Angelica was returning to the laboratory after walking Bella around the quad. She hummed pleasantly to herself, thinking with pleasure of the forms she would be filling out, correspondence she would be replying to, and documents she would be collating that morning. Just another perfect day in earthly paradise!

She stopped in surprise when she saw an official looking angel in dark robes and a white judicial wig standing outside the doors of the laboratory.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"Is this Master Jabber's laboratory?" the she-angel said.

"Yes, and you are?"

"I'm from the Commission on Celestial Relations. I'm Commissioner Gorgon." She extended her hand.

"That's an interesting last name," Angelica said, returning her shake.

"Yes, it's my husband's. He's French."

"Ah!" Angelica said, not knowing what she meant.

"But that's neither here nor there. Do you work for Master Jabber? Is he in?"

"Yes, I'm his secretary. May I ask what this is concerning?"

"We received a complaint from an angel recently saying Master Jabber had accosted her and grabbed her wings."

"Oh my God!" Angelica held her hands to her mouth.

"Yes, apparently your boss had been ogling her all night and finally cornered her before grabbing a fistful of her feathers!"

Angelica felt her legs go weak. Bella nuzzled up against her, a low-pitched murmur vibrating from her throat. "You know, he did a similar thing to me!"

Commissioner Gordan gave Angelica a sharp look. "Dear Lord, so this wasn't an isolated incident."

"No," Angelica said, her voice shaking slightly. "I've worked for him for almost a year and nothing untoward ever happened. But then I got this halo."

"It's rather beautiful work," Commissioner Gorgon said. "Italian?"

Angelica also didn't know what that meant, but nodded absently. "Thank you, yes it's very special to me . . . but Master Jabber was obsessed, he kept asking me why I wore it, as if he, he was trying to say halos should only be worn by angels." Angelica's voice broke as she tried to hold back her tears.

Commissioner Gorgon tsked in displeasure. She placed a hand on the demoness's shoulder. "It's okay, let it out, tell me everything."

Angelica nodded. "I'm fine. It's okay. But then he started making fun of demon horns and he–" She stopped and shook her head.

"Yes?" Commissioner Gorgon was hanging on her every word. "Go ahead."

"It's embarrassing."

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

"He's the one who should be ashamed of himself. You have nothing to be embarrassed of."

"Well," Angelica murmured, "he leaned in and kind of sniffed me, like he was taking a twisted enjoyment out of being near me now that I had a halo but when I told him to stop, he pretended he was only trying to use my halo's light to read a . . . a . . . letter." Angelica covered her face suddenly and let the tears flow with her sobs. A few trickled down her chin and fell to the pavement with a hiss.

Commissioner Gorgon patted her gently. "It's okay. You're okay. Let it out. You're safe now."

"It's just," Angelica looked up, drying the corner of her eyes with her thumb, "it's just, you know, his excuse, somehow made it worse . . . But maybe it's my fault. Maybe I'm being too sensitive about this. Maybe it was all just a big misunderstanding."

"Angelica, look at me," Commissioner Gorgon said, looking into her eyes. "It's not your fault. No one has a right to use your halo as if it's some kind of halogen lamp. There's no excuse for Master Jabber's behavior. That's exactly why I came here."

"You're going to arrest him?"

"No, no," Commissioner Gorgon waved her hand. "Not yet anyway. The angel who made the complaint appears to have already smote him well and truly, and she thinks that was punishment enough. I had come here to give him an official warning but hearing your story now, it sounds like he has some kind of angel fetish. It might be worth bringing him before the Commission anyways."

Angelica took a deep breath and then said more calmly. "Well if you need me to testify or whatnot, I'm more than willing to help."

"I appreciate your bravery. I know this can't be easy," the Commissioner said. "Let me speak with him and see what he has to say for himself. Then we'll decide on what measures to take."

"Of course." Angelica opened the wooden door to Jabber's laboratory. It gave a slow creak. "He's in his office. If you'll just follow me."

***

As Jabber continued his rant about the benefits of his GOAT helmet, he began to get into character, imitating Tatius' absurdly high monotone voice.

All at once he stood from his chair, shook his fists in the air and exclaimed, "When you're an angel whatever you do is good by definition, so you can do whatever you want! Even grab those demons by the horn!"

It was at that moment that Angelica and Commissioner Gorgon entered Jabber's office.

"What did you just say?" Angelica exclaimed in shock, her hands coming to her mouth. "And why are you dressed like that?! You're a GOAT?!"

"No, no!" Jabber said, his eyes wide in surprise and embarrassment. "It's your hellhound, she was chewing on my wand! Made my clothes explode into this!"

"What does Bella have to do with you cosplaying as a dark angel?" Angelica's voice shook with fury. "Did she make you wear that GOAT helmet too?"

"No, the helmet is, uh, in fact, mine," Jabber admitted with a stammer. "But the rest of this is Bella's fault!"

All at once Angelica noticed Fokso sitting on the couch and took a step back. "Oh my Missing Lord! You and Tatius are friends? You let that monster in here?!"

"No!" Jabber stammered. "No, that's not Tatius! He doesn't even have wings."

"No, no, no!!" Angelica held her hands up as though trying to physically push away what she was seeing. "I refuse to work here any longer!" She turned to Commissioner Gorgon. "I want to file a complaint!"

"Of course," the commissioner said, putting her arms over Angelica's shoulders to comfort her. "I've seen more than enough. Let's go." As she led the she-demon away, she called back to Jabber, "This is shocking behavior. Disturbing in the extreme. You'll be hearing from the Commission!"

"The Commission?!" Jabber exclaimed. "But this is all that hellhound's doing. I don't normally dress like this."

"You should be ashamed of yourself!" the commissioner said as she slammed the office door shut behind them.

Jabber sat heavily back in his chair, his mouth open as he stared at the closed door.

Fokso studied him a moment before saying, "So do you have anything good to eat around here?"

"I don't know," Jabber replied, rubbing his forehead distractedly. His voice was low and deflated. "There might be some cereal or something."

"What the hell is cereal?