I don't know at what point I stopped looking into her eyes. I unconsciously avoided her eyes by focusing on other things, like her chest. But now it's as if a spell has been broken, and I'm now aware of something I had forgotten, her eyes are not human, I am filled with fear and I dare not move a muscle.

I close my eyes.

I feel a hand on my face caressing me.

"Please, mortal, open your eyes, I will not hurt you."

I try to answer, but I can't, because I can still feel the glare of those eyes. I'm so scared I can barely move my throat.

"Why don't you talk to me, mortal..."

She is trying to calm me down, but I really can't, it's something primal within me, something that screams with all its might that I must not look into its eyes, that I must run, that I'm going to die.

I try to breathe, but I can't.

I can hear her crying. Her head is now in my lap.

Fuck! Move! Move!!! Do something!

"E...ey...eyes..."

She immediately answers.

"Eyes? What's the matter, mortal? Is there is something wrong with your eyes? No, that wouldn't make sense....unless"

I can feel her leaving, but I still can't move.

I'm going to die again? Before I can contemplate my second death, the pressure is gone and I can breathe again.

"Huff...huff...I...I can breathe."

"Look at me, Martin."

Ben appears behind me, but I run to the second floor without hesitation and barricade myself in my room.

"What in the flying fuck was that."

I'm huffing and puffing.

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"I couldn't even breathe, Jesus Christ, what was that."

I can hear Ben crying through the door asking me to open the door so we can talk, but I'm way too scared to even consider that an option, I should have run out into the street, this was a bad idea.

"Okay, Martin, think, I need a plan B."

Can I jump out the window? Was the front door the only one that connected to the real world? Mmmmm options, options.

Ben stopped banging on the door, in fact, she is quiet now. Did she give up?

I pressed my ear to the door to hear if she was still there, and all I hear is a quiet sobbing.

...

...

What do I do? My instincts are screaming at me that I should run, that I should jump out the window and get the hell out of here.

...

Why do I feel so bad? I mean, she literally told me that she wouldn't notice even if she stepped on me. She also killed me.

...

She did apologize for that.

...

Ughhhh I can't believe myself!

"Ben?"

"Mortal?"

"Mortal! Yes! I'm here!"

She responded immediately.

"Look, Ben, I'm not sure what happened, but I'm going to keep the door closed for now, is that okay?"

"Do you hate me?"

Do I? No, not really. It's probably the other way around, I'm not sure.

"No, I don't hate you, Ben."

"Then why don't you open the door??"

....

Why indeed.

"I'm not opening the door, Ben."

I can hear her crying again, but I'm not opening this door, My heart aches every time I hear her cry, but I can't... I really can't.

My legs are already shaking just by talking to her. Matter of fact, I wonder if there is something wrong with me, why I'm talking with her? I'm an idiot? I hear her crying again, and my reason is gone, yeah, probably an idiot.

"I don't hate you, Ben, it's just that... I'm afraid, I'm horribly afraid of you right now, I'm so scared that I can hardly control myself, if I see you again, I'll definitely run away."

She cries even harder.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry, but your eyes! When I looked into your eyes...they were so golden...they were so.... inhuman, something broke within me and I can't control myself, at least not right now, I'm so sorry Ben."

"You could see my eyes?"

She sounds pained and broken, but she also seems surprised.

"Yes? Very golden and very disturbing."

She falls quiet.

"Ben?"

I try again.

"I...see, yes, I understand now, you saw my eyes."

"I just said that Ben."

"No, you don't understand, you truly saw my eyes, eyes are the windows of the soul, mortal."

Her voice is still cracked, goddammit!! Why do I feel this way?

"Wasn't that just a quote of Shakespeare?"

"However, it is true, it seems you were a stronger medium than we originally thought..."

I saw her soul? Or at least part of it? If she is telling the truth then it would explain things, she keeps saying mortal this and mortal that but I've never thought too much about it...she is a literal eldritch goddess and I was stupid enough to gaze at her directly.

"Fuck!"

Oh dear God, how I'm alive? Fuck!

"Ben, quick question: how am I alive? Semele was fucking incinerated when she saw Zeus, so how am I alive?"

"This...you never beheld my true form, mortal, what you saw was only the reflection of my eyes through the eyes of this avatar I created."

What? Oh yeah, that makes sense, otherwise I'd be a puddle of red goo on the floor.

Okay, okay, deep breaths Martin.

"I'm sorry Ben, I'm sorry I ran away, but I'm scared."

She's crying, it's soft but I can tell.

"I...I will open the door, but I'm not going to look at your face, is that okay Ben?"

"Yes! Yes! You don't have to fear me, mortal! I will never hurt you!"

You don't have to, you don't need to want to hurt me, but you will just by accidentally stepping on me...

But I won't tell her that, I've already hurt her enough.

"I'm opening the door now Ben, just try to control your strength alright?"

She shouts at me excitedly.

"Yes! Yes! Now open the door so I can hug you mortal!"

Oh boy, what am I doing?

The moment I opened the door she tackled me and we fell onto the bed. She is hugging me tightly while burying her face in my chest, ah fuck, she is full of snot.

"—I will never harm you, mortal, and I will get something for my eyes! So you can look at me! And I will be careful! And I... And I will take care of you, mortal! Yes! I will take care of you!"

She's speaking so quickly I can barely understand her.

So I just hug her, I'm not really sure what to do in this situation, I'm still shitting bricks but at the same time I don't want to hurt her.

So I hug her tight while staring at the ceiling.