Novels2Search

Chapter 45

“Our Skills allow us to do incredible things, but even they have limits. We see the potential for seemingly endless Advancement and sometimes lose ourselves to possibility by ignoring the moment. The most successful men and women I have met were not necessarily the best at surpassing their limits, but at understanding them.”

~Unknown

“Absolutely not!” Amy’s response was cold enough to send a shiver up my spine. She’d rushed out of her farmhouse before we even made it to the door, cutting us off with a face carved from granite. When Tina tried to explain the situation, Amy interrupted her. A low rumble grew in the back of Vigil’s throat at the offense, but a sharp glare from Tina was enough to silence the looming hound.

“Amy, Will wanted to-”

“I do not care what your boy wants, Tina.” Again, the rebuttal was swift and dripping acid. “How dare you come here and try to force the issue. We have made it clear what is best for Jusep.” There was a break to her voice that grew more pronounced as she spoke. I was reminded of the sheer torment I heard in Amy’s wails when she first laid sight on Jusep after the attack, the desperation.

Something is wrong. The thought, the feeling, sucked the air from my lungs. I finally noticed the state Amy was in. The disarray of her hair, the bags under her eyes, it wasn’t- it shouldn’t- why did she still look so raw? Jusep was supposed to be recovering, right?

“Amy… what…” Tina must have noticed it too. Amy was ragged. She was defeated. It was too much for Tina, who rushed forward and pulled Amy into an embrace. It was like the breaking of a dam. Sobs wracked Amy’s body and her knees buckled under the unexpected rush of support; Tina made sure to hold her up, and just let the woman feel what she needed to feel without judgment.

I feel like I am intruding on something I shouldn’t be…

Amy’s vulnerability caught me off guard. Everything about the situation caught me off guard. I had prepared myself to talk down an overbearing parent, not… Not this.

Tina was speaking softly to Amy, and I couldn’t make out what she was saying. Fudge had wandered over to me and bumped his head against my shoulder, having sensed that something was wrong with me, too. My eyes drifted towards the house, and the slightly ajar door.

I have to know.

There was no way we would force the issue, not after what Tina was seeing, and if Amy still insisted on not telling us…

I have to know.

The adults were distracted. It felt awful to refer to what was happening as such, but for my purposes, it was accurate. I worried running might alert Tina and Amy, so I walked towards the house. Each step felt heavier than the last.

Amy continued to cry. Again, I was reminded of her wails. I hadn’t thought of them in so long, too long. I knew they would keep me up that night. Fudge tried to trail behind me, but with a practiced gesture he stayed back. He sat and watched me intently as my hand gently fell upon the door. For some reason, the feeling of the wood grain made me cognizant of how dry my mouth was feeling.

No time to delay. It was amazing my gambit had paid off at all. I was expecting to hear Tina call out or suddenly feel a hand on my shoulder any moment. I didn’t have time to second guess myself. I pushed open the door and stepped into the house.

It wasn’t the first time I’d been there. Back when we were still having our weekly playdates, we visited Jusep regularly, so I knew where his room was. The sound of my rapid footfalls followed me through the house before I came to a stop in front of the door I needed.

No time to delay. A feeling of dread settled in my stomach, but a flash of mana from Perseverance banished any lingering hesitation. I had to see for myself. I opened the door.

I hadn’t seen Jusep in person since the incident. The last time I saw him, he’d been bloodstained and battered, his injuries barely contained by Vix’s magic. Tina still hadn’t fully explained how that had happened; I’d honestly not thought about it in months given how much had been happening. I didn’t dwell on it at that moment, either.

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I couldn’t, because I saw Jusep.

We’d been lied to. Or at the very least, I’d been lied to. I’d been told that Jusep was going to make a recovery, that he’d be fine. I never expected it to be a full recovery, but… Jusep wasn’t fine; he’d survived. There was a difference.

A small pile of pillows propped up Jusep’s frame. He was thinner, and he had already been a thin kid. His cheeks had sunken in somewhat. I couldn’t see under the covers over his legs, but the shirt he wore had one of the sleeves folded up and sewn closed. I saw the scar that ran across the side of his face; it was already starting to fade, if only slightly.

Jusep turned towards me, reacting to the sound I made when I stepped into the room. His hair had been combed, but some of it shifted and fell partially over one of his eyes when he moved. I noticed a brush on a small bedside table, its handle partially hanging off the edge like it had been put down in a hurry.

Jusep looked at me, but said nothing. He just… stared. There was barely any reaction at all. He then turned back towards his window, like I wasn’t even there.

“Jusep. Hi.” My voice cracked slightly and I felt the mana in my core space start to churn. I pushed it down. My Skills could have helped me, but I felt like I would regret it if I let them do so any more than I already had.

There was no response.

“Jusep. Hey, Jusep.” I took a few shaky steps towards the bed. Jusep turned to look at me again, but there wasn’t any real recognition in his expression. It stayed flat, like he was looking through me, not at me.

Withdrawal. Disassociation. Trauma. Several medical buzzwords that might explain the situation flickered through my mind, not that I was in any position to make a diagnosis. All I knew was what I could see. Jusep was a brat at times, sure, but he was a kid. Kids are supposed to make mistakes and be rough around the edges. I didn’t like kids, but I never blamed them for being what they were.

Jusep was so full of life, and now…

It’s like he’s gone. My breath caught in my throat as emotion overwhelmed me. I couldn’t even tell what emotion it was, only that it was formless and suffocating and-

Perseverance responded to my subconscious desires and fought back against the tide. I had frozen up, but I couldn’t afford to do that, not then, not there. I would save it for the night.

“Will!” I heard Tina shout from outside. I was out of time.

I ran forward and grabbed Jusep’s hand.

“I am so... Fuck.” I swore in English under my breath, momentarily forgetting myself. Even with Perseverance helping me act, it didn’t mean that my actions would be correct. What would an apology accomplish? Jusep didn’t even flinch.

I heard the sound of heavy steps thundering towards me.

“Get away from him!” Amy screeched and I felt her nails dig into my arm as she yanked me away from her son. She flung me backwards and I felt the air rush out of me as I collided with the doorframe.

Pain erupted from the point of impact, so I drew on Recovery and Perseverance. Mana flooded my body. I was too stunned to consider how I wanted to draw on the Skills, it was like a knee-jerk reaction. It was sloppy, but it was something. The pain dulled, somewhat, and I felt my lungs draw in air easier than they had been moments before.

If I hadn’t already Advanced, I probably would have broken something. From outside, I heard Fudge start to snarl before a loud bark from Vigil cut him off. Tina was kneeling next to me, even as I tried to pull myself up.

When did she get here? She wore a complicated expression, and when she spoke it was through gritted teeth.

“Will, are you hurt?”

“I am fine,” I lied, but stood up to prove my point. It hurt like hell, but the steady stream of mana from my Skills made it manageable. Seconds had passed, if that, and Amy was still checking over Jusep as if I’d somehow damaged him by being in his presence. “I-”

Tina scooped me up before I could say anything else.

“Will, we have to leave.” Tina said, and she rushed me out of the house. I didn’t even have time to register what was happening before we were already rushing back the way we came.

“Mom, we-”

“Will. Please. Not now,” Tina gripped me even tighter as the dogs fell into pace beside her. Her voice was strained, almost a snarl.

Oh…

I didn’t complain any more. I had to let Tina remove herself from the situation. I watched as Jusep’s house shrunk into the distance behind us. I willed my mana output to slow. I only had so much of it, after all. The pain in my back ratcheted up a notch, but it was manageable.

I know, academically, that this is not my fault, but… It was hard not to face down regrets when faced with a kid so broken by circumstance.

What made it worse was the feeling that I couldn’t do anything to help him.

Unless… The seed of an idea began to take root in my mind. I tried to focus on it to distract myself from the pain. It didn’t work.