PART 1

"O-Ow! Hey! Careful!"

Hissing, I glanced over my shoulder at the girl straddled on the back of my thighs, and she let out a dismissive huff.

"Oh, don't be a baby," Angie chided me and continued to knead the small of my back with extra vigour.

"Your Grace, please pay attention to these areas," Jaakobah noted in a disinterested voice, pointing at my lumbars.

"Thank you, I'm on it!"

With that, the Celestial girl on my back let out a determined grunt and started humming a catchy tune while lightly poking me all over the place, like some sort of post-apocalyptic martial artist.

I tried my best to ignore the stinging sensation and relaxed as much as I could. We were inside the nurse's office after classes were already over. Angie, hyper as ever, was in her PE outfit, with the white shirt and the short shorts and everything. So was I, since PE was the last class of the week. As for the phlegmatic Celestial agent, he was still fully dedicated to his cover identity as the new school nurse, though he also had a familiar magical monocle clenched over his right eye in addition to the usual white coat and stray stethoscope.

As of this very moment, I was serving as Angie's training dummy while she practised her healing hymns under the watchful guidance of Jaakobah. It would've been a pretty nice and wholesome scene, if not for two issues. First off…

"La-laaa!"

"Ow! Hey, no punching!" I hissed again.

"I can't help it!" Angie fumed on my back, interrupting her aria. "You have very high magic resistance, and without a catalyst, this is the best way to inject mana directly into your astral body and help you with your internal injury. Right, Mr. Arpachshad?"

"Precisely, Your Grace," Jaakobah responded in his usual, unenthusiastic voice. Angie giggled and continued to roughly knead my muscles.

That was already vexing, but then there was the second issue. Namely, that we weren't alone in the room.

"I don't know how to feel about this," Josh muttered, his arms crossed and his mouth set in a thin line of slight disapproval. He tried to remain mature and calm about it, yet it was plain to see that his girlfriend straddling me and giving me an enthusiastic, magic-infused massage didn't sit well with him.

"Agreed," Judy, sitting on the other bed of the infirmary, noted with similar levels of dissatisfaction. "I'm currently hovering around a six. What about you?"

"I don't know," Elly noted absently, one finger on her chin. "I don't think it's that bad, but… I think I'm also around a three."

"That's low," my dear assistant noted without looking away from me, her eyes boring holes into my forehead.

The three of them were also still in their PE attires, and while the girls were sitting on the bed, Josh opted to remain standing and lean against the wall near the entrance instead. Anyhow, Judy's relentless stare was bothering me the most, so I turned my head to face her directly.

"Is there something you want to tell me, Dormouse?"

"Just what I've already told you," she answered in a level, dispassionate voice. "You're not allowed to enjoy this, or we'll hate you for at least three days."

"Wait, me too?" the princess blurted out in alarm, but I was too busy squinting at my non-draconic girlfriend to pay her much heed.

"Do I look like I'm enjoying myself right n—? Ow! Angie! Cut it out with the elbow!"

"I'm experimenting!" I couldn't see her face at the moment, but her response sounded like she had an impish grin on her face. "Come on, Leo! It's not my fault you have such a good physique! I have to work hard to push through all those tough muscles!"

"I'm slowly starting to figure out how I feel about this, and it's not good," Josh noted with a frown and Judy nodded along.

"I'm getting closer to a seven."

"Still three!" the princess followed it up as if by reflex, but before I could get a word in, the door of the infirmary was thrown open so hard that it nearly whacked the guy by the entrance in the nose.

"Hey! Watch it!"

The newcomer didn't care about his objections and instead she exclaimed, "Brother! I've heard you were injured! Are you all ri—!?" Penny, looking a bit dishevelled at the moment, rushed into the nurse's office, only to freeze on the spot when she noticed me on the bed with Angie on top. "A-A-Awawa! B-Brother! That's inappropriate!"

"What happened?" Snowy poked her head through the entrance a beat later, and after seeing the scene with my other (and considerably more mortified) sister in the middle, she walked in and closed the door behind herself before turning to Angie and Jaakobah. "Is he all right?"

"He'll be fine!" Angie declared with gusto and cracked her knuckles. "I'll whip him back into shape in no time!"

"O-Oh… So you're just healing him?" Penny let out a relieved sigh. "Thank god. But we can't let Judy and Eleanor see this!"

"We're here, actually."

"Kyaaah!"

Ignoring the skit on the side (or how she could miss my girlfriends), Snowy looked me over with clear concern reflecting in her eyes. Seeing that we were getting nowhere fast, Josh walked over to explain the situation.

"As far as I've heard, Leo was showing off yesterday and strained his back."

"It's a little bit worse than that," I pointed out, but he ignored my comment and continued with the same breath.

"We played basketball during PE, and as tradition, we had a bit of a contest." He crossed his arms again and sent me a stoic look. "And because he was losing, your brother overexerted himself and got a cramp."

"Again, this is a bit more complicated than just a cramp, and my team wasn't losing. It was only a two-point difference, and there were still five minutes left of the match," I grumbled, which put a smile on Snowy's face, for some reason. Maybe because she was relieved that I was well enough to complain like that? Little sisters were complicated.

Anyhow, as I had already alluded to, my current predicament wasn't as simple as pulling a tendon. The day before, I picked up Naoren (together with his heavy wooden chair) twice, just for shits and giggles, but what I failed to consider was that I was only wearing the school uniform version of my Leoformer. That one had the least robust physical enhancement suite out of all my enchanted outfits, and I also didn't have Cal or Teeny at the ready to fuel it with extra mana.

Because of that, while I did manage to lift Naoren and his seat over my head twice, I didn't notice that I had to run the enchantments past the redline, and because most of the effort was coming from my lower back, I ended up receiving minor mana burns there. Worse yet, because of the same physical enhancements, I wasn't feeling it until I turned off my Leoformer in the evening, at which point all the strain and pressure hit me at once with a vengeance.

Then… well, I didn't like to admit it, but maybe I really did over-exert myself during PE. Just a little bit. I couldn't exactly help it; Josh was cheating with his stupid Celestial specs, so I had to give my A-game to keep up. If anything, it was his fault.

Thus concluded, I was about to chew out my friend, but then I tensed up when Angie lightly patted down my back, without any healing magic infused.

"You know, I always knew you were muscly, but I didn't know you were this muscly!"

"We're getting dangerously close to an eight," Judy noted in a low, almost threatening voice.

"Eight of what?" came the confounded inquiry from Penny, and Elly was champing at the bit to explain.

"We're calibrating our jealousy-meter."

"Your what?"

"It's part of our efforts to rework and improve our anti-harem countermeasures," Judy noted absently and then poked Elly in the side with her elbow.

"Hm? Oh, right! It's… um… A five?" When my dear assistant narrowed her eyes, the princess hastily added, "I-I mean, Leo always had a really attractive physique, and it only got better ever since he came back from Elysium, so Angie is just telling the truth. There's nothing wrong with that… I think."

In the meanwhile, my knightly sister kept blinking at them with invisible question marks circling around her head like a flock of hungry birds.

"I don't get it."

I was just about to tell her she shouldn't worry about that, but then Angie slapped the small of my back and snapped her finger.

"I know, right? Even Grandpa Deus is saying Polemos wouldn't be Polemos without the muscles!" She paused for a second, probably listening to the disembodied voice of the Celestial founder in her head, and then she added, "He also says that Polemos used to be even manlier in the past."

"Manlier?" I echoed her, moving my torso a bit so I could once again glance at her over my shoulder, and she nodded with a childish grin plastered on her face.

"Yes! With even bigger muscles and one of those lantern jaws! Like that actor, from that movie! You know which one I'm talking about, right?" When I didn't respond, she glanced over at her boyfriend. "Josh, support! You know who I'm talking about, right?"

"… You have to be a bit more specific than 'that actor in that movie'."

"Boo! You're supposed to use your boyfriend magic to figure out what a girl thinks!"

"There's no such thing," he denied reflexively, only to pause and send me an uncertain glance. "… Right?"

"Nope," I confirmed, much to his relief. "Trust me, if something like that was an actual, metaphysical thing, I wouldn't have had half as many problems in my relationship."

"Why are you saying that?" Elly chimed in, cheeks puffed and mouth set in a pout. "We have a great relationship, right, Judy?"

"I won't comment on that, but I do admit that we're a statistical anomaly."

"How very politician of you," I quipped, turning around to face Judy again. "Have you thought about running for the position of student council president?"

"I haven't, but maybe I will now."

Judy's response was deadpan as ever, to the point even I wasn't sure if she was joking or not.

"Hihi. You guys are so cute," the Celestial girl on my back exclaimed with a giggle. "You know what Grandpa Deus just said? He says that it's okay not to be as manly as before, because this time you at least aren't single!"

"This time?" Snowy interjected, head cocked to the side, but then her eyes lit up with realization. "Oh. You mean Polemos?"

"Of course I mean Polemos. We're talking about him, aren't we?" Angie huffed, and then repeatedly poked my back. "Can you believe that this guy used to be super-popular back in the day, but he never got married? All the most beautiful women of the era were practically throwing themselves at him, but he didn't even give them a second glance!" After a pause, she stifled a chuckle. "Grandpa Deus says it's good that you're no longer a workaholic and have lovers, but he warns you that you shouldn't go from one extreme to the other and become a womanizer in this life."

"She's… I mean, he's right, Brother!" Penny rejoined the conversation with gusto. "You must set a good example to everyone! You shouldn't get involved in e-easy to misunderstand acts with other girls!"

"What are you talking about?" Angie blurted out, clearly picking up on the message between the lines.

"E-Even if it's for healing, doing something indecent like this in the open is… inappropriate!"

"But we're not doing anything like that!" Angie protested, but then she suddenly put her hands on my buttocks. "See? This would be indecent."

"Ten! That's a ten!" Judy exclaimed with as much emotion as I've ever heard from her in public.

"Seven!" the princess followed her up, and when she got glared at for her trouble, she hastily amended," I-It's supposed to be a joke, so it's not that bad, and…"

"Oookay, that's about enough," Josh grumbled, and grabbed her girlfriend by the waist, lifting her off my thighs.

"Eeep!" Angie yelped in surprise, but then the moment her feet touched the ground, she immediately glomped the guy in a bear hug. "Hehe. A jealous Josh is good too."

Oh. So this whole thing wasn't about me, but teasing her boyfriend? Still, that last bit was a bit too risqué. If the sexes were reversed, we could've said goodbye to our PG-13 rating.

…

Wait, did the Simulacrum have a rating? Who was watching? How old were the Submerged Ones anyway? Or… if they were watching our regular naked wrestling matches with the girls, then we might already have an M rating, wouldn't we?

Putting those silly considerations aside, I raised my upper body off the bed and directed a critical stare at the childhood friend couple. Angie was busy nuzzling up to her boyfriend and teasing him, but Josh's eyes quickly met mine, and he let his shoulders droop in a kind of 'Sorry pal, she can be weird like that sometimes' sort of gesture.

"Please don't make a ruckus in the infirmary," Jaakobah warned the group, and soon everyone settled down a little. "I'll finish the Lord Archon's treatment, and then we can—"

"Ue-sama! Are you in there?"

Before he could finish, the door opened wide, startling everyone. However, none were as startled as I was when I noticed the group on the other side of the door.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Arpachshad," the boy in the front, with his unmistakable bowl-cut hairstyle, greeted Jaakobah with a disinterred voice.

"We're here to deliver these two lost children," the second member of the creepy quartet, Mr. Buzzcut, noted and gestured at Ichiko and Odango-girl in the doorway.

"With our duties fulfilled, we shall leave now, before this scene could erode our reason," Mr Spiky spoke solemnly, and the last amigo, Mr Bedhair, crossed his arms with a "Hmpf!" that he must've thought was really cool, because he looked quite proud of himself.

With that, the four creeps ushered in the kids and disappeared the same way they came, leaving a slightly weird atmosphere in their wake. In the meantime, I sat up and squinted at the two of them.

"What are you doing here?" Penny asked, and I just noticed that she was hiding behind Snowy. I thought she would get along with Ichiko by now, but if anything, her reactions to the mini-miko were getting worse with time.

"More importantly, did those four do anything to you?" I asked out of concern, but the girls looked at me like I was weird.

"No, of course not," Xiao responded first. "The gentlemen were very helpful."

"That's right! We visited Ue-sama's classroom, and Ue-sama wasn't there, but then when we didn't know where to go, they offered their help."

"They were very nice. Just a little weird," Xiao noted with a small frown. "They said some incomprehensible things."

"I'm sure we're just not knowledgeable enough about how high school students talk," Ichiko insisted.

"But they said we aren't in their strike zone yet! Why would they want to strike us?"

"Stop, stop!" I interrupted their little skit before it could get any more cringeworthy and levelled a pair of critical eyes on them. "Putting those guys aside for the moment, why are you here, and why are dressed like that?"

They were sporting matching blue dresses, with palm-sized name-tags pinned on their chests, bright red plastic school backpacks, and equally vivid yellow caps with rims, which almost looked like one of those safety hard hats people would wear at construction sites. I vaguely recognized it as the stereotypical Japanese elementary schooler uniform, but I couldn't figure out why they were wearing it.

"We disguised ourselves to infiltrate Brother Leonard's school!" Odango-girl declared proudly and picked up the hems of her skirt.

"Hm!" Ichiko went as far as to twirl around in place to show off her outfit, and she came to a stumbling halt before striking a pose with one hand on her hip and the other showing a victory sign.

"But why?" Penny asked on the side, and the little girls turned to her, and then back to me.

"Ah, right! We were supposed to meet with Ue-sama in private!" the foxy miko exclaimed in faux despair, and the other girl played along by desperately tugging on her hand.

"What do we do now, Ichi? Is the plan ruined?"

"No-Not yet! Ue-sama is one of us, so he should understand, and we're in the endgame, so it doesn't matter if others also hear about it. No, this might be even better!"

"One of you?" Josh asked with a critical brow raised high, and the two nodded in unison.

"Yes! Brother Leonard is also trying to help Brother Naoren and Sister Rinne, right?"

"Right?" Ichiko doubled down, turning a pair of puppy-eyes at me. "That's why you told him to introduce her in public during Sunday's banquet, right?"

"I'm not following. Am I the only one who's not following?" Penny blurted out, and for once, Josh backed her up with a grunt.

"You're not. Welcome to the club."

"So you came here to… do what exactly?" I rolled the conversation along, and the girls' eyes lit up.

"To have a tactical meeting, and coordinate our efforts!"

"Because Ue-sama is now one of us!"

"One of us! One of us!" Odango-girl chanted with a grin, her fingers balled into fists and moving up and down.

"One of us, one of us," came another chant from the side, and when I glanced at her, Judy immediately stopped and pretended it wasn't her.

"So? What are Ue-sama's plans for the banquet?"

Before I could respond though, someone else raised her voice.

"What banquet? There's going to be a banquet on Sunday?"

Hearing Angie's question, Penny responded with an off-handed, "There are always banquets on the weekends."

"How come this is the first time I've heard about this?" the Celestial girl frowned, making her boyfriend look just a bit pensive.

"What? Do you want to attend, or something?"

"Why not? Leo's going, right?"

"Well, yes, but…"

"You see?" Angie cut me short with a triumphant huff. "Grandpa Deus has been complaining about how I shouldn't just study all the time, but show myself to the public every once in a while, anyway. Let's do it! It should be fun!"

"… Fun? You do realize that the last time you attended a Draconian party, I got into a scuffle with Zihao and we broke a balcony, right?"

"Ah, right. I was meaning to ask you not to do that this time around."

That comment made Josh's eyes open wide in alarm.

"Wait, I'm attending too?"

"Of course, silly squirrel! You're my Joshticar, remember? How could I show up in public without my Joshticar?"

"Are you going too?" Snowy asked my girlfriends, and they nodded in unison.

"It's an important experiment, at least according to the Chief."

"Event," Elly corrected her. "Calling it an 'experiment' makes us sound weird."

"Do you want to go too?" Penny asked my other sister in turn, but didn't even wait for her response before declaring, "I-If you do, I'll come with you! That way, we can get rid of the annoying flies more easily!"

"I don't know, but…"

I couldn't hear the end of Snowy's response, because I was suddenly besieged by two little girls from two sides as they jumped up to the infirmary bed and sandwiched me between them.

"So, what's the plan, Ue-sama?"

"Tell us! What's Brother Leonard's plan?"

As if afraid that I would run away, they each grabbed hold of one of my forearms, eyes sparkling with expectations, and I couldn't help but sigh. Yep. I should've known things would get more complicated; I just didn't expect that they would start spiralling out of control this soon. Still, it was better to deal with some over-the-top romance novel scenario than a life-or-death one, I supposed, and hey? Maybe this way I could finally figure out what the two kids grabbing onto me have been cooking all this time, and…

"Three. Getting closer to four."

Blinking, I turned to my girlfriend and directed one of the flattest stares I'd ever stared in my entire life at her.

"Not funny, Dormouse. Not funny."

PART 2

Saturday mornings were usually chill. They also used to be chilly, because of the season, but due to the recent warm spell, we had some really nice strolling weather, and I was trying to make the most of it.

"I'm still not convinced that this is a wise course of action."

I turned to Roland, walking next to me on the sidewalk of the neighbourhood and, after some consideration, lightly shrugged.

"It's better than letting him rot, and I did promise him that I would work him to the bone. He can't do that while cooped up in custody."

My comment elicited an indignant huff, but not from the man walking beside me.

"Didn't I teach you that it's rude to refer to someone in the third person when they are present?" Percival, no longer 'sir' in any shape or form, griped without looking at me.

"Shut up, old man, or I'll show you what it means to be rude," I responded curtly and turned back to Roland. "As I said, I'm going to squeeze some use out of him, and this is the best way to do it."

"And I'm telling you I'm not convinced that's the case," he retorted.

"Let's just give it a go, okay?" I proposed, and after a brief sharing contest, he finally relented and he started pushing Percival's wheelchair again.

It was one of Mom-in-law's spares, and since she no longer needed to use them, she didn't mind lending one to me. More importantly, I've put a lot of thought into how to deal with Percival, and after consulting with the girls, this was the best I could come up with. Because of his injuries, physical work was out of the question, and I wouldn't let him touch the paperwork of the Ordo Draconis with a standardized ten-foot pole, so I had to get a bit more creative when it came to putting him to good use.

Meanwhile, Percival clicked his tongue and muttered, "Men really have to go to great lengths for the sake of survival."

"Says mister 'I'm going to sacrifice myself to teach you a lesson rather than just surrender' over here," I countered, and he responded with a tired 'Bah!'.

He might've argued with me, but we were getting close to home, so he rolled his shoulders and adopted his kindly grandpa façade.

"Oh, Leonard. It's not good to be so cynical at your age. Why, back in my day…"

I lightly kicked his wheelchair, and he shut up with a mirthless chuckle. We soon reached our doorstep, and I didn't even bother to check if it was locked.

"We're back!" I announced, and the moment I did, Penny excitedly rushed into the vestibule.

"Brother, did you really bring…?" She faltered for a moment, and then exclaimed, "Uncle Percy!"

"Hi, beansprout," he greeted my sister with a lazy wave, and she looked more shocked than anything.

"Oh, wow! I can barely recognize you without your beard!"

He wasn't the only one. His face was cleanly shaved, and combined with the wheelchair and his legs being covered with a thick plaid blanket, he gave off a much more fragile vibe than he did in the past. In fact, I was sure he was playing it up for sympathy points.

"Do I still look handsome?" He asked with a smile, and I had to say, he kind of did, in a 'silver fox' kind of way. Though again; important secondary character, so having good looks was a given. Elderly or not.

Penny ignored his question and looked at me a touch uncertainly. Seeing that, Percival let out a soft yet audibly calculated cough.

"Ah, I see. You must feel uncomfortable with me right now," he stated in a low voice. "I understand. They said I've done some bad things recently, even if I can't remember any of them. I get it, I get it."

He followed that up with more strained coughs, cementing my impression that he really was hamming it up for the sake of pity.

"Did you really lose your memories?" Penny asked, still a bit guarded, but I was getting impatient, so I grabbed the handles of his wheelchair and pushed him inside.

"That's what he says," I spoke offhandedly and wheeled him inside, where Snowy and Tajana were eyeing us from the couch.

"Good… morning?" the listless spymaster greeted us, only to freeze and hide behind the backrest. "M-My Lady! Nobody told me he would be here too!"

Roland must've overheard her whisper, because he turned to face her, at which point she ducked even lower. I wasn't quite sure what the relationship between these two was, but it looked pretty complicated.

"Stop doing that, Tajana. You're embarrassing your mistress," Sir Griffon stated in a deadpan voice, which made her resurface from behind the couch again.

"W-Whose fault do you think that is?!"

"Certainly not mine," Roland, blasé as ever, gave her an implied shrug and continued to monitor Percival.

He was listening to Penny, who was in the process of explaining to him all of his misdeeds, and he somehow managed to look genuinely mortified by the reveal.

"And you sent Brother to the Celestials!"

"Did I? I'm sure I must've had a good reason to do that."

"I-I don't know, but… you also fought Sir Arnwald and Dame Morgana! Agrawain, too!"

"Really? All three of them at the same time? Sounds far-fetched to me."

"But it happened! Brother was there too, and… and you also tried to use your Mantle on Snowy!"

That last one overcame her fidgety awkwardness and made her direct a real, vicious glare at the old man, but he took it in stride.

"What? Rubbish! There's no way I would do something like that! That's just preposterous!"

I had to give it to him, he sounded so genuinely offended by the accusations that, if I lacked context, I might've been tempted to give him the benefit of the doubt. Since I knew the context, however, I was tempted to give him a smack upside his head instead. I refrained, using so much self-control, even the Buddha would've been proud of me.

"B-But everyone saw it! Mom said you even threatened Brother and—!"

"Mom?" he interrupted her, and my sister immediately flushed red.

"A-A-Awawa! I-I'm talking about Dame Morgana! It's for reasons!"

Percival smiled with just a hint of smugness, seeing that he managed to successfully shift the conversation. Ignoring them I turned my attention to Snowy, who was eyeing the old man with apprehension. Before I would get to her, I needed a semblance of privacy, so I subtly gestured to Roland. He got my message and addressed the peculiar woman on the couch in with just a hint of trepidation.

"Tajana? Can you show me where I can find the hot chocolate in the kitchen?"

She sprung up, and I swear to god, one of the pink locks of her hair on the top of her head shook and settled into the upper half of a question mark. Was this the legendary 'ahoge hair' I've read about?

"You want to drink hot chocolate? You?"

"I'm in the mood for it."

She hesitated for a moment, but then she rose from the couch and declared… no, that's a bit strong of a word for this. Stated? No, let's go with 'mumbled'.

"W-What a coincidence… I-I-I also w-wanted to have some h-h-hot c-chocolate!"

With those rather stuttery words, she headed into the kitchen, but before he could follow, I sent Roland a look that said 'Remember what I told you the other day?'. He responded with a roll of his eyes saying 'Of course, stop worrying about dumb things like that', to which I replied with a frown holding the meaning 'It's not dumb. I tell you it's a thing'. He concluded our non-verbal conversation with a sigh that told me, 'Please, Leonard. I'm an adult. I can take care of myself', and then left after Tajana.

Oh well. I tried. Just the other day, I sat Roland down and explained to him how Abyssal Seducers had trouble processing any signs of affection that wasn't created by their powers, real or imagined, and that he should be careful about how he interacted with the hapless spymaster, lest he would raise some flags he wasn't meaning to. As such, I officially washed my hands of this whole affair; if he would end up in some kind of silly romcom development because of his carelessness, he couldn't blame anyone else but himself.

Anyhow, since they left, and Penny was currently completely wrapped up in a conversation that somehow wandered all the way over to discussing the old bastard's mobile gaming accounts, and how she should take them over until he'd get a new phone, I turned to Snowy. It was time to address the elephant in the room.

"Is he going to live with us again?" she asked, pointing at said pachyderm without missing a beat, and I shook my head.

"No, of course not. I don't think he's dangerous anymore, but because of his injuries, he requires nursing care, and I'm not planning to hire a live-in one just for his sake."

"Then… why did you bring him here?"

It was obvious that she was still holding more than a token grudge against the old weasel. Considering he tried to magically poison her, she had all the right in the world to do so.

Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

"Mostly so you could talk. Also, Penny."

Her eyes glided over to my other sister, and despite her earlier sour disposition, she was no noticeably brighter. Seeing that, Snowy exhaled a solemn breath and turned back to me.

"I… don't mind talking to him, if it makes Penny feel better, but… Why?"

That was the crucial question, but before answering, I reached out and held her hand.

"Listen, sis. Let us be perfectly honest here: You're not cut out for politics. Especially not the kind of cutthroat politics they have in the Abyss."

"Um… And that's… bad?"

"More like dangerous." I squeezed her hand, and added, "Maybe it's not going to be today or tomorrow, but the day may come when you'd have to return to the Abyss to reclaim your House. Heck, even if you decide that you don't want to have anything to do with the people of the Abyss in the future, you're still the little sis of the man with the most over-the-top titles in the World of Mystics. I doubt you can fully escape politics, even if you stay on Critias." I looked her in the eye. "The world is full of snakes who would like nothing more than to try to take advantage of you. You'll need the experience to learn how to deal with them, so I brought him here." I jerked my head toward Percival. "I might have defanged him, but that bastard is the biggest, snakiest snake who ever snaked in the history of snaking. I want you to use him, learn from him, and wring him dry so, that when you have to face the real deal in the wild, you'll know how to do the same to them."

Her gaze told me that she understood what I was getting at, but she was still uncertain.

"What… am I supposed to learn from him?"

"Anything you can. Lying, manipulation, espionage tactics, the whole nine yards."

"In that case… would it be okay if Tajana joined?"

I wasn't expecting that question, and it threw me on a loop for a moment.

"It… might not be a bad idea? I mean, if you ever wanted to reclaim House Inanna, I presume she would remain your spymaster, and golly, she definitely needs the experience, but… Can she be trusted?"

"Of course," she proclaimed, flashing a rare, proud grin. "She's already with us. Or, almost. She didn't officially say it yet, but… um… s-she's been badmouthing Noir a lot lately when we talk, so I think she's close."

I thought about it and ultimately nodded along.

"It's fine, then. I promised that I would leave her to you, so go ahead and do what you think works best."

"Thank you, I will."

Seeing her so enthusiastic, my head-patting instincts were just about to kick in, but Roland and Tajana chose this moment to return with a tray full of mugs.

"Hot chocolate?" he asked, and Snowy immediately got up to grab one. As for me, I politely declined and rose to my feet as well.

"Thanks, but not right now. I have places to be."

Glancing at Roland, we shared a knowing look. We already agreed that he would stay until the afternoon and keep an eye on Percival, just in case. As for me…

"Places? What places?" Penny asked from the old man's side, but I waved at her to stay put before she would come over. "I thought we were going to go to the park today."

"I have some Celestial business to quickly take care of. I should be done in an hour or so, and then we can head out after lunch."

"Oh, okay then," she nodded with a hint of relief and her attention returned to the old bastard, whose eyes were glued to my every move. I purposefully ignored him and headed towards the teleport closet, but then I got a sudden idea and turned around.

"Tajana?"

"Y-Yes?" The Abyssal woman yelped in surprise and automatically hid herself behind Roland, only to yelp again and scamper over to Snowy's side instead. And she was supposed to be a seasoned spymaster my sister wanted to recruit, huh? Putting my repeated disappointments in her aside, I locked gazes with her, and she stuttered a somewhat respectful, "H-How can I help you?"

"You've been behaving yourself lately, haven't you?"

"Yes, she has," Snowy responded at once in her stead, looking mildly confused about why I would bring that up at this moment.

"Since that's the case… Would you like to visit your Fauns in the afternoon?"

"I… I can?"

"Sure," I told her with a reassuring smile. "If it's just a quick visit, I can squeeze that into my timetable, and good behaviour has to be rewarded."

She didn't respond right away but glanced at Snowy for support, and when my sister nodded in encouragement, she squeezed out, "Then… please?"

"It's a done deal then." I flashed a smile, and then looked around the living room. "Anyhow, I'll be back in a bit. Everyone, play nice."

"Brother! We aren't kids anymore!" Penny pouted on the side, drawing a chuckle out of me. I wasn't lying when I said I had places to be, so I waved my goodbyes and hopped into the teleport closet. Everyone else was already used to it, so only Percival was giving me a weird look, which made me wonder: was it because he genuinely found the way I left the conversation odd, or was he just sticking to his amnesiac cover story and pretending he didn't know about the teleport circle inside?

Whatever the answer might've been, I didn't give it much thought, because I soon reappeared in Mike's empty, silent kitchen. It didn't stay that way for long though.

"Ack! L-Leonard! What… How are you…?"

Michael stammered in confusion when he walked in and found me standing in the corner.

"Waiting for you to let me in through the balcony door was getting tiresome, so I let myself it."

"B-But… But when? And…"

"Is Admin here already?" a different voice called out from the living room, and I could hear Moose's footsteps. "Oh, there you are," he said when our eyes met. For once, he had his hair and beard groomed, and his outfit was, if not exactly fancy, at least relatively formal. "Come, please. The meeting is about to begin."

"But… what…" the blonde Celestial looked at me, then at the balcony door in the living room, then back at the kitchen, and yelled, "I have so many questions!"

"Pipe down."

"Yessir."

With that concluded, I followed Moose to the corner of the living room. It was now dominated by an L-shaped table with cheap plastic step-stools on top, arranged to form something resembling a semi-circle, like an extremely low-budget miniature model of an ancient Greek amphitheatre. On top of those steps were neatly arranged wooden boxes, their lids open, with softly glowing crystal balls set on velvet cushions inside.

The Celestial communicators were alight with magical activity, and all of them had familiar faces floating over them in all their low-res, old-school sci-fi hologram glory, with scanlines and everything. I glanced at Moose, and he pointedly tugged at the collar of his suit, so I belatedly turned on my Leoformer and donned my Polemos outfit.

"Are we ready to get started?"

"It's a bit early," he answered with an implied shrug. "But everyone's already here, so let's not waste time."

"Took the words right out of my mouth."

Mike was tinkering with some of the crystal balls in the back, softly humming and poking them with his fingers. Was he tuning the reception, I wondered. The images did look a bit sharper over the communicators he touched, but the difference was so small it was hard to be sure.

When he noticed my gaze, he hastily moved away and stood next to the slightly larger crystal ball sitting on the shorter side of the L-shaped table.

"I'm turning on the sound first," he warned us, and a moment later, there was a popping noise, followed by…

"… telling you that Polemos wouldn't be interested in something like that!" the familiar (if currently a little echoing) voice of Eris declared indignantly, followed by a somehow even more heated female voice.

"With all due respect, Matriarch. I know you may feel a sense of familiarity with the Second True Archon, Lord Polemos, hallowed be his name, but I would advise you not to address him so… so frivolously!"

"How dare you? I'm not being frivolous!" The ex-chief-director was fuming, and it showed on her low-res representation as well. "Who do you think you are to lecture me?"

"I'm the one His Grace, the Second True Archon, has chosen to be his voice within Elysium! I have the right to warn you about unbecoming behavior, Matriarch!"

The owner of the second voice, the dark-haired middle-aged Celestial whose communicator was placed right in the middle, let out a huff.

That was Adva Tira. And yes, I have picked her to be our Speaker, working with Moose and Mike to communicate between me and the members of the newly formed Elysian Congregation (name still pending). And also yes, I have picked her because she was the only mid-level Director whose name I could recall on the spot. And even further yes, as the representative of our 'advisors', Eris also got a seat at the table.

"Oh, really?" Speaking of her, she scoffed at the other woman and presumably glared at her. I couldn't be sure thanks to how these communicator things worked, because all of them were facing our way and so it looked like she was glaring directly at us. "I let you know, Polemos and I aren't just familiar with each other. We have developed quite a close relationship since our first meeting."

"I just warned you not to use the Second True Archon's name in vain!"

"Why? Are you feeling inferior for not holding such a personal connection with him, I wonder?"

"Savir, please," the voice of our brand-new Minister of Homeland Defence interjected as his communicator lit up at the same time. "Can you just stop this?"

"I wasn't the one who started it, Gideon!" Eris hissed in return.

"I did not start anything!" Adva argued back just as vehemently, and was it just me, or her inflections were getting more and more like Savir's?

Putting all of that aside, I tapped my feet to signal my impatience, and Mike hurriedly started singing something. Then, after about ten more seconds, he let out a startled breath and said, "We've got a connection! Going live in three, two, one…!"

All of the holographic faces in front of me flickered, and I let out a disappointed sigh.

"Are you quite finished?"

"L-L-Lord Archon Polemos!" our Speaker stuttered and tried to bow, only to realize that by doing so, she wouldn't be visible on the communicator, so she hastily stood up straight again. "Glory to thy name!"

"Yes, yes. I'm happy to see you all too," I said with a disinterested voice. "We don't have all day, so speak up."

To put it simply, this meeting was something of a stop-gap. I couldn't be expected to routinely go back to the Elysium to check on the proceedings of the new government, but I also couldn't leave these guys completely to their own devices, because that was just asking for a disaster. As a compromise, we agreed on this: every few days, we would hold a meeting like this, where the newly appointed ministers, department heads, and Eris would voice their proposals that they felt required the oversight or approval of an Archon.

"First off," an older gentleman with a rather sad hairline spoke up. I tried my best to memorize the names and faces of all of them, but it was a work in process. If my memory served right, he was the Minister of Agri— "I would like to request the Lord Archon's permission to perform a comprehensive census among the population of Elysium."

Minister of the Interior. Yes, that's what I was going to say. I could totally remember seeing him in Tsephanyah's entourage, so it only made sense. Yes.

"Permission granted, next."

"Lord Polemos, may your clemency befall upon all of us," a decidedly weasely looking man sputtered in a hurry, and he was the… "When can we expect the return of Her Grace Deus?"

"Not a relevant question, next."

He looked a bit disappointed by my blunt refusal, but his place was immediately taken by the next questioner, and I tried my best to rush through them as fast as possible. Most of them were simple inquiries, like asking for permission to move the offices of the Ministry of Finances to Migdál Glaukós, or whether I agreed to sell our agricultural products outside of Elysium. I gave them straightforward answers, and occasionally berated them whenever they came to me with something so simple they should've just solved it on their own ages ago.

Then, at last, Eris spoke up. It felt like she was waiting for everyone else to finish first, and so I gestured for her to speak her mind.

"Since you have proclaimed that flight within Elysium is now permitted to all citizens…"

"Address the Lord Archon properly!" Adva hissed at her, and Eris rolled her eyes before starting over.

"Since you, the Second True Archon, have allowed it, the increasing air traffic in Elysium has become a rather problematic matter. Without regulations in place, the number of accidents has reached triple digits over the past week."

"Yes. And?"

"What is your view on the issue?" Eris asked directly and ignored the fuming woman over the middle communicator. "As someone who lived in the era before the initial prohibition, I'm sure you must recall the rules in place at the time."

Before I knew it, my brows descended into a frown. Was she trying to heckle me? Maybe she was suspecting that I didn't have Polemos's memories after all, and she was trying to get me to slip up? Or was she serious? When I turned that frown into a glare, she seemed genuinely flustered for a moment, so it was possible.

"Did I say something wrong… O Archon?" she tagged on the end and looked rather confused by my reaction. She could've been pretending, but she never struck me as a good actress, so for the moment, I let go of my suspicions.

"Eris. You should know best of all that those rules and regulations regarding flight safety should still be written down in the archives," I told her flatly, yet she not only didn't respond, she outright froze up for a second.

"Lord Archon," another voice, an elderly woman, joined the conversation. She was the Minister of Culture, and she looked rather apologetic. "I'm afraid many of the parchments of Hymnos from your age were lost in the recent fire in the archives. While it is possible the tomes you refer to may have been rescued in time, we are still in the process of assessing the damage, and thus finding them in their temporary storage may prove to be prohibitively time-consuming."

Now it was my turn to freeze up, but it only lasted for a moment before I forced a poker face and rubbed my chin.

"I see. I did not consider that." I nodded to myself a few times, for show. "In that case, I will consult with Deus, and we'll write down everything we remember."

"Thank you, O benevolent Archon!" the old Celestial lady bowed, and I turned back to Eris.

"I'll bring the notes to you the next time I'm in Elysium."

"Ah. Lord Archon!" Adva called out to me. "The Matriarch might have brought up the topic, but since this has nothing to do with the Cult of Deus, I recommend that Your Grace contact Minister Anophalakros instead."

"You little—!"

Eris's hiss was cut short by the aforementioned Minister of the Interior butting in.

"Why, yes, that would be most agreeable, O Lord Archon."

"We'll discuss the details later," I stated hurriedly. "If there aren't any other topics to discuss, I recommend we conclude the meeting right now."

"As the Second True Archon wishes," the young-ish Minister of Justice agreed on the spot, meaning nobody else could bring up anything new anymore, and after some customary farewells, Mike cut the connection on our side. Just before Eris and Adva started quarrelling again.

Normally I would've been annoyed by how it felt less like I was talking to seasoned politicians and leaders, and more like a bunch of headstrong kids, but this time, there was something else that was sending shivers down my spine.

"Raz?"

"Hm? Yes?" Moose had a stack of notes, and I interrupted him just as he was about to square them on the table. "Was there a problem?"

"Maybe. What was that bit about the fire in the archives?"

"Oh, that?" Michael chimed in, seemingly waiting for the opportunity to contribute. "Don't you remember? Bel of the Abyss set the place ablaze a while ago."

"It was not long after you returned from Elysium," Moose added and tucked his notes under his arm. "No one knows how he did it, or why, but I guess that's just how Bel of the Abyss operates in general."

"Oh, okay," I whispered, feeling a little light-headed.

I definitely didn't do that, and I didn't remember the event ever coming up in the past, so… was this detail changed by the retcon? Why? What would be the point? And even more importantly…

"For the record, how widespread is this?"

"The news about the arson?" Mike pondered for a while. "I don't think many people know about it outside of Elysium. I mean, it was a big deal, but then bigger things happened, so people kinda forgot about it."

"Even you did," Moose joked (I hoped).

"Good. The less people know about it on the island, the better," I muttered, and while they didn't get it, the two Celestial intelligence agents in my employ nodded along anyway. It didn't make me feel much better though.

Oh god… I can't let Elly learn about this, or I'll never hear the end of it…

PART 3

In a blink of an eye, it was Sunday evening already. Though again, that might be overstating things a little. I had a whole lot of things to do to make time fly by, such as helping everyone choose their outfits for the banquet, and I promised to let Tajana visit the Fauns, which also ate up half an afternoon, and so on. There were also other miscellaneous bits and bobs to take care of, as always, but none of that was terribly important.

"So? What's the plan?" Judy inquired at my side, making me pause.

I was pretty sure we had already discussed the outline before, so she should've already known. Maybe it was for the benefit of Elly, who wasn't there the last time we talked?

Speaking of her, my draconic girlfriend was wearing the same kind of fiery red evening dress she did the last time we attended a big Draconian gala event, her face extra-bright and her hair extra-drilly. In contrast, Judy opted for a more discreet sky-blue gown and a matching hair bow from her steadily growing collection. They looked pretty as always, but not flashy, which was just perfect, considering we weren't supposed to be the stars of the party.

But back to her inquiry. First thing first, I pulled the princess a little closer to make sure she was in on the conversation.

"The plan," I whispered so that the others behind us wouldn't overhear it. "The plan is to observe the scene and see how much the events will adhere to tropes without direct Narrative influence. There's no need to stress too much over it though; I'll be on the lookout, so you can just enjoy the party."

"In that case, I'll look for familiar faces," Elly whispered back, followed by a slightly disappointed, "It's too bad Vivien went home last week."

If my memory served right, that was her old friend. The one who asked for my autograph in the past. While Critias became the cradle of the Draconic Federation, and lots of Draconian families bought estates here, they weren't, strictly speaking, living on the island. Since they couldn't stay away from their homes for months at a time just to hang around here, it made sense that some of them would've left already.

But speaking of estates, this time the party wasn't held at the Dracis's, but at a smaller (yet just as lavish) mansion owned by the Lotans near the edge of Archytas, another port town on the southern shore of Critias. Furthermore, since the weather was pretty nice, the event was held outdoors. When we arrived, I could see a big swimming pool in the back of the estate, so I wondered if this technically counted as a 'pool party', but I quickly shook the idle thought out of my mind and adopted a more dignified expression just as we were about to enter the venue.

"Sir Leonard Blackcloak Dunning, Third Seat of the Draconic Council, Grand Master of Ordo Draconis, Second True Archon of Elysium, and family!"

I couldn't help but squint my eyes at the young crier at the door announcing our arrival. I never liked to be reminded of all the titles I've been saddled with, but at least he only shouted out the most relevant ones. On one hand, I was happy that the silly Chimera-slayer moniker was finally buried under the rest, but on the other, I didn't know how to feel about 'Blackcloak' somehow becoming my unofficial middle name.

As for the 'family' part…

"H-Hauu… I didn't expect there would be so many people watching."

Penny's complaints were directed to my other sister, but before Snowy could react, Dame Morgana chided her with a soft, "Penelope, dear. Please mind your manners when we're in public."

"Y-Yes."

She hastily straightened her back and my sisters followed after us. So did the two senior Knights, all dressed appropriately for the occasion. This was the first official appearance of the Dunning household in the social circles of the Draconic Federation, and it turned a couple of heads. At least until the next big announcement.

"Lady Angeline Deus Dionne, First True Archon of Elysium, and her Justicar!" the greeter cried out, and glancing over my shoulder, I could see a nervously waving Angie and a stone-faced Josh enter the venue behind us. They were in their white, asymmetric Deus garbs, and I had to admit, they looked pretty fine standing next to each other.

We waited for them to catch up to us, a downtime which I used to glance around. I joked about the pool party before, but the banquet really was held around the swimming pool. Of course, nobody was taking a dip in the middle of a banquet, so it only served as a backdrop. The courtyard was spacious and surrounded by perfectly rectangular hedges that just started to sprout leaves, enclosing a flat area covered with impeccable lawn, well-maintained footpaths, and the occasional neatly sculpted evergreen shrub. The place was currently dotted with fancy tables set with even fancier tablecloths and trays full of finger foods and drinks, while the live classical music in the background created a dignified atmosphere.

I didn't count, but by my estimate, there were over a hundred people at the scene. Most of them were Draconians from various families, but based on the different outfits, I could also see a couple of Assembly representatives here and there. And that was not counting the serving staff dressed in old-school butler and maid outfits while catering to the guests. Draconians really liked that kind of thing.

I could see a lot of familiar faces, mostly people I tangentially knew due to Draconic Federation work, but none of the main actors of today's play were in sight yet. Meanwhile, my group naturally congregated around me, so I looked them over and gave a few short instructions.

"Everyone, go and mingle a bit. Keep your wits about you, and stay out of trouble." After a beat, I turned to face Angie. "That one was aimed at you."

"I get it, I get it. Geez…" she grumbled, but a moment later she perked up and tugged on Josh's arm. "Look! They've got a smorgasbord! Let's check it out!"

"… Am I the only one who's having a déja vu here?" the guy mumbled under his nose, but nobody had a chance to respond before he was pulled away by his enthusiastic girlfriend.

Just like that, the childhood friend couple broke away from our cluster, soon followed by Arnwald and Morgana when they found some familiar faces in the crowd. Penny and Snowy awkwardly followed behind them, ultimately leaving me with my girlfriends.

"Do we mingle too?" came the straightforward question from Elly.

"If you'd like to. Be on the lookout for Naoren, Rinne, and Yseult."

"I can do the first two, but I'd like to remind you that I had never met this Yseult woman before," Judy pointed out.

"She's tall and pretty and likes to wear sparkly evening gowns," Elly responded before I could, and she received a deadpan look screaming 'Do you know how little that narrows it down?' for her trouble.

"Blonde, looks to be in her late twenties, used to have one of those fluffy beehive hairdos from the sixties."

"Oh. I think I have seen her before then, but I'm not sure I could recognize her in the crowd," she admitted. Apparently, even eidetic memory had its limits.

"Don't stress over it," Elly encouraged her by patting her shoulder. "If I see her, I'll point her out for you."

"If you find her, monitor her from a distance," I spoke absent-mindedly while my eyes scanned the courtyard. "Our role today is to be passive observers and to maybe provide backup in case things take a turn for the strange."

"Hm."

Judy looked doubtful for a moment, so I stopped looking around and faced her.

"Yes, Dormouse? Is there a problem?"

"I'm trying to figure out if what you just said counts as jinxing or not."

"Actually," Elly cut in with a thoughtful frown on her brows. "Isn't pointing out that someone is tempting fate the thing that makes it a jinx?"

"That's… a novel idea."

I let the two of them continue that discussion on their own and focused my attention on the banquet. Since this wasn't a fully Draconian party, I hoped things wouldn't get too rowdy, but just to be sure, I told everyone to move in pairs and try to stay out of the scuffles of others.

"You dare!?"

Like that one, where two male guests suddenly started throwing their fists, probably over some perceived insult or another. It said something about Draconian attitudes that the crowd only made some space for them and continued their small talk as if there was nothing out of the ordinary going on. Heck, even the live cello performance coming from the small stage set up at the corner of the courtyard continued on uninterrupted, giving a rather clashing soundtrack to the unfolding fisticuffs.

Anyhow, I took my own advice, and since this had nothing to do with me or my companions, I gave that whole situation a wide berth. I expected that this would be the most action-packed highlight of today's party and for good riddance. After the madness of the past couple of months, this was nice.

But… the fact that nothing pressing was happening also gave me lots of time to introspect. About me, and the Narrative, and the Simulacrum in general. Maybe I've been doing too much of that as of late, but I couldn't help it. I mean, it wasn't like I was doing all that ruminating on purpose, it was just a response to all of the new meta-information and the resulting existential instability and whatnot. At least, that's how I rationalized it.

Psychology was hard, so let's act like the average responsible adult and repress the hell out of my troubling thoughts by focusing on the present. So, what was I doing here again? Besides sneakily tasting some wine while nobody was looking, I mean?

"Eh… This isn't for me," I concluded after a few sips and put the glass I've taken from a tray down. Today wasn't the day I would start drinking, it seemed.

More importantly, the evening's goal wasn't just to gawk at the development of Naoren's and Rinne's relationship and its tribulations like some old wives with too much free time on their hands. Sure, our presence here was prompted by my distaste for the contract romance genre and all the misunderstanding and miscommunication tropes that came with it, but it was just that. It motivated me on a personal level, but it wasn't the real reason.

Simply put, I needed context. To this day, even after digesting everything I absorbed by merging with other-me, I wasn't entirely sure about the scope and limits of what Narrative-me was doing all this time. I understood the plot, and I understood some of the means by which Narrative-me was steering it, but not the whole picture.

If I wanted to take over that role from the inside, first I had to figure out what other universal tropes were still in play in the Simulacrum. It was important to know, not just to avoid annoying ones (like tempting fate resulting in predictable consequences), but because with just the right approach, those tropes could also be turned into tools to work for me.

But why stop there? What about going even bigger, and trying to change the genre altogether? I was always worried that killing someone, anyone, even a bastard as aggravating as Percival, would change the tone of the Simulacrum, altering the common tropes and making things darker and more dangerous. If those tropes weren't enforced by Narrative-me, but the Simulacrum's framework itself, then I could do the opposite and enforce safer and less annoying developments by nudging the tone and genre in a different direction. Within limits, of course, as it still had to be about Josh and Angie.

Since I reminded myself of them, I looked around a bit and quickly found the childhood friend couple. They were near one of the tables, surrounded by a whole lot of girls. I could've moved over to check what they were talking about, but a quick Far Glance could do the job just as well, and I soon let out a hum. Angie was surprisingly popular. Either that, or these Draconian girls' parents sent them out to flatter her and make connections while she was still young and approachable.

"And you see, they… I mean, we have these beautiful white spiral towers, and when you're at the top, you can see the entire island!"

"That sounds amazing, Lady Angeline! I wish I could see it with my own eyes!" a girl with short blue hair and dreamy eyes spoke up, putting on hand on her cheek and sighing wistfully.

"Such wonders," another girl, slightly older than her, spoke with a melodic yet calculating voice. "They often say that great leaders create great feats of architecture."

"If that's true," a third, short girl with black hair immediately capitalized on the opportunity and hastily interjected herself into the conversation. "Then Lady Angeline must be a great leader indeed."

"It was Grandpa Deus who had them built, but… thanks for the compliment?"

Angie didn't seem to mind (or notice) the clumsy bootlicking and continued describing the Elysium to the eager ears around her, while Josh remained poker-faced and vigilant even as he was liberally sampling the nearby smorgasbord.

Normally he would've been more enthusiastic about trying new food, so I figured either the assassination attempt had caused him to be more serious in public, or he was just trying really hard to play the role of the 'mysterious white knight protecting his lady' archetype, even if he wasn't fully aware of doing it. Anyhow, they seemed fine, so I checked on the others.

I found Penny and Snowy standing near the cellist on the temporary stage, though they weren't listening to the music.

"C-Could it be that you didn't want to come to this party?" Penny whispered in a mortified voice. "Did… did I mess up?"

"No, don't worry about it," my Abyssal sister reassured her. "This is… nice. It's just that I have a lot on my mind, with Percival and everything."

"What does Uncle Percy have to do with anything?" Penny muttered, and then suddenly her eyes opened wide as saucers. "Are you worried that he didn't lose his memories? Is he lying?"

"I don't know, but… It doesn't really matter."

She must've meant that it didn't change the 'homework' I gave her, but Penny immediately misunderstood it.

"R-Right… Even if he didn't have amnesia, Brother wouldn't have let us meet him if he was a bad guy, so it must be fine. Yeah, there must be some kind of misunderstanding. Or something we don't understand. Or maybe…"

Snowy continued to silently listen to Penny's worries, at least until the music changed, and the two of them decided to try dancing instead of moping around. Good call, by the way. If they didn't, I would've had to go over to shake them out of their melancholy myself.

Moving on, I Far Glanced at Arnwald, and I found him and Morgana surrounded by a group of adults, sitting by the pool and sipping cocktails delivered by the serving staff.

"I never knew you two were already married!" a middle-aged lady spoke up with a pleased smile, and the man next to her (probably her husband) hummed along while patting his belly.

"Sir Arnwald, you sneaky devil! I thought you were so cold to all your admirers in the office because you were married to your job, but to find you kept such a secret from us all this time! Just wait until the rest of the folks in the club learn about this!"

Club? Was Arnwald part of some social club? I felt like I was missing some context, but I couldn't linger on that for much before my attention was grabbed by Morgana's reaction.

"Dear? What is this about admirers?"

"Just… Just a silly misunderstanding, I assure you."

"Oh my!" Left of where the two were sitting, a slightly tipsy elderly woman whom I have occasionally seen during the meetings of the Dracon Council let out a chuckle. She took a lazy sip from her martini glass and said, "I think we can make an educated guess about who's wearing the pants in your relationship."

"Our relationship is… not as simple as it seems on the surface," Arnwald tried to object, but Morgana reached out and took his hand.

"Dear, don't let yourself be teased like that."

"… Yes. You're right, Morgana. I shouldn't let my pride get the best of me."

"Exactly," she smiled and held his hand even firmer before she continued in a deceptively sweet tone. "So, can we talk about those admirers of yours in detail?"

Her question caused the group to erupt into laughter, and with a shake of my head, I cut my Far Sight and returned to my body. Surprisingly enough, our senior Knights were remarkably popular among the middle class of Draconian society; the couples surrounding them belonged to the 'subordinate families' working under the big clans like the Feilongs, the Dracis, or the Albions. They were the ones running the administration and day-to-day business of the Draconic Federation, so it made sense that, as my usual stand-in, Arnwald had gotten to know them. The fact they were all having a light-hearted conversation despite being mortal enemies just half a year ago spoke volumes of the adaptability of everyone involved.

But speaking of classes, if these people were the equivalent of middle-class white-collar workers of the Draconic Federation, then my girlfriends were currently surrounded by the upper crust of Draconian society; the heads and heirs of big families still roleplaying as aristocracy. They also seemed to be having a good time gossiping among themselves, and I was just about to Far Glance their way in turn when I finally realized something.

Why was I the only one left alone?

Everyone else was mingling fine, while I was on my lonesome, drifting from one end of the courtyard to the other while occasionally picking up a snack or drink from the tables. When I passed them by, people would greet me, or at the very least nod, but nobody approached me to talk. Not that I minded, but still… was I discriminated against?

Or maybe they were just wary of me. After all, I was the leader of the Celestials (both on paper and in reality, as much as I hated to admit it), so maybe they felt uncomfortable in my presence. No, wait. Then why was everyone fine with Angie and Josh?

Suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious, I was contemplating whether I should go over to the girls and ask if I made some weird social faux pas without realizing it, but just as I was about to move, the announcer at the door drew my attention.

"Sir Naoren Feilong, Head of Clan Feilong, Second Seat of the Draconic Council, and his escort!"

Over at the gates leading to the courtyard, I saw Naoren enter with Rinne awkwardly fidgeting by his side. They were both dressed in a mixture of Western formal wear with some East Asian flairs and embroidery, and the way they were walking arm in arm raised a few surprised brows among the onlookers. As expected, really. Now, only the last piece of the puzzle was missing, and…

"Hmpf!"

The unexpected harrumph coming from my left made me automatically turn in that direction, and my gaze landed on its source. A pale young woman (though with Draconian physiology, exact ages were hard to guess), her platinum blonde hair reaching down to the small of her back and looking none too pleased by what she was seeing. She wore an ocean-blue dress that hugged her figure, its folds and frills designed to look like wave crests and with small tear-shaped gemstones speckled onto its surface. She also had long, white evening gloves and a fur-trimmed collar, and overall, she managed to stand out of the already lavishly dressed crowd.

Yep, that was definitely Yseult Albion all right. How the hell did I miss her until now when she was looking like that? It wasn't like I was under Narrative Influence to ignore her until the right moment. Or was I? Did I subconsciously overlook her so that her appearance would be more dramatic?

"Man… being the Narrative is hard."

While I was only mumbling that under my breath, she still noticed me and turned a pair of turquoise eyes towards my direction.

"Hm? Did you say something?"

Her voice was cordial, but a little cold, and she even took out a folded-up hand fan from somewhere and lightly tapped it against her palm. Yup, that's just what a 'villainess' would do in a vaguely Victorian-era romance story all right, meaning my hunch was probably on the money. Heck, I was pretty sure that the only reason she was missing the oujo drills was because it would've overlapped with Elly's aesthetics, and the Simulacrum didn't like that. But more importantly, if my guesses based on genre conventions were right so far, it meant…

"Oh, don't mind me," I told her with a self-deprecating smile and took a step back. "I'm just here to watch the show unfold. Carry on."

PART 4

Lady Yseult gave me a rather critical look, but whatever retort she had on the tip of her tongue had to be swallowed back when the cello music in the background abruptly cut out and a tall, if slightly heavy-set woman took to the stage with a microphone in hand. She had a tan complexion and a simple black dress of a rather conservative cut.

"Thank you for attending our banquet, dear guests," the woman spoke, her voice deep and sonorous, and that finally jostled the gears in my head enough to recognize her: she was the wife of the Lotan patriarch, currently away on a business trip, and the host of today's party.

Publicly addressing the guests like this wasn't anything out of the ordinary, but the timing was quite conspicuous, so I lightly nodded in the direction of the blonde Draconian matriarch and sidled over to the side of my girlfriends, idling on the edge of the crowd gathering near the stage.

"I see you've found her," Judy noted absently as soon as I came within earshot, and I shrugged.

"It would be more accurate to say we stumbled into each other."

"Is this one of those 'event' things?" Elly inquired the moment she had my attention, and Judy responded in my stead.

"The timing is too tight to be a coincidence, so it probably is," she concluded, and I nodded along.

"Let's observe."

"Let's," my dear assistant nodded, and tried as she might to hide it, I could see that she was clearly curious about how the situation would develop.

On the other hand, the princess had much less interest in the tropes of this genre of romance fiction and was looking at things from a much more practical perspective.

"Do you think they're going to fight?"

"The heroine and the villainess fighting at this stage of the plot? That's…" I wanted to say 'preposterous', but then I gave it another thought and muttered, "Actually, considering it's a Draconian matriarch and Mountain Girl we're talking about here, it might be in the cards."

"The Chief is right. It would go against the contract marriage romance template, but it would fit ours."

"That being… what was it? Battle harem?" When I nodded, the princess let out a groan and massaged her forehead. "It's hard enough to keep those trope things in mind, and now we also have to deal with genres…"

"The two are not mutually exclusive."

Judy earned herself a displeased pout from the princess with that response, but in the meantime I was pondering about what she just said.

"You know, if you think about it, the current main scenario isn't a battle harem story anymore. I think we're more of an urban fantasy at this point."

"Hush, Chief. We can split hairs after the event is over."

I didn't argue and gazed at the stage, where the Lotan matriarch was patiently waiting for everyone to pay attention to her. After a minute or so, once everyone who mattered gathered in one place, she cleared her throat and raised her microphone to her face again.

"I would especially like to welcome the esteemed clan head of Clan Feilong, Mister Naoren Feilong, who not only graced our dinner party with his presence, but I've been told he chose this occasion to make an important announcement!"

When she said that, the crowd in the middle parted like the Red Sea before Moses, with only Naoren and Rinne standing in the gap. I could see them due to my height advantage, but the girls weren't so lucky, so I had to narrate the events.

"Naoren and Mountain Girl are in the center of the attention now. He looks unflappable as usual, while she's… making the best wooden board impression I've ever seen in my life."

"Leo. That's rude," the princess complained, yet all I could do was shrug.

"But accurate."

Meanwhile, the two of them walked over to the stage and stood right in front of it. Soon, he received the microphone from the hostess and looked all over the crowd before inhaling deeply.

"Thank you for your attention, everyone."

"It's starting," I told the girls. "Count the tropes."

"These are tumultuous times. The World of Mystics have changed tremendously in such a short time, turning over the heaven and the earth. Old enemies became staunch allies, legendary existences of old walk among us once more, and the world is filled with hidden dragons and crouching tigers."

"Is… that a trope?" Elly whispered, but Judy shook her head.

"No, that's just a preamble," I told her and focused my attention on the unfolding scene.

"My life has changed as well, no small part thanks to a chance meeting." Naoren paused and pulled Mountain Girl closer. I could tell she was clearly suffering from stage fright, because she moved like a mannequin. "It was fate that brought us together, and thus I would like to officially announce my engagement with—"

"Stop!"

An icy voice interrupted the proceedings, and Judy immediately nodded.

"That's a trope."

"That was quick," Elly muttered, sounding slightly disappointed.

In the meantime Yseult sauntered forward, and while I could only see the back of her head, I had a feeling she was glaring at the duo at the forefront.

"Lady Yseult? Why are you interrupting our—?"

"I said stop. Say no more." Strangely enough, she wasn't yelling, yet her voice was clearly audible even in the back. "I thought we already discussed this, Naoren. You don't have to do this just to placate those geriatric fuckers."

"That's… an unexpected choice of words," Judy noted, while Elly was busy stifling a chuckle. The sudden f-bomb must've been so surprising, it sent her into a giggling fit.

"Yseult, please. Don't make a scene," Naoren pleaded, and while looking around, his eyes landed on me, obviously asking for support. It wasn't quite time for that yet, especially after the next bombshell dropped.

"I'm not making a scene! You're making a scene! Didn't I tell you that if you're being bothered by your elders, you should just give me a call? Didn't we already promise, back during your coming-of-age celebration, that if either of us were about to be pressured into a loveless political marriage, we would help each other out?"

"Oooh? A childhood promise?" Judy's eyes lit up with recognition.

"That's a trope," Elly proclaimed, and then suddenly turned sullen. "But now I feel... Are childhood marriage promises really this common?"

"No need to get awkward about that, princess. It's water under the bridge, anyway."

I tried to cheer her up by patting her back, my attention still focused on the unfolding event.

"I believe you are laboring under a misunderstanding," Naoren stated loudly and with confidence, and after a beat, he gingerly put a hand around Rinne's waist and hugged her against his chest. "My engagement to Lady Rinne isn't political in nature."

"Like hell it isn't!" she swore again and aggressively flicked her fan open before pointing it at Mountain Girl.

"Is that a trope?" Elly asked, already over her sudden onset of remembrance-induced embarrassment.

"The villainess gesturing with her fan at the heroine during a big public denouncement event? It's one of the biggest tropes there is," Judy responded, and while I would've liked to add that it only applied to a very particular sub-genre of romance, I didn't get the opportunity.

"Just look at her!" Yseult exclaimed, meaning Rinne, and moved her fan to cover her mouth. "She looks like she doesn't even want to be anywhere near you!"

"Lady Rinne is just… not used to this kind of attention." Naoren was trying to excuse Mountain Girl's world-class dead fish impersonation routine, but he wasn't convincing anyone with that. When she remained stock still, he desperately looked in my direction again, hoping for a save, and to be honest, I had half a mind to intervene.

Unfortunately, while I was hesitating, Yseult noticed the direction the bespectacled patriarch was looking at. Following his line of sight, she also quickly found me in the crowd. It wasn't hard, as I was about a head taller than the people in front of me. When our eyes met, her brows furrowed and her nose scrunched up, as if she just saw something unpleasant, and then a moment later she folded her fan and pointed it my way.

"This is all his fault, isn't it? He was the one who put you up to this! Let me guess! 'Marrying my subordinate shows that we're closely knit, and that's good for the stability of the Draconic Federation'? Or did he use some kind of leverage on you to get you to play along?"

"Yseult, please! I assure you; you are entirely incorrect in your assumptions about Brother Leonard! Please stop this, and let us continue this conversation in private."

"No, I don't think so," she declared, and after sending one last glare at me, she turned back to Rinne and, using the fingers holding the fan, peeled off her long evening glove from her free arm and balled it up. "We have to do this the old-fashioned way! Hey, wench! I challenge you to a duel!"

Then, before anyone could react, she backhand threw the glove at Rinne's confounded face. Except…

"What the…?"

No. Nobody should've been able to react, let alone stop it, and yet it never hit her. Silence, like an ocean wave, washed and rippled across the venue as a gloved hand appeared and snatched the piece of cloth out of the air with the ease and alacrity of someone who had been practising just for this specific occasion for a long, long time.

"Chief? What happened?" Judy asked, getting on her tip-toes and trying to get a glimpse at the situation over the stunned shoulders of the people in front of us, but even she froze when a familiar voice hit our ears.

"Oh my. Please excuse me for interrupting this lovely get-together…"

The man who materialized out of thin air spoke in an upbeat, jaunty tone and lightly jerked the flimsy glove around like he was an old-timey passenger on a cruise ship waving goodbye to the shore with a handkerchief. Then he disappeared and casually showed up behind the hostess of the event, flicking the glove onto her. It landed on her head, and she was so shocked she failed to take it off even when he took the time to bow to her.

"Thank you for the hospitality, Mrs Whatsherface! I especially loved the snacks and the music and the melodrama! But alas…" The man on the stage, wearing a white tailcoat and a black mask everyone here would recognize at a glance, straightened his back and turned to face me. When our eyes met, I felt something like a jolt of electricity running down my spine, and I couldn't look away. Then, after a long pregnant silence, Bel of the Abyss solemnly stated, "… I'm afraid this cannot continue."