“So, let me get this straight…” I took a deep breath and sat up, the evil black book resting on the floor. “That is Putinov?” I pointed at the book on the ground.
“That is indeed what I said,” The Master said in my mind as I winced and clutched the side of my head.
Shortly after we had snatched the book from Putinov and the Master “sealed” the book, he had relinquished control back to me. Part of me wishes he hadn’t done that. The reason was that all the pain and sore muscles smacked me like a freight train. Whatever he had been doing to suppress my body’s protests was gone.
Thankfully, my magic reserves were still plentiful, and quickly I began to mutter a light rejuvenation spell under my breath. Within a few moments, the pain in my body began to ease as my ruined leg and torn muscles began to mend themselves. Once the pain was back to a manageable level, I kneeled and picked up the book. It was heavy, probably a good five or so pounds; I felt like I could beat someone to death with it. It also gave off bad vibes. Which sounds weird when mentioned out loud, but I wasn’t kidding. This thing made me uneasy. It was like an instinct to just toss this evil thing into Mt. Doom.
“How is that possible?” I asked as I turned and began to limp back into the reactor room with the heavy book tucked under my arm. “We both saw him. Hell we saw his corpse. How could he be this book?”
“That’s because his soul is in the book, Luna,” The Master said in his tone, implying that I should’ve known that.
“No need to sound like a smart ass. How was I supposed to know?” I asked, entering the large room, which was oddly silent.
To my right, where the soldiers had taken cover, what remained of them, about four people, were ticking their heads out nervously, weapons raised. To my left, I could see my mother and aunt slumped against the far wall near the metal stairs leading to the control room. Near them was Putinov’s corpse lying motionless. Or would it be a body? A vessel? I had no idea.
Picking my priorities. I turned to my mother and began to briskly limp over to them as the Master sighed and said, “You wouldn’t. My apologies. What you witnessed was a shell, a housing device.”
“For his soul?” I asked as I walked past the body. The man was lying partially on his side, eyes closed and face relaxed. It was almost as if he were sleeping. I think he was; the body was breathing. He looked so peaceful, and I hated it. I wanted to blast his face with a spark mote and blow him to pieces, but… I liked to think I had some kind of honor. As stupid as that sounded, I had to trust the Master. If he wasn’t a threat. I should leave the body be for now. Mother or that Lucien guy may have a better idea.
“Yes. If you’d let me finish, I was going to say that.” The Master huffed.
“Sorry.” I muttered as I kneeled before my unconscious mother. Reaching out to her and my aunt, I began to mutter another rejuvenation spell.
“As I was saying, the body beside you is not entirely Putinov. It’s a piece of him. From what I can see, the soul we have is not entirely his either–”
I fumbled with the incantation and blinked. “What?!” I shrilled. “You said we’re sa–”
"Yes, we are safe, Luna. Please, stop interrupting me,” And because the Master is so good at calming me down, he added, “We’re safe for now.”
“Once I wake up my mother, we’re having a nice, long chat,” I hissed as I restarted my incantation.
“That is why I asked you to come here.”
It only took me about a minute to fully heal any injuries my mother and aunt had suffered. Unfortunately, neither of them woke up, but the pained expressions they held faded, and now they appeared to be resting, which was fine with me. Up above, I heard the metallic door of the control creaking open.
“Excellent, le méchant est parti!” Lucien exalted. “That, blaireau, was annoying.” I glanced up to see the man peering down at me from the top of the stairs. “Was it you or Garl who took care of him?” He nodded to the body.
I blinked and opened my mouth, but before I could respond, the Master spoke, “Who do you think, Lucien?” His voice was sprinkled with a bit of annoyance.
In my head, I asked, You can speak to him?
"Indeed, he can…” Lucien said, his face hardening. “Garl, please tell me you aren’t annoyed–”
"Indeed, I am annoyed, Lucy.”
The Frenchman recoiled. “My name is not Lucy!”
“And my name is not, Garl.”
I raised my hands. “Can someone please tell me what the fuck is going on?”
“Whoa, whoa.” Lucien held his hands up. “Little ladies are not supposed–”
“I don’t have time for this,” I groaned. “Please. Someone. Anyone.”
Lucien snorted. “Unfortunately. We are almost out of time. At least, I am.”
I threw my arms up. “Of course! We’re always out of time, apparently.”
Lucien nodded. “Indeed we are, and this time. I mean it.” He held a hand up. “Oscar. Flip it!”
A loud metal thunk came from behind Lucien. “It’s best you and the others get up here; don’t worry, I’ll help.” He began to quickly come down the steps.
“What’s going on?” I asked hesitantly.
“My team and I.” Lucien motioned over his shoulder. “Is about to trigger an aetherophasic pulse. In other words.” He made a gesture of his fingers exploding outward. “Big, but not fatal, boom.”
“Huh?!”
“Luna, please listen to him. Once that pulse detonates. You and I will lose contact, temporarily.”
“Of fucking course,” I swore and immediately took note of the high-pitched hum emanating from the magrite pillar as well as its already blinding light becoming brighter.
With Lucien's help, we rounded up my mother, who was beginning to stir but still unable to walk, and Aunt Saria and quickly carried them into the control room. It wasn’t a large area; with the seven of us and the handful of chairs bolted in front of the consoles, the room was tightly packed.
Closing the door, Lucien breathed and said, “It’s been an honor serving with you all.” My heart sank, and looking at Oscar and the Yanks, I saw Oscar’s eyes bulging. Noticing our shocked looks, Lucien held his hands out. “So-sorry, I don’t mean that as in we’re going to die! I mean, that our mission is complete.” The man held an open palm to his forehead as he saluted us. “Till next time.” He nodded to me.
“Wait, what?” I gawked as the high-pitched hum grew louder, the light more blinding, and soon. The world distorted, sound twisted, and became nonsense. The colors once again became negative, and my stomach did somersaults as my brain screamed. Nothing felt right. My body felt empty; the air from my lungs was gone, and I couldn’t breathe. I tried to make my brain command my body, but nothing happened; I couldn’t feel a thing. I couldn’t see anything. It was like I was nowhere but everywhere, and suddenly. I was back.
All of us dropped to our knees, our hands clutching our heads. I couldn’t control myself; my stomach churned, and I vomited heavily onto the floor alongside a few others. Tears ran down my cheeks as I choked and sobbed as I tried to breathe sharply through my nose and out my mouth to calm my guts.
“What the fuck was that?!” I heard my mother gag as whatever the hell just happened snapped her awake.
I panted and whined for another minute and finally straightened up. Looking at where Lucien was, I was stunned but not surprised to find he was gone. Instead, I was furious. “You have to be kidding me?” I threw my hands up into the air and groaned as I slumped back onto my calves and rested on my knees.
For what felt like a minute, I stared at the door where Lucien had been standing shortly before. The others behind me groggily regained their senses, and I heard my mother cough heavily before she asked, “Luna, what is going on? What happened?”
Her voice snapped me back to the present, and I winced as my head throbbed with a migraine that just wouldn’t go away. I reached up and rubbed my temple gently as I turned to look at my mother. “I-I don’t know… I-I think we won?” I said with an uplift, unsure of what happened.
“Indeed,” Oscar said with a cough of his own. He cleared his throat. “If everything went well. Pulse disrupt machines.”
“What machines?” I asked as I grunted and got to my feet, careful not to step in the bile on the floor. My nose wrinkled as the nauseating scent of bile began to permeate around the room.
“Ones in cylinders,” Oscar tried to say. “The ones that fell from the sky. We tuned the machine." He gestured to the console. “To dispel magic, as Lucien said.”
Oh shit, I briefly thought. Well, that’s good to hear they’re disabled now… I hope.
That wasn’t enough for my mother. “I mean, what happened to Saria and me? Who attacked us?”
“The archbishop did,” I said to her, and then immediately, my heart leaped into my throat.
The book! My head swiveled left and right, and immediately, I sighed with relief when I found the black book on the floor. Except the crystal embedded in it was the thing that housed Putinov’s soul—or at least a part of it—and it was shattered.
Uh-oh… Uh… These were the only helpful thoughts that came to my mind. Man, I’m great during emergencies, not.
I bent down and picked up the heavy book. “This book came to life and attacked us,” I told her. “It contained Putinov’s soul, or at least that’s what the Master said, but now… now it’s broken.” I gulped and showed everyone the shattered crystal.
“It housed his soul?” My mother blinked slowly.
“Part of it,” I said. “The body we saw, the Master said, was some kind of empty shell he used to carry the book.” I bit my lower lip, hoping I remembered that correctly.
My mother’s face scrunched with perplexion. An expression I was not keen on. With her being the magical expert and all here, I was not inspired at all when I heard her audibly say, “Huh?”
“Momma?” I prompted her. “Would that be spirimancy?”
My mother’s tired, groggy look softened as she shifted to her knees and rested back on her calves as she smoothed out her clothes. She glanced at the floor and then shrugged. “I would think so… Soul transferring is something I’m not familiar with. I don’t think anyone except for the few scholars who study spirimancy is. Unfortunately, I-I think I’m out of my element here.”
“Aye. So am I.” Oscar grunted with a firm nod before turning back towards the three yanky soldiers who were squabbling.
That’s when my heart leaped into my throat again. The surviving soldiers outside the containment room! They would’ve been caught directly in that ather-pulse if what we experienced sealed in the control was terrible. I feared what those four remaining soldiers went through, if they survived at all.
“Luna, wait!” My mother called to me, but I ignored her as I jumped to my feet and went for the door. With a hefty grunt, I shoved the metal door partially open and squeezed through the gap. The air outside smelt burnt and heavy with ozone. I wanted to gag, but instead, I opted to pull the collar of my blouse up and over my nose. It did little to stop the smell.
Hopping down the steps, I reached the ground floor and scanned the area. Immediately to my left beside the stairs was—not Putinov’s corpse, but a pile of gore. A mushy, bloody mound of flesh that vaguely resembled the shape of the formerly sleeping body.
My gut churned, and I nearly screamed as I clenched my eyes shut and looked away. Taking sharp breaths through my nose and out my mouth, I calmed my queasy tummy and prayed that the soldiers did not suffer a similar fate as I pushed onwards.
The room was dim. While still active, the sizeable magrite pillar in the center emitted a deep hum, and the light it cast was dim and no longer blinding. I could feel a faint vibration in the air coming from it in waves, and such a feeling did little to make my poor stomach feel better, but I pressed forward, scanning everywhere I could find the survivors.
To my relief. They were fine. At least as fine as they could be right now. I found the four remaining soldiers on the far end of the room below the area where I and the Master hid when clinging to the ceiling. They were behind large metal beams, possibly taking shelter from whatever happened to the magrite pillar before the pulse.
All four of them were unconscious, pale, and covered in bile. Everyone was regretting having eaten a hefty breakfast and lunch today. Their breathing was shallow, and I’ll admit I wasn’t a certified doctor, but from a preliminary check-over. I could give their chances of survival a solid gold, maybe. I tried to cast a rejuvenation on each of them, but as Oscar and Lucien said, there was no magic after that pulse.
I felt empty. Not in the sense of spell fatigue. Spell fatigue isn’t the same as having no magic, or mana, or ether, or whatever you want to call it. Spell fatigue is like muscle fatigue; it’s how much your body can take channeling ether. In this case, I wasn’t fatigued; I just had no ether to channel.
Which was once again infuriating. I felt so useless. This entire day, I felt useless. I don’t know what’s going on; I feel out of my element, and it’s like I have no control. I thought I was, but then shit went south after the Rusivite attack, and then some stranger started bitching at my family, telling us we needed to stop the archbishop. Fuck, I don’t even know who that guy was or is. Everything is happening so fast. I just can’t take it anymore, dammit.
“Luna!” I heard my mother call out to me from the other end of the reactor. I pulled back from the unconscious soldier and turned towards her voice. She stood at the top of the stairs beside the control room, leaning over the railing. “Is everything okay?” She called over to me.
Not really. I wanted to say. I was magicless, clueless, and overall just worthless. You would think I’m being hard on myself, but think about it. What had I really done since shit went south? Nothing. At most, I was a pilot for the Master who immediately took over when things got kinetic. I understand that I’m just a kid again; I have no skills. Yes, I can make things go boom with my spells and do a couple of neat magic tricks, but that doesn’t mean I know how to implement them effectively. The brute force worked at the prison because I had allies. If it wasn’t for the Master assuming control of me, Putinov would’ve just splattered me against the wall or disappeared me like he did those soldiers.
I have no agency. I have no control, and it stinks, dammit. I balled my fists and took a deep breath. Stop bitching. I told myself. Embrace the suck. Things will get better… will they?
I heard my mother call out to me again as she began to come down the stairs, and I swallowed down the lump of self-pity. “I-I’m okay!” I shouted back. “I-I was just checking on these guys.” I gestured to the unconscious soldiers, my voice wavering as my adrenaline came down.
As I got to my feet, my body trembled. My head and body throbbed, and the magic I had used to relieve the pain was dismissed when the pillar erupted. The moment my mother hit the bottom of the stairs, she jogged over to me, and I met her halfway. Without a word, she dropped to her knees and threw her arms around me, pulling me into a soft hug.
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With my face buried in her bosom, I merely closed my eyes and allowed myself to relax as she gripped me tightly and stroked my hair. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, “I-I wasn’t paying attention. If I had noticed the book I-”
“It’s okay, Momma,” I mumbled back as I wrapped my arms around her and returned the hug. “The Master protected me.”
My mother snorted and smiled. “He did more than protect you,” she said, though I hinted at a note of jealousy in her tone. “He stopped whatever was going on.”
“And Oscar.” I added, and she simply nodded.
“Did he… possess you again?” My mother asked hesitantly, and I responded with a nod. I felt her tense after that.
“If he hadn’t done so,” I said slowly but in a soft voice, “we wouldn’t have won.” I sniffed. “And I hate that,” I heard myself saying. “I don’t like this, Momma.”
“I know you don’t,” she cooed and stroked my hair.
Inside I could feel my heart swelling as emotions I could hardly control boiled over. “I wanna go home,” I choked up as my head throbbed more and my legs quivered. “I want to go back to how things were. I hate running away, I hate seeing people get hurt, and I hate being out of the loop. Why is everything going to crap?”
My mother held me a little tighter as she kissed the top of my head. “I don’t know, Sweetie. I wish I could tell you why, and I wish I could fix things for you.” Her voice also quivered. “I wish I could protect you better.”
I took in a couple of sharp breaths to try and calm my nerves. “You are protecting me,” I said, though my mother shook her head.
“No. Not as well as I should’ve.” She sniffed and pulled back to look at me. Yet, as our eyes met, her face broke, and she hugged me again. “All of this is my fault.” She gripped me tighter as her voice cracked. “I-If I had tr-trusted Lorzio’s words more… if I hadn’t hesitated. We wouldn’t be here… none of this wouldn’t have happened.” She cried.
I blinked and froze. “Mr. Blaxen?” I asked, my eyes wide as I stared straight ahead, no longer returning the hug.
It felt like years since I had seen the valendi man, though it’s only been about a month. We had encountered him at the city hall when he had urged my family to leave. He had also been the one who told my family of the coming onslaught just under a year ago.
“Wait…” I whispered as the memory flashed before my eyes.
Her expression back then at the courthouse. There was guilt in her eyes as she stared at Varis and me.
“What do you mean?” I asked, knowing at the time, my parents and Isa had tried to conceal the information from us. “How much did you know?”
My mother sniffed. “As much as Lorizio told us,” she whispered. ‘Your father believed him, but… I didn’t. Not entirely it. I was such an idiot.” She swore. “I thought it was just doomsay, and after he backstabbed us years ago, I didn’t want to believe anything.”
I couldn’t help it. I could feel an anger brewing inside me. “You’re telling me we could’ve avoided all of this?” I asked my mother, and she nodded. It was my turn to feel conflicted. I wanted to be mad and shout and scream at her for being an idiot, but I held my tongue as a thought came to me. “But.. I thought we didn’t leave soon because the wagon father ordered it kept getting pushed back, and then it was stolen.”
My mother let off a pathetic laugh as she shook her head. “We didn’t need a wagon, Luna,” my mother sulked. “We could’ve packed what we needed and left on foot. We would’ve waited till spring and left during the wet season; it would’ve been rough, but it could be done. Your father suggested the wagon at the time because we needed one anyway, plus it would allow us to travel comfortably. Plus, Lorizio’s projection assumed we had plenty of time. However, when the first delay came around, your father suggested we walk or hitchhike…”
“But you said no?” I whispered, my fury returning. “Why?!”
“Because I didn’t want to believe!” My mother snapped, but I knew it wasn’t directed at me but herself. “The world hasn’t seen a conflict like this in millennia. I-I thought Lorizio was overreacting. Luna, your father, and I have seen the world. We’ve traveled far and even dabbled in politics. Nations are always posturing and making empty threats. This time, I thought it would’ve been that again… and I was wrong. I was arrogant; I let my emotions get the better of me…”
I let my arms fall loose around my sides and gripped my tiny fists. I was mad, yes. Though I, too, was naive as well. At the time, I also had hopes that everything would fizzle out, and I assumed it was both of my parents who were the reason why we stayed up until the last minute. Okay, not the last minute; no one expected the Rusivites to skip the frontlines and attack Oren directly. The point is, the whole reason we were in this was because of my mother’s stubbornness.
“If you didn’t believe Lorizio, why did you and Dad decide to send me off to a wizard school next year?” I asked as I pushed myself away from my mother.
“We did decide that,” she said with a sigh. “It was your father’s idea. Personally, I wanted to teach you myself, though as I said, he truly believed Lorizio. We tried to keep our arguments away from you kids. We never planned on living in Oren forever anyway, so I finally yielded to him. He was coming up with these ideas on the fly, and neither of us wanted to scare you kids. So we used that as an excuse.” She took a deep breath as I stood there wide-eyed. “Your father and Isa were scared–”
“Isa knew far beforehand too?!” I gasped, and my mother slowly nodded.
“Yes. She was far more eager to get going but understood that we didn’t want to scare you kids. I told her that Lorizio explained to us that we had over a year to prepare. Which is another reason why I wasn’t so hasty to leave. We wanted to come up with an excuse for why we had to leave, and so we decided that Rennford Academy would’ve been best…” Sighed. “But we’ve seen how that turned out.”
I couldn’t believe it. Before, I had thought everything had just been circumstantial. That we had just a nonstop turn of bad events. Except no, it was because of my stubborn and untrustworthy mother. When we returned from our camping trip, the soldiers marching outside our house proved to my mother that Lorizio was right. By that point, it was mostly too late. Of course, they expected we had at least another six months, but even then. We could’ve left far sooner…
It doesn’t matter; what’s done is done. Now isn’t the time to be having this talk. I told myself as I glanced back at the control room and saw Oscar and the Yankys stepping out of the room. “Momma,” I said, looking back at her. “Remind me in the future to never go gambling with you.”
The joke didn’t go over well with her, but it made me feel slightly better.
----------------------------------------
We had gathered the unconscious soldiers along with my aunt and laid them off to the side of the reactor room near the stairs to the control center. By this point, my adrenaline had faded completely, and I was exhausted. Every inch of my body was screaming for me to climb into a bed and die. I wanted my magic to return so badly so I could purge myself of all aches, but I couldn’t, as the magic within the pillar had yet to return.
Aside from how I physically felt. Mentally, I was still recovering from the brain-blasting realization that all of this bullshit we were going through was because my mother is awful when it comes to reading the room. My bonehead of a father also wasn’t off my hit list either. After all, he was an accomplice in my mother’s actions; if he had at least tried to smack some common sense into her, things would’ve probably been different.
But I had to tell myself what’s done is done. I can’t go back in time and call my mother stupid and fix the stupid mistakes she created. Also, if things hadn’t turned out as they did, I probably would’ve never met Oscar or Anne. Hell, the two of them would probably be dead.
Silver linings, Luna. Keep searching for the silver linings. That’s how I’ve always made it through life.
My mother knew I was pissed at her. Even though I hadn’t explicitly said anything to her to express that. My face said it all. Seeing her expression every time I glanced at her made being angry very difficult. She looked miserable, like a child who was denied cookies. It was awful, and I wanted to shout at her to stop being sad because it made me sad.
God, why can’t I be mad? I wanted to scream at her, but her puppy dog look was adorable, and I hated seeing her upset. Comparing my mother to a puppy is probably something I shouldn’t do. The point is that she’s a very hard person to be mad at. It’s moments like this I wish I could just shut off the part of me that’s so empathetic.
After we had moved the unconscious folk into a relatively safe location, I spent much of the brief downtime sitting on the steps outside the control room. It’s been roughly ten or twenty minutes since the ather-pulse-thingy dispelled all the magic in the city. How could that happen, though? I thought to myself, partly hoping the Master would chime in, but as expected, he said nothing. God, I hope he comes back soon.
“Are you well?” Oscar’s voice startled me, and I jerked where I sat and glanced up at the older elf. He smiled sheepishly at me and gestured towards me with open hands as if presenting something. “You look… bad for someone who… kicks ass as the kids say?” He said with an uplift that sounded more like a question.
Hearing the man’s disjointed Maurich made me snort. “I should feel that way, yes.” I nodded. “But, that wasn’t me doing all the flying around.” I twirled my finger.
“Man in head?” Oscar asked as he tapped his forehead. “Mystery voice?”
For some reason, I’d forgotten Oscar was aware of the Master, or at least the voice in my head that warned us whenever the Rusivite machines were coming. Also, I should’ve known that he and Isa spoke a lot during our travels, mainly in Yanky, as that was Oscar’s native language, so I never knew what they were talking about unless I asked.
Hearing he was partially aware, my shoulders, which I hadn’t noticed, were tense and relaxed, and I nodded. “Yeah, after we parted ways at the refugee camp and went on that stupid but successful,” I hastily added, “rescue mission. The… Master took control of me to save us all.”
“He–uh–it?”
“He,” I said, and Oscar nodded.
“He can do that?” He asked, and once again, I bobbed my head slowly.
“Yes, but… He said it takes a lot of power for him to do so. Afterward, he only appeared briefly to tell us to find the heart.” I pointed towards the floor. “Of the city. Which is apparently here. A place of power, he called it.” Oscar nodded but said nothing, so I continued, “I dunno if this is some sort of…” I wanted to say antenna but couldn’t think of a word that wasn’t English and snapped my fingers, “A receptor of sorts. A place we can communicate while he recharged.”
That’s when Oscar’s eyes widened and floored me as he snapped his fingers and said, “Like a radio antenna!” He didn’t actually say radio antenna; he really said some crazy Yanky words I would butcher if I tried to repeat them, but when he jankily explained it, that’s what it roughly translated into once I understood.
“Back home,” Oscar explained, “we study new methods of communication outside of magic.” This caused my eyebrow to arch, and he smirked. “Magic thought infallible.” He shook his head. “No true. Magic, easily fallible when other casters involved. So, Yankys work on new device called radio.” He held a finger to his lips. “It is secret. You heard not from me.”
I nodded and mimicked, zipping my lips. Honestly, I was fascinated by what he was telling me. Enora’s time scale is not exactly the same as Earth's. I’m no astronomer, but the planet's revolution around the Sun was slightly longer than Earth's, give or take a month. Again, I’m no expert, and I don’t have a calendar at the moment to double-check. What I’m getting at is that if the years were comparable to what I knew of Earth's history, knowing that just now radios were being invented after all the crazy shit I’ve seen was whacky.
As an ignorant adult, or, uh, kid? Anyway, I’m not smart. Everyone thinks I am, but that’s because they’re ignorant of where my true strength lies. Yes, I’m saying idiocy can be a strength! Anyway, I’m getting sidetracked.
I always pictured civilization growing up as a game of Sid Meir’s Civilization. Everyone starts in the Stone Age, and slowly, you progress down the technology tree along with everyone else. Yeah, no. My belief in that system was stupidly wrong. Many historians would probably also agree and call me a dummy, but I say nothing to them because they’re right.
Enora looked at such a system, and if history is to be believed, she looked to Papa Merlin, the God of Magic and Knowledge, and simply asked for the cool tech to be given to them right away, like some spoiled teenage girl asking her wealthy parents for the most expensive car at a dealership. Of course, that’s not exactly what happened; the Dark Lord was trying to take over the world, and Merlin threw the natives a bone, but again, that’s if history is to be believed.
If only the God of Earth, if there was one, did that instead of leaving us to ourselves.
Why am I going on and on about how fascinating it is to see another world develop? Because I’m scared, frustrated, and trying to distract myself. Oscar coming to talk to me has been a fantastic distraction thus far.
“What were we talking about?” I asked, responding to Oscar’s suggestion. I heard nothing.
Oscar smirked. “Exactly.” He giggled and took a seat on the stairs beside me. “Tell me. What is really bothering you?” He asked in a shockingly coherent sentence; I guess that’s something he had to ask Anne a lot.
“A lot of things,” I mumbled.
“Would talking make you feel better?” He asked.
It’s better than being stuck alone with my thoughts. I wanted to say that but opted for “I think so.” I took a deep breath and said nothing. Not because I had nothing to discuss but because I had no idea where to start.
Of course, I had no intention of telling Oscar the whole truth; he, or anyone for that matter, had no reason to know I was actually some thirty-four-year-old schmuck stuck in the body of a seven-year-old girl. Well, technically, I’d be twenty-seven because that’s when the old me got killed, though I guess my time as Luna would mentally put me at thirty-four. If I’m being really honest, though, mentally, I’m more like seventeen or eighteen because I feel no different from when I graduated, but uh-shit, I’m avoiding the topic.
What I’m trying to say is that back then, it meant nothing. If people knew I was reincarnated, it'd serve them nothing. Sure, where I came from, there was a lot of technology that could help Heinmarr and the Alliance beat the Rusivites, right? No. I worked in IT tech support at the first level. I helped people unfreeze their Outlook emails and recover lost documents. If you want to get more specific, it was a law firm’s tech support, in which I learned a little bit about US law. Whoopie-fucking-doo. I wasn’t some army engineer or some dude who worked at Lockheed Martin. I know nothing. I never went to college or anything. I have nothing to give to these people aside from stories. Sure, I can tell people humanity got to the moon using tin cans and highly dangerous chemical rockets, but I certainly couldn’t tell them how.
I am no one special, and that’s what annoys the shit out of me. I’m grateful that the Master brought me back; I’m happy that, in a sense, I am still alive, but why? Why me? Why not have some super strong SAS or Navy Seal special forces operators? Or, I dunno, some super-intelligent engineer guy who could share their knowledge with the natives. Indeed, that’s the impression I’m getting from the Rusivites. Either those guys had a huge scientific breakthrough, or they’re gaining knowledge from someone or something.
So why me? What makes me unique?
“It’s about who you were.” The memory of the Master’s voice rang in my mind.
Who I was? If that’s the case, the one who came before Luna was no one special. They were nothing but a fat, lazy, and severely insecure man who spent years hiding in their room. Nothing they did was remarkable.
Fuck I got sidetracked.
As I came to my senses, I noticed Oscar was still patiently waiting. For a man who had to watch over his niece, he was probably used to things like this. I took in some air and sighed.
“I feel like things are going to get worse,” I said softly. “That this is only the tip of what’s to come. Lucien told us that Putinov wasn’t a Rusivite collaborator, that he was working with the Church—I mean, cult. The Master…” I tapped my forehead. “Confirmed this; he told me that these people. These religious nut jobs want to bring their god to this world and end everything.”
Oscar kept his face straight, but I could see in his eyes he was deeply disturbed by what I had just said.
I went on, “I feel like no matter what we do. It’s going to stink. I don’t want this. I never asked for it…” I trailed off momentarily and whispered, “None of us asked for this. The Master said he needed me.” I tapped my chest. “That I need to help him save the world or some cliche bullcrap. That I was some special chosen one, which of fucking course!” I swore Oscar’s eyes widened, but he said nothing as he left me to vent.
“Of course, it’s a chosen one plot. Just like in the stories, I get picked as the one to save the world, usually, in such stories the main characters are happy, or their egos balloon—no! I don’t want that. I don’t want to be a hero; I don’t want to be burdened with that. I’m seven, goddammit. You don’t just walk up to a child and drop something like that on them. He manipulated me. Twisted my thoughts and memories and forced me to march into a woods where I was nearly eaten alive by monsters, after that he told me I was a hero, and then—" I snapped my fingers "—wiped my memory like that. Made me forget so I wouldn’t tell anyone. He did that multiple times. Then the Rusivites invaded, and the happy life I was enjoying was just snatched away. I then got blown up, and suddenly I have a new voice in my head, one that I hadn’t told you about.”
I was on a roll. “This super pretty looking lady with multicolored eyes came to me and started to talk about her “Father” and how we weren’t supposed to meet yet; here I was before her. She told me not to trust the Master guy because he wants to manipulate me, which, no shit I knew that. So I asked her what she and her Father want, and she told me they want to end all death and suffering, and that Father wants to reclaim what was his or some bullshit. She sugarcoated it so much it became fucking sour. I did not trust her, nor do I want to trust her. There’s a difference between an asshole and someone trying to hide the fact they’re an asshole.” I looked at Oscar, whose eyes were wide and his mouth slightly agape.
I went on anyway, “The first one. You know what you’re getting. The guy is a shady dick, but he’s been upfront about it and is pretty helpful. The second one promises to help but is secretly hiding the shady shit they’re doing. The rest of it, you sort of know, you were there for it. Fast forward to now.” I turned my gaze out towards the room.
I could see my mother checking on the unconscious while the three Yanky soldiers kept watch near the entrance. I took one big breath and sighed heavily, “Now there’s a third voice.” I reached into my pocket and took out the caster Oscar had given me. Surprisingly, despite all the tumbles I went through, the thing was still intact.
Oscar blinked slowly and took a breath of his own. “Ben has spoken to you too?”
I glanced at him. “Who?”
“The…” He thought of the words. “Asshole in Caster? Did they guide you here?”
I snorted and nodded. “They were a jerk, alright,” I said, censoring myself this time. Yes, they were the ones who led us here, though they told us to call them “Ami.”
“Ami?” He blinked. “Sounds Naponi.”
I shook my head. “It’s French.”
“Huh?” Oscar blinked, and I mentally scolded myself.
“It’s a language that Ami and Lucien speak,” I somewhat lied. Part of it was genuine. I didn’t know if Ami was some French guy like Lucien or… No. No. That… it couldn’t be.
“Oscar,” I said slowly as I turned to look at him. “When you went to set off the reactor, did… Ami guide you through the process when Lucien joined you?”
Oscar thought about it for a second, then his eyes narrowed, and in Yanky, he said something that sounded very much like a curse word. “You think,” he said, coming to the same conclusion as me. "Ben, is that Lucien person?”
For a moment, I allowed myself to smirk, and I nodded. “I think so… It makes sense.”
“How so?” he asked.
“I met Lucien and Putinov the day before when they came to my aunt’s home. Not even a day later, I’m suddenly getting messages from them, and so are you.”
“The day after I gave you the caster yes.” Oscar nodded.
“That’s also when the archbishop enacted their plan to blow up this reactor.” I gripped my chin in thought as, this time, I was on a different kind of roll. “I doubt Putinov knew the Rusivites were going to attack; he also noted that he had been searching for something, and he said I was an anomaly. The only one with Putinov was Lucien, which the archbishop said was his scribe.”
Oscar’s smile widened, and his eyes twinkled. “Message.”
I blinked. “Pardon?”
“The spell. Message…” Oscar cleared his throat. “Mrs. Ashflow!” He startled me when he called for my mother. “Please, come.” He motioned.
“Wh-what are you doing?!” I hissed, still not in the mood to speak to her.
“On the topic of magic.” Oscar smirked. “I think it’s best we call an expert.”