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Chapter 30: Duck Soup

The tide of ducks slowed and finally ceased in the face of Ammeline's flashing rapier., and as soon as the wave of ducks ended Ammeline disappeared in a flash of light, reappearing moments later floating in the air behind Quakfina.

“Hey! This is cheating! Did I shine so brightly to allow me to secure my victory would have blinded you, you....duck...angel...goddess...thing. What are you exactly? Regardless, you can't just...”

“You won,” Quakfina said.

“I what?” Ammeline blinked.

“You won. You defeat the challenge of the Storm of Wings, through dexterous skill and quick thinking. You will float here until the rest of your friends pass their own challenges, or fail them.”

“Oh.” Ammeline said. “Well yes. Of course. Of course I won. Ahahahaha. Do you hear that everyone? You only need to be half as magnificent as me, and we'll be on our way to Kyle and Jenny in a minute or two!”

“Interesting,” Betty said. “Ammeline's skills were truly the perfect ones to face that test.”

“Yes of course,” Quakfina said. “I am conjuring tests to challenge each of you.”

“Then why not tell us who each test is for?” Trevor asked.

“Because determining that is part of the test,” Quakfina said. “The next test is the Cube of Corners. You may all work on the answer, though only the person who actually solves it will be granted the victory.”

She waved her hand and an enormous sphere appeared in the air between her and the group riding the enormous duck. By this point none of them were surprised that the sphere was a solid mass of ducks.

“Wait,” Evan said. “I thought this was Cube of Corners. That is a sphere. It doesn't have any corners.”

“That's the puzzle, obviously,” Tanya said, squinting at the sphere. “Somehow we need to turn it into a cube. Maybe it needs some kind of magic to make it...”

“THAT DUCK!” Evan and Goldie said at the same time, both pointing at the same duck in the upper right area of the sphere. They looked at each other and glared.

“I saw it first!” Evan said.

“You did not!” Goldie snapped back. “Besides, I'm the one who figured it out without a magically enhanced brain!”

“What are either of you talking about?” Trevor asked, his arm around Betty's waist.

“It's a packing puzzle,” Evan said. “The trick is to find the way the shapes fit within the new box...in this case, an imaginary cube around the sphere.”

“The ducks are all different shapes,” Goldie continued. “See? The way they hold their wings, the way their beaks are pointed, the number of visible feathers, they're all different. So there's only one possible combination that makes a sphere, and only one possible combination that makes a cube.”

“And the only duck that isn't blocked from moving is that one,” Evan pointed back to the duck they had been discussing. “So that must be the duck you have to move first.”

“A rapid beginning,” Quakfina said. “But seeing a possible first move does not count as solving the puzzle.”

Evan and Goldie glared at each other.

“That one next!” they both pointed, speaking in perfect unison. “Tuck it's wing under the beak of the first one to make the corner! Then the one down and to the right is loose! Pull it out and use the tail too....”

Fifteen minutes later, a cube of ducks had appeared in the air before them. Evan and Goldie were both panting, still speaking in unison.

“Turn the last duck upside down,” they wheezed. “DONE!”

They both fell back against the duck, panting and wheezing.

“I win,” Evan said.

“Like hell!” Goldie snapped. “I just did that without any powers!”

“Slower than me.”

“By like a couple of seconds!”

“She said whoever actually solves the puzzle. I did. So....”

“I'm gonna break your god damn face you smug little--!”

In a flash of light, they both disappeared and reappeared floating behind Quakfina.

“Ties are possible,” the mystical duck woman said.

“Screw that!” Goldie shouted. “I still won!”

“Yes you did,” Quakfina nodded. “And so did.”

The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

“I'll pluck you like a Christmas turkey,” Goldie growled.

“Your friends are very violent,” Quakfina turned to Tanya.

“I'm feeling pretty violent myself,” Tanya said. “Do we have to continue playing these games?”

“You could try matching me power for power,” Quakfina arched an elegant eyebrow.

“I already know that's pointless,” Tanya grumbled. “Just send out the next test.”

“Very well!” Quakfina said. “The next test you will face is the Path to Glory.”

“Which we can assume will be duck related,” Betty said.

“Yes of course,” Quakfina said with a bow. “This one is much more direct. All you need to do is walk the path and get past me.”

“Didn't you and Tanya just agree none of us could beat you in a straight fight?” Trevor asked.

“I will not attempt to stop you,” Quakfina said. “They path will do that.”

She waved her hands and spread her wings, and from the light of her feathers flew five huge ducks. One red, one blue, one brown, one gray, one white with sparkling feathers.

“Flying will not be allowed,” Quakfina said. “You must walk the path and step on every stone.”

“Every duck,” Betty said.

“Well yes,” Quakfina said. “For the purpose of this test, ducks are stones.”

“So we just jump from duck to duck?” Trevor said.

“That is the idea.”

“I think this is me then,” Trevor said. “I think I'm the only one with the physical abilities to make the jumps. Are you gonna be okay?”

“I will be fine,” Betty said. “I did not become helpless because we started dating. And while your desire to protect “your woman” is laudible, seeing as you have not even yet let lust overcome you...”

“Alright alright,” Trevor smiled, kissing her on the forehead. “I get it. My fault. I'm sure you'll smash whatever your test is. I'll be waiting for you.”

Trevor turned and took a running jump off Corbin the Giant Duck and towards the slightly less gigantic ducks hovering in a stepping stone pattern up to Quakfina. His foot landed on the red one first, and it exploded into flame.

“Crap!” Trevor said, jumping off and landing on the brown one nest. Thorny vines exploded from it, lashing at his legs and ankles. He let out a pained shout and jumped across to the white one, which exploded in a storm of razor blades. Again he jumped, bleeding from cuts on his legs, to the blue duck. He braced himself for another attack.

Splash.

He didn't land on the blue duck, he fell through it like it was the surface of the water. The duck's outline exploded like a ball of water, then reformed. Trevor, on the other hand, started plummeting towards the ground.

Corbin dived and swerved to catch him, landing with a thud on the giant duck's back.

“That sucked,” Trevor groaned, laying his head in Betty's lap.

“Is my lap so uncomfortable? I had thought my thighs were quite pleasantly...”

“No this part is pretty good,” Trevor said. “I was talking about getting cut and burned by magical ducks and almost falling to my death.”

“Oh yes, that makes sense.”

“I think this one is for you, Tanya,” Trevor said. “That's way too much magic for me.”

“I mean possibly,” Tanya said thoughtfully, looking up at the ascending pathway of magical ducks. “I'm pretty much limited to the nature and ice elements, right now. If this is a test for me it might be about expanding my elemental control....”

“No not nature,” Betty said. “Wood. That duck is made of wood. Trevor, I am going to need my thighs back. Although alternate methods of placing your head between them can be discussed at a later date, should lust overcome you.”

“I'll keep that in mind,” Trevor said, sitting up and letting Tanya stand. She summoned Moonlight, who erupted into his tiger form.

“Wood, Metal, Water, Fire, Earth,” Betty said. “The five elements of classical eastern alchemy, just like my five elements cat. This test is for me.”

Betty climbed on Moonlight's back and jumped. He turned red as he landed on the red duck, and no flames attacked him. Brown for the brown, blue for the blue, etc, until she had leaped up the entire ascending stairs of ducks and leaped past Quakfina. In a flash of light, she joined the others hovering behind the mystical duck woman.

“Well that wasn't so bad,” Trevor said, getting up. His legs were still bleeding, but not too badly. “I guess the next test is for your or me, right?”

“It would have to be,” Tanya said.

“Well let's see what we've got.”

“Champion of the Waters,” Quakfina said, waving her hand. What appeared in front of them was...

“Okay this is getting ridiculous!” Trevor said, as the enormous muscular man with a wrestler's build and the head of a duck appear, standing on the back of Corbin with them. The duck raised a gigantic fist. “What is it with the ducks?”

“The duck is a powerful and ancient totem!” Tanya said, a little defensively.

Trevor pulled his fist back and punched the duck man in the beak. The duck reeled backwards, but replied with a swinging fist. Trevor caught the duck man's wrist and pulled, twisting his hip, until the duck man was forced to the ground and completely immobilized.

“.....This was meant to be a test of physical strength,” Quakfina said slowly. “But I was sure the guardian I had summoned was....”

“You forgot to factor in his martial arts training,” Tanya said. “You were thinking in terms of testing everyone's magical abilities. But Trevor was a good fighter before he had any powers.”

“I suppose you're right,” Quakfina said. “But that wasn't all I was testing. Trevor, of course, passes.”

Trevor disappeared in a flash of light and appeared behind the goddess. Only when he arrived there did he realize the others were having a whispered conversation.

“...isn't she the one keeping us in the air?” Evan said.

“Corbin can cath us!” Ammeline said. “And I've had quite enough of this duck woman. I say we do it.”

“There is a certain interesting element to the plan, but...”

“What are we talking about?” Trevor hissed to the others.

“Attacking Quakfeathers or whatever her name is from behind if she decides not to let us through,” Goldie said.

“That sounds like a bad idea,” Trevor said slowly.

“We've come through too much by this point to let her screw us over!” Ammeline said defiantly. “And I'm worried she won't play fair with Tanya. Doesn't this look like the kind of thing which could all turn out to be a cruel joke?”

Trevor thought it over. She wasn't wrong, he could see it going that way.

“Alright,” he said. “What's the plan?”

Unaware of the conversation going on behind the mystical duck woman, Tanya stepped forward on Corbin's back.

“So alright,” Tanya said. “My turn.”

“Yes!” Quakfina said, spreading her wings. Holy light glowed from her feathers and her eyes as the rose above, glaring down at Tanya. “Your test...is already passed.”

“W...what?” Tanya stammered. “When? How?”

“Your test was to stand up to me in the first place,” Quakfina smiled down at Tanya. “Merely by demanding the tests, you have already passed. You are not wrong that you need to have a discussion with your father. By the ancient pact, I was forced to test your friends. But the shape of the tests was up to me. So I let them each show their ability. But you...your father does not know what he needs to do with you, although he thinks he does. Go. Challenge him. Your friends are strong. Trust them to...”

“GET HER!” Ammeline shouted, and the floating crowd of them tackled Quakfina from behind. The duck woman's eyes widened in shock, her power faded, and she along with all the others who had passed their tests plummeted out of the sky.