Cale stretched as he passed under the Magistrat building and headed for the entrance. He had been talking with the Eldest for quite a while, telling him in great detail what had happened over the days. At first, the Eldest had been a little surprised that the dragon from the vision had been a god, but after Cale's execution, he began to be able to comprehend what was going on.

Cale was in a time loop, probably caused by the god of the future - Mellontikos. The absence of the three gods, Cale's Igrikum and RM, the unchanged vision... it all indicated that he was spinning in an endless spiral with an uncertain end. A life from which he could not escape.

But some questions still remained unanswered: why had he seen Mellontikos if he didn't exist in this world?

The Eldest therefore insisted that there had to be a way out of this hole. He was sure, despite the circumstantial evidence, that the world still had a connection to the first timeline. He could not say how many times Cale would be reborn before he could break free of this cycle, but he knew it was possible. Which was the absolute horror for Cale.

For a moment, Cale stopped in the wide courtyard and looked toward the city. The conversation with the Eldest had an unpleasant aftertaste. It was quite possible that Cale would have to live the same life quite a few more times, to no avail. Just the thought of it drove Cale crazy. He could try as many times as he wanted to protect people, but in the end it was useless. As soon as Cale would leave this world, it would dissolve. All the relationships he had with the humans would no longer exist. Cale disappeared from their memories and he himself was punished by being the only one who could remember. Even the last few hours, Cale could not help but adopt a depressed attitude.

The fact that he had met Sefra on the way back to the apartment did not make it any better. Sefra was, after Aletta, the first real magic teacher Cale had ever had, but the woman currently didn't know at all what value she had for Cale. Even though he always tried to convince himself to befriend Sefra because of her abilities, he could not quench the desire inside him.

The desire to drop his facade and tell the truth. The desire to seek recognition. The desire... to make people understand how much they meant to him.

But every time Cale thought about it, he forced himself not to burst into tears. He forced himself to remain calm, even though he certainly wasn't. He constantly reminded himself not to get too close to people, because in his heart he had already almost concluded that his 6th life would not be his last. Although he saw a glimmer of hope thanks to the dragons, since the conversation with the Eldest, his sky was black again. Cale tried to see the good things, but couldn't.

And as if fate had noticed his thoughts, he noticed two familiar sources of mana. Two people who meant a lot to him, but whose presence drove him crazy at the same time. The two people he would currently count among his closest friends.

Grischa Vonstetten and William von Sylve.

He could feel the two of them walking through the Magistrat and glanced at the door the two were heading for. His discovery proved true shortly thereafter. Without any consideration, Grischa slammed the door open, taking only a fraction of a second to spot Cale, and with a great leap, Grischa nearly yanked the mage to the ground.

Visibly surprised, Cale pressed his body against it while Grischa hugged him tightly, almost strangling him in the process, before Cale heard the whimper in his voice and felt a tear run down Grischa's face. Perplexed, Cale stopped and let his gaze wander to William, who also came sprinting towards him. It was as if the prince lost all inhibitions at their eye contact, for he too suddenly began to cry.

Cale's soul broke when he saw Grischa and William like this. The feelings that had been crushing him for years came up. Joy, relief, sadness, sorrow, regret, fear and.... loneliness.

With open arms, he also welcomed William, who wrapped his hands around Cale's torso and pressed his head against his chest before Cale gave in and was pulled to his knees.

Silently, he held the two quietly sobbing men in his arms while he made a small, milky, soundproof barrier appear around them and smiled. The people were the reason he didn't just start committing endless suicide, not to mention how barbaric the thought seemed to him.

"You bastard. I'm going to kill you. Why do you just disappear again!", Grischa scolded in his tearful voice as he pushed himself away from Cale and looked at him seriously with his green eyes. William completely ignored the exclamation and continued to unobtrusively cling to Cale while Cale also hugged him with his right hand. Wordlessly, Cale returned his gaze. He just didn't know what to say. He never knew when he had to explain himself. Sometimes it was almost as if a stranger was controlling his body and Cale was just a spectator.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

"Say something", Grischa commanded, shaking Cale briefly, which merely caused Cale to wrap his hand around him and squeeze. Grischa bristled, scolding Cale loudly and crying, while William sat almost silently nearby, just enjoying the moment of finally seeing him again.

Was it the people? Was it the hope? Was it the fear of infinity? What was it that made Cale get up every day? How long could he keep this whole situation going before it broke him? Before he all had to accept that there was no future for him?

"If you're going to yell at me like that, I'm going to leave", Cale raised his voice softly, causing Grischa to tighten his grip and William to look up at the same time.

"Don't you dare!", the 1st seat gave almost puny voice, while Cale turned his attention to William.

"It's good to have you back in town", he declared, while relief was reflected on the young man's face, distancing himself from Cale a bit before reaching for his right hand and holding it with both hands.

"I really missed you, Cale", William admitted maturely, keeping his tears at bay, Grischa would continue to hang around his neck.

"I missed you, too. You wouldn't believe how much", Cale confessed. It was a truth that pained Cale. It made him so happy to see William and to be able to talk to him, but at the same time he recalled all the versions of William he had been privileged to know over the centuries. Personalities he had never forgotten, nor could he.

"That's not fair", Grischa interjected. "You never miss me."

"I just saw you a little while ago, Grin", Cale replied, but the High-Magician made no move to separate himself from Cale, so Cale sighed and looked at William. "How are you? How was Winstest?"

"If you'd been here, you'd know", William gave challengingly, as if judging Cale. This was a completely unexpected reaction for Cale, so he looked at the prince silently for a few moments.

"I was just gone for a few days doing some stuff", Cale tried to defend himself, but the sticky monkey abruptly nullified that.

"Liar, you said you made some new friends."

"I didn't say it like that, you're twisting the facts", Cale threw back.

"So? Then please explain to me why you ran away AGAIN?"

"I didn't run awa..."

Cale fell silent. Actually, he had escaped, yes. He couldn't stand to see Grischa suffer when he was the source. Whereby, he had admitted in the meantime that he also did it to protect himself. That night, he just couldn't handle all the pressure on him.

Which is why he spontaneously went after one of the most dangerous situations that he otherwise wouldn't have done with a clear mind. Which he would have had to do sooner or later anyway.

"You ran away. Like a coward and that, although you promised to talk to me. Then why don't you? Why are you leaving me out again!"

"Grischa...", Cale cautiously raised his voice, loosening his grip, which the mage sensed and straightened up again. "... I'm responsible for what happened to you."

"Bullshit", the High-Magician shot back rebelliously. "I know you think it's your fault. And I'm telling you it's bullshit. The Kormandent's attack wasn't your fault and you aren't responsible for my heading either!"

"It's... my fault, Grischa."

"Why do you always blame yourself?", William interjected. "That's the same thing you said to me back then, when I got a fever. Remember? Why do you keep assuming that all the things that happen around us are your fault? That's insane."

"It's... complicated", Cale replied before avoiding William's gaze.

"Then tell us!", Grischa shouted energetically, which is why Cale also got loud.

"I told you! Everything! From BEGINNING TO END, Grischa!", Cale shouted back. "The whole, DAMN story. And look what it did to you!"

Surprised, William and Grischa fell silent before Cale realized what he had just said and looked jerkily to the side. His heart was racing madly, but he... he couldn't. He couldn't stand to pretend anymore that he was okay. Like he was somehow in control of the situation. As if he knew exactly what to do.

When Grischa held his head with his hand a moment later, Cale immediately got tears in his eyes and looked at him with a desperate look.

"See, it's happening again. I'll make you sick."

"Don't you dare", Grischa retorted, letting go of his head and wrapping both hands around Cale before resting his head on Cale's shoulder. "Stop saying things like that and stop having to answer for everything all the time. I'm begging you."

"I can't help it, Grin. I just can't do this..."

"Don't just decide this without me!", Grischa interrupted instantly. "I'm not going to go. Not today, and not tomorrow. Never! You can't just decide what you think is best and completely ignore my opinion!"

"I can't. I'll drag you all down to ruin, and in the end I'll be..." replied Cale desperately, but couldn't bring himself to speak his thoughts aloud. <... alone again.>

"If it means I can stay with you."

Tears streamed down Cale's face, so he loosened his hands and held his face with both palms, as if trying to stem the tide. He had no strength to do so. How could he reject Grischa when he himself was not even able to draw a mental line? Why was he always trying to dismiss people as minor figures in his life, when he never managed to actually do it?

"Please stop. It's hard enough with Will... you're just making it worse. How many times am I supposed to watch the people I care about die?", Cale replied with a crying voice as Grischa sat up.

"Oh, no. No. No. You can't make that excuse again. Your age has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you're acting like an asshole. So cut the crap already and talk to us!"

Surprised, Cale paused. A tremendous sense of déjà vu came over Cale, which is why he instantly stopped crying and lowered his hands. He looked stunned at Grischa, who seemed equally surprised at his own statement. For a moment, what was completely silent before Grischa grabbed his face and looked at Cale.

"What?", William spoke up.