A thousand people really wasn't that many, and with food, clothing, shelter, and apparently even entertainment pretty much taken care of, there didn't seem to be that many demands on the time of the ruler of such a community.

As such, when Elendar approached the front door of the central hall that the Queen of the Dark Gardens ruled from, asking to see the Queen at earliest convenience, the guards simply opened the doors and let us right on in.

The hall was big, big enough to comfortably fit all the thousand drow inside twice over, and even more if they were willing to squeeze, but it was, in all honesty, somewhat plain, with the only real point of interest being Queen Selva, sitting upon her throne at the end of the hall.

"Ellie!" Selva cried, standing up.

"Selva!" Elendar replied, as the two ran forward towards each other, meeting in the middle and... kissing passionately?

"The transfer of power in the Dark Gardens is usually amicable," Carbon said. "But this, well. This is new."

Elendar and Selva pulled away from each other, breathing heavily.

"I went to talk to Elendar after the election," Selva explained. "Wanted to make sure there were no hard feelings."

"I was a little upset at the time," Elendar admitted. "But, well... I couldn't stay mad at her for long, and that passion had to go somewhere."

"It's helped ease some of the tensions," Selva said. "Why be mad about your candidate losing, when she clearly isn't? The Kissing Queens, they call us. But!" Selva paused. "Wait. Elendar, what are you wearing? Where did you get all of this?"

"I showed the Archmage Lucifer Morningstar to our silk production chamber," Elendar said, preening and showing off her new clothes. "And she produced this with the contents of a single silk vat and an existing standard-issue dress. She is amazing with those machines of hers."

"Well well well, looks like someone's angling for a trade deal," Selva said. "In that case- welcome, outsiders, to the court of the Queen of the Dark Gardens! I am Selva, the current Queen. How may I help you?"

"My name is Kara Nukem," Kara said, stepping forward and practicing her spiel. "Bastard of Ariel Nukem, and rightful heir to the title of Duke Nukem. And I have come to you, arms open... seeking friendship."

"Friendship is nice," Selva said, nodding and returning to her throne, as we all followed after her. "But tell me, Kara Nukem-" Selva sat back down in her throne, and leaned forward, steepling her fingers. "-what exactly do you expect from your... friends?"

"I'll have to tell you a story for it to make sense, if you'll allow me the indulgence," Kara said.

"Go right ahead," Selva said. "Time, we have in spades."

"As you can tell, I seek to take the throne of Nukem, and displace the current Duke- an unstable, unfit madwoman who everyone hates," Kara said. "Should I succeed in my bid to become Duke, I will be sovereign over the land of Nukem, and able to grant great boons to those who have supported me in this bid. Boons such as space in the heartland of Nukem itself to build a bigger, better, and open-air Dark Garden, where the dark elves may freely walk the earth, beloved by their neighbors and their Duke, a strike against the dark elves being a strike against the Duke, and responded to in-kind."

"Hrm... So, you want us to support you in your bid to overthrow your relative, and in exchange, you'll help us establish a surface settlement?" Selva asked. "Have I got the right of it?"

"You do, Your Majesty," Kara said.

"Of course, we would also be your people, with you as our ruler," Selva pointed out.

"Nukem already has a city that elects its own leader, who then interfaces with the Duke and holds some sway over the throne," Kara said, shrugging. "It wouldn't be terribly difficult to have another."

"Hrm..."

"In exchange for land to settle on, the Dark Garden would be, in the long term, liable for taxation- a small, negotiable proportion of the community's production being given to House Nukem," Kara continued. "As a forward thinker, I am quite willing to charge no taxes for a time while the new Dark Garden grows to fit its new environment. And, of course, Lucy simply loves helping people in ways that let her show off how smart she is; I'm sure you could deck out every single person in your community in finery such as Elendar's within the first two months."

"This is very tempting, I must say," Selva said. "We do want a place on the surface to call home, where we can be safe from persecution. But... I do have to ask- what's the catch? What do you want from us right now?"

"Right now, I want three things," Kara said. "I want a formal, recognized treaty, contract, or promise that you and your people will become my vassals and live in my realm. I want an appointed representative of your government to accompany me and my entourage to Manor Nukem to confront the reigning Duke. And... I want to borrow the Teapot of Eternity for a week."

"A week," Selva said, quirking an eyebrow.

"Lucy and Rachel, my lovers and the true drive behind this quest, are also on a second quest," Kara said. "The Duke has ordered that they may not ever return to Nukem Manor, the center of the land's government, without the Teapot of Eternity in their hands, on pain of death. I need them with me when we face the Duke. I can only legally bring them with me if they have the Teapot. And I do need to maintain at least the appearance of legality, for this to have the best chance of working. As soon as the Duke is deposed, and we have secured our place, we will no longer need the Teapot, and will return it to you immediately, likely after only a day."

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

"...Very well, then," Selva said, nodding. "A week of borrowing the Teapot of Eternity, in exchange for our safety and prosperity within your lands. But..."

"But?" Kara asked.

"This is a very big exchange, that will impact all of us quite greatly," Selva said. "As the Queen, I cannot make that decision alone; it will need to be discussed with the people, suggestions must be made and heard, and then a vote must be taken. During which time, we ask that you stay here in the Dark Gardens as honored guests, and enjoy our hospitality."

"How long do you expect this to take?" I asked.

"About two weeks or so. A month at most."

We shared a look.

"...We may need to teleport back home at some point to let people know we're going to be gone a while," I said.

"I also had something scheduled for next week that I'm going to have to be gone to attend to, so..." Kara added, sheepishly rubbing the back of her neck.

"You're guests, not prisoners," Selva said. "Come and go as you please; we just want you to be here at least some of the time so we can keep you in the loop."

"Okay, cool," Kara said. "We can work with that. Do you have... a particularly large room where we can set up a big bed?"

"Sure thing. Elendar, please show them their room."

----------------------------------------

Carbon's somewhat impromptu addition to the polycule meant another goddamn academic conference on the logistics of putting your arms around a girl and laying down. Since we weren't tired yet, and just killing time with casual cuddling, we'd decided on a fairly amorphous arrangement that let us shift around, take turns, and generally let every combination of all five of us get to know each other, at least physically. Socially, though...

...well, it was a good thing none of us were capable of shutting up.

"Just because I'm good at everything doesn't mean I care about everything," Carbon explained, sitting backwards in Kara's lap while the tall blonde kneaded her fat elf titties like stress balls. "So excuse me if I wasn't paying full attention to some diplomats talking diplomat shit at each other."

"I don't want to be doing this shit any more than you do, apparently," Kara said. "I still pay attention, though, because I have to. I'm gonna be the Duke for as long as it takes to make an heir who wants the position and can take over for me. Which, even if we educate her very well, and start making her right now, would take at least twenty years."

"Well, hey, I'm not using my uterus for anything," Carbon offered.

"We're not fucking yet," Rachel said.

"Aw, man..." Carbon whined, her ears drooping.

"Out of curiosity, Rachel..." I trailed off.

"After we're married," Rachel said.

"Fair enough," I said, nodding.

"Fuckin' religious aristocrats, cramping my style," Carbon muttered, pouting. "I wanna go back to sex, drugs, and rock and roll, dammit! Second base is nice and all, but I wanna get laid."

"Okay, hang on," I said. "Do you know how the translation effect on me works? Because you, and seemingly only you, tend to drop what feel like specific references to the culture I'm from."

"I'm very old," Carbon said with a shrug.

"What, and my world is in this world's past?" I asked. "Or do you just mean you've met some other people summoned from my world, which is... apparently a thing that happens every so often."

"What if I told you that the price of the answer was having sex with me?" Carbon asked.

"I guess I'm not that curious," I said, shrugging.

"C'mon. Just the tip."

I snorted. "Funny, but no. Kisses and cuddles are the most we engage in, here in Rachel's harem."

"Don't you pin this on me," Rachel protested.

"What, you think I'm the one who pulled all these bitches?" I asked.

"Yes," Rachel said.

"You certainly pulled me," Kara added.

"You're very pretty and I want to suck your dick," Volex said.

"I would also like to suck your dick," Carbon said.

"...Okay, fine," I said. "Still!"

"Still," Rachel agreed. "This is a tangle of polyamorous relationships, with each of us being interested in more than just you."

"I like that you keep finding new pairs of fat honkers for me to play with," Kara added. "It's enriched my life so much."

"May I-" I began, reaching out, cutting myself off as Carbon thrust her chest outward, into my outstretched hand. "Oh, those are nice. Wow. Congratulations, Carbon, you've got some absolutely rockin' cans."

"I try," Carbon said, preening under the attention. "What about you, Rachel?"

"I'm gay," Rachel said, sitting in my lap and fondling one of my boobs.

"Ah, fair," Carbon said.

"She's basically only in this for me and Kara," I explained. "And... maybe Volex, provided Volex is willing to get a bit taller and take a dominant role. Maybe."

"We'll see," Rachel said. "I've had no real issue with cuddling her at night, but... I don't know. I just didn't feel the same spark I felt with Kara or Lucy."

"You know..." Volex began.

"I have no interest in a potion that would make me not gay," Rachel said firmly.

"What? No, gross, that's terrible," Volex said. "Why would I make something like that? No, I was going to say, Carbon pointed out how we've got every possible permutation on 'secondary affinity for void' in our polycule, except then she revealed there's a sixth element, nature. So, if we want to complete the collection, we need to get someone with primary nature and secondary void in here. You know. A dark elf."

"...Volex, you beautiful genius, I could kiss you," I said.

Volex leaned forward, her eyes closed and lips pursed, so sure, I guess I would kiss her. My girlfriend. Who is very sexy and has great big knockers. You know, if she was going to insist. Her mouth was very warm, in a pleasant way, and tasted faintly of herbs and spices, as though the alchemy had suffused her entire being.

"Do I get a kiss?" Carbon asked, once I pulled back from what had been rather a longer kiss than I'd originally intended.

"...Rachel, do you mind- thank you." Rachel wordlessly climbed out of my lap, and switched places with Carbon so she could make out with Kara. "Alright, elftits, bring it in."

Carbon was amazingly skilled with her tongue, and was probably cheating with either direct nerve stimulation or secreted aphrodisiacs in her saliva, or possibly both, but I couldn't deny that she kissed like a champion even without any of that. She was also, quite predictably, very soft, and felt amazing when I pressed her against me in a tight, squeezing hug.

"Alright," I said, pulling back from the kiss. "Tonight, we keep figuring out how to integrate Carbon into our dynamics... and tomorrow, we find a dark elf to date."

"It'll help build a relationship between us and the elves," Kara added, before sticking her tongue back down Rachel's throat.

"See, she gets it," I said, pulling Volex in for a side-on cuddle. "Good thinking, kitten. Where would we be without you?"