i skidded to a halt in front of the house, my breaths heavy. i could almost hear the police sirens in my head, the noise growing louder and louder as their tires zoomed on the road.

what have I done? it was a needle, yes, but the fact... the fact I had done it makes the situation so much worse than it should be. I could lose my job. and though the tiny slice of metal had only drawn a teensy bit of blood, it was enough blood to make my peers aware.

awareness. yes, that's what they had. grim, but dangerously thoughtful awareness.

i slammed open my door and looked into the house.

the lights were low, but you could still see inside.

baby toys lined the walls, along with diapers ( a few used) bottles, and a white fence that looked like we were keeping a very small juvenile in.

maybe we were....

maybe we had created a monster. no... there was no maybe.

calm down. take your meds. go to bed. read a book. do something else.

i didn't know who's this voice was, or why it seemed to emanate from my mind, but I obeyed, going to the kitchen and grabbing a purple pill bottle, with a thick black label.

ah yes. a black label. a pill so great that it would cure any illness, well, maybe. that is if you followed everything in the right order, with the right steps. however, if you even thought of taking one pill to many...

well, it wasn't going to be pretty.

i should know...

i took off the cap and swallowed a square-shaped sort of roundish type pill, that was a yellow color. you could easily mistake it for a small piece of juicy fruit gum. instantly, my muscles relaxed. I must have not taken one of them in the morning....

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

i need to explain this to my boss... before he's not my boss any more.

"honey? what are you doing home so early?"

I turned, and my beautiful darling stared at me, her brown long hair over her shoulder, her short nightgown swishing as she cradled a small babe on her chest.

"oh.... josy.... josy my low... i... I didn't take my meds.... an incident happened."

"hold on."

she went and put the baby in its crib before coming back and leading me to the sofa.

"tell me everything. I'm all ears."

"thankyou dearest... i... I appreciate it."

I told her everything.

i didn't stop, even when she lifted a hand to her mouth when I told of the needle being plunged into the flesh of a complete stranger, and then walked out from an incomplete surgery.

"I'll talk to my boss tomorrow... but until then...i need rest."

she nodded. i noticed.... a little look she gave. as if she never even wanted dot look at me at all. as if.... no. I'm still just reacting to not having my meds.

"here. i got something for you. the doctor said not to give it quite yet, but with this... I'm sure you need it."

...

she pulled out an orange pill bottle filled with many colors, like a deadly rainbow that somehow helped the loss of happiness.

"oh. wouldn't he call me if I got a new med-"

"no. you were busy. so he contacted me instead. you should take them now."

" why... i just took my others..."

"I just think we should try one out. see if it helps you relax, you know?"

she popped off the lid and handed me a maroon-colored pill.

no.. keep your sanity. don't take it.

...

i grabbed the pill and swallowed, the outer coating sliding down my throat like a jellybean, but tasting like chemicals all the same.

...

nothing.

"thankyou. I'll...see to it that I get to rest now."

I needed to leave the room.

not because of the baby now crying. or the fact I was beginning to grow tired. it was because of her intense stare, that kind of scared me. her pupils were small, and not dilated, but they still looked straight through my existence...

no.

i just needed a good.....hour......of......

i stood in the doorway, with the faint sound of thunder, lightning, and sickening sickening rain. i gripped the wood tightly, to the point I thought I t was going to break.

.... fuck......

and then my head hit the floor.

just like that.

that's when my normal life had stopped and morphed into hell.

i sometimes question, maybe I died, and I had gone to hell right then and there.

but then again.... some people say the earth is hell.