In an instant, Midnight disappeared right before my eyes. I fell into the darkness below soon after. The world around me shattered into a million pieces as the flames that surrounded my body slowly consumed me. It was not long before I disappeared as well.

Warmth grew within me while my body disintegrated into orbs, suddenly shoving me into the light. The moment my eyes flew open, I found myself surrounded by purple flames. I could not fill my lungs with enough air. Someone held me close to them.

Instantly, I knew it was Alijah. I tried to shove him away, not knowing if the fire was searing him, but instead of letting me go. His grip tightened. Luckily, his body seemed unaffected by the flames that surrounded us.

However, my wolf's orbs were glowing brightly, the same as his body. Though noticing my movements, he slowly loosened his grip enough to allow me to pull away. A weird sensation built within me, along with the same sharp pain from before I blacked out.

"Rem?" Alijah called out to me; voice devoid of emotions.

I gazed up to meet with his face, only to see him with an expression I thought he would never give me again. His cold eyes, emotionless face made me realize he did not know if he was facing Midnight or me. It was heartbreaking.

However, the moment my expression shifted, he grabbed the back of my head before engulfing me in a kiss that stole every ounce of my being. Tears dripped from my eyes, allowing me to sink into it too. I thought he would be strong if I had not come back from my encounter with Midnight.

He usually always placed a strong front. But the way his hands trembled made me realize the whole thing had terrified him.

Why... did I not notice that he had been hurting this much?

I wanted to tell my wolf that Midnight never intended to take me, but he would not let go of me. The only thing that separated us was me flinching in pain when my abdomen hurt once again. The moment he noticed I was in discomfort, he pulled me into his chest.

There, he tried to do something that my father had once done to him. Closing his eyes, he kissed my forehead. His tail curled around me protectively before suddenly feeling at ease from the pain that was stabbing me earlier. My father had done this technique once before to me, too.

Back when I broke a bone when I was out training with my brothers. I was only nine then, of course, I was robust as always. That ended with me rolling off a hill I had not seen. I thought Alijah did not know how to share the pain with others, but he did so with ease now that the moon was up in the sky.

The celestial body was responding to his emotions to protect me. It seemed Fenrir's blessing was still present in the moon, even though his body was a husk back in the celestial plains. The pain itself was one I had never felt before. Though, what was worrisome was the fact that I could smell the blood that was coming from there.

Did my period decide to start in this mess?

My groin felt drenched, almost as if I had wet myself. To be honest, I had never had it this bad. I remember Vera complaining about having to use many pads, but my periods used to be only a few drops before they stopped completely.

Midnight… she…

The moment the thought left my mind, I remembered what the blood moon had done to Alijah's and my father's reproductive systems. They had both been born sterile, yet became viable during the celestial plains. I never had extensive testing done to figure out what was wrong with me.

After all, the doctors thought it was because I was a hybrid. Yet it seemed there was more than that. My brothers never were experimented on like Dad was when he was a child. This was something he refused to do.

So, this left me with only one conclusion to make. The red moon was also activating something within us. Or maybe just me? Either way, I remembered Vera complaining about her cycle.

Fuck! I’m sorry, sis. I didn’t know.

All this time, I thought she was just being a baby about it. I had to apologize for making fun of her back then. This was bothersome. Alijah held me close to him, attempting to ease my pain. Though the moon itself was affecting him in ways, I did not comprehend.

His breathing was heavy and shallow. It was almost as if he had a hard time finding air. He had done nothing that would have exerted him. Though, I could not worry much about my wolf. My body had other issues caused by the moon itself, too.

If it was anything like what he was feeling then, I wondered how he had stayed in control all this time. I felt like I was going to burn alive because of how hot the birthmark felt. It also shined through my shirt, making me wonder just what it was doing to me.

If I was feeling this, then Alijah must have been feeling it tenth fold. He was a full-fledged Lycan. However, something that worried me more was the curse that had plagued me all my life. It usually went rampant whenever I came back from death, but this time... I saw no darkness come from me.

I did not know if the moon purified me, or if Midnight herself did so. But that was also doubtful. She told me I would have to learn to live with it. And that was not a lie. It had been unlinked from Edna. It could only mean one thing…

Did something happen that Midna didn’t see? If it’s that, then what’s going on? Or did she know?

Howls erupted around us, triggering Alijah to go on the defensive, holding me tighter to his body. A small growl left his lips, feeling threatened by them. All I could do was hang onto him, hoping he would not lose control. My wolf’s eyes resembled one of a wild beast.

It made me wonder if I should have called out to him, but it probably would have made him snap. I could tell by how tight he was holding me he would not let me go, either. However, even in that state, I felt at ease in the arms of my husband.

I knew that if he sunk his fangs into anything, it would be an intruder. So, I held my breath for a bit before releasing a sigh in the hopes he would not snap at me at least.

"Alijah... you’re smothering me a bit." I whimpered.

He loosened his grip on me a bit, but he would not let me go. Thankfully, we were alone in this barrier, leaving the others safe from him. After all, he wanted to stay with me. Instead of leaving me like that or snapping at me, he pushed me onto the ground.

His breathing became even shallower, eyes were full of desire. A longing I could not quench this time. Not with what was happening to me down there.

"Rem... I want to..." Alijah licked his lips, sizing me up.

I knew exactly what he wanted from the expression in his eyes. However, it did not matter how much he wanted me. It would be impossible to do if the pain and sensation I was feeling were because of my cycle.

"I can't," I mumbled, not feeling well.

He sighed, biting onto his lip hard enough to draw blood. It dripped down his chin and onto my cheek. He used the pain to snap himself out before he helped me sit, hugging me once again. It was tender.

"I know... I can smell it. Though... It doesn’t stop me from wanting to use your other..." Alijah huffed.

I stopped him immediately by placing my hands on his mouth.

No way... Nu-uh...

That was not for me. Although... we probably did before...

"Impossible!" I growled, feeling defensive because of what he was suggesting.

My reaction caused him to chuckle, smiling a bit. Although he was still bothered by the whole thing. Not because I denied him, but because he was having a hard time controlling himself. The effects of the blood moon were undeniable.

Mom and Dad had a similar issue, though in this case, I could not help him. It made me wonder how Dad and my brothers were handling it. Aiden’s desire to have Sophie must have been overwhelming too.

Same as Dad’s for mom…

"I know. I would do nothing to hurt you, my love. Though the beast in me still wants to devour you. So... let me hold you like this until the moon passes at least." Alijah whispered, sounding somewhat in pain because of it.

It probably hurt to hold it back. Yet, why was I not feeling like this?

"Did you do that during your last red moon?" I mumbled, not happy with the thought.

Though Alijah quickly stopped me in my tracks when he shook his head, scowling at me.

"No... I kind of murdered everyone instead." A soft growl came from my wolf's lips before continuing.

"But with you. I... can't seem to stop myself from wanting to be buried within you." He confessed, shuddering a bit at my every movement.

Even though down there was a no... I could help him with something, at least. All this time, he had been trying to ease my pain. This was the least I could do to help him with his itch. With one swift movement, I slipped from his grip, allowing myself to slide down towards his crouch.

He seemed to be surprised because of my sudden approach. Even trembled a bit.

"Rem?" Alijah called out.

I undid his pants. Everything that needed to be said had to wait until after the moon. My wolf was a ticking time bomb. If it was not for sex, his urges would go to more murderous desires. And the last thing I needed was for him to lose control.

Especially now that I was a full, fragile mortal. If he accidentally lost it for a moment and hurt me, that could be it for everyone.

"I can't help you like you want to, but I can do this at least." I pulled Alijah's heat out, causing him to gasp the moment my fingers touched it.

It was hot and stiff like every time we ever did things like this. Though this time he seemed extra sensitive. Probably the moon... During full moons, he usually was rougher and sometimes even shifted into his half beast half humanoid form.

Though that started after he had done it during our first night together after he saved me. I guess his emotions while holding me were not fully in control.

"Rem, don't... I think I’ll lose it for real." Alijah tried to warn me.

I smirked because of it before kissing his member, leaving him to shiver because of it. The flames had died down by the time I licked him. He chuckled nervously before grabbing my hair somewhat firmly. It did not hurt, though.

"Be a good boy and let me pleasure you at least." I lapped his heat.

“Oh, fuck.” He panted, holding my hair.

When I sucked it into my mouth, he moaned my name loudly before crouching a bit, digging his other hand into the ground. His voice sounded so clear. His lips were slightly above my head, tail tensed up each time I stroked him. It rested on my back as my tail remained between my legs.

Even though he had been reluctant when we started, in a couple of moments, he could not stop himself from making sweet noises to entice me further.

"Rem, I love you," Alijah murmured repeatedly.

I tried to concentrate on what I was doing, but I could not stop myself from wanting to peek at him, wondering what expression he had. It was distracting enough to take away from the burning sensation in my chest. Pants and moans left his mouth when I pressed my tongue on his sensitive tip.

I did not realize how this would feel like torture for me. Hearing him like that while I could not make love to him myself made me feel frustrated. It made me want to dominate him, but I could not. Even so, his sweet voice in my ears allured me to ignore my predicament.

I wanted nothing else but to take him into me. A thought that would never be met. My rationale was stronger than that desire. I did not want to mess with anything down there. Especially since I did not know half of what was going on.

Saliva dripped from my mouth onto his heat. Not that he minded. A salty taste alerted me my wolf was close, but I could not tell. That was when he suddenly shoved my head down, pushing his heat deeper than it had ever gone.

Tears swelled in my eyes as I tried to fight the gagging sensation that swelled. I was a novice at this. His member twitched as he moaned loudly, finding his release in my throat. For a moment, it felt I could not breathe. He probably lost control in that second, suddenly letting me go, allowing me to pull away, only to cough.

"Shit Rem... I’m sorry, I lost it." Alijah quickly apologized, grabbing onto my stunned self.

It took a few coughs before I gazed at him. His remorseful gaze caused me to grip onto his member once again before stroking it again. There was no way that had been enough for him.

“Wait, Rem,” he breathed, gazing at me, swallowing what was left in my mouth.

His cheeks were bright pink, triggering me to smile at him, licking my lips. Perhaps the moon was affecting me, too. He seemed star-struck by me. I was not angry with him for losing control, though I wished he had been gentler when he did.

Probably if it were a normal day, I would have gotten my revenge somehow. But for today... I would forgive my wolf. The moment I caressed and kissed him again, he seemed unable to say anything. The only thing that left his lips were moans for me.

I enjoyed every minute because of it. After all, I had never heard him sound like that before. I mean, he would moan, but not as much as he did that night. I could not count how many times I made my wolf find his release, but the moment the blood moon passed, I lost consciousness.

Not because of what I was doing to him, but because something felt like it snapped within me the moment it ended. When I woke up, Alijah and Vera were speaking about something that I could not quite catch. My hearing at first was muffled.

And by the time they noticed I was awake, Vera stopped in her tracks before hugging me ever so tightly. For a moment, I was disoriented. I did not know what was going on, but it was not long before they helped me locate myself. I had been asleep for two entire days.

I had missed a few things that happened that same night, thanks to that. Vera had been attacked by Edna, but thankfully nothing happened. She was with Leonard, who had stayed near them, and Mom during the blood moon. Yet somehow Edna had invaded her mind.

Though it was brief, it seemed my sister kept Edna at bay that night. She also informed me the curse that had plagued my body seemed to have been purified by the moon. Though that alone seemed surreal to me.

Something was not right. Was having to get used to it another of Midnight's lies? Or was this attack on Vera something she did not see? Or maybe she had... was this why she said that? This would be a loss for me.

Midnight’s last words were still vivid in my mind. I could not understand what was going on anymore, but Vera was right. I did not feel the curse within me anymore. Not only that, but my cycle seemed in full swing, too. I had never bled this much before.

The cramps were something else, too. Though right now they were duller than the first few hours. Well, when I was with Alijah. This led me to understand why Vera usually got in a horrible mood when she was in it. I was in one too. It was a first for me.

After being informed of what I missed, I broke down about everything I had experienced with Midnight. Even though I did not know why I was crying, instead of judging me, they both listened to me, wiping my tears away.

Their warmth was almost too much. I did not know what was wrong or right anymore. Midnight had left me with so much information that my brain felt like it was overwhelmed. And not only that, but I also felt responsible for everything. After all, Fenrir was the one who started the war against the book.

I bled for three more days after I woke up, making it five days of torture in total. Even though I was grumpy most of the time, Alijah was sweet to me, even cuddled me. Though I pouted most of the time. I mean, he made everyone leave me alone for the entire week. It helped me to acclimate to my new normal too.

Being alone with Alijah allowed me to take some time to understand what changed. Thanks to that, I quickly noticed something was wrong with me after all. Though the flames Midnight blessed me with were gone. They never responded.

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No matter what I did, not even a spark would show in their place. Even though they had sprouted out of me the night of the blood moon, they seemed to be silent and out of reach. That would lead yet to another hurdle to overcome.

Nothing fucking comes easy, does it?

However, what bothered me the most was that even though the curse had been lifted from me, there was no change in me. I thought I would end up caring for people more if I were ever free of its hold. But I did not. I mean, I thought children were something better left untouched.

But adults, I could not give a damn what happened to them. Especially those who seek to harm my family. Only my family and Alijah were the ones who kept me on the side of good. So, it appeared all the curse did was make the beast within me wild.

It made me wonder if this was how Fenrir also felt about Valdios. Especially when he was taken.

How did I feel back then? Did it hurt?

Back when I thought I would lose Alijah, my heart broke.

Fenrir… I won’t allow anyone to take those I care about again.

Though if it was for Alijah alone, he would probably kill everyone around us just to keep me safe. Perhaps I was the one who held us on the side of good. And that thought did not bother me at all. But... Maybe... I was born with the darkness already embedded in my heart.

After all, that was the reason it terrified me to shift. The beast within would probably come out and make me lose control. This time there was no curse to blame it on, either.

Come to think of it... was it even the curse making me lose control? Or just me? Perhaps Mom and Dad had the right idea to keep me locked up.

Though... now if I died, it would not matter anymore. Or did it? I still did not understand what happened to me during the times my body expired. Was it really just Midnight? Or something else?

The more I looked for explanations, the more confused I got. Though with the curse gone, I felt more stable than ever before. Even though my mind was a mess. Even though I felt annoyed or angry, I would not lose control. I was finally just like any other hot head Lycan in this world.

Sadly, my magic remained unpredictable even without the curse inhibiting it. That had to do more with the blood that coursed through my veins. Lycans were never supposed to control magic, let alone a half-breed like me. Even though the flames were missing, I still saw the souls of the lost but could do nothing to help them pass.

Alijah tried to tell me to not worry about it, that I would somehow get the hang of this new power, but honestly, I did not know if I would at this point. Did everything have to be this hard? I had no way to know. Sadly, I did not know how it worked.

Perhaps that was the problem. Everything that was happening to me was so new that I lacked the knowledge to understand it. I did not know what I was doing with magic. It felt like I was lost in the sea that was my life.

The only thing that was clear to me was that Midnight gifted me something that was out of my reach. And that I truly was the reincarnation of the god of war, Fenrir. Throughout this time, Alijah was trying to be a supportive husband. Though I wished he would have been harder on me.

Maybe then I would have some type of progress, but all he did was baby me. Probably because he was happy that I was back, but we were not out of danger yet. There was no reason for anyone to go easy on me. Especially now that Edna had tried to take Vera down.

Surprisingly and suspiciously, my sister, herself, was being sweet as sugar too, which was alarming. If anyone was going to set me straight, it was her. So, when she did not, it was out of character for her. Instead, pushing me, she spent most of the day with me. Especially when I was on my cycle.

Vera even made me teas to make me feel better. This was a side of her I was not used to... was it the hormones? Or something else? Had something happened during the time Edna attacked Vera? Every time I tried to ask my sister about it, she would avoid it, which was annoying.

She was hiding something from me too, and I did not know what it was. To her, everything was fine. All she wanted to do was enjoy the time we had together. After all, none of us knew how much longer the peace would last.

Placing my worries behind, I tried to focus on things I could control, my magic. Although unstable, it was still useable. Or at least I thought. After my cycle finished, my training with Leonard began once again. I thought my life would have returned to normal, but it... seemed to be more complicated than ever before.

My magic was so out of control that it made things hazardous for Leonard and me when we trained. It also made it worse for my brothers, who would also feel the effects if they stood too close to me. Alijah had to baby me even more because of it, which annoyed me.

This was because the bond Midnight made for us made him immune to my influences. And the only one who could cancel to a point. Leonard did not mind the random things that happened during our spars, but I did. It was nothing life-threatening, but it was making the souls even visible to others.

Aiden and Caden were so freaked out by it they would beg Alijah to do something about it, but it was starting to be out of his control too. He had always suppressed them, but now, if anyone stood within a close radius of me, they would also see souls.

Something that freaked out the maids. At least they could not hear them, which was a blessing. After all, the dead souls never were silent. If this was Midnight's life before she was dragged into the soul cairn, then I sympathized with her. Although this was my life now, too.

Did she love Fenrir? Or did she want to have her revenge?

Even though the souls terrorized everyone around me, the flames continued to be absent and out of my reach. Usually, magic had to have a certain emotion behind it, but what did mine require? I would not know. I mean, Mom lectured me once that negative emotions influenced witchcraft.

So, what influenced mine? Anger? No... happiness? No...

Nothing seemed to work. Lately, all I felt was frustration. And the angrier I got the worse my other magic became. Even though it seemed like a dead-end, Vera continued to teach me the arcane ways during the time Leonard or Alijah were not training me. Though it seemed my patience was being tested.

Even though I had a lot on me, my relationship with Alijah did not change at all. Well... until he tried to push me to shift once again, almost a week after my rest. To him, I had to learn how to control the beast within me, but that was impossible for me to do. Most lumas could never get over the beast within the wolf form.

Even if I was more than the normal hybrid, I did not have confidence in it. Some could though and obviously, I was not in that elite group. I had already killed plenty of people every time I shifted. Sadly, I could not shake the thought that the thing that was keeping me from killing my family was Midnight herself.

With her gone then... I... could never allow that to happen. It led to a fight breaking out between us. That was not unusual with us, but this time I shut him down harsher than I had ever done before. In a fit, I ran out of the stadium.

Before I knew it, I tried to find fresh air where everything began. Where I first met Midnight in this life. Though I did not remember her. Laying on the roof, I closed my eyes, trying to find some wisdom somewhere within my memories.

Perhaps I hoped the starry sky that lay in front of me would speak to me, too. However, it was interrupted by my sister trying to climb up onto the roof with me. Before I could rise to see what she wanted, Vera got up onto where I was, walking towards me before sitting down next to me.

Did she see me run here after my fight with Alijah? Shit...

I was shameless.

"You didn’t have to come up here," I mumbled, feeling annoyed.

Vera shrugged; her belly was so swollen now that I wondered how she could even walk. She was due in less than two months. Then again, in the pictures of my mother’s pregnancy, she also looked like she was ready to pop.

"Hm... I think I can do what I want." Vera pointed out.

I clicked my tongue, laying back down, turning away from her. I was not in the mood for lectures.

"If you get hurt don’t come crying to me." I huffed.

In response to my hostile demeanor, Vera sighed, poking my arm, leaving me grumbling. I wanted to be left alone. Luckily, I could not lose control anymore. That was good. Yet at the same time, that worried me.

"Such an angry little luma. Rem, what are you doing?" She started.

I did not want to follow along this time. My head was too much of a mess, trying to figure everything out. She was also hiding something from me, that much I knew, but...

"I don’t know," I mumbled, grabbing onto my chest.

I did not feel like myself since the blood moon ended. I was... an utter mess. Nothing new, though.

"Being a scaredy-cat doesn’t suit you, Rem. Where did my hardheaded sister go to?" she prodded.

I remained silent for a moment. I did not want to answer her, but I had no choice. She was never one to back down. If I did not answer, she would continue to pester me more.

Annoying…

"Maybe it’s because I can die for real if I do one mistake," I growled, not wanting to continue this conversation.

Vera never stopped, though. She always sought a challenge to the end. I would be no different.

"I doubt that. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be where you first died." She countered.

I sat up to face her, scowling. She was relentless, and I could not deny her that, because death did not scare me at all. No, what did scare me were their deaths. And that I felt helpless to stop it.

Why do I have to struggle for everything in this life, too? Eh...

I wonder why that thought came to mind. I guess Fenrir had a tough life after Valdios died. Was that what I was referring to?

Fuck this! Fuck everything!

"Don’t pretend to think you know what I’m feeling!" I snapped.

She smiled in return gently. Something I did not expect. Then again, she had not been the same since Edna's attack.

What’s wrong? Why doesn’t she confide in me? This... isn’t my usual sister...

Surely it could not be because of the pregnancy. Then again, I knew nothing about that process.

Can people change this fast? Mood swings are a thing, but personality changes...?

"But I do. It’s scary to hurt someone you love, isn’t it? That’s what you fear, always has been. Death is something you love to dance around." Vera broke me down piece by piece.

I seemed to have forgotten who my other half was other than Alijah. My always watchful and tactful sister, who was the one who could catalyze my unstable magic to something useable. My better half, if I were to say.

"Vera," I mumbled.

She cupped my cheeks in her tiny hands. Her touch was so warm that it comforted me. For her... I would also fight.

But why are you hiding things from me? Is it because I ran away once? No… you forgave me for that.

"When you woke up after the moon you told me you thought Edna is like you, but you aren’t." Vera tried to convince me.

All I could do was shake my head in disbelief.

"You already told me that." I tried to shut Vera down.

She tugged me closer towards her. My face rested on her bosom. I wanted to pull away, but could not do so without hurting her.

Come to think of it, Ruzgard isn’t up here.

Probably was on the balcony with Alijah. They both were never far from us.

"Well, listen to me again. You are nothing like Edna. She has caused every misfortune that has ever happened to this family and many others. Even if she had valid reasons, like Midnight said. She should have found another way. There is always another way!" Vera held me tightly.

Unable to take it, I slightly freed myself from her, only to gaze at her in awe.

How...

The way she worded her thought it left me bewildered.

How does she know Edna has a valid reason? Is it because I mentioned what Midnight said to me?

No... that would have been speculation, and Vera never did that.

She... something... happened...

Something I was not aware of. I was not the sharpest tool, but I was far from a damned fool.

"Why do you say that?" I questioned.

She seemed surprised by my sudden query. It was not long before she noticed what had happened. I had never seen her backtrack so much in the hopes I would let it go.

"Oh, nothing. Just assumptions." Vera dismissed.

I released a low growl from my lips. There was no way I could fight to force her to tell me. She was smarter than me and would outmaneuver me if I tried. So, I would have to be sneakier. Or she might have hopped into the soul cairn to avoid me altogether.

Something that was not wise in her condition. So, even though I wanted to press her as she came here to do to me. I bit my tongue, letting it go. It was lucky enough that the attack she had endured did not cause her to have a premature birth.

And that was the last thing I wanted to cause. Yet it was something possible in her fragile state. Vampire pregnancies were not the easiest.

"I see," I mumbled, glancing away.

Vera took that opportunity to shift the conversation back towards me.

"So..." She cleared her throat a bit, continuing to pursue me.

"Why don't you want to shift? I thought Lycans could never wait for it to happen." Vera got right back into what she wanted.

I sighed.

"I... am not an actual wolf, Vera. Nor am I a god, or anything you people want me to be. I’m just me. And I still can't shake off how Midnight kept calling me Fenrir." I pointed out the obvious, pouting.

She chuckled.

"So, what, Rem." Vera rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

“You’re half one, yeah, I know. So what?" she added.

I turned to face her again. The night sky could not keep my eyes away from her for long. Her words were too sharp to ignore.

"That makes an enormous difference," I growled.

Vera rolled her eyes again, patting her swollen belly.

"Well, I’m five percent Lycan, too. So, what? If I could shift, I would!" She assured.

I could not accept that. Even though we were fraternal twin sisters, we were so different.

"That isn’t enough to shift. You are a human, Vera. The most powerful witch to live! How can you understand me?!" I argued.

She shrugged, triggering me. Now... she was safe from me. The moment that thought left my mind, once again I was left pondering what the fuck the curse was messing with. Midnight's words, as well as Vera's, raced through my mind.

I realized something that might have been staring at me this whole time. The curse was not making me bloodthirsty when I was angry. It was making my untamed beast come out, even though I was in my humanoid form.

A connection that was shattered when the curse was purified. Yet was it the moon who did so? Or something else? I… I did not know what to think anymore.

Is this what Midnight meant by me having to learn to live with it? Impossible...

It could not have been this what she meant.

Midna... why did you have to leave me alone in this? Eh… why did I use that nickname?

It had flowed so easily into me. At that moment, I realized what was truly wrong with me. I had felt empty ever since the moon ended. And I was. After all, I was missing an entire being that used to be part of me until recently.

"I have always been jealous of Caden and Aiden because they could shift with ease. It’s a gift." Vera's words snapped me out.

I grabbed onto my face in disappointment.

A gift...

I did not see it like that at all.

"A curse." I corrected, feeling bitter.

I knew what I had to do. Even though I did not want to... I needed to shift. To learn to control whatever my wolf's form offered. It was what connected me to Fenrir. Though it terrified me. If the curse linked that part of me out, then the beast would not be easy to control.

Another factor that worried me was that I did not know if I would get possessed by another shadow beast. It was clear I had a susceptibility to the soul cairn. With Midnight gone, I...

"Funny. We both hate what we were gifted with." Vera commented, gazing up towards the sky.

I clenched my trembling hands into fists, standing up from where I sat. My sister was right. Being like this did not suit me at all. I once condemned many to die to save Alijah. This time he would be there to snap me out, too.

And not only him, but everyone else also would be there too. Minus my pregnant sister. There was no way I would allow her to be there.

"I guess. That’s why we complete each other." I simpered, releasing a sigh, reaching out to Vera to help her up.

"I guess. Though I complete you more than you do to me." She assured, grabbing onto my hand.

I tugged her up to her feet, smirking.

"You... aren’t cute at all. Leonard is blinder than a bat." I teased.

She puffed up right away, placing her hands on her hips.

"Excuse me? I’m adorable." Vera huffed, narrowing her purple orbs.

Adorable was not quite it either. Her silver hair waved in the slight gust that came. She was beautiful. At that moment, an opportunity arose. A test… I grabbed onto her shoulders.

"I’ll try to shift if you give him a chance." I declared, observing her.

For a moment she widened her eyes, surprised by my statement.

"Rem..." Vera grumbled, slightly pink on her cheeks.

She and Leonard had been friendlier since the beach, but it had not been enough to call them lovers. Though I did this for a different reason than to know if she wanted to date him. After all, Vera...

"Fine,” she mumbled, gazing away from me.

In an instant, I felt off.

Shit… I have to…

Instantly I pulled away from her, smiling like always, walking back to the balcony that connected to the roof.

Nothing is right.

"Then, I promise I’ll try to dominate the beast within me." I declared, slowly helping her off the roof.

Just as I thought, Alijah was right by the door with Ruzgard. Noticing my wolf, Vera smirked.

"Hm, I don’t know about you, but if my count is right, Rem here must smell really sweet to you right now. Is that why you’re moody, wolfie?" Vera quickly assessed.

I tilted my head, not knowing what she was talking about. Alijah's cheeks flushed red, though. His expression had made me realize he had not touched me since my period ended. We had been so busy with everything else that; I had not noticed.

"Witch... watch it," Alijah growled.

All it did was define Vera's smirk bigger. She was enjoying his response. There was my sister… The normal one.

"I can tell from the way you’ve been watching her since this morning. Don’t worry, overprotective wolf, I have no testicles to impregnate her. So, there is no need to watch her like that when she is with me." Vera patted Alijah's shoulder on her way out.

He could not help but shake his head, grumbling at her before turning towards me. My mind was too full of things to even realize what she was talking about. But the moment I saw Alijah's expression.

All my worries and thoughts melted away. It made me realize what Vera was going on about in a heartbeat. The desire in his eyes was one that I could barely handle, yet he did not move towards me to claim me.

No... instead, he gazed down towards the floor.

"I’m sorry for earlier." Alijah tried to apologize.

I launched myself at him before hugging him the moment he was in my arms. What we fought about did not matter anymore. No… There were other things I needed to focus on, but I could not allow her to know.

"I’m sorry too," I whispered.

He instinctively released a nervous chuckle, placing his arm around me. I had only been thinking of myself when everyone else had their issues going on. Alijah had been holding himself back from touching me to give me the space I needed.

This was probably because he thought what happened during the blood moon was excessive on his part. Not that I minded it, but he thought it had been hard on me. So, he selflessly left me be until I approached him. He was a loving husband.

"I was pushy, so you don’t have to say..." Alijah tried to disagree with my apology.

I did not let him finish. That argument was irrelevant anymore.

"I smell sweet?" I asked straight up, fluttering my hopeful eyes.

My sudden question caused his cheeks, instantly became a shade of pink. I had never seen him gaze away that quickly before.

Is he shy? Adorable…

"Yeah, you do. Too sweet." Alijah mumbled, his grip on me tightened.

Ah… This is why he glared at Leonard and my brothers when they got too close. Such a silly wolf.

I could not help giggle in a burst of happiness. Finally, I could bear him a child if we wanted to, but... Right now, it would be irresponsible. After all, I had the world's fate on my shoulders.

Then again, when would I not have it on me. Midnight selfishly sent me on this errand to save all the souls from the soul cairn.

Fuck everything! This is my now, and I won’t look for tomorrow to get what I want.

What I would say next... would be the most selfish thing I would ever do, but then again, there was no better time than now.

"Then... shall we try?" I suddenly asked Alijah, who seemed dumbfounded by my question.

"A-are you sure?" He replied with his question.

The surprise on his face was cute.

By the gods, I’m the happiest with him.

I gazed at him without backing down. His cheeks were so pink that I wanted to burn this memory into my mind, too.

Ah... I finally found something I can tease him about. My adorable... husband.

"Is that why you haven’t held me since the red moon?" I asked, only to see his reaction.

He fumbled with his words somewhat.

"N-No... I-I mean... k-kind of, but n-not because of w-what you think." Alijah fumbled.

I could not help but find him charming. Especially when he tried to avoid my gaze.

I love you.

"Then will you?" I continued my query.

He gazed to the side, grabbing onto his chest.

"Are you sure, Rem?" Alijah asked again.

I grabbed onto his shirt, triggering his gaze to shift back to me.

"You don’t want to?" I whimpered.

His tone shifted faster than lightning. Thought that flustered look was one to die for.

"O-of course, I do. I-I would put twenty in you if I could." Alijah reassured, gazing straight into my eyes.

I simpered happily by the way he was acting. It was good to see him flustered at times, too.

"Hm… Only two at most, my love." I hummed happily.

Alijah seemed to break at that moment when he noticed I was playing with him.

"I was exaggerating." Alijah sighed, releasing a growl.

Ah… it was nice while it lasted.

I was enjoying this gift Vera had left me with. And I hoped more of these moments would come along.

"Though I wouldn’t mind if you only gave me one. I never wanted one before you." Alijah cleared his throat, trying to control himself.

He did not want to bend to my tune again. I wrapped my arms around his neck, dragging myself up to meet with his lips lightly. Pulling away from them, I tugged his head down so my lips were near his fluffy ear.

"Then... hold me like you used to. And if it happens, then it’s meant to be." I purred into Alijah's ear.

It twitched because of it. Instantly he picked me up bridal style, kissing me deeply soon after lifting me. The moment he pulled away from my lips, it left me yearning for more.

"Do you even know how hard it has been to not touch you at all? Perhaps I was being too gentle with you." Alijah growled.

Though instead of annoyance, there was a grin on his lips.

"Maybe." I pretended not to know.

My wolf chuckled before carrying me back to our room. Even though his touch was sweeter and more passionate than ever before, something kept playing in the back of my mind. Something that would not be blown away.

No matter how many times he made me lose myself within him. And that was... that there was something wrong with my sister.