What was it again, the one thing I wanted to understand? Is there something I left behind, or something I need to remember? Was it something about my life or my death back in that world? What kind of turmoil of woes did I miss in my life and what I shouldn’t?
Our footsteps reverberate as it treads the paved path inside the fortress of the Gauls; the fortress also known as Siog Sciath. The sun is already sinking down far from the horizon and once again, the world is dyed in a crimson color manifested as pestering clouds that swam aloof in the sky. Despite the setting sun, the fortress is well illuminated.
This is a section of the fortress that was purposely left out earlier. King Cuh Rux is guiding me right now to the many of one place where I could witness that effect of the war. In the far right corner of the corridor comes a large door with the only sheet as a cover in the doorway. Slowly, the smell of iron; nay, blood, becomes even stronger.
It was so mordant that I instinctively cover my nose.
“Aster, what is it?!” King Cuh Rux worriedly asked.
“It wasn’t just blood. There’s this stinging and nauseating odor circulating in this hall.” It suddenly became harder to breathe. The smell was so putrid that my legs gave out on its own. My eyes even got teary because of how strong the stench is.
“Hey, hey! Get a grip! I really think we should head back! If the smell alone could incapacitate you like that, I don’t know what will happen if you see the wounded soldiers or worst, the one who just passed away…” King Cuh’s voice is rather melancholic despite doing his best to persuade me.
The scent in this place mixes together so I cannot distinguish any of it. If I learned something today, it is about how sensitive my nose has become. I was skeptical at first, especially when I am occupied with my own problem in walking. Right now, I have proven that my sense of smell excels greatly that it became detrimental.
“It’s fine. I just need to get used to it…” I assured King Cuh Rux as he helps me get back to my feet and firmly hold my hands so I don’t fall over. In the past, I had similar experiences and I can’t even count how many times I puked from such putrid smell.
“Well alright. Though I won’t let go of your hands now! I’m an opportunistic man so I’d want to have every possible situation favor to me as possible.” King Cuh Rux said as he interweaved his fingers with mine and raises it. “We look like a lover, no?” He chuckles.
“…So positive.” King Cuh Rux, without a doubt, is an optimistic person, even though I was just suffering from nauseousness a while ago. I can’t exactly tell how we look like a lover but it’s uncomfortable to hold hand with someone taller than you.
King Cuh Rux gave me one last look of worry before unfurling the scene behind the curtain. There, several men concocting medicines and such immediately beheld right in front of my eyes. It was a room with men clad in dirty robes stained with blood and grease. They were running around the place and keeping their body move.
Upon realizing that King Cuh Rux graces them with his presence, they momentarily stopped and bow their heads a little. After that, a man, possibly the facilitator of the place, approached us with a dim smile. His young countenance was ridden with fatigue and his eyes have deep dark bugs and he was hunching a little.
His eyes didn’t even wander in my direction despite my ears and tails showing.
“What would the the the the king wanted…?” He didn’t stutter. It was an obvious slur on his part that he repeated the same word. It was annoying but quite interesting.
“Lupus, I would like to check on the injured.” King Cuh Rux said straightforwardly.
“Ah, the injujujured? The death toll has already spiked thothothough. There are also who are are are are now dying. Would you you you you like to see?” Lupus asked with a sullen glare and points at a large door that seems to be the ward.
“Very well, let’s go.” King Cuh Rux and I are led by Lupus. This place was the facility where they develop medicines on the site and use it to treat the soldiers. Since healing runes are costly, they made leeway by using the forest’s rich resources.
Each and everyone in the facility has the same morbid countenance. They are moving their hands deftly and their precision with the processing of the medicine such as extracting, filtering, and compounding are well executed, however, it was robotic and none of them even had the passion for it.
I thought that the smell of the blood wasn’t that strong from the outside and it mixes with something else. Now I confirmed that the brewed herbs here are the cause of taming the smell of the blood but in exchange, it intensifies something even more nauseating.
Through the facility, we move to the next room; the main ward inside the inner sect of the Fortress. There are five different wards and each gives a level of intensity in which the injured requires.
The outer sect of the fortress houses fosters two wards. All both for minor injuries and a place for soldiers who just have light fever rests. What by minor injury means is that those who had scratches, abrasion, and flesh wounds that aren’t deep enough. It was all treated by bandages and applying some ointment.
The middle sect of the fortress fosters the two more wards that exist here. It’s a treatment facility where a soldier who lost or broke their limbs goes. It was a ward where one’s condition can be determined if they can return to the zone or not. Their treatment doesn’t differ from the wards on the outer sect, however, an intensive care is imposed to watch the limbless or disabled soldiers.
And the inner sect houses the most severely wounded and injured which are fatal that can lead to death. The reason these soldiers are kept here is that the infection that this soldier may spread could be quarantined.
What came into my view as we entered the ward next to the facility where they process medicine, I witness a scene of what carnage would left.
An array of beds are lined up. Four, no, six dozens of beds are equally lined up along the walls. Half of the beds are only occupied and most of the beds aghast of a patient are eerie as bloodstains drench it. And throes of suffering are screamed.
“They they they they just came back from the zone and had the most serious injuries. I dododoubt they can be moved to midsection any time. Wear this this this safety mask for precaution. Later, I shall shall shall administer medicine for you and your companion, King.” Lupus handed us a mask similar to a gas mask. It was made of leather but at the same time, there are inscriptions on the lower edge of it.
“Aster, that’s a rune too. Spellcraft was used to give it filtering properties that clean the air that you’ll inhale.” King Cuh Rux explained to me before wearing his mask. After watching him stretches the garter and snapping it on his neck, I imitated him. I look back to Lupus and he proceeds towards the patients in the bed. I noticed that he himself is not wearing a mask.
“Ah, this one one one is dying now.” Lupus said as he unfurls the sheet.
There is…a man who is literally bellowing on his own blood. His skin no longer shows any healthy color and his countenance seems drained of life. His breathing is ragged that he can barely inhale any oxygen. There’s a rupture on his left flank as if a sharp object bisected it.
He is all tears while his lips tremble. His eyes are still ablaze but it hints dejection and anxiety. Furthermore, he doesn’t a right leg and two of his fingers on his left hand is missing.
“King, my King! You—You’ve come…I…” the man started speaking towards King Cuh Rux. He tries to reach out to King Cuh Rux with his right hand and the king grasps on it with passion full of nobility and valor-ridden
“You have done well, Northern Post Soldier, Third Platoon, Erloc. The zone has become disarrayed but your heart is still adamant from the empire’s influence.” King Cuh Rux said as he locks gaze with the man called Elroc.
“I’m…I…I want to see…my…young boy and wife!” The man strongly requested King Cuh Rux. Despite spewing blood from forcing himself to speak, the man, Erloc, manages to bring out his desire.
It’s brutal and tragic; both words that seem to be synonymous, yet compliments each other. Stripped of the theatrical mask, the man bares his true face in the face of death. Desiring to see what pinches the heart the most was the most basic and most daring a man could request.
Erloc was bleeding all over and the bandages can no longer keep the wounds closed. The bed sheet slowly dyes in the color of fresh blood. Lupus did no action. His eyes already tell that this man is beyond salvation. Even if a healing rune was used, it will only prolong his suffering. It has become an inevitable time for him to die.
I’m not indifferent to it. I’ve seen and heard a lot about this. A man on the verge of death; knows that his time has come; are the boldest, earnestly wishing for a last string of happiness; if not, despairing for it and mulling over their life.
That’s also the reason why they can pathetically cling into their lives…
“You can’t see them.” I bluntly said to the man as I remove the mask blocking my lips. “You can’t see your family, not now; not even after your death.” I added with a strong emphasis on after his passing. King Cuh Rux who was having trouble on how to answer the man looks at me with a perplexed countenance.
“You don’t want to see them after your death, right? That would also mean they perished. You don’t want them to see you in this state. You are just going to engrave an awful memory to your son. Let the people here take care of your carcass and deliver you clean and prim for your beloved to mourn.” I told Erloc and his countenance changes from a despairing one to a realization of my words.
“…I…understand…but…” His face slowly broke down into a sullen stillness.
“You love them. Their faces should be vivid in your memories; lasting like the flow of time. Close your eyes and hold my hand. It should be as big as your son’s hands.” I hold onto the bloodied palm of Erloc.
“Ah…” Erloc obediently grasps on my small hand like it was his own son’s hand. He closed his eyes and a smile afloat his face as he started visualizing the faces of his beloved. Tears swam among the blood and his intense labored breathing starts slowing down.
“Tha--…” Before finishing a word, Erloc passes away in peace as a smile is painted on his lips.
His hand became rigid and firmly latches on my hand. Despite that, I still held on it as if he is still alive. The warmth of his blood outright sticks on my hand and it dries.
I greatly sympathize for Erloc.
His story and wishes may just be a grain of sand in a desert, however, it was genuine and fulfilling. His ending was bittersweet and all I could do is grant him a little, if not, minuscule of respite. I admired that he has a reason to cling to his life until the very end. His desperation was nothing like mine, not only this man but also dozens of soldiers alike in this room.
He had a desire I cannot comprehend, even now. All I could understand is that he held onto something important and that is his family. There could be other reasons but what’s important is that he had something that filled him and he cherished that.
This feeling erupting from my chest…was it envy?
He died with a purpose. He goes out in the field and did his job like what he was tasked to. He may have been born with a little to a better life than me. His life and grievance have outweighed anything that I have held in my whole life.
That’s why…at least…for his last moment, I would like to take a little bit of that feeling from him and take it as mine. Despite that, I gained nothing…
I understand nothing…
“Aster…” King Cuh Rux solemnly said as he places a hand on my shoulder. The sudden sensation of another touch abruptly made my knees and gaits weak.
“Ah…” My body collapses like a puppet whose string was suddenly cut. King Cuh Rux readily catches me in his arms cradles me while Lupus immediately detaches my hand from Erloc’s hand and quickly applied some ointment on it.
“My dearest, you have just proven that you are far worth than I can imagine.” King Cuh Rux said as he embraces me, however, I immediately realize that I am slowly being robbed of my consciousness. Apparently, Lupus also started sprinkling relaxant near my nostrils.
“Well, now now now, you shall need some special treatment.” Lupus said as he returns the mask I wore earlier back into my face. “That, right now now now, rest.” He followed. As the minty scent overrides the smell of the pungent blood and other chemicals around, my mind came to a complete stillness and I fell asleep.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As usual, I wake up in a soft and comfy bed designated only for me. The earthen ceiling reflects nothing but a shady darkness. A respite of the light from the spellcraft infused lantern keeps the room a little bit illuminated. I unfurl the lacey blanket laid upon my body and slowly fixes my posture to seat.
The smell of the mint still wafts in my nose that it rendered my sense of smell useless temporarily. The temperature is as cold as it gets for a nighttime in a forest. It was quite chilly and my bare shoulders shudder. I tried to feel what I am wearing and noticed that it’s just a cream one-piece sleeping dress.
“I’m glad to see you well, O’ Divine Beast.” A raspy but deep voice coming from the curtain of the darkness in the other side of the wall made me jolted in surprise. It was so sudden that my body bolted upright and my heart beats rhythmically fast.
“Ah…!” I let out a small squeak of flabbergast and while slowly turning towards the direction where the voice came from. I can feel cold sweat suddenly breaking out of my back because of this encounter.
“Calm down, it’s me.” Elder Iarann emphasizes as he walks a little bit towards the reach of the light of the lantern. His visage that was clearly colored in the crimson light of the lantern accented with the shade of the shadow made his countenance extremely ghastly and breathtaking.
“Y-Yes…I see…” I manage to calm down.
Elder Iarann walks away from the wall and retrieves a wooden chair in one of the room’s corner and set it beside my bed. He sat down with a deep sigh while pinching the bridge of his nose.
“At first, I really don’t have much of a thought about you as a person. You are only someone summoned as the counter force for the empire’s Divine Beast.” Elder Iarann ruffles his exceedingly long beard with one hand and took a stone from his pocket with the other one. “Take this.” He said as he handed me a brightly burning vial of crimson color.
“It’s…hot…! But…it doesn’t burn…” I exclaimed as I examine the fluid with glistening eyes. It was magical and really appealing to the eyes. “This is…?” I followed a query.
“Doiteain sent it here for you. It just arrived earlier. It’s called Doigh Bais, Doiteain’s personalized spellcraft solely for self-defense. The fluid inside is made of fire fae’s tears. It will burn a person when you throw the content in them.” Elder Iarann said as he rolled the vial in my hand and retrieve another thing from his coat. From there, a necklace made out of weaved roots emerges.
You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.
“This root…it must be from Domhan?” I tried guessing.
“You are aware now of our individual mastery? That’ll make things easier for me to explain. Correct, this is from Domhan, the earth’s vestige of protection. It is made from our last strand of Yggdra branch and Domhan crafted it into this necklace. It will protect you twice a day from harmful spells and magic alike. Take it as it is our will.” Elder Iarann places the necklace by my side.
They are called Elders of the Gauls, the Druids, because they deserve such a title. Doiteain is protected by four Faes of the fire. She has control over the spellcraft of fire and an expert rune crafter. The same goes for Domhan who has five Faes of the earth guiding him. Elder Iarann is the elder who commands the Faes of iron.
“…Why so sudden? I don’t think…I deserve any of this.” I said with a melancholic tone. Considering that they could use this in the war to save themselves and to even turn the tides…
“Why so sudden you ask. Initially, I planned to keep all of this and return it to their rightful owners, however, I’ve seen something in you. Naught of both dark and light, that lies inside you is an existence that’s not only worth what you are intended to be; you are one who yearns change.” Elder Iarann started talking things I couldn’t comprehend despite the words are logically understandable.
“I wonder…what change are you talking about…?” I mulled over his words. I have no recollection of trying to change myself. All I wanted is to find a path to gain a purpose, a meaning in my life. Since I am devoid of anything, my goal is as clear as the serene night sky.
“Whatever it is, you must be seeking something undeniably unshakable. We Elders do not wish to gain anything from you. It is this world that may gain something from you. After all…our fall…may even be inevitable.” Elder Iarann’s voice trails off and becomes weak at the end of his sentence. I could fully grasp what he said, however…
“Fall…what do you mean--!” My words; stopped. My worries; grow. Elder Iarann peeks a smile for me under the bushes of his beard.
“Tomorrow, I shall send you back whether by force or not. From there, a matter of plan will be at a motion. I can feel that you desire to involve yourself with us, especially in this war. That is, however, not allowed for me even if King Cuh Rux also bequeaths it. You shouldn’t find your own purpose in the midst of bloodshed.” Elder Iarann stood up from his chair with weary gait and a hunching back.
“…I see. I’ll obey.” I said those words, however, it was something with resistance. I never felt this hopeless before; not since then.
My tenth birthday was the start of my suffering, the hell I endured, the endless bickering and solitude that gradually turned into an icy flame that engulfs me. Two years passed, three years passed, or even further, that hell has become the very foundation of what I am now. Slowly, I embraced that solitude and learned how to cope with it.
Eventually, as I contemplated my life and a lot of things, I let go of unnecessary emotions. In the process, I left what creates a human ego, a desire. Eventually, I succumb to nothing but a bitter concept called emptiness.
There we no hopelessness ever since, however, that emotion gradually hits me.
“Ah, yes, Divine Beast. If you want to eat dinner, you can ask the guard posted outside for guidance. Or…if you will, would you want to meet King Cuh Rux?” Elder Iarann, before turning away from me, suggested some tonight’s options. I definitely not going to eat after today’s event, however, I want to meet King Cuh.
“Can I…meet King Cuh Rux?” I utter those words, with an emotion I cannot describe. Whether if it is longing or concern, I do not know but there was something in it.
“Verily, I shall take you to him myself.” Elder Iarann said as he opens the door of my room and beckons me.
Guided by nothing but lanterns made of spellcraft and moonlight that quietly fills the place by flashing through the windows, Elder Iarann and I walk not towards deeper of the Fort but towards where the west gate is. Basically, the place where I am resting is in the midsection but is located quite far from the soldier’s barracks and ward.
“What? It will be shameful of us to let you sleep somewhere near people whose at death’s door. Lupus had to use some runes to sterilize your whole body. Apologies as stripping you of your garments were necessary.” Elder Iarann said with a blank face, not looking to apologetic.
“If anything, I am devoid of the concept of shame…however, if you apologize, then it will mean nothing now. I will verily accept your apology.” For the sake of formality, for the sake of keeping their pride, I accepted the apology despite it warrants nothing from me.
After the brief exchange of words, Elder Iarann never spoke again and the atmosphere between us fell into a complete silence.
As we exited the fort’s gate arriving outside of the midsection from the west, a forest covers the scenery but the odd one out would be the wooden cabin. Light spills from the windows and it seems it’s only occupied by a few, if less, maybe one person.
Elder Iarann led me to the wooden cabin and knocked on the door. Immediately, the countenance of Kung Cuh wearing comfortable leather clothes comes into our view.
“King Cuh Rux, the Divine Beast willed to meet you. I shall now leave her on your care as I need to attend some matters.” Elder Iarann, after delivering those words, walks away in a steadfast stride.
“Ah, wai--! Iarann! Damn!” King Cuh curse fell on deaf ears as Elder Iarann didn’t even bat an eye towards him. He could only scratch the back of his head with an extremely troubled countenance. “Ah, no, I don’t mean you are a trouble! I know how sensitive you are to these words.” He added. I did start to feel like I was a bother but King Cuh immediately noticed my growing uneasiness.
King Cuh stands in front of the doorway while staring at me. His face seems a little flushed as the reddish cheeks are illuminated by the shimmering moonlight. He couldn’t look at me straight in the eyes and his fingers are restlessly fiddling inside his pocket.
I just felt like King Cuh is like a teenager rather than a proper adult at this very moment. I can at least distinguish how an adult carries their own selves and how teenagers are needlessly restless. Most of the young people I saw in the hospital, especially those who are young, are only fellow patients but I do know how they act when they are visited by someone they like.
As these thoughts circulate inside my head, a slight gust of wind blows and the chilly yet refreshing wind strikes my bare shoulders. It made my body shivers and my ear twitches from the sudden stimulation.
“Cold…” I muttered as I rub my shoulders in reflex. I can feel the tip of my ears getting cold and the fur at the end of my tail slowly stands.
“Ah, sorry, it was extremely rude of me to let you stay in the cold!” King Cuh panics and took my hand to let me into his cabin, however, I put a little resistance.
“It’s fine. I like the fresh air anyway. The cold, I can endure…and I want to gaze at this forest and bask in the moonlight since I haven’t had much chance in my previous life.” Instead of letting King Cuh pull me, I pull back the hand that was holding me. King Cuh shows a visibly flabbergasted countenance.
“I see…I see that you also have things that you like. Do you want to see my special place then?” With a sigh of relief, King Cuh offered to take me somewhere.
“I’d be glad to.” I answered gleefully as I sprout a faint smile. It was an offer I wanted to hear for a long time. I’ve never been out of the hospital for the passing years of my confinement so I’ve always yearned for someone to ask me out like this.
“Then, let me hold your hand.” King Cuh said and I obediently let him hold my hand. “Ah, wait.” He immediately added as he let me go.
He dashes inside of his cabin and sound of rummaging clanks from there. He returned shortly with a coat in hand and immediately offered it to me readily.
“Wear this! This is my prided coat made from a Nemean lion’s mane that I slew in the core of the forest. Please take it as yours now.” King Cuh said as he covers my body with the said coat. The coat is obviously bigger than me as it reaches past my knees and sleeves got past over my hands, however, it was thin, light, and warmed me up as soon as I wore it.
“Okay…thank you…” I said as I tug the coat tighter into my body as the cold slowly burns into warmth. The scent of King Cuh strongly seeps from this coat and the manly odor that he has enters my nose. I can tell that he uses this very often from the intensity of his scent. Blood and iron, sweat and pheromone, it’s all mixed up.
It’s odd…
Intimacy is something unfamiliar to me, yet, I know that at this moment, at this point in time, there’s this connection bridging us together. With our hands linked and only the calming silence of the forest night reverberates, the thought of such becomes even more passionate.
I couldn’t tell whether becoming this elated is a good thing or not at the current state of this land, however, all I could think of is that I am glad that I was once again given the chance to live a life; moreover, as a form desirable for people.
And…this rough and large hand that pulls me belongs to someone who I gradually admire, at least, that’s what I think for now.
Pulling…crackles…a minuscule amount of shock…warmth…
As if my mind as a child that I left started experiencing sensations that I thought I’ve long forgotten. It’s intense and unbearable as it floods like an overflowing river. Even now, I can hear that river gently flowing…
“Aster, we’re here. Look at this dazzling sight.” King Cuh showed me a river.
“……” I peered into the river that King Cuh showed me. It was really dazzling and the flow of the water made the reflection of the moon and stars dances in a limelight. It wasn’t violent but it just flows continuously without a care in the world. The bank wasn’t covered with rocks but an underlying formation of earth followed by grasses that grew adequately to be sat upon.
It is indeed a beautiful sight.
“Hahaha…well, I’m kind of embarrassed to say this now but…Aster, let’s chat.” King Cuh’s tone was a whole lot different when I met him earlier.
“I believe that’s what we are about to do.” I bluntly replied. I don’t think we’d be doing something else by bringing me here; not just to show this scenery.
“Well yeah, hahaha…” King Cuh said as he let go of my hand starts walking towards the river.
He didn’t stop at the bank but continued walking into the current of the river. It was not deep but it was enough to sink him up to his knees. The sight of him raising his arms in the air bedazzled me even further than the river.
King Cuh, at that moment, lights up in a fiery color of crimson glow.
“I am the one guided by the moon, Corcairdhearg mac Nessa the Sixth. I ask thee, the Faes of the Moon to bless me on my coming battles. Shine bright, for we are those who will depart from this world and your light is our guide. Bless upon our enemies as we will slay them honorably and show them the light of our victory.” I don’t know what to make of its meaning, however, it was clear that it is a prayer, a plea for victory, and asking for guidance and blessing.
“Pretty…” It was so captivating. Red lines-like mark starts appearing all over his body in crimson color. Awestruck, I lean on a tree and gradually slide down to sit. The faint illumination of the moonlight created a perfect harmony with the bright, contrasting color of red, weaving together and creating an illusionary aurora. After a few seconds, the light subsides and King Cuh settled down.
King Cuh smiles at me as he walks closer to me. The red marks all over his body are like a yesterday’s dream; vivid yet left no traces. The trees around gradually sway slowly and the leaves rustle gently as a passing wind breezes by.
“How is it? Cool right?” King Cuh asked as he crouches down on my eye level and beamed a smile with his teeth showing; kind of like a kid doing a successful prank.
“It was pretty, though I am curious of what it is for. It’s apparent that it was a prayer or a chant but is there a relevancy to it?” I blow out what was inside my mind. His sudden action may have been just to show off but I’d like to get deeper behind it if possible.
“It is as you said, it’s a prayer.” King Cuh admitted it and glances at the waning moon above us. “It’s a plea to the faes to guide us in battle but strategically-wise, it makes no difference when it comes to the zone where the faes’ presence lacks.” He added with a bitter smile, showing a tinge of frustration.
“The faes are an important entity to the Gauls. For them to be unable to accompany you in your struggles is somewhat sad.” The faes definitely play a big role in the Gauls. They are an everyday life companion of many. I knew that from the past days I live here.
“To be honest, it’s frustrating to be in such disadvantage. To us Gauls, the very forest, this place, is the home for the faes. Our ancestors fostered this home for generations and yet, those empire wanted to trample on our people, on our tradition, and our very meaning of existence.” King Cuh sways his head away from me as his lips frown.
“I…want to help…” I utter with a resolve, however, King Cuh only latches a hand on my head.
“I don’t know but…Aster, since meeting you, I’ve had this growing feeling in my chest. It is something extremely fond of you.” King Cuh said as he cocks his head closer to mine. “I’ve always wanted to feel you, Aster. I want to touch you. I would like you to answer to this desire of mine.” He added as he gazes at me with passionate eyes.
“It’s fine…” I answered with a little bit of resistance, however, I do not have much of an option. I told to myself to give everything I have to them if an opportunity arises. If King Cuh desires me, I’ll do my best to embrace him back.
“Thank you…” King Cuh uttered as he lunges closer to my body.
His other hand slowly creeps into my back and suddenly…
“Hngh…!” An electrifying sensation that made my guts jolted assaulted me. It’s weird and scary but at the same time, it was stimulating my whole body.
“I see, I see! Doiteain was right. These are…fur of superb quality!” King Cuh exclaimed as he ruffles both my ears and tail. The tip of the triangular fox ears is simulated as he lightly pinches the tip and felt the edges while the tail is assaulted with countless taps and dabs.
“…So this is what you meant…” I uttered in a whisper as King Cuh kept his assault on my ears and tail. Eventually, he fluffs my tail by burying his face on it. His face is like a child seeing a new present. The way he looked at me must be because he was stealing glances at these features of mine.
“Even the greatest wolf could not hold a candle to this! This is simply an extravagance, a true beauty a hunter would kill for!” King Cuh kept muttering to himself as his face is painted with pure bliss.
“King Cuh Rux…C-Cuh…” I tried calling out to his name. Upon my distress voice, King Cuh snaps out of his daze and jolted on his back. The sensation was too overpowering for me so I just have to stop him.
“Ah, I deeply apologize, Aster! It was just too mesmerizing that I got indulge in my own thoughts.” King Cuh lowered his head in apology. Is having an ear with demerits really that attractive? Humans are structured to have biological perfection that you cannot see in animals. These fur-covered protruding ears are getting in the way because it’s sensitive and ticklish and the tail is nothing more than a hindrance for my movements.
King Cuh, upon paying me an apology, sat beside with his unfading smile on his countenance. For several minutes, he didn’t speak; I didn’t pay attention to his expression as I watch the river flows. Eventually, fireflies started flying around and their hum fills the place.
Even when the wind blows, warmness abodes as the coat of the Nemean lion that King Cuh gave me provided with me with both comforts with its lightness and passionate warmth.
“I’m really sorry, Aster…” King Cuh said in a clear voice, as if merging with nature.
“It’s really fine.” I replied readily.
“That’s not it. What I mean is…for falling too hard for you. Was it that bad?” King Cuh confessed to me. This isn’t the first time I heard him offering his love to me, however, the word coming out from his lips right now aren’t empty words. This time, it’s filled with honesty and sincerity. “I’m definitely in love with you.” He followed
“Wanting me to be your wife at first was because of my appearance. What about now?” I asked out of curiosity since I knew he was just pursuing me for what I look like.
“About now…Well…” I turned to look at King Cuh but I was taken aback from what I saw. His face is reddened from ear to ear and his trying to hide his lips with his face out of embarrassment but he intently peers into my eyes. “Aster…well…I find you really adorable at first. To be honest, I kind of like to have you like a trophy but now, I’ve seen how pure and strong your heart is. My conscience cannot defile that beauty rare to an individual. Sure, there are other aspects of you that I still don’t know but, I know for sure that you are not a bad person.” King Cuh stated those words without breaking contact with my eyes. It was heartfelt and his words made my chest thump for a reason.
I still don’t know anything about how people currently perceive me. What King Cuh said about me could be a disparity of what I think about myself but hearing those kind and gentle words that I’ve never heard before had me in a spiral of confusion. Should I be suspicious or should I be happy about it?
Delving into my feelings, I’m pretty sure I am delighted but at the same time, I can feel the fear quivering for rejection and abandonment. I have forgotten how to feel happy but at the same time, the presence of sadness also disappeared. If both of those feelings are to be served to me in a platter, I’d be too full to take any.
“Aster, one more time, won’t you marry me? I will make sure to take care of you for the rest of your life and will vow to the Faes that I will make you happy.” King Cuh takes my hand and strongly grasps it. His proposal, once again, is abrupt and way too quick. I am happy for his feelings, however…
“I have to refuse.” I answered with a blunt tone. It was a response that automatically came out of my lips. I am happy that someone feels this way for me but there’s one thing. “King Cuh, I cannot accept a confession of a man. Despite my current appearance, I’m formerly a man too. For now, I still haven’t adapted anything a girl should think of in this situation.” I explained to King Cuh.
I’m sorry…
It was an excuse I just thought of. I cannot express any desire or similar feelings for King Cuh.
“I see…hehe…hahaha…Hahaha! Yes, that’s exactly it!” King Cuh broke out in laughter with tears spilling from his eyelids. It was quite a bizarre reaction so I tilted my head in confusion.
“…Are you disappointed?” I meekly queried while casting another gaze at the dazzling river. It’d be really a disappointment if someone you like told you that they are a former man. For me, thinking of reciprocating King Cuh’s feeling is not impossible, however, I lack any mental preparation.
“No, no, no! What I mean about this is…Aster, you are a very logical girl. Of course, you’d be thinking of this factor. I am aware that I am rushing things here so I won’t push anymore. Instead, I’ll wait…until the time you finally asserted yourself. When that time comes, I’ll make sure that I’ll put a ring in your finger.” King Cuh said with a delighted tone. For some reason, I can feel something welling up inside of me from his words alone.
“…I do wish too that I can come up with an answer.” I muttered while hugging my knees. My cheeks are oddly warm and the thumping in my chest becomes faster.
After that, King Cuh and I idly chatted in the midst of the night, continuing with entertaining talks such as our world’s culture and wonders. He told a tale of his exploits and his views as a king and a tyrant to his people which I agreed upon. In return, I talk about modern science and advance technology that my world has which greatly mesmerized him.
I honestly had fun. I cannot see anything disagreeable with him and I can feel that he feels the same way. But every fun ends at some point. Before we realized it, the sun came rising and Elder Iarann comes for me.
I agreed to be taken back to the castle and that’s what the objective is. King Cuh and I bid farewell with each other as I ride on the carriage. My desire to see Domhan and Doiteain was left unanswered but I have filled been anew with satisfaction.
In this Fort of fairies, there are things that I’ve witnessed and learned. This war has done nothing to the people but anguish. I can at least tell that it is what it is. A separation from loved ones, never again to see them; it is something foreign to me, at least, before coming to this world.
This slight emptiness in my heart tells that…I am longing for people that I have associated with.
I can tell that much…
The fleeting sight of the fort was the last thing I saw with my eyes as I immediately fell asleep in the carriage.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It’s been three days since I’ve returned to the castle. I haven’t seen any of the elders or even King Cuh. There were no signs of the war’s woes here but I can still hear rumors spreading around. It was a mostly negative premonition of its end.
Doiteain once told me that she wanted the surviving citizens of Gauls to take up residence in the Kingdom of Madd. If that option isn’t viable, they at least wanted help from the Ecklan Kingdom to repel the Empire of Rousse.
Those two are their only hope and it was a little relief that there’s no heavy expectation weighing upon my shoulder but at the same time, the desire to do something burns inside me.
After all, King Cuh and I are…
“Please excuse my intrusion Lady Aster!” A voice of a woman called out to me. It’s probably the soldier guarding my room.
“What is it?” As I replied, the soldier came inside hurriedly and gave a polite bow. Out of the people in this castle, she’s probably the one talk the most since she is my personal aide and guard. Her appearance is reserved but her eyes are fierce and dutiful.
“A news…just arrived…” She said to me but there’s something holding her back. Like her tongue is twisted into knots.
“Please tell me.” I urged her in a gentle voice but she further pursed her lips. Sweat broke out from her forehead and she’s clenching her fist as if to make it bleed.
“It’s...just that…the news that came…the content is…” Her eyes swim around, looking restlessly from left to right. Her countenance is ghastly and her shoulders are trembling.
“Please…if it is about the Elders or King Cuh, I must absolutely hear this.” I once again assured her that it’s fine to tell me.
“…King Cuh Rux, Corcairdhearg mac Nessa the Sixth, was assassinated while Elder Domhan was killed in the western fort. Reports…also stated that Elder Doiteain was captured…” The soldier said.
At this moment, I can feel it in my chest, something draining like a hole…an embodiment of emptiness, this fleeting emotion, this grudgeless frustration, tainting my mind with nothing but the shadow of my former self.