Ray woke up feeling groggy, disoriented as if he had a hangover. His powers slumbered deep inside him. He let them, it was still Day outside.

His eyes fell on the figure of a sleeping woman. His thoughts slowly turned. How did a woman get in here? And why was she sleeping? He pushed her with a foot. He seemed to hear muffled laughter, but as he listened, it was gone. He must’ve imagined it. The woman did not stir, and something felt weird when he pushed her before. He was going to shake her awake, but as he reached out and felt her shoulder, he jumped back in fright. It was rigid. She was dead.

“Pfffft, HAHAHAHAHAHA!” Vorm couldn’t hold back anymore and burst out laughing.

His heart racing, confused, Ray ignored Vorm and franticly tried to remember what had happened. Right, he was digging out this place. Then he got hungry and went out to look for… blood… prey… as if a dam burst, it all came back to him.

The unceasing laughter still ran in his mind. Shut up, it’s not funny!

Vorm took deep breaths, even though it did not breath, and finally said, “Admit it, it was pretty funny.”

No it was not, poor woman.

“If it’s any consolation, she really, really enjoyed the last moments of her life, experi—“

Ray didn’t let it finish, No, no, no, I don’t want to know, stop.

Vorm snickered, but it didn’t continue.

Ray stood there for a while in the dark, looking at the woman. It occurred to him, that it was pitch-black, yet he could still see even if everything seemed duller, less sharp. It seemed even if it was Day outside and his powers slumbered, some of it still remained.

Eventually, he broke the silence, “I’m not as upset as I should be,” was his conclusion. If anything, he felt puzzled. He should feel guilt, crushing regret. He could remember everything clearly. He only felt bad for not feeling any remorse. He tried to work up some kind of feeling of guilt, but he couldn’t.

Sighing, he wanted to immerse himself into that mood and state of mind to turn the corpse into Ashes, but something felt wrong.

“Right, it’s Day outside,” he muttered to himself. He would just wait for the Night. He sat back down to think things through. He had to face it. He just didn’t find anything wrong with what he had done last Night. In fact, it felt liberating.

Frustrated, he scratched at his head roughly. It hurt. He should not feel the way he did.

Stopping, he dropped his hands, feeling dejected and defeated.

Vorm, I’m a monster.

“So what?”

He lied back down next to the corpse, putting his hands under his head, staring up at nothing. He pondered for a while, then answered.

Nothing. I don’t feel bad, and no matter how much I try, I can’t feel bad. Because this is the price this power demands, and I’d rather pay it then give it up. I won’t try to justify it, by saying I need the strength to go against that man, or it’s because I just can’t help it. This life, I’m a monster. After this life is over, I know I’ll regret it, won’t I? But that’s future me’s problem. It’s actually nice feeling calm for once.

There was no point wasting time dwelling on his feelings anymore. Maybe he could work himself into feeling some guilt eventually, but he had to admit, he kind of enjoyed not feeling bad about what he had done. No, what was important now, was to figure out his situation. He hardly understood anything about his body, let alone the city.

Thinking about it, he only knew the most obvious. There was that narcissistic asshole, the so called Patriarch, as a ruler, some priestesses with servants, and the city separated into two parts. Oh right, and some creepy, disgusting underground lakes in a giant cavern for who knows what purpose. Maybe that cavern he saw wasn’t even the only one and he had no idea how deep those lakes were. He didn’t want to know.

Anyway, he desperately needed more information. Because no matter what that man had said, that he could do whatever he wanted, he’d be an idiot to trust him on that. This whole thing smelled, and was too suspicious.

Maybe that man just knew where he was at all times that was why he was allowed to wander around in the city? But they clearly spent a lot of resources creating his body, what for? What did they want from him? He didn’t like not knowing and he could feel his simmering rage coming to life just thinking of that man. How dare—no. Pushing down his anger with difficulty, Ray told himself he needed to stay calm and focused, thinking things through carefully.

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Was he the only one to begin with? Have they created others like him before, and if so, were they also wandering around? He hadn’t felt the presence of his kind, so he didn’t think so. Maybe they were locked up in some dungeon? Or was he really the first one? But Ray couldn’t wrap his head around why they would let him do whatever.

Actually… maybe they just wanted to observe his natural behavior? To know exactly what they had created? Those priestesses had said they didn’t fully understand. Just the thought of being observed and studied frustrated him, feeling like a trapped beast in a cage.

But he was not a mindless beast to be controlled by his urges. He’d stay hidden to give them as little information as possible. He had already taken a woman, that couldn’t be helped, but the city seemed big enough that a missing woman wouldn’t matter. Although, he couldn’t be sure about that because he didn’t understand at all how the city worked.

He shouldn’t have dug his hideout above the inner part so close to the center of power either. He had to move, dig another one above the periphery of the city, and start collecting information from there. He could not assume anything. Just thinking of AZ’s city, his ignorance would have caused his death in a day or two there if he was on his own for sure.

There were so many things to do, Ray was starting to feel overwhelmed as he thought about how he needed to figure out what he was capable of, how his powers worked exactly. But to experiment with them he needed blood first. He did not want the hunger to overtake him.

That was another thing he needed to figure out. Just how much blood and how often he needed it? And how much could he use his powers before the hunger became irresistible? He was so clueless about anything.

Pushing down his anxiety about the mounting tasks, he tried to find solutions instead. He should keep some live humans in his hideout he could feed on safely. Although… he still didn’t know if missing people would be reported. Thinking more about it, he had a feeling they would be. If they really wanted to see how he would behave on his own, and they were clearly aware he needed to feed on blood, they would pay attention of how many people disappeared. Although, he didn’t know crime rates, maybe people disappeared constantly anyway…

But to be safe, it was paramount to feed without killing. Maybe if he wasn’t so hungry he could control himself better and not completely drain his pre—interrupting that thought he corrected himself—his involuntary blood donors.

No matter how he thought about it, even if it was reported, he would have to take someone again tonight. He could interrogate them about the city and keep them alive as emergency rations.

His eyes involuntarily landed on the woman’s corpse. She died fast, didn’t suffer. But keeping people captive to feed on was different. He imagined how those people would feel, being stuck in perpetual darkness, slowly weakening and dying as their blood was taken over and over.

Doubt and hesitance rared their heads. Maybe he shouldn’t take anyone back…

No.

He forcefully tore his eyes away from the corpse. He couldn’t be weak. It seemed he still had some empathy, and even though he felt bad for the people he would keep as…livestock—he had to admit it, livestock—he weirdly also felt better for being capable of feeling bad.

A monster with feelings. He self-deprecatingly started chuckling to himself. But maybe it was just a desperate cry, disguised as laughter. So what if he was a monster? That was what he told himself, but something deep down kept nagging at him. He ignored it as his feeble laughter stopped and he steeled himself. No one else mattered.

Determined, he resolved himself that he would do whatever was necessary to free himself from that man and this cursed city. So, yes, he’d take someone, far from the cliff wall, and then take them up the cliff and dig a new hideout. If using his powers made him hungry, he could feed right away and the hunger wouldn’t get out of control. He could also try to keep them alive and interrogate them after he had a safe place.

What if he accidentally killed them though? Should he ask his questions before he started digging? No… his priority had to be to make a safe place. He would completely close, obstruct the entrance of his current hiding place, so even if someone spotted it they wouldn’t know he was living in the mountain cliff.

He couldn’t imagine anyone else climbing up, but again, he didn’t know the city at all, and it was better to be safe than sorry. He had to figure out a way to close and open his tunnel easily, it was stupid to leave it wide open. He should have thought things through better, but he hadn’t had time to think before, he had just wanted to get away, and then the hunger came.

Thinking of getting away, he needed to test if he really couldn’t leave this city. He didn’t have high hopes, but maybe he could if he tried hard enough. He shouldn’t take anything at face value. He’d head to the outer city wall while looking for a spot on the cliff to dig a new hideout. After he found a good spot, he wouldn’t dig yet, but try to leave the city first. Maybe he could, then there would be no point of having a hideout above the city. He would get as far away as possible, worst case just digging a hole in the ground before dawn. If he couldn’t leave, he’d head away from the cliff and take someone. Then go back to the place he decided on before, and make his new hideout.

Right, that’s what he would do then.

Ray felt a bit better after organizing his thoughts somewhat and making a plan for the Night. Now, he just needed to wait for the Sun to set.

Actually, he could think of how to make a naturally looking stone door for his tunnels, but there wasn’t much to think about that. He’d just use a big stone he’d pull out from the beginning of the tunnel, creating a recess. So whenever he had to leave or come in, he could just move the stone into the recess, move past it, and put the stone back. Troublesome, but safer. And he was plenty strong enough to move around a stupid stone anyway.

Ray kept going over and over his plans as he waited for the Night to set. He could feel it approaching, his powers slowly awakening. It wouldn’t be long now.

He sat up and looked at the woman’s corpse. As time passed, the woman’s corpse stopped being just an object and became what it was… someone’s corpse. A woman’s, presumably a mother’s. Her children would miss her. He had been trying to ignore it, but growing guilt and regret were gnawing at him. He let them be, he was the one who wanted to work up some kind of remorse earlier and couldn’t. Now, he got what he wanted.

He would have more victims, tear apart more families…

But his resolve did not waver and at last Night set.