I've lost count of how many souls I've reaped. Four of them asked me to go to hell. Most were scared and hadn't realized they'd died, and some welcomed me. They were happy that someone came to take them away from this godforsaken mountain.
I wonder how Clover would handle the four that refused, mostly how he would have dealt with the religious woman. It feels like I've let her down. If I had another chance, would I have told her I was an angel on a mission from God? I feel dirty when I realize it might have been a better solution, to use someone's religion against them with false promises. Being stuck on this mountain had to be a bigger punishment.
I look around, I'm not sure I've been here before. After a while the places on this mountain look the same. At the edge of a cliff stands an old man, he watches over the mountain chain and is dressed in a black suit, on the top of his head lays thin, white hair.
He watches me with warm eyes as I approach him. He looks around eighty, and out of all the souls I have reaped today, he seems to be the most peaceful one.
"I wondered when it was time," he says.
The man gazes out over the mountain chain again. The sun is going down and soon there will only be the clear star-filled sky with its moon lightning up the night.
"You know who I am," I say; it almost sounds like a question.
"Yes, I have waited for a while now. I didn't think it'd be an accident that took my life." He chuckles like he wasn't speaking of his own death. "Tell me, is heaven this beautiful?"
Another religious person. I decide not to lie and hope that it won't end up the same way as it did with the woman.
"I don't know. I've never seen it."
The man's clasped hands rest against his stomach, he continues to stare at the view for a little longer.
He turns to me. "I am ready."
I pick up the soul stone from my pocket, it opens up and the soul-dust makes its poetic dance. The man smiles.
"Beautiful," he says before his face and body becomes soul-dust and slowly transfers to my stone.
I stand alone at the top of the mountain, a peaceful sorrow dances around my fingers before it continues in between the stones halves. They shut together with a quiet thud.
I observe the snow-covered mountaintop while I pick up the orange stone. The gate unfolds itself for what feels like the hundred time today. I do the same routine, think of the souls, knock, and open the door.
I step into the airplane – where we began. They're back already. Eclipse is sitting at one of the seats with her legs pulled close, so her knees touch her chin. Clover is leaning against one of the seats with his arms crossed.
"Are we done?" I ask
"Yes, good work," he says and smiles.
He actually looks like he's proud that I've been able to convince most souls.
Eclipse holds the soul stone in her palm while she moves her fingers over it with her other hand. "Clover, why is it that we cannot feel anything?"
"Because you don't have a body."
"But I felt pain after I died."
"That wasn't physical pain."
In his face there's the same annoyance I had seen whenever I asked my unending questions.
"It feels like it is," she answers absent-mindedly.
Clover looks at me with pleading eyes. "Please take over."
He continues down the airplane, opposite of the opening, and once I turn back Eclipse is smiling at me.
"Sometimes," I begin and sit down at the seat behind her, "you'll feel things, both pain and regular feelings of touch. Pain often comes if your soul is wounded – at least that's how I've understood it."
I stare at Clover at the end of the plane. He's extending his hand and lets the stone fall; it stays in the middle of the air and unfolds itself.
"There's even a place in the Eleven," I keep my eyes on Clover, "the well. If you touch the liquid, you can feel your own skin and whatever you touch for a few minutes."
Clover doesn't react.
"Really?" Eclipse asks, I turn towards her again. "You'll have to show me that sometime, Orchid."
Before I can answer Clover starts talking, "we have to deliver the souls. I'll leave Eclipse in the eleven. You can create a door to the hall of souls. I'll be there once I'm done."
I've never visited the hall of souls, it wasn't allowed under the apprenticeship. Clover always left me in the Eleven and then delivered the souls to the hall. I had not even known where or how they delivered them. Nor did I know how I could get myself there.
"And I cannot accompany you?" Eclipse asks.
"No, you can't. You're still my apprentice."
She grimaces slightly out of disappointment.
"And how do I get to the hall of souls?" I ask.
"The same as always. Think of it when you open or knock the door."
"I've never seen it, Clover," I remind him.
"You don't have to have seen it. It will know where it will lead you as long as your intent and thoughts are clear."
I sigh and get up from my seat with the gate-stone in my hands. Once I've created it, I knock while thinking of the hall of souls. Once I open it, I realize it's the same whirling darkness as always.
Clover leans closer and whispers, "If you ever by the well again, don't touch the liquid."
I turn towards him to ask what he means, but before I have the time, he lays a steady hand against my back and gently pushes me into the darkness.
I stumble into the hall of souls. It's a gigantic hall with dark blue walls, in the middle stands a large glass tube with thousands of small holes. Shining, light blue orbs hang in the air while they slowly move through the room like dust.
The gate behind me is gone and the stone lays on the floor. Once I put it in my pocket, I slowly cross the hall. It tickles my skin when the orbs float by my cheek. It feels peaceful, and it leaves a faint smile on my lips.
Around the glass tube sits a white, shining fence. It feels warm against my skin, like it has been heated underneath sunlight. I focus on the shining orbs inside of the tube, they slowly move upwards until I cannot see them anymore. It reminds me of the well in the Eleven, how it reaches far outside of the glass globe. This tube is the same, it continues out through the ceiling where I cannot see where it ends – if it even has an end. I've learnt to not put any logical explanations and rules in this world.
A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.
I don't know how long I stay there and think about life, before and after death. What it means to be reborn or reach the paradise. Paradise would be different depending on who you'd ask. To me it would be a place where I could live with my family and friends – whether they're dead or not. For others it might be reliving their favorite memories, and for the woman on the mountain it would be what heaven is described in her religion.
"It's quite spectacular, isn't it?"
I almost let go of the fence when I hear Clover's voice. I hadn't even heard him approaching, even though my own footsteps had echoed throughout the hall.
"You easily forget the time here."
Sometimes I wonder if my thoughts and emotions are still connected to Clover, or if he's just good at reading facial expressions.
"Did it take long?" I ask and my thoughts quickly drift to what he had said about the well, but I cannot yet show my curiosity.
"Not really. I took Eclipse to her room, then I headed straight here."
He takes the stone from his pocket, most of the soul-dust drift towards one of the holes in the glass tube. He follows the dust with his gaze as they enter the tube and twirls around each other as they float upwards. I let go of the fence and pick up my stone from my pocket. It does the same as Clover's did, and once it's done I put it back.
"So," I begin. I'm not sure how to phrase it without sounding too curious, "you said something about the well?"
"I did?" He asks with a grin.
I stare at him. "Be serious now."
"You'll have to be more specific."
He puts both hands on the fence and turns his attention to the tube.
"You told me not to touch the liquid."
"Ah... Yeah, I did say that."
I sigh.
"Stop being cheeky. Tell me why I shouldn't touch the liquid."
"You noticed why, didn't you?"
"No, in fact I didn't," I lie.
I had noticed it was a bad idea. The sorrow and desire that laid in that well almost made me jump in. Sorrow had always been something I hated to feel, that I willingly wanted to plunge myself into it was strange and alarming.
"Didn't you feel the sorrow? The desire?"
The playful tone is no longer there, now he sounds annoyed. Like this game was only fun for a while, now he's settled back into the usual grumpy Clover.
"Oh? So you've touched it too?"
Clover watches me the same way that Blomst had done. Like he's trying to figure out what I'm doing. For once it seems like he has no idea what I'm thinking or feeling. It makes me feel like I've won something, even though I thought I had made it clear to myself that I should move on from figuring out what's going on with Clover.
"I have touched the liquid," he admits, something I didn't think he'd do, "and I regret I ever did. How much did you touch, Orchid?"
"Just my fingers."
He seems relieved. "You were lucky. If you submerge too much of your body, it feels like your soul is ripped apart."
I swallow, it feels harder than normally. "When did this happen?"
"Long ago. I thought Blomst would tear me apart after the well had its turn. But she just cried with me, I was bedridden for weeks."
It's hard to imagine Blomst crying.
"I hate that fucking well," he says and the grip around the fence becomes tighter, "so make me a favor, Orchid. Stay away from it. It only brings sorrow and pain."
He looks at the glass tube. I have no desire to leave just yet, and I believe that Clover is thinking the same. We remain watching the soul-dust inside the tube. It slowly floats upwards. Eventually the silence will force us to leave the hall of souls, and I'll be forced to return to the Eleven. To my childhood's room, where I write down names whenever I have free time. I try to think of something to say, anything so that we can stay here for a while longer.
"Did you talk to Artemis?" I ask.
He tenses up and focuses on an orb that floats past him.
"Yes, I talked to her."
It surprises me, I had honestly thought he wouldn't.
"How did it go?"
"She was upset that I couldn't explain anything, she thought she had the right to know..."
"Why don't you tell her? I can understand why you're not telling me anything, but I thought you two were closer than that."
It's low of me to put it that way. I know it will hurt, but it might also be exactly what he needs to hear.
His hands become tense as they grip harder around the fence.
"It's not that simple," he answers harshly.
"It is that simple, isn't it?"
"It's not. This is not about a right to know. Orchid, if you..."
His jaw tenses up, and he quickly turns around. I follow his gaze and on the other side of the room are two other soul wanderers. One of them is Nine, the man I occasionally see at the dining hall. He's dressed in the same striped shirt whose sleeves end slightly above his elbows. They show off the deep, open cuts on his arms. Once they're closer I realize the second soul wanderer is a guardian, just like the others he carries a mark on his forehead – three round gemstones in the same purple color of his eyes and make-up. The middle one is the largest while the other two are smaller. He's taller than both Nine and Clover, and likely over two meters tall. The straight, blue hair hangs over his shoulders. His facial features are sharp, especially his cheek bones. The foxlike eyes sweep over the room and stops at us.
Clover lets go of the fence but keeps the very tensed posture when we're approached by them.
"Clover," the guardian says with a surprisingly soft voice.
Nine stands beside him with the same empty gaze as he usually has whenever I see him in the dining hall.
Clover doesn't say anything; the tall man looks over at me and smiles.
"I've never met you. What's your name?" He asks and points a long, pale finger at me. His nails are painted the same purple color as his eyes.
There's something uncomfortable with him, something that makes me want to hide.
"Her name is Orchid," Nine answers before I can muster the courage to answer.
I'm surprised he even remembers my name; the one time he had addressed me he hadn't seemed very approachable or interested in holding a conversation. Yet he somehow was able to remember a name I never directly told him.
"Seems like Nine is your personal tongue," he says and smiles.
Clover grabs my arm, and the same warmth that I had felt when touching the fence forces itself through my thick sweater's material and touches my skin.
"We were just heading out," Clover says and pulls me slightly away from the guardian.
Yet Clover stays, like he awaits permission to leave the hall. I don't have to ask for the guardian's name. After everything that Clover and Cerberus have said, I know that this man is First.
"Let them go," Nine says and extends his hand with the soul stone.
"In a moment," First says while still staring us down, "you seemed to have a very deep conversation earlier. Why the sudden need to leave? You must have talked about something truly interesting, if our presence made you stop in the middle of it."
"My apprenticeship. We were talking about my apprenticeship," I answer before Clover can, "It's over, and we were just leaving the soul dust from my last contract with Clover."
"Curious, you can talk yourself, it seems," he says and chuckles in a way that makes it sound more like a scoff. "Of course, then I'll have to congratulate you, for fulfilling your apprenticeship."
He smiles, and I give him a short nod with pursed lips.
"You may leave," he says and waves his hand in a swatting motion.
Clover pulls me away from First and Nine, whose stone opens up. The soul-dust that comes out is not like ours. It looks the same, but it doesn't have the same poetic pattern in how it moves. It's chaotic and unpredictable.
Clover stops at the other side of the hall; in his hand he's already holding the gate stone. I open my mouth to say something, but when he glares at me I close it again. The stone folds itself out, and this time Clover doesn't knock. He tears open the door and won't release his grip on my arm as we step through.
I had expected the eleven on the other side, but when I step outside I see a green forest. A path made of large logs cut in the middle leads up a hill, where gigantic trees stand on each side. Between them hang bridges of rope and wood. They lead to different buildings, whose round windows are home to a warm light. The sky is different too. No glass globe, no eternal light. It has already started to darken.
This is not the living world; the creatures and the magical appearance gives that away. But this feels more alive than being stuck inside a glass globe, where the grass is of the wrong color and the trees all too strange.
I take a few steps forward.
"Damnit," Clover mutters behind me. "I didn't think this through. I just wanted to leave. Your apprenticeship is technically over, so it shouldn't be any problem."
He doesn't sound as sure of himself as he seems to want to.
I study the hill with the gigantic trees and its buildings. How moss covers a large part of the houses. Some of the buildings are created from the tree's stem, and some of them are built around. I cannot stop staring and wonder how I'd rather live here than in the eleven. But then I might have hated this place too, I after all thought the Eleven was beautiful.
"I can take you back to the Eleven," Clover says like I didn't have my own gate stone.
"No."
"No?" he asks and frowns.
"I don't want to go back yet. You did tell me you would show me the Oak once my apprenticeship was over."
He sighs. "Yeah, but maybe not right now."
I ignore him and start the path made of logs. In the Eleven there's all kind of creatures, here it seems more themed. One of them is a large brown creature whose back have a thick layer of moss attached to it. It looks like a long cape that is dragging itself against the logs. Another creature is small but plump with a red mushroom as a hat, it looks too big for its little head. It keeps correcting it with its white arm. Many of them have antlers that grow out of their heads, while others are green with moss and bark growing on their skin.
"Orchid!" Clover calls out after me and soon catches up.
He grabs my arm and it looks like he's ready to ask me to go home, but once I turn towards him he must realize that I need this.
He loosens the grip. "If I show you around, will you promise to go home afterwards?"
"I promise."
He lets go of my arm.
"Alright, then I'll show you what the Oak has to offer."