After I calmed down a bit, Dad announced to everyone in the room that the next blood moon would be in six months. It was like the cherry on top of the sundae that my life had suddenly become. After waking up from that dreamland, everything had gotten so much worse than I could have ever thought.
Everywhere I looked was an utter mess. All I wanted was to live a life with Alijah, to travel and see the beauty of this world with him. Not fight gods, or have Alijah bonded to me to where, if something happened to me, it would take him down with me. Even if he called it a type of marriage.
After all, none of those ever end in death when one participant expired. And now with what Midnight had said. Everything... was too much. I felt like my head wanted to spin in place.
How will I ever figure any of this out?
The world was becoming a scarier place than I ever thought possible. Unable to take it any longer, I suddenly stood up and ran out of the room with no actual destination in mind. I could hear my Mom call out for me, but everything was much more than I could ever bite.
Midnight turned out to be the goddess of rebirth, who had the intention of becoming part of me because another divine played their cards on me. Or she wanted to consume me for her own will to take place. The previous day, she had called me nature's way to combat what was coming.
Why does it have to be me? Why is it getting hard to breathe? Ah... because suddenly the entire world depends on me instead of the fate of one man.
A man someone destined me to love because of a god's whim. I still could not digest how Alijah was the reincarnation of that god's dead brother. While I was part of this other one, that made everything happen.
Alijah, why is this happening? Why is everything so confusing? How can I swallow any of this?
I was supposed to be the unstable link, not what held the world together. I was supposed to be the burden, not the solution.
How the fuck will I manage that when I can’t even control my emotions or anger? How can a savior be such a mess? How can I ever save anyone like this? I am just a luma.
I was a stupid hybrid who was supposed to be the useless one of the bunch. A degrading fact that the Silver Fang family needed to hide. That was all I was supposed to be and ever could be. Suddenly, before I even knew it, a portal appeared in front of me.
Vera intercepted me when she emerged from it, stopping me in my tracks. Alijah was right behind me, too. Probably my brothers too knowing them. Yet all I wanted to do was run away.
Why do you stop me? I can’t stay here. I...
"Where do you think you are going?" Vera chided, staring at me with her purple orbs.
All I could do was growl at her. I did not appreciate being cornered like this. After all, I desired to air my head for a bit. I needed space to digest everything.
Why can’t they leave me alone for a bit?
"Out of my way, Vera," I warned her to back off.
She would not, though. It was never her style. Though, Ruzgard was eyeing me down like he could go at me at any moment. Vera should have been terrified of me. Yet again, she showed nothing of it.
"After everything you have done, you want to run away. How foolish can you be, Rem?" Vera chastised me.
Her words irritated me.
"I never wanted this to happen!" I snapped, feeling off again.
The same black aura was radiating from me again. I could not understand why all of them would not let me be alone for just a second. I never really had any moment to breathe since I came back from my safe space. A single moment to breathe freely.
Then again, my clock was running out too. Because of that, she was not willing to wait for me to digest it. Instead, she planned to hammer it in to me when she suddenly pointed to Alijah, who was behind me, causing my gaze to follow along.
"Tell me, Rem, do you regret saving him?!?" Vera questioned, stopping my train of thought right where it was.
That... was something I... would never regret. Even if it had not ended with him by my side. He was my everything.
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?!?" I snarled.
Vera kept pointing at him.
"I would never regret saving him! To even think that is unforgivable! Don’t anger me any more than I am!" I warned again, not liking her question at all.
That was not fair. My feelings for Alijah, even if they were not made by me, were real. I felt it every time his skin brushed with mine. Every time I was in his arms. When his voice vibrated my eardrums. Everything about him.
Ah... Perhaps I’m made for my wolf by his brother, just like Midnight says. Fuck it...
If that was what Fenrir wanted, then I would shower his brother with the love that filled my soul. And if I was him, then there was no way I could not love Alijah. There was no doubt in my mind anymore about that.
Getting involved with Alijah and betraying my family to save him would be something I never regretted. Fate bound me to him. And I... did not care if I had a part of a god within me. As long as I could be with him, then I would be happy.
"Then suck it up, sis. This is your new life! You chose that night when you deceived us and went on your own way. That brought this future to us!" Vera pulled no punches.
I was not ready for that. The responsibility of having their lives on my shoulders. It was too much. Alijah was one thing, but the world... The world was something I... was at a loss for words.
However, Vera was not done with me. Everything she said was true. My choices led us to where we were. That was something I could never rebuke. Perhaps if I had not saved Alijah, we would have been facing a different future. Maybe it would have been a better one. Or it could have been worse.
Wait...
I had never thought about it before, but… what would have happened if I had not intervened that night? Would have Alijah been captured?
No...
There was no way he would have been, since he was too strong for my father and brothers to handle. Even Vera would have been eventually run over by Alijah.
So does that mean that I already...
"It’s time to grow up, Rem. You need to realize your choices brought us here! Own up to it!" Vera pointed out the irrefutable yet again.
I fell onto my knees, defeated by her. It felt like the weight of the world was on me and it was heavier than anything I had ever felt. I never wanted this. Yet I... already might have saved it once before without even knowing it.
If Alijah would have killed everyone, then he would have fallen into Edna's hands and into that book's desires. Even so... all I ever wanted was to save him, not this. This was too much, even for me.
"I never wanted this to happen!" I yelled, feeling the full weight of what my sister was saying.
She took a few steps towards me, kneeling in front of me. Her silver hair reached the floor below, capturing my eyes. Even though darkness was radiating from me, she did not seem to care.
"No one ever wants anything like this to happen. But this is what you got!" Vera sighed, grabbing onto my shoulders.
I could barely hold it. She should have been afraid, yet there was no ounce of it in her. She was a fearless woman. No matter what I did, I would always be her annoying sister.
"I..." I mumbled, unable to handle anything that was being thrown my way.
How will I ever do this?
"Rem, are you an idiot?" Vera huffed, already suspecting what was going through my mind.
I gazed up at her, expecting to be yelled at some more, but she had the gentlest expression on her face.
"You are probably thinking something along the lines that you are alone in this. Probably also think that you have to figure it out all by yourself. But you aren’t alone! You got that cantankerous wolf and your entire family behind you! So, don't you fucking try to run away from the mess this has become!" Vera simpered at me.
I felt tears running down my cheeks.
How... can I ever reach her?
"Everything is just a fucking mess, isn't it?" I sobbed.
In response, she smiled, nodding as Alijah kneeled next to us and patted my head lightly.
"Life is always like this, my love." He tried to comfort me.
It broke me. They were all being so warm.
Why are they like this when I’m such a handful to them? I guess I’m loved beyond belief.
Even Vera was trying to be less of a bully than she usually was. Everything had to be as bad or worse than I thought for Vera to be so nice twice in a row.
"Alijah!" I cried, throwing myself onto his chest.
The way his arms engulfed me was tender.
"We will figure this out." He reassured me.
I nodded my head in response.
"Oi, why don't you two get a room already!" Vera scuffed, getting away from us.
She was not able to stand the fluff that was happening in front of her, but before she could get too far. I turned to her, clinging to Alijah.
"Thank you! For being there for me even though I’m a handful." I tried to smile at her.
She huffed in return.
"Your face is so ugly," Vera grumbled at me, heading back to the dinner.
Alijah helped me up as my brothers peeked from the side corner in the hall that we were in. Upon spotting the two interlopers, Alijah rolled his eyes, pulling me to meet with my lips. The moment his tongue brushed with my bottom lip, Caden grabbed onto Alijah's shoulder. He seemed flustered and about to blow.
"Don’t get ahead of yourself! The last time you got lucky, Sophie was passing by! She dragged us away! I won’t let you taint my baby sister!" Caden growled, feeling overprotective of me.
Alijah chuckled, holding me closer to him. He was not threatened by my brothers at all. Instead, he took it upon himself to make sure they knew their place.
"Oh... You won’t let me taint her? But you were pestering me so much about what I did earlier. I thought I should just show you instead." Alijah teased both my brothers.
Caden seemed broken by that statement as Aiden took the lead for his fallen brother.
"Oi... She is our precious sister! Don't touch her lightly." Aiden said, eyes twitching.
It was creepy.
Did somehow Fenrir's affections for his brother got inherited down to these two too? But instead of Alijah for me? Ew... No... That would be disgusting.
The gods might not give a damn about it, but mortals did.
"Touch her lightly? Are you kidding me? From the moment I held her, I have never touched her lightly. Not once, pup." Alijah continued.
However, his words caused me to grab onto his shirt. His teases were working on me, too. It was almost like a triple combo for my wolf. I was embarrassed beyond belief. These three were too much.
"Don't tell them that!" I whimpered, feeling the full force of his tease.
Something he did not mind since I was also being punished for not saying anything to him.
"Well, aren't you adorable? Getting shy over this even though you are still hiding things from me." Alijah narrowed his eyes.
At that point, I knew I was doomed. Even though he had been comforting me earlier, it did not mean I would escape my punishment after what he heard at dinner. Midnight... had provoked all the anger he had tried to suppress before.
In response, I could only gulp while he turned to my stunned brothers, who were slowly recovering.
"A-Alijah... don’t think we will stand for this because we like you!" Caden tried to snap out of his initial shock.
My wolf smirked in return.
"Oh? What will you do?" he challenged the brothers.
They seemed to be in a stalemate. They would not dare touch my wolf, who, while I was unaware, had already shown them how strong he was. In response, my brothers growled while I tried to steady myself.
Ah... It won’t matter if I add to it.
After all, I would not let him do as he pleased anymore. Even if antagonizing my brothers seemed fun. I wish I could have done that too. Maybe I could try to provoke them all.
Snapping out of my emotions that threatened to drown me, I stood my ground. After all, arguing with Alijah was one thing that felt normal. It was something usual, and I needed that.
"Okay... it seems you have forgotten your place in the month you’ve been free from me." I shook away all the fears.
They really did not suit me.
What is happening to my usual self that faces everything head-on? Come on, Rem! You are a fighter!
After all, I did not care even when it would have ended in my unhappiness. I used to be the girl that did not stay quiet no matter what anyone said to her.
Ah... this gloomy me really does not do me justice.
"What?" Alijah mumbled.
I grabbed onto his ear, tugging it down to my level. My wolf was much taller than I was. This simple action though surprised my brothers. Especially since Alijah did not swat me away. My one advantage, even though the original bond was gone, was that he would never hurt me.
No matter what I did, or so I thought. Though this time... he was free to do anything he wished for what I said or did. After pulling him down, I grabbed onto his cheeks and pressed my lips against his, sticking my tongue into his mouth. It triggered a moan of surprise to leave his lips.
"Maybe I should teach you who is the boss again." I licked my lips after I separated from Alijah.
He could not help but burst out laughing, turning my cheeks pink. It was genuine, but the way his eyes glowed also showed annoyance. Grabbing me by my chin, he pulled me close to his face. My brothers seemed to be frozen in time because of what I had done. It must have shattered their image of me.
I was not the innocent girl that left the manor all those months ago.
"Oh, silly luma, there you go, stirring me up again. What I would give to fuck you right here at this very moment." Alijah smirked.
His grip on me was gentle, even though his words seemed rough. The look in his eyes, though... I felt like he would devour me right where I stood. Not that I minded it.
"But that will make you cry, and I don’t want that. So, I’ll save this conversation for when we are in the room alone again." Alijah added, pulling away, leaving my heart in full flutter.
I kind of... wanted him to wreck me right where I was. Though the moment Alijah grabbed me by my hand, I noticed my brothers once again snapping me out of that desire. My brothers, who were speechless after what they had witnessed, slowly followed us. It seemed everything I said did not affect Alijah, who acted normally. Though my brothers remained mostly silent the rest of the night.
The moment I stepped back into the room, Mom engulfed me in her arms, telling me she could not fathom how I felt, but that she would be with me the whole way. Dad said a similar thing, hugging me even tighter than Mom did.
Even antisocial Shade hopped on me and told me not to worry. It was almost as if everyone knew how I felt. After all, in their youths, they had to face similar things that tested their wills. Even so, they were all trying to cover me in any way I needed.
I was not alone, far from it. Vera, who ate quietly after our discussion, was right about everything she said. Everyone around me loved and supported me. Even Sophie, who used to be the only friend I ever had.
Sadly, we had grown apart when she got more involved with Cerberus, cutting our time short. Though, she assured me she would be there for me too. Though after dinner, when we congregated in the living room, everything got serious again. Everyone discussed things I could barely follow.
Apparently, Tania was going to bring someone to help me learn to use a blade. Dad was going to prepare the council for what was coming. It seemed I would need to go with them too when they were ready to receive me.
Meeting the council was something Alijah was not looking forward to. Unfortunately, it also meant meeting the Lycan elders who wanted to speak with him. Although they were not the same people from his time, he still wished to avoid it altogether.
After Tania came back with my instructor, Uncle Ben would go with her to find any information about Edna. Vera would work with Mom to find anything from the soul cairn. Aunty Amelia and Melody would hold the fort for us. Uncle Liam and Sophie would help dad with everything needed for Cerberus.
Alijah would train Caden, Aiden, and me for actual combat. Vera would also have to join us. Especially since she proved to be weak in that aspect during the fight with Midnight. A battle I did not recall at all. It felt surreal to even think Vera could have slipped so badly that Mom placed her back into training with us.
Something she was not happy to hear. Unlike other witches, Vera owned no grimoire, no one really knew why, but they theorized it was because of the Lycan blood within her. It prevented her from creating a grimoire when her powers awakened. It was not like she needed one, though.
Vera could memorize a spell from reading it once. Something I lacked, even though I could not cast normal spells either way. My sister did not have to chant it to make it a reality. She needed the sacrifice, though.
Plants, blood, anything living... This was what witchcraft, also known as sacrificial magic, was. So, to hear her having to train with us with Alijah as our teacher was quite a shock. The news caused Vera to storm out of the house. She thought it was unnecessary.
Sophie went after her, but they never made it back before everyone called it a night. Vera probably went to blow some steam somewhere. Unlike normal people, she did not need to use an airship to travel. Though it worried me, she dragged Sophie along with her.
By the time everything was ending, I was almost passing out on Alijah on the couch. Instead of getting annoyed with me, he let me use him as a bed while everyone worked the kinks. Though something important came up.
Dad did not know how he or any of us would react during the blood moon. This included Alijah, who could flip again during it. Although he reassured us, he would be fine. The only real wild cards would be Caden, Aiden, and me.
Perhaps Vera too, since none of us knew how anything would affect her either. During the last moon, Dad lost control when he got his powers or blessings, as Midnight called it. Alijah was more willing to lose it than Dad, though. So, there was no telling how they both would react to this blood moon, either.
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The moment everyone was done planning, Alijah helped a drowsy me from the couch and towards my room. Somehow, my brothers did not follow us this time. Even so, Alijah locked the door once again and turned on the sigil, pushing me face-first onto the newly tended bed. He pinned me down with one of his hands while his chest was on my back.
Uh Oh...
I surely was not sleepy anymore.
"Alijah?" I mumbled his name.
He held me down with one hand, slipping his other down into my shorts. A gasp left my mouth as he caressed my vulva with his fingers. Even though the night was cold, his touch was too warm for me. He had not forgotten my attempt to tease him earlier.
"So... How are you going to show me you are the boss? Did you think I forgot?" Alijah slid his fingers into my walls with ease, thanks to everything we had done.
He always knew how to press the right buttons to make me a mess. It was unfair. I wanted him to be one, too.
"Wait..." I tried to hold my voice.
His grip was relentless, though. There was no escaping it.
"I waited six thousand years to meet you. There is no more waiting for me, love." Alijah argued.
I could barely form words thanks to his treatment. He was being so rough with me, yet it did not bother me at all.
"Alijah, I..." I tried to apologize, only to stop for a mewl to leave instead.
He had found a sweet spot for me. Even though I should have felt numb after all we had done today, he always made me feel again.
"So... were you planning on blindfolding and marking me again?" Alijah asked, snickering a bit.
I shook my head in response. To be honest, though... I would probably blindfold and cuff him if I could, but he would break out as soon as I tried. Thankfully, compared to this morning, he seemed fine.
The wolfsbane was completely gone from his system. Or at least it was not hampering him anymore. That made it a no-brainer that I could never overpower him in his current state. Not that I wanted to. Even so... I would never have marked him like I did that night in the mushroom forest.
"No, I just..." I trailed off, feeling him pull his fingers out of my depths.
A second later, he took off my pants and underwear, too.
"Just?" Alijah urged me to continue, using his free hand to separate my legs.
He traced his hand on my bum, teasing me again.
"I wanted to tease you too." I whimpered, feeling overwhelmed by him.
He chuckled in response.
"You wanted to tease me? Hah, you are too young for that." Alijah pointed out, releasing me from his grip, only to grab onto my hips with both hands.
He made it sound like he was much older than me... but he was...
"It’s possible! You are only twenty-three yourself." I countered, glancing back at him
There I saw him genuinely surprised by what had left me.
"Silly girl, I was sent there when I was twenty-three. That was six thousand years ago, love." Alijah clarified, pressed his heat against my entrance.
A small gasp left me; I did not notice when he loosened his pants. Even though I wanted him, I could not let this go. I would let him know everything I felt. Otherwise, Midnight might have made him angrier if she ratted me out again.
"But life stopped for you. So, all those years don’t count." I pointed out.
Alijah tilted his head, utterly bewildered by what I had said. His lips held a soft smile, though.
"They don’t?" He mumbled in disbelief.
I grabbed onto my shirt, feeling a sting in my chest. The thoughts that were forming in my mind were not pleasant ones. Luckily, Alijah loosened his grip on my hips, allowing me to turn to face him.
"To be truthful, life probably stopped the moment Edna came into your life." I felt awful for him.
It really was not fair at all what happened to him.
"What?" Alijah continued, unable to follow along with the random things I was saying.
"The moment Lilith met you, she probably was trying to mold you to her liking. So, you never really lived anything real." I bit onto my lip, trying to hold in the rage that wanted to burst out of me.
Every word that the elf said irritated me.
Why did I... forget them? Ah... because it’s easier if it is that than Alijah loving her either way.
I was such a fool. Because of my insecurities, I was about to let this poor boy continue to get hurt. He had suffered enough. There was no forgiving them for what they had done.
Wait... Does that mean that the Lycans stop her plans once by killing Lilith? Or... is there something else at play?
I felt like I was missing so much... So much that I did not know what to do anymore.
"Rem..." Alijah called, grabbing onto my cheek.
I ruined the mood, but I also needed to know what I was missing. Midnight had said something about a note, which seemed to be important to Alijah. It also allowed her to know Edna was indeed part of the reason that he was imprisoned.
Was it to make him into a hateful being like Edna? Or had the book predicted something in the future that Edna wanted to accomplish? What am I missing? Everything is so infuriating. Nothing made sense. What is it that Edna wants with Alijah?
In the end, it did not matter why Edna wanted Alijah to be full of hate or a pawn for the book. It was all unforgivable. Having him suffer like that was reprehensible and punishable by death in my eyes.
Heh... Maybe I am Fenrir after all.
I would cause a war just to take Edna out for everything she had done. Just thinking about how it happened. How much pain Alijah must have endured to take him where he was made me want to murder them. All of them. They all deserved death, without the chance of rebirth. Total oblivion.
'Good girl. You are getting what I can offer you.' Midnight's voice echoed in my mind.
I glanced back at Alijah, who seemed concerned about me. Here I was, half-naked, while he had his pants undone as well.
"It is frustrating. I wish... I wish I would have been born sooner. Fenrir should have made me sooner!" I huffed, narrowing my eyes.
Alijah pulled himself up to meet my lips, pushing me back down onto the bed. Separating from me, he released a sigh.
"No... don’t say that. If you would have been born back in my era, you would have been a slave or worse." He kissed me again lightly, pulling away with a pained expression on his face.
"Hybrids were a pest that needed to be extinguished. Not that I understood why they were." He informed.
I was not fully convinced by him.
"But what if I was born a different race," I argued, reaching to touch my wolf's cheek.
He bit his lip, knowing that back then nothing would have mattered. Even if I was Fenrir, unless I would have been born to royal blood then...
"Nothing other than another Lycan would have made the elders happy. And the thought of them doing anything to you back then, I think I would have destroyed this world." Alijah disagreed with me about that.
It did not stop my desire to erase all the pain he felt. Noticing I was not pleased by how things had turned out, he softly caressed my cheek.
"Plus, you would not have been you unless you were born in your era. Even if we were gods in our past life. So don’t think like that. At least we are together now and will be for an eternity to come." Alijah reassured me with a soft smile.
I could not accept it. Though it was impossible for me to change history.
"But Alijah..." I tried to argue.
He stopped me with a kiss that would leave me breathless. After separating from me, a smirk rose on his lips, nuzzling my nose with his. He was so affectionate.
How could that elf do that to him? How could anyone do that to him? This world was cruel.
"My love, I am glad you were born in this era. Far away from all those prejudiced monsters that would have made your life a living nightmare." Alijah declared.
To him, all those years were worth it. After all, he survived them all and met me in the end. That, however, did not make me feel happy. I grabbed onto his shirt, finding my way to his cheeks. His words made me remember the time in Azear. When that stupid guard punched me like I was nothing.
It was not perfect here either.
Hah...
If Alijah ever found out about that incident, he probably would have destroyed the village. Even though he was a deadly being, his cheeks were so warm in my hands. Everything about him radiated warmth.
How could the people of old do that to him? Just how...
I hated them and myself for not saving him sooner. This affection would drown me.
"Everything is a mess now too though." I pointed out, trying to make my wolf realize it was not perfect.
He chuckled in response. I loved hearing his laugh too.
"A mess that feels like paradise since you are here, safe. Fenrir could not have chosen a better time to be reborn.” Alijah simpered, kissing me again.
It was a short one as he pulled away. His lips were glossy with my saliva.
“It makes everything I survived worth it. I am glad I did not give up on life even if I wanted to destroy it then." Alijah continued to woo me.
His ears were fully concentrated on me as his tail wagged slightly. I could not help but believe his words. His gaze and voice were all full of love. Not to say how adorable he was.
"You really are wonderful.” I kissed him, dragging my tongue on his lips.
His eyes were glowing lightly when I tugged away.
“But I hate Lilith for what she tried to do to you." I huffed, unable to hold this feeling that was building within me.
I wanted to kill her even though there was not an ounce of curse showing off from my body. A soft, gentle smile came to Alijah's lips, kissing my forehead. Even though his lovemaking was always so rough and wild when he was showing me affection. It was the gentlest touch I had ever felt. I felt like I could drown in it.
“I was always so full of hate before I met you, Rem. I thought it would overwhelm me and make me go crazy. Actually, I think I did for a bit,” he smiled, with a tender expression on his face.
Fond memories were rushing by him.
“But then I had these daydreams of an adorable little girl. She would not leave me alone, no matter how many times I tried to push her away. I never thought she would suddenly become an irreplaceable aspect in my life." Alijah declared, caressing my cheek with his thumb.
Again, the gentlest smile was still on his lips as he spoke. It was glorious for my eyes.
"Alijah." I breathed, feeling every word he was saying.
He was not done, though.
"I always thought she was a figment of my imagination. After all, I could never remember her face or name. I even tried to think it might have been Lilith. Then again, you never told me your name to begin with. Isn't that right, little dove?" Alijah chuckled, picturing those moments with better clarity than he had before.
He really remembered them.
So, everything is real. I’m not crazy. Our love is true.
"I didn’t," I answered honestly.
He smiled lovingly at me. In an instant, I was smitten by him. Everything I saw left me wanting more of those expressions that were gushing out of him.
"Do you want to know why I called you that?" Alijah asked.
I nodded slightly, wanting to know as he appeared pleased by my reaction to his question.
"When I stared at you, it was like a light was being shone on my face. You were the purest thing I had ever laid eyes on. Back in my time, doves were used to declare peace. And you Rem, you were my harmony. Still are." He assured.
Unable to take it, I pulled myself to kiss him.
By the gods, how much do I love this Lycan? He is my everything too.
For a moment, we made out as he pulled up my shirt and fondled my breast. The feeling of his skin on mine was ecstasy inducing. I enjoyed his touch and affection, though the moment we separated, a chuckle rose from his lips.
"Alijah... you are breaking me," I whispered, feeling hot and flustered.
He smiled in response.
"And remember that flower I picked for you?" Alijah purred into my ear.
He wanted to shatter me while making sure I knew everything. No more misunderstandings. I would know everything he felt for me.
"The white gardenia," I mumbled, remembering it.
He smirked, playfully placing his thumb on my lips.
"I knew what it meant, love. I lived two years in the elven territory of Allora. What do you expect, silly girl?” He chuckled, tracing his fingers down my lips.
“You are and will always be my gardenia. The purest feeling, I will ever have." Alijah confessed, gazing at me lovingly.
I felt a heartthrob. He was too precious to me. The happiness I was feeling was surreal.
"Is it?" I asked shyly.
My cheeks were probably redder than blood itself.
"Yes, it is. And your silly thought of that cloth I used to wear before I cut my hair, I got it from a village after I escaped." He informed, gazing at me slightly unimpressed by my assumptions.
I felt awkward because of it. It was always just me making things up. Why... did I never ask him?
"Oh..." I fumbled around in my thoughts.
Suddenly, the realization that he had read my journal came to mind.
"Wait, you read..." I started, only to feel his lips on mine a moment later.
Again, he left me breathless and incapable of saying a word. Separating from me, he chuckled a bit, remembering something. My wolf was slightly out of breath, too. Though he soon kissed me lightly again before parting away, biting his bottom lip.
"I find it funny, that I felt star-struck that night I met you. It made me hesitate to kill you. Or hurt you in this case. I don’t think I would have killed you successfully back then either. I completely underestimated the luma that stood in front of me." Alijah continued to chuckle.
I huffed, pulling myself to meet with his lips again lightly. It was unfair how he was changing the subject, but I guess he wanted me to fight for that later.
"And you can now?" I asked playfully.
Well, it’s not like it mattered if he reads my journals.
I had written them for him in a way. He shook his head, pinning my hands next to me before intertwining them with his.
"I wouldn’t even think of it," Alijah answered.
I lifted myself to lick his lip, though my hands were still pinned beside me.
"How about you touch me more? You left me aching earlier." I whimpered, feeling a bit frustrated.
Without letting him speak, I wrapped my legs around his hips. A nervous chuckle to release from his lips. I guess I could tease him after all.
"I will, but after I tell you few more things. Just so you know everything from my perspective." Alijah promised.
I could not help but frown a bit. My heart could barely handle anymore, to be honest.
Does he want me to burst into a flurry of emotions?
"Okay," I whispered, feeling impatient.
His thumb brushed against my lips, taking the chance to rub his member against my vulva. There was only so much teasing I could take before I tackled him into the bed. Though he quickly stopped, mumbling something I did not quite catch. His eyes, though, were full of desire too.
"Rem... don’t hate Lilith or Edna. Be the light that will always outshine the hatred I have within me." He simpered, tenderly gazing at me with those crimson orbs of his.
They were almost mesmerizing to look at.
"Alijah..." I mumbled, unable to find the words to argue back.
The way he was looking at me ate them all up.
"I love you. I think I have since I met you. Even though I was trying to fight it so hard. It was scary." He confessed, biting on his lip before gazing to the side.
"Remember when I licked your mouth when you stole that chocolate from me?" Alijah asked.
I nodded, remembering how my heart almost ran out of me.
"I did that without realizing it." He chuckled, turning back to face me.
"It was not to get you back for kissing or trapping me. I just wanted to do it. Although now I know why I desired to do it.” He paused for a moment, simpering.
“Remember when I kissed you after saving me from those raiders like I was some damsel in distress? That was not for making a new pact or bond. I just thought you were adorable and pure. I wanted to claim you." My wolf chattered happily.
His tail wagged blissfully too. I had never seen him like that before. It was yet another blow to my heart. This would be the end of me.
"But you had just learned about Lilith too," I mumble, trying to find a hold on this speedy heart.
Alijah shook his head.
"I won’t lie that it surprised me to hear we could bring her back, but by that point. You had blown me away by saving me from those raiders. When you told me about her, I honestly didn’t care. Although I got defensive.” He sighed, gazing to the side.
It almost seemed like that troubled him.
“It was a reflex, I guess. Like I was expecting you to use me. But then you melted right through that too.” He shifted his gaze to me again.
“Then I realized... you were my light. The one that your mother told me she wished I would find." He smiled tenderly.
I tilted my head a bit.
"But then when you first held me, you..." I tried to point it out, but he would not let me finish.
"Yeah, I went back to Lilith in my mind, but that was because I never held you like that before. At least that I remembered. And you acted like you regretted kissing me back in the cave too." Alijah noted.
I could not stay quiet about that.
Was that what it looked like to him?
"I never hated it! It is just… I thought you would hate me for being like all those other women." I assured him.
He sighed, tightening his grip on my hands.
"Rem, you already proved to me you were not like the others. From the moment you saved me from those raiders. I mean, you cried for me too when you thought I drowned. And when you kissed me. I... I wanted to..." Alijah started, holding his grip on me.
His eyes glowed lightly, as I knew what he was going to say. If I had not pulled away, I probably would have lost my virginity there. I simpered in response; tears formed on the corners of my eyes. I was being overwhelmed by old feelings.
Noticing this, Alijah licked my cheek.
"Though, I’m glad I was the one who broke you in if you get what I mean." He teased to make me stop crying.
It triggered me to pout a bit. So, it worked.
"Jerk, I wanted it too," I grumbled, not happy by what he had said.
He laughed wholeheartedly because of it.
"But you did the night of the bioluminescent lake and when I held you for the first time in this era. I never had been that gentle with anyone in my life." Alijah tried to hold on to his laughter.
I pouted some more. I think I puffed even my cheeks up in the protest too. He seemed to have fun, though.
"You call that gentle?" I growled.
He continued to chuckle, enjoying my reaction. Though it reminded me of when he thought I was Lilith. The way he held me after differed completely from where it started.
"Yeah, that was me being gentle with you. I mean... I held no one the way I do you, Rem." Alijah assured me.
It left me confused by what he meant.
Is sex not the same every time? I mean... I only have him to compare.
Not that I wanted anyone else.
"What do you mean?" I mumbled.
Alijah shrugged a bit.
"When I was with Lilith, she never wanted me to touch her much. If you get what I mean. It usually was just sticking it in, and that was it. And when it was forced well, I never really responded to anyone as I did to you.” He paused, kissing my forehead.
I regretted asking this question. Though it would bring me a bliss, I never thought I would have.
“And yeah, they fucked me, but that is all they did. I told you before, foreplay was not my forte. Well, until I met you, love." Alijah answered.
I got a bit flustered because of it.
"That means that this morning when you..." I mumbled, struggling to find the words to express myself.
"Yeah, that was the first time I ever kissed anyone there," Alijah smirked playfully.
I felt a type of delight that I thought was never possible.
"And when you sucked me there, it was also a first for me. Well, the first time I ever enjoyed it." He added with a soft smile on his lips.
Unable to help it, I pulled him into a kiss. It was so obvious how much I loved him more than life itself. I was so happy to have some of his first. He was mine, after all. Softly, he pulled away from me.
"The night of the bioluminescent lake was when I realized I could not deny my feelings for you any longer," Alijah confessed, licking his lips.
I want him to touch me. Make me his. Enough words...
"I could not deny them since the moment I met you." I simpered, wanting more of Alijah.
The only thing that stopped me from claiming him was his expression. It was like it was not new to him. Though he had read my journal. But…
"Yeah, I knew how you felt about me since the night," Alijah announced.
He left me utterly perplexed because of it.
"What?" I mumbled, unable to follow along.
He smirked again.
"It was obvious, but I... was reluctant to believe you loved me for me. I thought you wanted me, as everyone else did. That was until you kept showing me how wrong I was.” He chuckled.
“You eventually told me straight up the night of the lake. That was the first time I was like... Ah... I want this girl to bear my pup." Alijah announced.
His words left me, opened. I felt vulnerable under him.
"All that time, I thought you were in love with Lilith," I grumbled, remembering the bitter feelings I felt.
My wolf had always been truthful with me. And to this day, I still could not recall him mentioning that he loved her when he was with me.
"No, when I first came here to this era. I wanted to claim her again. In fact, I don’t think I ever loved her. It’s hard to explain, but what I feel for you, differs completely from what I felt for her." Alijah reassured.
I sighed a bit.
"So that means I can kill her for hurting you?" I asked, frowning a bit.
He shook his head, licking my neck, triggering shivers to run down my spine.
"No, my love, that will be my burden. I’ll put her down like the maggot she is. Same with Edna. So, don’t hate them for me or anyone, actually." Alijah smiled gently, pulling away from my neck.
"It’s unfair though," I complained.
In response, Alijah found his way into my walls. The suddenness of it all caused me to gasp. I was not expecting it at that moment, but how he slipped himself into me was also satisfying. It filled me to the brim again.
"No, it isn't. The funny thing is, I am not killing them for what they did to me. Or for turning me against my brother or best friend, but because of what they did to you. That alone makes me want to make sure that there isn’t an existing piece of them left." My wolf declared, pushing himself completely into me.
A soft moan left his lips as I clasped onto his hands tighter. I knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to make me lose myself in him. Though for now... I would try to let him think he was winning.
"I love you. So, I’ll still hate them for what they did to you." I growled, not wanting to back down too much.
What those women did was intolerable. They had to be punished.
"And I love you, Rem. For now, and for all the eternity that I will be with you after our mortal bodies cease to exist. And if we are reborn, I’ll find you and make you fall in love with me each time." Alijah declared, making love to me.
I clung to his hands, still held me hostage. Every push felt like it was filling me much more than usual.
"I think I will be born loving you next time, too. Seems Fenrir is only meant to love Valdios." I giggled, trying to not mewl too much from his touch.
"I can’t care less if we are their reincarnations or not. And even if you aren’t and are in someone else hands. I’ll win you over. It won’t matter if we are reversed in genders or the same or different races. I’ll always love you, Rem." Alijah assured.
His crimson orbs resonated with mine. There, I found another opportunity to tease my loving wolf. Though it would not work out as I wanted.
"Ew, no... I only like dicks." I teased, unaware of how he would respond.
I did not think I would see him so ticked off. My body froze when he suddenly rammed himself into me. It triggered me to yelp as I gripped his hands tightly. If he had been a human, his hands probably would have shattered undermine.
It is... too deep!
For a moment, he held himself there, grinding himself into me.
"Oi, what did you say?" Alijah growled, a bit annoyed.
My tease backfired. Though it triggered my body to convulse under him because of the overstimulation. In response, he smirked while I could barely control myself. Though my hips bucked, looking for more. He really was unfair.
"I-I am k-kidding!" I gasped, trying to find the air he had knocked out of me.
It was hard to recover after that, though. My words were slightly stuttering too.
"I w-would love you n-no matter what. J-just because you are you. And no way I would love someone else. M-my heart is only yours, Alijah-tan." I simpered, feeling bliss.
"Oi... Again, with the nickname?" Alijah sighed with a soft growl.
Though his thrusting began soon after that question rolled off his lips. Another moan left me, only to be rewarded by a smile on his lips.
"I love you. It still feels surreal, that you picked me." I panted for air.
Every spot in my body felt warm, especially where he was pushing into me.
"I would have been a fool to not choose the girl who loves me the most. After all, something fated us from longer than we both realized." Alijah panted slightly too before kissing me lovingly.
I responded the same way. My body and soul were fully his. Feeling it again, he pulled away from my lips, trying to concentrate on my sweet spots. I could not stay quiet under him for long. Though, I could also not help myself.
"It would have been foolish, huh?" I playfully voiced.
Though, it was shaky since mewls of pleasure wanted to leave me. Upon hearing that, Alijah thrust himself into me fully again. Though it was more gentle than last time. Though it caused me to whine again, feeling his full length in me again.
This... could get addicting. The moment he freed my hands from his grip, I clung to him, causing him to chuckle.
"Rem, thank you for saving my soul from eternal damnation." Alijah purred into my ear, suddenly pulling me up while he sat on the bed.
The motion left me straddling him as he held my hips in place. It kind of reminded me of back in the spring.
"Is that what I did?" I mumbled, trying to find my grip on what was happening.
Though I did not mind being filled with him this way. Nothing he did ever felt bad, just intense.
"Yes, silly girl. You and this family of yours that accepted me even though I never gave them a good reason to." Alijah reassured, smiling.
Though he softly rolled his eyes. "Though your brothers are too easy to pick on. Reminds me of... my own older brother, Lucan."
"They are, aren't they?" I smiled.
He suddenly thrust himself to me once again, triggering me to hold myself up by caging him under me. This was a new feeling.
"Yes," Alijah huffed, licking my chest.
I could feel his fangs drag on my skin. Mewls left my mouth as I drowned in the pleasure the wolf was giving me. Though the moment his movements became sluggish, I swayed my hips to help him.
At that point, he pulled away from my breast, only to meet with my lips. Before I knew it, I was the only one moving while he moaned under me. Waves of pleasure waved through me as he teased my bell with his thumb.
It was not long before the knot tightened to the point of release. His explosion within me left me in bliss, too. It was almost as if white had washed over me. Unable to keep myself up, I collapsed on him, panting for air.
There I was met with a kiss on my forehead as he professed his love for me. A silly thought crossed my enlightened mind, though.
“Hey… Alijah, can I ask you something?” I mumbled, feeling extra exhausted.
“Hmm..?” He hummed, holding me close.
His heartbeat was so loud. It was calming to me. If the day ever came, I wanted to go with him, too.
“If I was a boy too… would you let me you know…” I trailed off, remaining vague.
It was embarrassing to ask. Though, Alijah chuckled wholeheartedly after hearing that. I could feel my cheeks turn pink. I mean, in our previous lives, we were both males. And if what Midnight said was true, then… we surely…
“I would let you do me all you want, my love. Though, you still can if you want. I think you guys have…” He stopped, gazing at me rosy.
That last part, I did not know if it was a tease or not. But I felt like my heart exploded.
I can never… No… Maybe? No… In another life, perhaps…
“No! No… I was just curious.” I yelped, feeling the full brunt of what I said.
In response, he chuckled, holding me closer without saying another word. We cuddled with one another in the bed, enjoying each other's presence. Though the silence did not last. Sadly, there were important things to say.
Alijah filled me in on everything he had learned about his brother and his Silver Fang friend. It made me feel even worse than I did in the beginning. Everything that had happened to my wolf was unfair, and there was one person in the middle of that.
Edna, the eternal witch. I wanted to end her trapping me in this house. And for making Alijah suffer in ways that he never should have. Though the elders were also to blame. No... many people were to blame.
To make all the individuals pay, I would have to get stronger. Get better at everything, and maybe then I could live the life I wanted. But who would have thought that I would also lose just as much as I gained?
Everything that was to come would come at a cost I never foresaw. No matter how strong I was, no matter how much I tried to keep everyone safe. What was coming would rumble our lives in ways I never thought possible.
For now, though, I drifted into a peaceful sleep in Alijah's arms. I was oblivious to all the hardships that awaited me in the foreseeable future. Then again, when wasn’t I?