Chapter Thirteen: Kind of a package deal. You in?

It was as bright as day. Jinx’s magic fire was good stuff, and Pridehelm was going up nicely; I was glad knowing that miserable place would be gone forever. Within three minutes of the fire erupting from the keep, I received notice of a sizable deposit of gold in my storage.

I set the chest out, allowing everyone in the party to dump the looted goods from the cultists so we could split it up later.

Jinx was livid when Heather insisted on bringing the frost elf along. The rest of the party sided with him, but Heather held her ground. She explained that Leoleth had spent a month detoxing and had experienced an epiphany during her time in the Longhorn’s dungeon.

According to Heather’s account, the frost elf realized she didn’t want to waste her existence trapped in the dragon cult or living on the run as an outlaw. While she wasn’t exactly on a path to sainthood, she seemed determined to avoid a future filled with chains and human sacrifices.

Her first act of redemption? Coldly taking down the last guard on the roof as a display of her newfound resolve and loyalty. Heather was practically radiant with pride, seeing it as a small but meaningful step toward spiritual progress. For the Goddess Amania, at least. It wasn’t exactly a glowing endorsement of virtue, but Heather was determined to claim the victory, no matter how shaky.

As for me, I suspected Leoleth’s motives were a lot simpler. She struck me as a hedonist itching to make up for lost time.

I wanted nothing to do with a verbal altercation between Jinx and the Priestess, so I moved to the privacy of the rickety lean-to to check the small chest I saw earlier. Thank the gods for privacy because the first thing I found was… a smooth, polished stone object clearly designed to… ease the burden of long, lonely nights on watch.

It was a treasure, sure. But not the kind I was in the market for. It even came with accessories: a small crock of greasy-looking stuff (which I could only assume was for lubrication) and a rag with a fading cleaning enchantment. Someone had thought this through, but I could hardly praise their work ethic.

Eric’s popularity suddenly made sense. This group of elves was clearly one awkward touch away from spontaneous combustion. Honestly, we might not have even needed to storm the keep. Pridehelm might have burst into flames all on its own.

I dragged myself back into the thick of it when Jinx and Heather each called me out to join the debate. I left the chest for the next adventurer to come across and reluctantly complied.

Leoleth gave me the ultimate puppy-dog eyes. So, cue Sarah McLachlan's tear-jerking ballad in my head. She and Heather managed to win over Gem, making the deciding vote land squarely on yours truly. The two boys stared expectantly, and I was half convinced that the frost elf and I would end up sharing the lean-to as our new home with nothing but a used dildo to keep us company on the long winter nights if I voted wrong. But girl solidarity won the day.

Heather was practically glowing with accomplishment, and Gem just chuckled, amused by the spectacle.

Leoleth gave me a chilly embrace (literally, being a frost elf and all). And we piled into the carriage. The moon was now high above, painting the world in its teal light. Jinx was more than happy to take the reins, and Kev sat next to him with his massive arms folded, the look of an angry toddler on his face. Neither of them wanted anything to do with the compartment. Eric snuck in like he was stowing away on a ship, seemingly afraid to draw attention to himself.

The journey would take a blessedly uneventful day and a half, which I suspected was just long enough for tempers to settle and new tensions to rise.

It had been a very, very long day. To recap, I started off sneaking out of bed before dawn. Again. We got a quest, and I got slightly molested by a lecherous duchess. We rode clear across the valley, where I ended up killing, like, ten dragon cultists. And lastly, we took down a giant demon spider.

I also kissed a handsome boy so…win!

I was tired. I sat between Heather and Gem in the rear while Eric lay across the middle bench, and Leoleth took ownership of the front one. Everyone was drifting to sleep—everyone but me.

When not asleep, my mind wanders. I was still new here, but I felt like I was a thousand years old after witnessing the extremes of this world. Life is held on by a thread here; there is no question about that. I could feel how close I and my friends were to dying more than once. I also dealt out a fair amount of death myself. Each day was a lifetime when it was so close to being your last one.

The incidents in the village, in the camp, and at the keep weren’t going to disappear just because I was heading to a new place. The carriage carried us further away every mile, but the faces stayed with me like they were all burned into my mind. The slavers. The frost elves. Even the orcs were all living rent-free at the moment. I wanted to scream at myself for what I’d done. It was wrong. It was murder. Regan Summer doesn’t kill people.

That was the lie I told myself.

I sat in that carriage, desperate to feel something. Anything actually would have been nice. I longed for guilt. I wanted Jiminy Cricket on my shoulder, whispering Shame! Just a little reminder that I was still human. Back on Earth, I had the full range of emotions to pick from, but here? Murder World decided remorse wasn’t part of the starter pack. Maybe the gods thought I’d be better off without it.

I leaned against Gem. She reached up, absentmindedly stroking my cheek as the carriage swayed through the night. Did I deserve this? Did I deserve her? A lover who accepted me completely, even after everything I’d done. Gem never flinched or gave me a second look when I cut down a half-dozen men without breaking stride. I was no slouch in the killing department. My body count was just under twenty, a little over with assists.

“I think I love you,” I whispered so softly it felt like a confession to myself as much as to her.

“I think you do, too,” she replied with a smile, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips. She didn’t need to say it back. Gem’s love wasn’t the kind you put into words; it was in every glance, every touch. But she wasn’t human and didn’t love like a human. She was a creature of this world. Like it, she was beautiful, untamed, and brutal. I would always be hers, but she would never truly be mine.

It was what it was. And somehow, I was okay with that because I was coming to the realization that I wasn’t human either.

I took a moment to take stock: what I had, what I’d lost, and where I was headed. I was a Rogue: a thief and a killer who fought dirty. Just thinking that about myself felt ridiculous, like I was narrating someone else's life. And yet, it was true. It's completely absurd but true.

Still, for the first time, I had good money, real friends, and actual prospects. That felt like a win in a world as extreme as this one.

But I’d also lost another life, and it wasn’t just my family and my old home, but the person I used to be. Old Regan had been a quiet loner, content in her solitude but never really happy. She’d reached for so many things back then, only to see them slip through her fingers when things got difficult.

Now? I didn’t have a clear path forward, but ideas were forming. I wanted to see this world—every corner of it if I could. I’d wished to do that back home too, but it had meant working a crappy job so that I could use the travel benefits. Here, exploring felt alive, thrilling, and entirely possible.

And I wanted more for myself. I was stronger now than I’d ever been. Everything I wanted felt within reach as long as I was willing to work for it. On Nya, the idea that anything might be out of my grasp seemed laughable.

I almost drifted off when my mind was finally done with its endless gymnastics, but The Whisperer’s words lingered: It’s kind of a roll of the dice. If you spin up human, you’ll stay human, but magic has its ideas about how you’ll end up. There was comfort in that thought—and a little terror. Magic had its own ideas, and here I was.

Magic in this world was supposedly chaotic, yet it also seemed to keep everything running in an organized way. Still calling bullshit on what she said. I started counting backward in my head from ten. I was done, really done this time. The sounds of the road eased my mind, and I finally passed into my usual dreamless sleep somewhere around three.

My slumber ended a few hours later when Kev wedged himself back into the compartment. His snoring was so thunderous that it seemed to shake the whole vehicle.

Blurry-eyed, I slipped out of the window and climbed onto the bench next to Jinx. We sat quietly for a while, and then I started rehashing all the loopy thoughts in my head in a rambling monologue.

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.

He politely nodded, giving me as much attention as I needed to feel like I was being heard. And then, unexpectedly, he turned to me, a giant smile on his face.

“You know,” He said, his tone unusually thoughtful, “they say it’s all random, us comin’ ‘ere an’ all. But I don’t think it is. Neither of us ‘ad much goin’ for us back there, on Earth. We just spun our wheels an’ got nowhere. But here? We got traction. Real traction. I’m not much for faith, but I see a hand in it. Don’t know ‘ow or what, but there’s somethin’.”

The sun broke behind us, spilling gold and green across the uplands. It was the kind of beauty that filled you up, warming you from the inside despite the chill in the air. For a moment, everything felt… right.

“Thanks,” I said, kissing his cheek softly.

He touched the spot, smiling. “For what, love?”

“For being on the road that day.”

He shrugged like it was nothing. “Family’ll always be there when you need ‘em.”

Coming from a guy who grew up in a broken home, it hit me like a punch to the chest. Heart-wrenching and hopeful all at once.

I climbed down and slipped through the carriage window. Inside, everyone was beginning to stir. Maybe it was the sunlight streaming through the windows. But more likely, it was the sheer force of an orc’s sleep apnea.

There was a quiet sense of resignation over the party as we all looked at each other, hardly able to speak. We were done. We’d faced the trials of this journey and somehow made it out the other side, mostly intact. The most apparent cost was energy. We were all just bone-deep, exhausted. But not just that. It had taken a toll on the soul as well. It was just a few days of concentrated mayhem; even our stops were only for a few hours while we refueled.

By the time we rolled into Mountainside, we had no debate: we were parking the carriage and taking the day off. No orcs, no cultists, no roving bands of kidnappers today. Just pub food, hot baths, and the kind of boredom that sounded downright luxurious.

We found the best and only inn in town and paid for rooms. The innkeeper, blurry-eyed and not a morning person, perked up as soon as seven adventurers walked in with coins to spare. He even set us up with a private dining room with our own keg and a serving wench for the day.

The hierarchy of offensive odors decided the bathhouse lineup. Kev usually claimed the top spot, but Eric managed an upset victory this time, much to everyone's disgust. We took turns scrubbing off the layers of dirt that I am sure exceeded the magical tub’s ability to filter out. Afterward, we enjoyed breakfast with coffee and pastries. The seven of us were coming and going, keeping the poor dwarven wench on her toes. I made a mental note to tip her well.

While sorting through our collection of looted clothes, I found a lovely cotton dress for Leoleth. It was the kind of thing you'd see in any dwarven village—simple and functional. She hated it immediately, complaining that the style and color were entirely wrong for her. The ordeal felt like shopping for school clothes with an irritable twelve-year-old.

For some reason, I was the only one who wasn’t surprised she managed to disappear with the woodcutter less than twenty minutes after her bath. The fact that he was married, or at least had been, was hardly an issue for the frost elf. Scandals in small towns spread faster than wildfire, and Leoleth was the kind of gasoline that could turn them into infernos. I was just grateful we weren’t chased out of town before lunch.

Eric cleaned up nicely, thank the gods. His scruffy ginger beard had been tamed into a more polished, dapper look, and with a fresh set of clothes, he was all I was hoping for. Bounding and swaggering, he was brimming with energy. I was ready to get him out of those fancy clothes and see what all the frost elves had been enjoying.

I was worried about Gem. We hadn’t exactly defined our relationship, and I had no idea how she’d feel about me hooking up with someone else. The fun we’d had with Nemdor felt more like a gift she wanted me to enjoy. It was a shared indulgence since she knew I had never been with a man. But I wasn’t the only one enjoying his talents. She was right in there with us and took more than one turn with him. I still had nothing but admiration for the half-dwarf, especially his stamina. I was convinced he had a secret stash of potions somewhere.

This was different, however. Eric wasn’t just a random fling; he was a friend. He was a new friend, but I found him very attractive, and wanting to be with him felt natural. Even if it was just for a night. After our heart-to-heart in Wood Cut, I didn’t think Gem was the possessive type. She struck me as someone who’d have no problem sharing me. I mean, she was a satyr. But still, I wasn’t entirely sure.

When she returned from the bathhouse, hands on her hips, her expression somewhere between amused and expectant, Eric and I were mid-kiss at the table. I decided to roll the dice. Either she’d be okay with it or not.

I smiled at her, cranking up my cuteness and giving her a mischievous shrug, like a naughty schoolgirl who wanted to get caught. Because, let’s face it, I totally did. It just seemed easier than trying to explain all my stupid feelings and shit.

She slid onto the bench beside me, eyes sparkling. “Can’t say I didn’t see this coming.”

I let go of Eric and turned to Gem, pulling her in for a deep, passionate kiss that left no doubt about how I felt about her.

“Uh…” Eric stammered; his usual swagger was suddenly replaced with uncertainty. It was like the ground had shifted under him, and he wasn’t sure where he stood anymore.

I came up for air, turned back to Eric, and kissed him softly. Then, with a playful grin, I whispered, “Kind of a package deal. You in?”

Spoiler alert: He absolutely was.

We spent a good chunk of the day making love after that. Eric was an absolute champ. All that “training” in less-than-ideal conditions had clearly paid off. Give the guy a soft mattress, a sturdy headboard, and a proper meal in his system, and he was practically a force of nature. Even the satyr had to admit she was impressed.

We all drifted back to the inn around dinnertime, each returning from our little adventures. The innkeeper had pulled out all the stops. A fresh goat had been brought in, and the dining table had been replaced with a spit where it roasted to perfection. From the cellar came the good wine, served alongside plates of roasted vegetables and fresh fruit.

We feasted together like a family. At some point, we invited the innkeeper, his wife and children, and the rest of the staff to join us, sharing the abundance and the sheer joy of being alive. The celebration spilled into the rest of the inn, drawing in anyone wandering by. We raised our glasses to friends, present and long gone, to the baby born yesterday down the street, and even to the passing of the town’s oldest draft horse.

By first light, we were good and thoroughly exhausted. Still, we packed up and bid farewell to Mountainside, rejoining the Imperial Highway with renewed energy and a healthy stash of wealth.

As we rolled out, I glanced westward, my chest tight with longing and excitement. Leaving the road and countryside behind filled me with unexpected anticipation. With all its newness and supposed civilization, the city called to me like a promise. I couldn’t wait to see what it had in store.

Character Sheet: Regan Summer

Half Human, Half Urban Elf Level 3

Height: 4 feet, 8 inches Weight: 85 pounds

Hair: Pink Complexion: Imperial Urban Fair

Origin: Earth

Classes:

Rogue: Level 3

Rogue Jobs:

Assassin: Level 3

Base Attributes:

Strength: 10

Dexterity: 18

Spirit: 7

Charisma: 17

Intelligence: 18

Endurance: 7

Luck: 11

Adrenaline Points: 233/233

Recovery: 5 pts/sec

Essence Points: 188/188

Recovery: 5 pts/sec

Vitality Points: 1106/1106

Recovery: 5 pts/sec outside of combat.

Skills/Spells:

Acrobatics Level 1

Appraisal Level 1

Arcana Level 1

Dagger Level 3

Disarm Traps Level 1

Lock Picking Level 1

Misfire Level 1

Negotiation Level 2

Nudge Level 1

One and Done Level 1

Pick Pocketing Level 1

Powerful Strike Level 1

Short Bow Level 1

Short Sword Level 1

Sleight of Hand Level 1

Sneak Attack Level 3

Stealth Level 2

Racial Skills:

Night Vision

Hide in Shadows

Internal Navigation

Gift of Tongues

----------------------------------------

The End: Rogue Trip