time.
“Uggghh.” Whether Alaina was agreeing, or was just tired of listening to Laulaia, it was hard to tell.
“Wait a moment, guys.” Frowning heavily, I pointed to draw their attention to our left. “Did that Bush just move?”
Shadow, who had simply been whimpering pitifully to complain over his own fate being carried, suddenly perked up. Ears laid back, he strained to stand up in Alaina’s pack, and growl warningly.
As the Bush stretched and seemed to be waking from the glow of the morning sun, I sloshed forward through the swampy muck to meet it. With a mighty swing of my double-edged superaxe, I sent brush and limbs flying. “Move it!” Yelling at the girls, I could only pray that Casper’s home was close and we weren’t already dead and just didn’t know it.
“Go left,” Casper’s voice suddenly spoke up in my head, just as Alaina shouted, “That way,” and pointed to the right. Torn by a momentary indecision, I hesitated, allowing several muck-covered creatures to lumber dangerously close.
“Groooww woowwww woooo!!” Shadow’s frantic bark forced me to pull my thoughts together, and ignore both voices. We can move in a moment, for now, we survive!
Charging forward, I hacked heavily, repeatedly, at several slimy beasts which were only caricatures of human-like creatures. The extra-large axe which I’d crafted for felling trees for lumber, for our shelters, was these monstrosities natural enemy. Huge shards of wooden chips and vines flew left and right with each hack.
“Stay close!” Yelling at the girls, I could tell they weren’t fairing nearly as well with the beasts. Alaina was bobbing and weaving furiously dodging from one that was trying to lumberously wrap its slimy arm-like appendages around her waist. Hacking at the boogerman, with her hatchet, every time she had an opening, she was barely doing any real damage to the creature, as her reach wasn’t enough to carve deeply into its core. All she could do is slice at its viny arms and fingers, never really doing the creature any serious harm.
Laulaia was gripping her hatchet tightly, still protected in the center of our small group. Looking pale and exhausted in the early morning light, she lightly chanted words of power under her breath. As I hacked down another of the stomach-wrenching beasts, flames shot from her hands and ignited the creature harassing Alaina.
”Hiiiiiiiaaaaarrrrhhhhh!!” Releasing a high pitch, inhuman screech, the smoldering boogerman stumbled backwards. As it frantically beat itself with its muck-drenched appendages, the endless others that were advancing on us paused and took a step back.
“Now!” Hacking what I’d almost call a leg off another of the monsters, I dashed for the opening. Neither left, nor right, I took the only choice that was currently available – forward and out of the damn circle the slimy little bastards had trapped us in!
Grabbing Laulaia’s arm, Alaina half dragged her along, as she struggled to keep up.
“You have to turn left,” Casper reminded me, urgently. “The outer wall isn’t far, and there’s no opening that way. If you could fly, it’d be closer, but you have to go around.”
“Wall! What damn wall? How tall is it?” Making certain the girls were keeping up, and not falling behind, I struggled to concentrate on running and avoiding the shapes which moved so sluggishly all about, while trying to mind-speak with the ghost in my brain.
“Three times the height of a man,” Casper warned me. “Much higher than you can jump.”
“Sounds perfect!” Crumbled stonework was beginning to rise up out of the swamp, as the water levels were quickly receding with each step. Obviously, we were approaching some sort of intelligently-designed infrastructure. In the newborn light, the best I could imagine was that perhaps the area around us was once a road, or street, now fallen into disrepair and ruin.
“The bazaar,” Casper informed me. The unearthly calmness of her voice in my head was helping to keep me from succumbing to the sheer panic which was pumping adrenalin frantically through my heart. “When the city thrived, merchants would travel and set up camp outside its walls, to avoid paying that thing you people call taxes. The city allowed it, as the merchants smoothed and paved the land in front of the walls, giving them what they called a ‘killing zone’ in case of attack.
“All utter foolishness, like most things humans do,” Casper laughed. “In the end, it did nothing to save them from their own stupidity.”
Only half listening to Casper’s history lesson, I was relieved when finally the swamp was completely behind and I was jogging completely on cracked and crumbled flatland. If this was some sort of bazaar area in the past, all it was now, was a crumbing stoneway and dirt.
“There’s a wall up ahead,” I shouted back at the girls. “Alaina, you’re going to have to squirrel it quick. Get Laulaia up it as quickly as possible, while I hold any of those bastards off that chase after us!”
“On it, my lord!” Panting, Alaina failure to call me ‘lord-husband’ showed exactly how exhausted and frightened she was, as we quickly closed the distance towards what could only be called the ruins of an ancient wall. Is that damn thing even safe to climb?!!
Without slowing her stride one bit, Alaina took a running leap and grabbed for a jagged handhold about two-thirds of the way up the wall and began to quickly scramble up it, as Laulaia used the momentary break to lean heavily against the wall and catch her breath. Vines and thick cracks littered the worn gray stone, providing numerous hand-holds which Alaina used to climb up the side of the wall almost as quick as she ran across the flat ground.
“Does it look safe on the other side?” Shouting up at her, my heart was filled with worry that more of those murk-dwellers would be waiting for us to come join them for breakfast.
Disappearing from sight for a moment as she crawled over the edge, Alaina yelled back a moment later. “It looks clear! For the moment, at least!” Barking and howling from Shadow confirmed that he’d safely reached the top with her, while being carried along in her pack.
“Grab hold, my lady!” I had to stop my battle-driven impulse to hack at the vine which suddenly flew over the edge and dangled down from above.
“No time to get fancy,” I warned Laulaia. Since the creatures hadn’t caught up with us yet, I dropped my battleax. By the time it’d finished clanking on the ground, I’d gripped Laulaia tightly by her crotch and ass, and lifted her up as high as possible over my head. “Grab and hang tight!” I only had to support her weight for a few moments, before the rope pulled up and dragged her the remaining short distance.
By the time I had my ax up off the ground and slung back across my shoulders, the rope was back over the side and waiting for me. Grabbing it, I swiftly pulled myself up hand-over-hand, and over the edge, to the wide flat surface which was the top of the wall. Thicker than I am tall, the wall was easily wide enough for two or three people to patrol atop, side by side.
“There’s no time to rest, I’m afraid,” Casper warned me, as I lay there panting with the girls, trying to calm our heartbeats. “Even though they’re stupid, the beasts will reach the entrance soon. When they see you’re not there, they’ll spread out like a virus and cover everything. My home’s not far now – only about another half hour from here. You’ll be safe and can rest once you reach it.”
“Dammit.” Struggling to sit upright, I grabbed the vine we were using as a rope and tossed one end over the other side. “Shadow, you have to quit kissing everyone. Get back in the pack. We have to go.”
”Grrrrr woo woo!” Barking his displeasure at my mentioning the pack, Shadow backed up and snorted.
“I don’t have time to argue, you stupid mutt. Grab him, Alaina! Casper says we’re not safe and can’t rest here yet. It’s not much farther we have to go.”
“Boww woow woow!” Barking angrily, Shadow skipped back away from Alaina, and directly into Laulaia’s arms.
“Got him,” she yelled, as he barked and squirmed trying to get away. “Quick! He’s hard to hold!”
Alaina rushed to present her back, and the pack that was strapped across it to Laulaia, who unceremoniously shoved a squirming and fighting Shadow head first in it. All sorts of displeased growls and yips echoed furiously from inside the pack as Shadow twisted and squirmed wildly, trying to turn himself about. Even if he might be in it now, Shadow certainly was going to make certain we all knew that he wasn’t very happy about his current predicament.
Looking at how exhausted Laulaia was, I doubted she could hold and grip the rope long enough to lower herself down the other side. Grabbing the end of the vine, I wrapped it unceremoniously between her legs and around her waist, before tying it tightly. Lifting her like a sack of potatoes, I carried her to the edge and slowly eased her over it.
“Got the slack?” Yelling back at Alaina, I made certain she was ready to support her weight, before I let go of Laulaia completely.
“I’m on it, my lord!”
Hearing confirmation, I let go of Laulaia, forcing her to hold on tightly to the end of the rope and balance herself, as I rushed to grab the other end and help Alaina slowly lower her to the ground. Once Alaina felt her weight off the rope, the released her grip and waited for me to pull it back up to us. Instead, I simply tossed the other end over the side as well, leaving it for Laulaia to deal with below.
“We’ll climb down,” I told her. Alone, I doubted Alaina could support my weight, so I was going to have to climb down no matter what, and I’d already seen how easily she could squirrel her way up and down the rough cracks of the wall.
“On it,” Alaina confirmed. Never complaining, and seldom hesitating, she instantly moved to work herself over the edge and down the side.
Knowing it wouldn’t take a but a moment for her to reach the bottom, and not wanting to stress the crumbling side of the wall with the weight of us both, I took the brief respite to gaze out over the city. Ruined mounds of stone and collapsed wooden structures stretched out as far as the eye could see, cluttering vague outlines of crumbling roadways which seemed to head inward, like hubs on a wheel.
“The glorious city of the sun,” Casper whispered softly in my head. “They claimed to be the apex of humanity and as glorious as the sun which shines so brightly in the heavens above. The city was crafted after the sun – circular, with the roads emanating outwards like the rays. All pure stupidity, if you ask me, as the sun is nothing more than a large ball of fire in the sky. There’s nothing to admire about it, really.”
“Which way to your home?” Gazing out across the ruins, I tried to search for any sort of recognizable landmark.
“You’ll travel the road forward for over half the distance, and then the road to your right,” Casper informed me, sighing. “It truly has all fallen to shit, hasn’t it?” For a change, she sounded sad – almost wistful, even. “You’re close enough now that my voice can reach you easily. I can guide you around the rubble and boogerman, as you call them. As long as you move quickly enough, you should be fine, and I won’t have to step in.
“Now that you’re this close, I’m not going to let you get away,” Casper laughed, back to her overly happy natural voice. “If I must, I’ll deal with the aberrations,” she promised.
Sighing, I felt dread creeping heavily back up my spine at her mention of “not letting me get away”. The phrasing simply wasn’t one which left a warm taste in the mouth, like cookies and milk does. It soured, like molded orange juice, and made the stomach churn warningly at its approach. Unfortunately, it was too late to turn back now.
Climbing down over the edge of the wall, I hurried to catch up with the girls so we could finish the last leg of this journey to meet Casper.